Late for School EVERY Day!

I used to set a timer (a kitchen timer with the big knob would work) for my daughter at a couple different times durig the am. You could set it for being done with breakfast & brushing teeth, then another for being dressed.....
It seemed to get things going better for us & gave my daughter a sense of time.
We also still use the "bus is leaving in 10 (5 & 2) minutes" shout through the house most mornings. This one is great for the 2 yo. 2 times of having everyone walk out the door & get to the car before she's out of the house worked for her.

Hope it gets better. I know how frusterating it can be.

1 mom found this helpful

How frustrating!! You might try turning it into a game in the morning... use a wind up timer, give her a set amount of time to have her clothes on, teeth and hair brushed, etc. Find a reward that works - maybe a special treat in her lunch or for after school that she gets to pick out. You mentioned books... maybe a trip to the library at the end of the week if she's on time every day. Basically, find something that means a lot to her and will be a motivator. I have a 7 yr old step-daughter that takes absolutely forever to eat. The only thing that works for her is the threat of a spanking and to bed early. Find the motivation... good luck!!!

Our biggest dawdling problem is w/ shoes. So, I started keeping them in the car. No reason they can't ride in the car barefoot, and my 2 1/2 year old is buckled in when it comes time to put on shoes, so she can't "escape." (She's always perfectly willing to put on her crocks or sandals, but her school is a "tennis-shoes only zone.")

Get an earlier start and see if you can turn it into a race with a prize for the winner. It could be something special for a snack for school or after school. This may work. Good luck little one's have a mind of their own sometimes.

First of all...don't allow them to read books in the morning. If their clothes are already laid out they should dress, eat breakfast, brush teeth and hair, and then if there is time to spare they can look at a book or tv. Let that be the reward for being dressed on time.

I made a timeline of what to do in the morning and evening routine. This has helped care givers as well as my daughter get to it and she loves going step by step.
I took a picture of her at each step and mounted them on a peice of scrapbook paper in timeline fashion. Then I mounted it in the bathroom. It has helped move things along. If playing with toys is not on the list, then she can't do it. It was a fun way to include her in the process and make the whole thing more efficient. Since they are pictures, even your 2yr old can get it take part too. Good luck.

Could the 4yo be requiring so much hands-on assistance because she's jealous of the 2yo and wants Mommy to help her, too? Do you get to spend alone time with the 4yo, so she is more open to being "a big girl" before school? Do you require that she get herself ready on the weekends so that she'll be ready for it during the week?

I hate to sound too obvious, but is it possible to get up a little earlier? I'm a person who needs to set my alarm for about 30-45 minutes before I have to be up, so I can "snooze" to get myself stirring. I don't usually just pop out of bed. Even when I get up, I have to walk around and get myself going.

oh, I have bad news for you, A.! I still need to prod my 7 year old through the morning routine, even carrying him out of bed to the couch and practically dressing him some mornings! When I see him getting sidetracked I just say something like "oh, so you have your teeth brushed already?" and then he rushes back to do what he needs to before we leave for school. My main trick is getting my part of the morning rush done the night before: packing lunches, clothes set out, etc. Then I can concentrate on them in the morning, because they need it still! Hang in there!
P. (SAHM of three boys ages 7,5 & 3)

I would assume that you give baths the might before as well but you didn't mention it.
I don't have kids this age yet, but maybe you can make it into some sort of game for them-like who can get "________" done first (other than the eating part-we don't want anyone getting sick or choking!) and see if that works for the dawdling. They might quicken up a bit.

You could either have picture cards with each step and a magnetic board to put them on after they accomplish each task, or a sticker on a piece of paper with squares on it for each task. I don't think 4 is quite old enough to keep on task alone, but each child IS different. Once my son hit Kindergarten, if he wasn't ready, he went to school in his PJs. It only happened once and he was chastised by his classmates, so the threat was real and he KNEW it (but I discussed it with him the night before and we talked about how important it was to be on time and how rude and inconciderate it was for everyone else because of HIS interuption. How it made me feel, etc.

