Momma Gone Crazy

Discipline means to teach. Your son had a bad experience and you're right, he probably had reason to be cranky. But, he needs to LEARN now that he can't act like that any more. You have to be the grown up. If he cries because he doesn't get his way, he cries. You shouldn't be doing things for him that he can do himself. You shouldn't hold him all the time. He may be somewhat afraid of breaking his leg again, but you need to have him do more and regain his confidence. You shouldn't compromise, and you shouldn't bribe (although I have used bribery for the short term, there are some things I won't compromise)

If he can't have something, you just repeat over and over "No, you can't have it" no whys, no compromise, no alternatives. Just no. If he has a tantrum, let him have a tantrum. It bothers you WAY more than it bother him - that's why so many kids have tantrums. They are pretty powerfu. While he is having his tantrum, imagine him at 18 years old. What kind of young man do you want him to be? Someone who is lazy, with a bad attitude, and acts out when he doesn't get his way? Or, a responsible, respectful, young man to be proud of? This is where it starts.

Be strong, it may not be easy, but keep that image of him at 18.

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The poor thing. I can't even imagine being in a body cast at my age, much less with the evergy of a two year old. I would first take him to the doc to have him checked out.

He is entering the stage of brattyness though. Age "Three" gets even worse. And then for some reason it smooths out again. Don't let him get away with it. He's not sick now so you have to be committed to what you say and try not to make pointless threats.

God Bless you,
L. B

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To a 2-year-old, four weeks may as well be his whole life. His bad attitude (even though understandable) worked for him then so he'd expect it to work for him now. The way he treated his family was tolorated so it became normal. Plus, he's two! You have to show him a lot of love, but never give into a tantrum or nastiness toward others. No has to mean no. Reward all good behavior with kind words and ignore the bad behavior as much as you can. You may have a rough week or so, but once he sees that tantrum get him nothing, he'll stop having them. Besides ignoring the negative, be proactive in the positive. Show him how to do things for himself and let him know how proud you are of him. Make sure he has enough to do to keep him occupied. Give him some important jobs to do and let him know what a great helper he is.

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ooh, that's a problem i see all the time. i'm a peds nurse and we get kids in casts like that and they just get so spoiled (no offense, i would do the same) while immobilized and who can blame them? but it sure makes it hard to deal with. lots of patience, mama, and ignore his tantrums, DON'T GIVE IN, and constantly reassure him that you are all taking care of him so he doens't need a cast again, sometimes fear plays a big part in it. good luck!

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Everything from compromising to bribery? Have you tried discipline? Seriously, I just went through the most terrible child tantrum with my daughter's half sister, and we were working with a counsler to get her back on track. The only thing that woked was what I call Severe Time Outs. Start with an Alone Time Out, away from the rest of the family, but where you can monitor him, until the worst of the kicking ans screaming wears off. Then sit down and talk to him LIKE AN ADULT. Kids are very intelligent, and if he's looking for response (attention) and instead gets construction, he'll figure it out. You're looking at a hard core month, but then you can work into Timed Time Outs...sit him down nearer the activity, after he's quit crying, tell him you're setting the timer and so long as he behaves, when it rings he can get up. Our counselor suggested 1 minute for every year old. Again, construction. Eventually, you'll work your way to regular discipline....Oh, and PRAY...you will survive this, but it's not going to be easy.

He may have gotten use to all of the attention & don't want to give that up BUT you have got to quit catering to him. Say "NO" & stand firm on it. Would you at all be interested in being a SAHM or having a work scheldule that YOU CHOOSE to work when & how you want? I do Mary Kay P/T & have found the money to be grrrreat & the hours I set myself. It gives me an outlet & I've met some wonderful women through my business, the tax write offs are nice & it gives you the chance to go & come when you want. You can do it out of your home if you want too. IF your interested I'd be glad to share the business with you & then you can decide. I work a F/T job of 50-60 hours a week but I LOVE my MK job much better & am currently building my unit, you can reach me @ ###-###-#### or ###-###-#### (cell). Good luck & God Bless!

Let me know any advise you have with the body cast as my son (13 months) is set for surgery in June and will be in a spica cast for 6 weeks. YIKES!!!

You gotta love these stages. We have been using a system called "123 magic" it is a video to help parents get the control back. You can probably find it at the library. Although we get off track sometimes. When we do our part with it (which is just a matter of remembering) it seems to make things better.
good luck
D.

Hopefully your son is young enough that before too long he will forget about his leg and body cast. My suggestions for the behavior are these: When he does something nice, throw a party! Praise and love on him and let him know he did the right thing. When he throws a fit, especially if it is a kicking, screaming fit, move him to somewhere safe (like his bedroom with the door pulled to) and leave him there-don't even look back. When he calms down, go back and tell him if he's finished he may return to whatever he was doing. The hardest part is NOT GIVING IN! Good luck with your little guys. My first two were close in age also and it was tough!

Have you tried using a time out chair? I know this sounds dumb, but I watch Super Nanny on TV all the time, and she is big in using a "naughty chair." When he is acting up, getting mean, or whatever you get down to his eye level, tell him firmly that he will not act like that and give a warning that if the behavior continues he will have to sit in the naughty chair for two minutes. When the behavior continues (and it will) put him in a designated time out place and make him sit there. If he gets off, put him back, as many times as it takes until he has sat there for his two minutes. If he cries and screams, let him. When the two minutes are up, take him off the chair, let him know again why he had to be on the naughty seat, and let him know that you love him even though he was being mean. Give him a kiss and hug and let him go back to playing. It really does work like a charm because it shows that you mean business, you are the one in charge, and kids HATE to be in time out. Just make sure that you stay calm, stay in charge, and do it every time his behavior warrents it. As soon as he sees that you are not going to tolerate his bad behavior anymore, he should start to back off from his tactics, as they won't work anymore.....

It sounds like he hit the terrible twos at the same time. My daughter is going through some of that, crying when she doesn't get her way, and only wants to be held by me...and she wasn't even in a body cast. She is driving me crazy also!!!! I don't know where she learned that move where they throw themselves on the floor and roll around like the world is crashing in around them, but she is a master. I read an article about their behavior at this time. It said that kids at this age don't know healthier ways to show their frustrations. When they are throwing the tantrums you need to ignore the behavior and when they are done try to redirect and let him know what he needs to do to get what he wants. Just try to hang on to your sanity for dear life while it is going on. The other behaviors (kicking and hitting) is something I would think needs to be punished, maybe with timeout, to let him know it is unacceptable.

My son was 18 months old when the babysitters husband tripped over the baby gate and fell on him, and busted his leg. He was in that horrible body cast, wow, it sure was hard to keep a diaper on him, we finally found that a long handled wooden spoon would tuck it in and then we'd tape it with diaper tape to the cast. After every diaper change, we'd blow dry the cast to keep it dry because he had eczema and I was afraid of the monster staph infections.

Through it all he was a real trouper, and way cheerful, he finally figured out how to army crawl with his arms and drag himself around the house. Right before getting the cast cut off, he started pulling himself up on the furniture to stand up. We discouraged it but he about wore us out keeping him down.

He didn't get upset with us over it though. I don't know what would make your son so angry with everyone outside of just frustration at not being able to do much. Whats' wrong with holding him? He's out of the cast and you actually can hold him now, maybe he felt left out because it is hard to have that kind of contact when he was in the cast? He saw his brother being held and he couldn't be?
It's so hard to say what's going on, but perhaps he needs the extra attention, and is trying to get it however you'll give it to him. Negative or positive.