Mother-in-law Trouble

Updated on April 30, 2008
T.H. asks from Phoenix, AZ
11 answers

My fiancies father pasted away about 2 years ago. Since then the siblings (his sister and himself) have been supporting the mom. She is a school crossing guard so she doesn't make enough to live on. She has some health problems which prohibit her from finding a different higher paying job. Recently his sister has ran into some financial difficulties and we are unable to pay for all of her living expenses. I was wondering if anyone one knew of some way that we could find her help for her expenses. My sister in law says that she asked des about health care and they said she made to much! I don't know how ###-###-#### a month is to much but that is what she claims. We would greatly appreciate any feed back.

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More Answers

G.M.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi Trisha,
I did a little research for you and found this website for "State Health Insurance Assistance Program" (SHIP). http://www.azdes.gov/aaa/programs/ship/default.asp
Click on the "Programs and Services" under the MENU on the left side of the page. I believe this will help you find something for her. Your mother in law should be able to collect on her husband's Social Security. DES is WRONG about your mother in law making too much. I call 1000/mth hardly an income to live on! Shame on them. Hopefully you can find someone from there that actually CARES about people like one of the other responders said. My mother in law makes only 900/mth and is living in a senior community in phx. She only has to pay rent and her utilities are paid for by the complex. It's really sad that Social Security doesn't pay out enough for people to live on. I would also try AARP if she drives. That will lower her insurance on her car. Does she not qualify for Medicare, or Medicaid? If she has some outstanding bills that she is not able to pay off, please try contacting SERTOMA CLUB in MESA. Here's their website: http://www.sertoma.org/issi/members/findaclub.asp?action=...
My Dad belongs to Sertoma in Roswell New Mexico and they sometimes are able to help people in dier need of paying off their outstanding bills. You'll have to present to them a detailed statment of her bills that she needs help on. I hope both of these websites can help you assist your mother in law. Update us and let us know how she is doing and if you find a resolution for her. Best wishes, G.

PS: Didn't realize that I just researched and found DES. I never heard of them and thought I came up with something different for you. I'm sorry. I do hope you find something for your mother in law. Best wishes,G.

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P.T.

answers from Phoenix on

How old is she? Does she qualify for Social Security? She can collect her husbands, instead of hers. Did she collect her husbands Death Benefit from Social Security? Does she qualify for disability? If her medical problems keep her form supporting herself than she needs to check into it. I'm sure there are agencies out there who can help/direct you. Try DES and also check out the web site for the State of Arizona.
Good Luck

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Z.B.

answers from Tucson on

I'm sorry about your father-in-law passing away. Maybe your mother-in-law needs to consolidate her bills. Help he do that and then go from there. I hope you and your family are doing well.

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N.R.

answers from Phoenix on

If she has some kind of disability she should be elidgible for federal disability. That is not the same as Social Security.

My father is 100% disabled and when they made that determination they paid him from the date he applied. He got a check for like 22K and actually had to payback money to his pension because he made to much. It's a SLOW process but may be your only option.

Best of luck!

N.

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N.O.

answers from Albuquerque on

Hello T.,
I am not sure what kind of help you need or what you have tried to get. But have you tried to get LIHEAP to pay her PNM bills?
here is the website if you have any questions.
http://www.pnm.com/customers/liheap.htm

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R.K.

answers from Phoenix on

des wont give any help if there r no kids involved but wat about social security

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

without actualy applying for aid you wil never know what she is eligible for. my parents make about 900 a month on social security and don't work because my mom has cancer. they qualify for ACCHS but only get $10 in food stamps because the y own three vehicles and their worth puts them in a higher bracket. What kind of health problems does she have? that could at least factor in what her expenses are, the more medical expenses she has, the more she qualifies for. does she own her home? how much is it worht. she could technically sell it for a very low amount toyour fiancee and her sister and then she wouldnt have that liability. How old is she? she can also apply for discounts on utilities for low income people. also put her in contact with social service agency such as food banks etc. they usually know other programs she would qualify for. here in southern AZ we have Catholic community services. it serves all the community not just catholics but they have transportations services among many others. but DES is the first stop. especially if she has medical problems that dont allow her to work. sometimes they even qualify for subsidised rent and general assistance, which is money. it all depends on her assets and liabilites.and her pride. it takes some time todo all that but it is well worth it when family is the ones supporting them. also contact local churches.

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C.D.

answers from Flagstaff on

Hi T.,
You might try Catholic Social Services and St. Vincent De Paul. My grandmother received assistance from them and she made a lot more money than 1000.00 a month. AARP also has health insurance benefits and depending on how old she is, she may be eligible for medicare. Hope this helps! God Bless you!

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N.E.

answers from Albuquerque on

I would inquire with the state about medicaid and other programs for older people. It doesn't hurt to ask.

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G.A.

answers from Phoenix on

OMG, ok, DES can help. I make 1960 before deductions a month...i am on assistance. they can help...and if you need help i have a caseworker 2 doors down that can help with any information and what not. I have been dealing with DES for almost 5 years now, they say things that will deteer someone from wanting to pursue to opening a case. Not all of them care, but there are some that will bust their "ass" to help us out! Let me know what i can do to help.

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I.O.

answers from Phoenix on

come on now ,is she realy that bad ? i have gone though almost the same ,but it is me that makes nothing .so i had to give up everything and move over 2,000 miles away to move with my children ,believe me there are always bumps.but i get to spend a lot of time with my grandson ,and my daughter being a single parent get's to have a life .this does not mean she is gone all
the time far from it .she works full time ,has collage online full time and maybe 2 times a month she goes out ,thats if she does not fall asleep first.and when she does go out she knows her son is safe ,sure lots of ups and downs with this but .if we can't count on family ,then who???also your mom has a good income campaired to some even my self mine is well under $700.00a month and i have lots of medical prob 's some meds are well over $200.00 a month .one day she won't be here and then what is the sibblings going to chat about ,i don;t mean to be so up front but ,if we don't have family what do we have ,also you are a mom ,sure your children are young .and one day they are going to be adults .if it were them trying to care for you what do you think they should do ?fight over who will pay what ?if you are the loving and teaching kind of mom that i believe you are you will instill good in your children ,that family comes first.please don't take this wrong .it took me a 1 year to make my mind up and believe me it was hard .but then again nothing is easy ,put faith in what and how you help and it will be fine
and finaly ,it is only money you can't take it with you .

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