K.J. asks from Dayton, OH on April 20, 2007
Miss No Naps
Hello,
My almost three year old has decided she doesn't want to take naps anymore. Every afternoon I read her a story, tuck her into her bed with her music on, and then the battle begins. We spend the next hour or so with her coming out of her room saying she is not tired or that she doesn't want to take a nap and then me dragging her back to her room and tucking her in again, and again, and again... By the time she actually falls asleep, if she falls asleep, it’s pretty late in the day to be sleeping and then I have a hard time getting her to sleep at night. If she doesn't eventually give in and fall asleep then she gets really grumpy around dinner time, so it seems like she still needs her naps but I'm not sure if it’s worth the battle. Has anyone else had this problem? How old were your kids when they quit napping and how did you know they were ready?
So What Happened?™
Well, we started doing "quiet time" instead of "nap time" and she has actually fallen asleep each time with out complaining. For the first time since my son was born, I actually had them both sleeping at the same time - it was wonderful! Thank you so much for all of your responses and advice! :)
Featured Answers
S.P. answers from Cleveland on April 21, 2007
Katie, if she's 3 she's may be ready to give her naps up now. My son gave his naps up right around then but my daughter took them till she was 6! lol! It all depends on the child. Honestly imo at that age, 3, it's not worth a battle anymore.
S.
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L.M. answers from Mansfield on April 27, 2007
Hello,
I have a child that is three years old also. She doesn;t take many naps anymore. I leave it to her to decide whether or not she's going to take one. Only you can really decide whether or not you want to give up onnaps or not. If she is tired around dinner time, feed her and put her to bed then. Just a suggestion.
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K.B. answers from Cincinnati on April 21, 2007
Instead of calling it nap time, how about call it rest time? Let her feel like a big girl. My son still takes naps, and we have days that he fights it and fights it. All I do, or whoever is watching him, is tell him he HAS to lay in bed for at least one hour and rest. It would be good for his eyes if he let them close so he can see better later but he doesn't HAVE to fall asleep. He normally falls asleep and we have to wake him up.
My mom use to babysit a 4 year old two years ago that refused to take his naps but would also get extremely fussy. She would set a timer and say he had to lay down until the time went off. She normally set it for like 45 minutes, and he would fall asleep and then she would just clear the timer and let him sleep. If he didn't fall asleep, at least he was resting for 45 minutes.
Just remember to stick to your guns! When it's nap time, it's naptime...she is pushing to see what she can get away with. Once she knows nap time isn't something she can get away with it will get easier again.
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T.L. answers from Cleveland on April 22, 2007
lol... I can't help but you laugh at your situation. My daughter when she was 2 1/2 didn't want to take naps anymore. It was a complete battle with her, she's now 5 and doesn't take naps at all unless she wants to. Luckily she's not that grumpy anymore. I also have a 2 yr old daughter who doesn't want to take naps either. Sometimes I will turn cartoons on and she sits on the couch and usually falls alseep at a decent time in the afternoon. There is not such thing as the "terrible two's" ending. I think they become worse at 3. The best advice I can give you in stop trying to make her take naps, when she's tired she'll eventually fall asleep. Just give her dinner a hour or so before you actually eat dinner so at least you know she's had something in her belly when she actually falls asleep. They always think they are going to miss something and I think that's the main reason they don't want to nap when they get that age. Hope this helps a little.
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V.K. answers from Dayton on April 21, 2007
My mother-in-law had a great solution to this problem. When you put her down for a nap just tell her she can either nap or not, but she has to stay in her bed for an hour...or however long she usually naps for. That way, she has a choice, sleep won't be so traumatic for her, and typically they fall asleep from sheer boredem. Warn her that if she gets out of her bed before time is up, then you will give her a time-out and the hour starts again from the time she's done with time-out.
