M.V. asks from Grayslake, IL on February 09, 2008
Making Friends - Grayslake,IL
A little frustrated. I have lived here for 3 years. In this time it has been hard to make friends. When you finally get to know some one it turns out they weren't really a friend. Sometimes I wish we were back home in Michigan. We would like to meet other couples with children too. We were going to join a bowling league but we don't have any family here and babysitters every other weekend is expensive. If there is any one out there in the same boat as us please write.
S.W. answers from Chicago on February 11, 2008
I have also lived here about three years. I moved here from Utah. I am 26 and have a 3 yr. old boy and a 1 yr. old girl. My husband's name is Kelvin. I would love to get together. I live in Lake County.
L.E. answers from Chicago on February 10, 2008
I've lived here my entire life and even some of my old high school friends are still in the area. But, I can tell you, being in your hometown or miles away, it's still hard to meet people. Especially when you have kids. It's also hard at our ages (I'm 28 and my husband is 28...we have two girls) with kids. We were the first of our friends to have children and even now, people we meet w/ kids our kids' ages are older than we are. Which honestly doesn't bother us, but that's just what it seems to have been.
Look up MOPS (Mothers Of PreSchoolers) online and find a group near you. Many churches also have mother/child groups. These have never been my personal cup of tea, but I know other moms who absolutely love them. You can also go online and find groups of moms that meet for playdates in your area...I can't remember what the site is called, I'm so sorry! A girlfriend of mine met five lovely women she's become quite close with by going to one of those playdates.
If your child is in daycare and tends to gravitate toward one or two other kids in his class, perhaps write a note to the mom letting her know that your kids seem to play so well together that maybe you should get together on a weekend for a playdate.
You're not alone, though... there are many of us moms out there lonely overworked. Sometimes that just comes with the territory! :)
A.W. answers from Chicago on February 11, 2008
I am in the same boat. We moved here almost 2 years ago and now have an almost 3 year old and 7 month old, no family close by and no babysitters. I have joined a moms club at the library in Lake Villa and a stay-at-home moms circle at my church in Libertyville. I am slowly making friends through those groups. Playgroups are great because the kids are all the same age. Another idea we're trying to put to use is finding a family to do date nights with. You and your husband find a couple you know with kids. Once a month you and your husband watch all the kids so the other couple can go out and another night you and your husband go out and the other couple will watch the kids. It's fun to do family outings too with that same couple so all the kids learn to trust everyone. Hope that makes sense and helps!
M. answers from Chicago on February 09, 2008
I hear you! For some reason, I have a hard time making friends too. I'm friendly, but more so when I actually know someone, and if you are quiet to begin with, you have a hard time. I think people in the area are just different? Also, being a young mom(26), I feel a little awkward. I go out with a lot of moms in the area, that I found through meetup.com. You may want to try that.
I would also be more than happy to talk or get together with you. Maybe we can meet half-way? Let me know if you are interested.
A.N. answers from Chicago on February 10, 2008
Good Morning -
Funny - we just relo'd from Michigan just a year ago & I've spent the last year working hard to establish friendships.... It's not easy as you're the "new" person & it's up to you to put yourself out there to meet friends. Keep in mind that people who live here usually have their friends already in place so they may not necessary be actively looking for new ones.
There are a few places that I've met great woman & in turn - great other families (hubbies & kids to do things with). First I signed up for a mom/tot class at the Park & Rec. Another thing I did that I just love is found a MOPS class. It is a wonderful place to find other great mom's. We've also found a great church home.... When your little one gets in pre-school you'll be amazed how much that helps - you have a full class room of other mom's to meet. We have an almost 3 year old & he's been in a 2 year pre-school class since fall & loves it. (which burb to you live in?)
Again - at these places - you have to be outgoing enough to say hi - I'm M...... blah blah... Don't wait for others to talk to you first - it might not happen. I always just say hi & then ask or say something about their child.... mom's LOVE to chat about their kids so give the person a chance to do that & you're conversation is started...
Good luck to you -
PS - where in MI did you move from?
L.H. answers from Chicago on February 10, 2008
i dont have much friends my self im home alot and i have lived here my whole life, consider having coffee sometime, I live in the wheeling area,
B.V. answers from Chicago on February 10, 2008
Boy oh boy do I know what you mean! I've lived here almost 2 years and it's been very hard for me to make friends here as well. I found it much easier to make friends when my kids were younger and you could join playgroups and such. But my kids are all middle school and older and it just isn't as easy. Plus, I don't have a car every day like I used to. So that doesn't help. It seems that those that want to make friends have young children and only want to make friends with parents with young children and parents of older children here already have their "set" friends and don't seem to want anymore. @@ It's quite lonely around here. I second what some of the others said -- playgroups. And I know that when mine were that age I took them to the local library for sing-a-long and storybook time and met other parents there too. Good luck!
C.H. answers from Chicago on February 11, 2008
I'm not sure where you are located but I am in a wonderful moms group in Mchenry County called Mom-2-Mom. We offer playgroups for all ages, monthly kids parties and planned activities and monthly mom only events like bunco, book club, scrapbooking and moms night out. We also have couples night out as well as dads night out and a babysitting co-op. For more info, you can call our hotline at ###-###-####. You can also try meetup.com, google-ing moms group, or there is a website called matchingmoms.org where you can find other moms in your area.
J.G. answers from Chicago on February 10, 2008