It's a bit intensive, but start directing them step by step at first. Have their clothes set out in the living room if they eat breakfast before changing into their school clothes. Don't give them a chance to dawdle or waste time by having them in your sight for right now. Make a point of everyone dressing, cleaning at the same time, so that you are together and can keep things going. As the routine settles in, your 4 year old will most likely get ready before the 2 year old. Once that happens, begin asking the four year old to "help" you with one aspect of getting the 2 year old dressed, like handing you an article of clothing, fastening a velcro tie, bringing you a brush, etc. Give the four year old the sense that she is taking over for you in that respect and she will start to see getting ready on time as a big girl responsibility she can help you with instead of just being told to get ready. Now she's looking out for her sibling, making sure they are ready to go after she is ready to go. Then the 2 year old can start "helping" as well.

Like I said, intensive, but if you've ever seen your normally dawdling child at school doing all the things that you wish they would do at home with the same kind of concentration, take a cue from the task/job assignment orientation that seems to work. I've got two attention deficit kids and the methods that emphasize progressive responsibility works as both lesson and reward.

Good Luck

Same problem here. I've started with a "schedule" of sorts. It just doing the same things in the same order everyday. OK, you finished breakfast? Now get dressed. OK. Shoes and socks? OK. Teeth. Ok. Hair. OK. Check backbacks. etc. Whatever order you decide. But, stick with it everyday. Then as you are walking around getting ready, then all you have to do is remind them to go to the next step. They know what comes next and just need to be reminded to do the next thing on the list. Same pattern every day. No books, no TV, no toys, until the list has been completed. Then, once completely ready early enough - books, TV, etc. are fine.

Hi A. -
First, I have 3 little boys to get to school, in addition to getting an infant, my husband, and myself out the door each morning, so I COMPLETELY understand your situation. I've done several things:
1. Get everything ready the night before
2. NO TV in the morning. Try tuning in to music with a good beat to it. They will move faster.
3. My kids must be fully dressed (including shoes), face washed, and hair brushed before they can come to the table for breakfast. (My kids LOVE food, so they tend to dress pretty quickly). This way if they go so slow where they don't get breakfast for a few days-that doesn't go over well with my kids. :-)
4. I use a timer for everything. I keep one in their bathroom and one in the kitchen. I tell them they have 5 min to brush teeth and wash face, and then I set the timer; 3 mins to finish eating, and set the timer etc. This helps them get the feel of what 5 or 10 mins feels like as well as knowing when it's time to move on to something else.

I hope this helps you.

On another note, I see you are a part-time bookkeeper. I'm seriously considering becoming a bookkeeper so I can work from home. I'd really appreciate any advice you could offer, such as where you got your training etc. I have a BA in Marketing, but I've been working in Finance for the past 3 years. I'm a certified commerical credit analyst, so I have quite a bit of knowledge around financial statements. I'm missing the payroll skill set and need to brush up on my journal entry process. Any information you could provide would be quite helpful. Thanks

The only thing that has worked for me is to "pretend" that we have to be there 30 minutes earlier than we actually do. And I've heard of people fining themselves/rewarding themselves if they end up being early (so the focus isn't on the deadline but before the deadline, just to be on the safe side). It's easy for some people to be on time, but it's always been very hard for me, so i wish you godspeed in changing this habit. I totally empathize! Good luck.

Maybe have them help out so it doesn't take as long to get ready--getting dishes or food out for breakfast, getting anything they need to take with them to school, etc. Also maybe you could try telling them that they can play or read only after they are ready to go, or that they can take a book or toy in the car with them. Good luck!

I'd get your 4 yr old up 30 minutes earlier than normal and ask her to dress herself. Be patient, but consistent, she'll get quicker at it. Also, is it possible for your husband to help get the kids moving?

Maybe your just not allowing them enough time, try getting everyone up 15-30 minutes sooner, till you get the routine down and everyone can meet the walk out the door mark!