You might also try working out with her in the morning about an hour before you put her down for a nap. Get her nice and tired and it might end up being less of a battle. Plus, not only is it a chance to get her tired, but you're getting healthy together and bonding:)
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H.B. answers from Columbus on April 23, 2007
Both my boys gave up naps around 2 1/2. I would have liked children that took naps until 4 or 5 but that is not what I got. My problem was that they would lay down for a nap no problem, it was bedtime that became a problem. It was when they weren't going to sleep until 1 AM I said "enough" (they were IN bed at 8, but wouldn't sleep until 1) So I cut out the naps and now they sleep from 8PM until 8-9AM. I don't know that my experiences really help in your situation but I found this article that might
http://www.babycenter.com/expert/toddler/toddlersleep/764...
Good luck!!
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A. answers from Cincinnati on April 21, 2007
Hi,
I hate to to be the one to tell you...3 is much more difficult than the 2 with little girls! The good news is that when they turn 4 it is smooth sailing for several years!!!
My girls are almost grown but I thought I might share with you what I did....My daughter din't think she needed naps either at that age...she might not of but I sure needed her to need one! Everyday we called it special time...like a game. We agreed she didn't have to take a nap just be quiet for 60 minutes. We set an alarm and gave her a pile of books and stuffed animals...anything she could do stay in bed. The deal was she didn't have to sleep...but 6 days out of 7 she did. And I got what I needed, a break. You have to have a consequence if she comes out of her rooom or makes noise. Just be firm and say this is the rule...and mean it!
We also used the magic lamp for bedtime (lamp on a timer) when it came on it was time to get in bed before it went off. It's amazing how much easier some things are if you can remove the conflict. Kids this age understand signals, not always reasons. The most important thing I can tell you is be consistent even if it is easier to just give in.
Good Luck!
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S.P. answers from Cleveland on April 21, 2007
Katie, if she's 3 she's may be ready to give her naps up now. My son gave his naps up right around then but my daughter took them till she was 6! lol! It all depends on the child. Honestly imo at that age, 3, it's not worth a battle anymore.
S.
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W.S. answers from Cleveland on April 22, 2007
My 4 yo daughter gave up naps at age 2! It was always a struggle for us, and I had to lay down with her. But, as another Mom suggested, I did move the bed time earlier, like to 7:00, and I found that worked better overall. I don't know what time your princess gets up, mine slept until at least 7 until lately (now she goes to bed later and gets up at 8) so she was getting almost 12 hours of sleep.
Also like other Moms said, you can make it a quiet time if you just want the break. I know several moms who do that, and the kids just have to stay in their rooms and play quietly alone for however long (2 hours for ex). Isn't this what daycares do? Maybe if she doesn't feel you are pressuring her to actually sleep she won't fight it as much. You may have to set some consequence for coming out of the room though, at first.
Now, if I think my dd needs a nap, I tell her she has to lay still and quiet for 10 min and then if she's still awake I'll let her get up. I tell her the 10 min starts when she stops fidgeting etc., so it usually takes longer than 10 min LOL. Of course, I am in the room with her. But I stick to my word and sometimes she falls asleep, sometimes she doesn't and I let her get up regardless of how grumpy or tired she seems. (but I do discipline her for whining and complaining)
Hope that helps!
Lynn
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S.P. answers from Dayton on April 22, 2007
Hmm... I see you also have a 3 month old, so I'm guessing you are pretty tired yourself at naptime. I have 5 children ages 4 to 11 1/2. I've been there a few times. I babysit for a 22mo. old and a 3yr. old, and I have a 5yr. and 4yr. of my own at home during naptime. Naptime is naptime for everyone. Even I sit down to rest. The house is quiet. My 5 yr. old goes right to sleep still, but my 4y. old was fighting it. My solution: Put him on the couch to "rest", while I work on the computer or watch a "boring" cooking show or the history channel. His rule is to face the back of the couch and "rest" (I use "rest" instead of "sleep"). The soft noise of the computer keys or the boredom of my t.v. shows quickly (30-40 min. later) lull him to sleep. Then I get a little peace and quiet for an hour or 2. If you doze off, it's okay. You're a mom, and we all know Moms don't sleep deeply. You'll wake up at the slightest sound. My grandmother still advises me to use naptime to get myself rested for the rest of the day.
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