Late Talker? - Des Moines,IA

Updated on July 07, 2009
S.C. asks from Des Moines, IA
25 answers

My son will be 18 months in a coupe of weeks. And he does NOT talk! He'll occaisionally say Mama, but that's it. He is VERY verbal-- he just speaks "Isaac-ese" instead of English. so I know he can make all the neccessary sounds. I'm pretty convinced he CAN talk, he just WON'T. Every now and then he parrots a word (even hard one's, like "hilarious" or phrases like "excuse me") I was talking to my StepMom yesterday and she agrees that he CAN talk too, but usually doesn't-- she says if she goes to the bath room and shuts the door he'll yell "Grandma" clear as a bell, but he refuses to say it otherwise! She says that he gets everything he wants without talking, so he doesn't see the need to bother. And he DEFINITELY UNDERSTANDS everything that's said to him!

This is typical of his pattern of development-- I KNEW he could roll over for weeks before he actually did it, then he one night he just rolled and rolled (he was to busy trying to crawl to bother rolling before then) and I KNEW he could walk for MONTHS before he'd take more than 5 steps at a time, then one day I went to pick him up from my Dad and StepMom and he came RUNNING to the door, and he's been running ever since. So I'm kind of convinced that someday soon, he will just start spouting off complete sentences, but in the meantime I'm getting a little frustrated!

What can I do next?

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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

S., don't worry. He is still very very young to be speaking. Both of my children didn't speak much their first couple years and then one day when they were about 3 or 3 1/2 they just started speaking whole sentences. Don't let anyone make you doubt him, he sounds quite normal and so smart to have developed his own style of language!

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C.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My nephew was just like this. Now he is 6 years old and in kindergarten. His teachers wanted to move him up to first grade because he was so advanced! I've heard that late talking can be a sign of high intelligence :). Good luck!
C.

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M.N.

answers from Madison on

He is more than likely fine. My son was a late talker too. He was signing more than talking up until just last week. He just started going through a vocabulary explosion in the last few days and he is almost 21 months old. I wouldn't worry too much for the next few months. My little guy is definitely becoming a "parrot" right now.

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B.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I don't think 18mos is considered late.... so relax!

My oldest didn't speak until close to his 3rd bday. We had his hearing tested a few times, but we knew he could hear us because he could follow directions. He would point, grunt, make sounds.. and say some words. A few months before his 3rd bday (and him picking up words here nad there but still being really quiet otherwise) he woke up one morning (I'm not kidding) and started talking full sentences. By 3 he was using large words correctly and reading words he recognized. By 4.5 he was reading books and having intellectual discussions. He's 7 now and in advanced classes at school and he's very smart.

My point is, relax! He's only 18mos old and thats not considered late at all! He's still young, just encourage him to speak by having him say thank you, please, try the words for whate he wants like drink, bites, etc.

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

I got pregnant with my third when my second was 18-months-old. He wasn't talking much at all and I was TERRIFIED I was going to have TWO non-communicative babies to take care of. It was AMAZING how much progress he made in just a few months. By the time the baby was born, my toddler was able to tell us stories and carry on full-blown conversations.
My mom said she knew I could talk long before I actually did. She said I said almost nothing until one day when I started speaking perfectly in complete sentences.
It sounds like you have nothing to worry about. Your little boy will make up his mind to do it when he feels ready. Some kids just need to feel like they can do something WELL before they show what they can do.

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K.T.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son will be turning 18 months on the 16th and he only says a few things regularly [mama, up, no, hi, bye...and says one two-word phrase..."NO MAMA!!!"...screaming it over and over]. He also has said many more words one time and then never again. I think it is totally normal. Just keep repeating things even if you think he already knows.
I think part of it is building up the confidence to talk. It seems like when my son says something that sounds like gibberish, he stops trying because even he can recognize that he is not saying it like everyone else. And I agree with the last poster- I know what my son wants and usually give it to him before he attempts to say anything. Either that, or he just screams and points even though I know he could say what it is.
I certainly wouldn't call him a "late talker" because practically all the kids I have met under age 2 [in my family, my friend's kids, and at my sons daycare] don't say much at all. Especially the boys. It's frustrating... but so many people have told me, once they start talking they don't shut up! So enjoy the quiet while it lasts

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J.C.

answers from Des Moines on

My son was the exact same way. At his 18 month appt, I told the doctor that he was saying a few words but not as many as other kids his age. He totally understoond everything I say but wouldn't "talk on command."