My boys are 2.5 and 5 yrs. They respond very well to a check list and/or a picture schedule. At first I used pictures of THEM eating, washing and getting dressed. Then I shifted to more abstract, generic pictures of someone eating, etc. that I found at do2learn.com. I put the pictures prompts in order vertically (first task on top). When we are done with each task, my son removes the picture (which is velcro-ed on a white board) and we move on to the next task. If, along the way, he stops to play, I also have a picture for "play," which I show him and say "no playing, time to wash" or whatever, along with the corresponding picture. Or I put the play picture on the schedule at the end, so he knows that he can do it soon.
The older son just likes to make a check mark on his list as he gets each task done. The reward is that he does have time to play when everything is done on time.
Also, offering choices (which task to do first, which shirt to put on, etc.) has been motivating. I should mention that both boys are on the autistic spectrum, so it might sound like I'm going overboard....good luck!

I haven't read all the responses but I have a 5 YO 4 YO 3 YO and 18 month old and I'm pregnant...it takes forever to get our in the mornings! Forget school- that's never going to happen for us! Homeschooling all the way...

Anyway, have you considered making a morning chart? It can have pictures like clothing , hair brush , bowl of cereal , toothbrush , backpack pic, ect so she knows step by step what needs to be done. if it's laminated she could write a check by each one with a crayon or write and wipe marker. OR use a clothes clip to move down to the next step.

;0) hope it helps.
S.

I've never tried this myself, but read it in a magazine and thought it was a great idea. Burn a cd or make a playlist of songs that the kids like and play it every morning while the kids are getting ready. Different points on the playlist should be clues to them as to what they should be doing at that time. Ex. Song number 1, they should be waking up and getting out of bed, song 2-getting dressed, etc. By the end of the playlist, they should have their routine finished and be ready to go. Makes it a little like a game.
Like I said, I've never tried it myself, so if you do, let us know if it works.

I have 3 girls, 11, 9 and 4, so I have totally been there! One thing my husband has always found to be helpful is to turn everything into a race (I'll bet you can't put your shoes on by the time I count to 10! Ready? 1, 2, 3...). But, I know when my two older ones were your little ones' ages, I couldn't rely on them to do anything on their own. I had to push them along the entire way. Consequently, we were frequently late! I did find that we did better when I got up earlier and got myself ready before getting them up. So, it just depends which one is more important...your own sleep, or being on time! If you have a job outside the home then it is obvious which is more important. I am fortunate to be a SAHM so it isn't the end of the world to be late for preschool. Try not to fret too much...as they get older they do SO much more...my 11 and 9 year olds are almost completely self-sufficient now! Good luck!

I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old.
I get up first and get completly ready - make lunches and then I get my 6 year old up. While she is going to the bathroom and brushes her teeth, I get the 3 year old up. Dress him and set him in the living room with a milk. I go back to the 6 year old, do hair.
We all get our shoes out and grab backpacks - breakfast is to go.
whew! Thats mornings around here. I get up at 5:30 to get everyone out by 7:10.
As they get older... they do more. Till then, its all you.
Good luck.
T.

At their ages, they don't have a concept of time yet. 20 minutes can go by and it feels like 2 minutes. First, get them up earlier and get them started on getting ready for school earlier, so that you won't feel rushed and stressed if they dawdle. Second, set a timer that they can watch as the time ticks down (basically a kitchen timer), and let them know that there will be consequences if they are not ready for school by the time the buzzer rings. It is essential that you follow through with consequences (maybe they have to start earlier the next day, or maybe they don't get to do something they wanted to do later that day). The younger one may not be ready for this, but the older one should be able to handle it.

Yes, walk them both through the daily routine. Be very strict about it. Put a couple of books in the car that they can read while on the way to school. Girls can be a little more of a hassle cause you have to fix their hair. My suggestion would be to allow your 4 year old to brush her teeth, wash her face, ect while you are doing the two year olds hair. Then you can easily fix the 4 year olds hair and go over the teeth and face quickly as a follow up. Allowing her to get the start of being independent will show her you trust her, plus before long she will be doing it on her own and the way you want it to be done.

By the way, the TV, books and toys are a no-no in the AMs. That is an after school treat, if there is no homework to be done, which yours may not have yet. But, instead of homework, it can be a set reading time, which would help get them ready for kindergarten. That time will turn into homework time. Also, another time saver, get yourself ready before the kids get up. This will prevent them having free time to get into anything. So, once you are ready, you get them through their routine, its time to head out to the car on time:)

I was right there with you. I have 2 girls--7 and 4, and last year my oldest was in double digits for tardies! This school year, we definitely get clothes ready the night before which has helped quite a bit, but my oldest still has issues...so now, as she dwadles, I tell her I'm leaving in 5 or 10 minutes, whichever it may be and she can go to school in her pj's. Once she knew I was serious, this worked great. Good luck!

