J.F. asks from Oregon, OH on April 08, 2010
Leg Shaving...what's Your Opinion?
My daughter is 9 1/2. She is going through obvious early puberty changes...boobs budding, serious body odor, hormonal issues. She has very thick hair, although it is blonde. Last summer, she made a comment on how hairy her legs were and when would she be old enough to shave them. I told her we would talk more about it next spring...meaning now. Well, she's brought it up again. She says it feels gross to have all that hair on her legs and wants to get rid of it before the kids start making fun of her. I asked her if anyone had said anything to her and she said no, but they've said things to other girls (a couple who have darker hair). Her's is not really noticable unless you're close to her, but once she starts to get outside more and get some color on her skin, it becomes VERY obvious. I have talked with my husband about it and he says its up to me and whatever I decide is fine. I was like 11 when I started shaving, but that is also when I started all of the other changes too. I'm thinking she's developing faster than I did. How old were you when you started shaving? What about your daughter? Any thoughts? I've already talked with her about how she'd have to do it all the time or it would get poky (using dadys 5 o'clock shadow as an example) and if she was poky, the other kids would surely make fun if they felt it.
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T.F. answers from Dallas on April 08, 2010
She is growing up mom! Her self esteem and confidence is SO important now because she is about to go through a tough part of her life with all the changes.
Please, let he shave.... If it is bothering her....it is already dealing a blow to her self-esteem
My daughter was around 10 when she started shaving. She is 15 now.
I do anything I can to help my daughter maintain her self confidence. Middle and high school kids are brutal when they find something to tease about. It is awful to see things they say on websites and in front of each other regarding weight gain, size of a girl's breasts, acne. I am SO glad I am done with high school
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D.B. answers from Charlotte on April 08, 2010
Let her shave when she wants to. These legs are hers, and it's really not up to someone else to make her feel like she has to keep living with all that hair. My own sister went through this, though her leg hairs were dark. My mom argued the point for a while, and it affected my sister a lot.
It doesn't matter when we started shaving, or using tampons or deoderant, whatever it is, when we were young. It's a different world today, so let her shave if she wants to.
All my best,
D.
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M.S. answers from Appleton on April 08, 2010
My grandfather would not let my mom shave until she was 16 years old. She has horror stories about wearing black tights all the time, and hating dresses, never wearing shorts, etc. because of it. So she "vowed" to let my sister and I start shaving whenever we asked her. I started at age 10 I believe.
My suggestion though would be to try "Veet". It's like a foam you put on and use a plastic thing (looks like a razor but has no blades) that takes the hair off with the cream. It can be a bit messy but is much safer than shaving. Otherwise, maybe you can have her start taking a bath (this is how my mom did it) once every week or two and you can sit on the edge and help her shave for the first few months. I found it is MUCH more easy to shave it the bathtub vs. the shower.
I hope all the suggestions help!!!
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P.G. answers from Dallas on April 08, 2010
I'd do the smooth-away or electric razor to avoid her cutting herself. I have dark hair, so I can't speak to this directly, but you can't avoid the fact that her body is maturing, so you might as well make the journey with her. The fact that she's asking you is great, and a nice way to stay involved. Maybe hit the library for books on puberty and helping to communicate the experience to her. I think it's nice that other cultures have "coming of age" ceremonies - perhaps you can turn some of her puberty experiences into that kind of thing - a celebration. Take care :)
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J.R. answers from Cleveland on April 08, 2010
My daughter is 10 now, and she started shaving her legs last summer (shortly before her 10th birthday). Much like your daughter, her hair was blonde, but fairly long/thick, and it was pretty noticeable in the sunlight.
Regarding the 'poky' thing, my daughter (surprisingly) doesn't have to shave all the time. I'm sure that's coming, but right now her hair grows back pretty soft. She shaved every few weeks during the summer, and hardly at all during the winter.
I hope this is helpful. Our babies are growing up!!
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J.F. answers from Kansas City on April 08, 2010
My daughter started asking about shaving her legs at 10 and we decided she coud try the Smooth Away pads. They are like a gentle sandpaper and rub the hair right off. You apply lotion afterward and then the legs are softer than you'd think possible. My daughter's hair is also blonde- and the regrowth happens very slowly and gradually. This works really well for my daughter and saves me the worry of her cutting herself. Just be sure she doesn't try it under her arms- my daughter did without my knowing and came out of the bathroom with wetwashcloths under her arms ouch!
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D.B. answers from Charlotte on April 08, 2010
Let her shave when she wants to. These legs are hers, and it's really not up to someone else to make her feel like she has to keep living with all that hair. My own sister went through this, though her leg hairs were dark. My mom argued the point for a while, and it affected my sister a lot.
It doesn't matter when we started shaving, or using tampons or deoderant, whatever it is, when we were young. It's a different world today, so let her shave if she wants to.
All my best,
D.
3 moms found this helpful
T.F. answers from Dallas on April 08, 2010
She is growing up mom! Her self esteem and confidence is SO important now because she is about to go through a tough part of her life with all the changes.
Please, let he shave.... If it is bothering her....it is already dealing a blow to her self-esteem
My daughter was around 10 when she started shaving. She is 15 now.
I do anything I can to help my daughter maintain her self confidence. Middle and high school kids are brutal when they find something to tease about. It is awful to see things they say on websites and in front of each other regarding weight gain, size of a girl's breasts, acne. I am SO glad I am done with high school
3 moms found this helpful
A.C. answers from Cincinnati on April 08, 2010
I think leg-shaving falls under the same category as using deodorant (which is a completely different category than using make-up!) It is not about how old the child is, but whether it is necessary or contributes to a child's self-esteem (or the reverse). Let your daughter shave if she wants to! If she gets teased for her leg-hair, you'll feel just awful, and leave it up to her how often she decides to do it. There are still plenty of milestones you can put off until she's older, but this one is a relatively minor thing that will make her feel more comfortable in her own skin.
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A.H. answers from Minneapolis on April 08, 2010
My DD is almost 8 (July 3), and I am terrified of beginning to have these issues. I developed late, didn't have my first period until I was 13 and a freshman in high school. I was blonde with very light hair. I didn't even consider shaving for a long time. I was probably a little over 13 when I started shaving. However, my cousin had very dark hair. Her body hair was very thick and very noticeable. She became self-conscious much earlier than I did. With assistance from her mother, she began using an electric razor around 9 or 10. I believe if my aunt had not helped her, she would have done it behind her back.
In the end, I don't believe there is a certain age that we can say yes it is now appropriate. Girls mature at such different rates. None of them are the same. If you feel your daughter is mature enough and can handle this responsibility (although for a short period of time it will seem like such a big privilege to her), then go ahead and let her. At the end of the day, you must do what feels right for you and your DD.
Good luck!
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J.P. answers from Boise on April 08, 2010
That seems so young to me. I was in the 6th grade and it was the firsts boy/girl dance. I know that you have told her about the 5 o'clock shadow, but also let her know (if you let her) that she doesn't have to shave every day and the less she shaves, the slower the hair will grow. Maybe have her start with once a month? I also think that at 9.5 I wouldn't want her having a razor, so an electric might be a better option.
I would talk to her and make sure that she is doing it for the right reasons. Not peer pressure.
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