My son is now 21 months and is talking quite a bit more. I just think he was a bit of a late talker. I think the bigger concern would be if he didn't understand what you were saying to him.

Thanks!

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J.L.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hi S.,

I have b/g twins that were very late talkers. They could understand language very well (follow 3 step directions) but only said minimal sounds (mama, dada, oma, opa). I called the local elementary school and was directed to Luthern Social Services (LSS). Once they turned 3 they were evaluated from the school and began speech services. Within months they were talknig in 4 and 5 words sentences. The speech teacher said that it was just a matter of time. Since the services are free, I would check them out. LSS actually came to my house to work with the children, and I know that the speech teacher would actually go to some of the students' daycares.
Good luck!
J. L

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L.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Many first children/only children are perfectionists. He is waiting until he can do it perfectly. My first child did that.

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J.R.

answers from Davenport on

If you want to communicate bwtter with him, maybe try starting baby signs, and saying the words for things he wants and having him repeat. For example: "Grunt( points at milk)" "Oh, you want some MILK? ( sign it as you say it) Can you say MILK?" If he signs or says milk, give it to him...try a couple times, for each item. We did this with my daughter and she was talking in sentences ( three words) by 1 year old, we started signing at 6 months.

I think signing opens up the same communication/speech pathways in the brian as spoken words, and I feel it helped my daughter to speak sooner, and better.

I would say, every time he asks for something have him repeat the word after you, and whenever you encounter a new item have him repeat it too.

Like others said it will come in time, but if you want to give hima little "push" that is what I would suggest!

Jess

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C.K.

answers from Des Moines on

Hi S.,

I take care of a little boy who will be 2 in August, and he doesn't say much of anything either. I'm like you though...I believe it is in there, and one day he will be talking a hundred words a minute. He understands everything I say to him, and follows instructions to the T. I've just never had one that is almost 2 say so few things. Everything else seems to be okay though, so I'm sure give them another few months, and we'll wish we hadn't said this.

C.

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T.M.

answers from Madison on

My son was 2 before he started talking we too knew that he could talk, he was saying a few words around 16 months, but then one day he just stopped all together, he just always got what he needed without having to ask for it. We finally started telling him we didn’t understand what he wanted and he would get really frustrated, but eventually he started talking and now at 3 we can’t get him to shut up – EVER, LOL.

Your son will talk when he’s ready to talk and you may need to push him a little bit like we did, but in the end you will probably be asking yourself the same question – Why were we in such a hurry for him to talk – j/k :)

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J.G.

answers from Waterloo on

S.,

As a speech-language pathologist, I recommend that any parents who have concerns share the information with their family physician and then ask for a referral to see a speech-language pathologist. Many families in Des Moines use ChildServe. In Iowa you can also go through the school district/AEA and they can screen your child to determine if a further evaluation is needed. Call your local school to find out who to contact for a speech-language screening for your 18 month old. If your child is a late-talker they'll let you know but if it's something more the speech-language pathologist will be able to offer recommendations &/or therapy.

There are several helpful books and websites about late talkers, speech-language delays and speech-language milestones. Here are a few of my recommendations (check your local library to see if they have a copy):
Beyond Baby Talk by Ken Apel and Julie Masterson
It Takes Two to Talk® — The Hanen Program® for Parents
American Speech-Language-Hearing Association website:
http://www.asha.org/public/speech/

Hope this helps!

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E.B.

answers from Duluth on

My first didn't talk much, but had more than a few words at 18 months (though not nearly what we thought he should) and now at 5, he has a great vocabulary, clear speech, and talks very easily. Our second is also a slower talker, and at 21 months has the 15 or so words the doc wanted him to have at his 18 month apt. If he has all the sounds, and the understanding is there, I wouldn't worry too much about it. Speech therapy via the schools (ie, free) is somewhat difficult to qualify for, and I don't think they even start to consider you until the child is like 2 1/2 or even 3. My MIL also thinks that if we made him work for it, he'd talk more, but what we know is that it also produces a million tantrums--which we wind up giving in to out of exhaustion! So, we try to meet in the middle, asking him to say more words but stopping before he hits the point of total frustration.

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S.

answers from Minneapolis on

S.:
While not talking at his age is common and having his own language is also common. I would suggest if you are truly concerned have him evaulated by your school district's early intervention program.