Get them up a little later and if they dress themselves then you make breakfast while they get dressed. Once they are dressed they are to come to the table for breakfast and so on. Once they are finished with one task it is time to do another. Give them chores to do. If you have a pet make it their job to feed the pet. They aren't too young to help out and if they have a job to do then they may be eager to get it done. This schedule seems to work with my son. He usually only has between 25-35 minutes from the time I wake him up to the time we are walking out the door and in that time he dresses himself, brushes his teeth, comes down to eats breakfast (away from a lot of toys), gets his school bag together and feeds the dog. I also allow about a 15 minute time frame incase we are running a little slow in the morning but enough that we would still be on time. You'll most likely have to stay on top of them for a week or so to get them in the routine but once they are in it they will be used to it. Have books in the car that they know they will get to read once they get in the car. Hope this helps.
M.

what if you let them sleep in the clothes their gonna wear the next day?

A.,

Wake them up 30 minutes earlier than usual. Tell them the night before that tomorrow they have to get up in the dark because they aren't getting ready for school on time. I personally don't think a 4 year old can get ready by herself. However, I have 3 sons and I'm sure girls are different:)

Peace,
C.

Check this out!!! It is awesome. My kids love it. I don't have to do a THING except press the play button and make breakfast.
http://www.childrensmiraclemusic.com
A.

My kids are also two and four! I value my sleep, so I can't tell you to get up earlier although I am sure that is the first thing most people would suggest.

The most important thing...get them out of their room or the playroom as soon as you can so there is no playing. I have my little ones get up to the table as soon as they get out of bed. (I don't dress them until after breakfast to prevent spills and changing.)

So I get up a bit before them to start making breakfast. This may be where you get distracted, so try to simplify that for yourself too. Instant oatmeal, scrambled eggs and pre-made pancakes (I just make extra batches on the weekends then freeze them and microwave each pancake for 30 seconds to a minute), my kids like instant grits with an over-medium fried egg cut up in it...these things don't take long (nor do poptarts and cereal which we may have once a week).

As the breakfast is cooking, I go in and get them up and to the table. I am there to help feed them if they get pokey. I only feed them meaning I say open your mouth and stuff whatever in. (Other meals they only eat by themselves, doing this at breakfast keeps me from having to shout at them to hurry up.)

Then we go in and my four-year old starts getting dressed in the "layed out clothes" and I dress the two year old, then do the shoes and socks of the four year old, brush hair, grab the backpacks that are sitting by the front door and out the door we go. I also tell them that they can grab one toy to take out the door with them, but only if they are doing what they are supposed to as we get ready. Hope some of these tips will work for you...good luck.

Sit down with the four-year-old and tell her that because she's the big sister, she will get to help you make a School Day Chart. Cut pictures from magazines, or take pictures of her actually doing the things that need to be done before she's ready to leave each day. Download the pictures and paste on a big poster board in the order in which you want her to get ready. Make squares that she can "check off" when she has accomplished something for each day; you know, Monday, Tuesday, etc. You might want to give her some stickers to use for that. Just be sure she knows that she can't put a sticker when the chore isn't finished.

This gives her something concrete to look at and helps her break down her morning routine into easy steps. Be sure to highly praise her when she performs well, and gently encourage when she gets side-tracked. You might want to decide on a treat she can earn at the end of the week when she has so many stickers/check-marks. (Like take her to the neighborhood park or go get an Icee or something like that--Anything that will help motivate her to succeed. I prefer to make the reward a privilege of some sort instead of something to eat. Don't want to start eating as a reward!)

I used this method with my mentally-handicapped son when he was trying to learn to dress himself in the mornings. If he can learn it--anyone can! Now he's 26 and almost self-sufficient getting ready. Just needs help putting on his watch.

Hope this helps!

S.