My son was a very late talker, he had his own language and used it all the time to communicate with us. I do not think he was not talking because we would get him things before he could ask, it was not that he was just "holding" out on us. We later learned he had the words in his head, but they just came out too fast and thus the words were all jumbled together.

He had two years of speech and started school without any issues last fall.

Do I think he would have talked on his own, yes in fact his number of words went up the week after we were evaluated, but he did benefit from the program and he did have issues with some sounds.

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T.T.

answers from Cedar Rapids on

Try sign language videos from Signing Time ( www.signingtime.com ).

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S.G.

answers from Rapid City on

He will talk that odd language when he isn't taking time to think about what he says. You can encourage it by pointing to pictures in books saying "what's that?" and seeing if he will say the words for you. My granddaughter was like this and all the sudden when she was about 26 months old she just started talking where we can understand her. She was like her father like that. My older kids started talking at 6 and 8 months so I was worried he had hearing problems. they say that usually kids will be really good with the verbal skills or be really good with the motor skills, but very unlikely be good with both at a young age. Sounds like your son is exellent on his motor skills.

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B.J.

answers from Rochester on

My fist was just like this as well. I was so worried about what he could and could not do. Now I know that they do things on THEIR time. My son now 5 never stops talking, but when he was little he would grunt or wine or point and we let him get away with it. When he was 2 we said enough was enough and we would not give him what he wanted unless he said the word. He pointed at the milk so I gave him juice. He was mad at first and then just gave up and suddenly all these words came out!!! don't worrie he will talk soon!

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D.D.

answers from Madison on

Have patience. His time will come when he spaeks very well. My 3 1/2 yr old was the same way and now he talks amazingly. My 19 month old is also the same way and he become a great mimmicker, also. Children do what they want, when they want.

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K.C.

answers from Madison on

See if you can get your pediatrician to refer you to
Birth - 3 for an assessment. It doesn't cost anything and will give you peace of mind. I wish I had done it much sooner.

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K.S.

answers from Cedar Rapids on

I am 100% on your level ... but I really am not too worried myself. (altho my MIL is very freaked out by it because her son spoke a billion words at 18 months)

But I have a question kind of along those lines ... my son knows a ton of sign language words. So whenever he wants something he'll just sign it ... do moms out there think that this is still ok? I feel like there is a lot of pressure about baby talking. But is signing acceptable as the same thing? My boy doesn't even say hi or bye or yes or no ... he just knows it all by signing. Should I be worried either?

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K.B.

answers from Duluth on

I completely know where you're coming from. My son had maybe a couple words at 18 months, and his pediatrician told me if he wasn't talking more soon we could start considering speech therapy, etc. I was also pretty convinced he'd just up and start talking, so I decided to wait until he was two to worry about it. And sure enough, by the time his two year appointment rolled around, we couldn't even count how many words he could say. I totally know how frustrating it is - but hang in there. My son has been the same way with all of these milestones: a lesson in patience. :)

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A.F.

answers from St. Cloud on

Hi S.! I don't think you have anything to worry about. My son didn't REALLY talk until he was 2 years old. He started by speaking in full sentences and never stopped. By the time he was 3 he had a better vocab and enunciation than some adults.
Our theory is that he didn't actually need to speak. We anticipated everything he needed before he had to ask. By comparison, our daughter spoke excellent full sentences by age 11 months. Every child is so different! I believe your instinct is correct. Soon your little one will be talking so much that you'll wonder why you worried! :)

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M.J.

answers from Green Bay on

Hi
What you need to do when you want him to say a certain word like thank you or any thing just keep saying it before you give him what he wants . If you know he can talk and he says words just work with him . I work in daycare and we start very young with just repeating a word like thank you when we give them some thing a toy a snack . Or please when we want some thing . I know it may seem like you say it a million times but when they say it is worth it . I think in any given day I may say please and thank you a million times . Any one who talks to him have them do the same . If Grandma wants him to say grandma have her say her name when he wants her . It works . I did it with both my kids I would just sit and talk to them and they picked up on it fast they were both early talkers because I would talk to them all the time .

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H.P.

answers from Milwaukee on

My son didn't really speak until 22-24 months. He is now 7. But by age 4hehad an extensive vocabulary and is extremely articulate. I just wanted to share because sometimes there is nothing wrong, it's just the kid's development and it's normal. I think my dr did indicate we would talk about it after he was 2.

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