Last Feeding Confusion

You don't have to feed him between 9PM and 5 or 6AM? Wow! Wish my kids slept like that at 4 months!

I think you are doing everything just right. Does he start to surface from sleep for that 9PM feeding? If not now, he will sometime soon as that gets to be his routine.

The medical community is unambiguous about solid foods. Every medical organization recommends that a child be EXCLUSIVELY breastfedfor the first six months,so no water, no cereal, no nothing except Mama's yummy milk. Following this advice can greatly benefit your son's health both in the short term and for the duration of his life. Another 8 weeks of letting him be a baby isn't too hard is it?

Can you figure out a way of giving him his tub in the morning when he gets up early? Then you wouldn't have to wake him for that. I know you probably want to spend more'awake time' with him when you get home, but that will happen soon enough as he needs less sleep.

Maybe nursing him at the breast for that last feeding would work for you, too. As you probably know, a pump will never be as efficient as your baby at extracting milk from your breasts and keeping up your supply. Maybe he wouldn't be as upset at being awakened if he has Mum's body to soothe him.

Best luck...sounds like you're doing the right things and asking the right questions.

2 moms found this helpful

Let the poor baby sleep. Skip that last feeding, he doesn't seem to need it. I know he may get up earlier on the other end but there are ways to get around that. If he's waking up at 4 am, I would try to do whatever I could get him to go back to sleep. It may take him a few days to get use the new schedule but I'm sure he'll adjust(during that time it will suck for you because you'll be getting up with him and not getting sleep)

Hi M.,
Sounds like Evan knows what he wants. And even if he wakes at 4am or earlier, that's a great stretch for a 4-month-old. I wouldn't even bother with the cereal, especially if he's not interested. Also, bath time could really be any time of day. After 6 babies, if there's one thing I've realized, it's that we're all happier taking cues from baby, even though it's not necessarily the easiest or most desirable schedule for me. In the long run it works out better. But then, just when you get it all figured out, you have another, totally different child, and you learn everything all over again. We're getting ready to do it all again in May. Enjoy the adventure! Sounds like you're doing great.

Have you tried to just not wake him at all and just see how long he will sleep on his own? He might be okay through the night until the morning. ???? You might want to try it to save him some aggrevation from being woken up. And he might surprise you. If not, then just keep doing what you're doing. If he gets used to not having the other feeding, I'll bet he will sleep right through it and won't even miss it. And don't feel like you'll be depriving him food - believe me - if he needs it or is hungry - as I am sure you know - he will LET YOU KNOW!! :)

You are very lucky! My 4 month old daughter has been waking up for the last month at 3 AM for a feeding no matter what time her last feeding was. I thought it was a growth spurt, but since it has continued I guess it is a habit. Ugh!!! Have you tried feeding him at 9 without waking him up? I usually gently get my daughter out of the crib around 11 without her waking up and breastfeed her. She will nurse for sometimes ten minutes and then really drops off into sleep and I slip her back into her crib. I read in one of the books that you could do this without burping because they usually don't take in much air in that state. Hope this helps. Good luck!

I personally wouldn't wake him up for the last feeding. Let him sleep and awake whenever he will do so. He will get used to not having the last feeding if you do this...eventually. If you have to wake him up for the feeding instead of him waking up for it, he might not entirely want it, he may take it but that doesn't mean that he needed/wanted it. I would try not waking him up for that last feeding, see how that goes. It's not unusual for kids to go to bed around 7-7:30 and sleep through the night or at this age he may wake up in the middle of the night (not ideal) but at least you wouldn't have to wake him up to have him cranky for his last feeding. Good luck.

Hi M.,

Good job on the waiting of introduction of food to him. He's too young. I know some experts say 4-6 months but I'd wait till 6 mo. Just my opinion. I have a 7 mo and I waited till he was 6 mo and my daughter who is now 4 yo I introduced at 5 1/2 mo.

Anyway, the general rule of thumb is to let your baby tell you when their hungry. That way they're continually trusting themselves to eat when they have to because they're hungry. I know you've mentioned he'll sleep later through the night if you feed him at a certain time. I'd wait till he wakes up to feed him. I know it's a pain having him wake up so early in the morning but it doesn't last long, really. Plus it's a great incentive for you to go to bed early then you won't be so tired when he does wake up.
This phase shall pass quickly. Enjoy him while he's so little.

E. P.

I think if its working for you then keep it up because you can get some sleep. I would pick my daughter up at 10 and feed her asleep and she would sleep until 7 the next day. If you want to keep trying the cereal maybe around the 6pm feeding you could give it a shot. If he starts eating it then he might get full and not need the 9pm feeding to make it through the night. I will tell you it is trial and error and the schedule always seems to change. It sounds like you are doing great and just trust your own instincts because you know your baby the best.

Sweetie,

You are so blessed to have a baby who is already sleeping so well! Congratulations!

I bf my 19 month old until he weaned himself at a year.

My personal feeling is to keep waking him for only the bottle at 9. (I wouldn't drop this feeding as he probably needs it.) I always felt like I needed to give my son a bath and my husband was very insistent that if he was in charge of cleaning it was going to happen in the shower. So, my son even now gets a lot of his cleaning in the shower in the morning. Interestingly, when he wakes up with a super wet diaper (or a messy one) or needs his nose unplugged during cold season, the shower is such a nice option. He loves it and one of the best benefits is that my son has learned not to mind water on his face or head.

As for food, whenever is convenient is the best time to give it to him. I didn't find that food helped him sleep until he was eating all three meals and that's not really your concern anyway.

Enjoy this time, M., it goes so fast!!!

;o)

never wake a sleeping baby. K.

It made me smile to read your post! :) I remember how delicate all that is. it sounds like you have it right and can see what will work best for him and your schedule. But, what I can add is that, for me, every time I just got it 'right', the baby would go through a growth spurt or something and there we would be again having to work out something that would work for us! Just stick with what is working for you, sounds like he is a great sleeper which is so nice!

Hi there ,
One word of advise my mom gave me is never wake a sleeping baby. He'll wake up when he is hungry. Babies schedule change every few months as they grow and finally sleep longer. I used to give my daughter her last bottle around 6:30 so she would be asleep by 7:00 pm I would add a little cereal to the bottle and she would sleep really good. Sometimes giving them more through out the day helps them sleep better after the last bottle of the day. She did sometimes wake up around 2:00 and then it would be around 4-5 am.
their is hope.
Good Luck!! MMM

Hi M.,

I know how hard a breastfeeding and sleep schedule is. I nursed 2 babies. I think that if he'll sleep from 9 pm - 5 am or so, it's worth waking him up for the 9 pm feeding. You need all the sleep you can get. I've heard it called a "dream feeding" just wake him up enough to nurse and put him back to bed. Maybe try the cereal earlier in the evening - like at dinner time and try giving him a bath at another time during the day or earlier in the evening rather than get him all riled up at 9 at night. Hope this help.

Jen

If it works for him and you, keep doing it!!! My baby didn't eat much for her whole first years, don't worry, he's young. Your schedule sounds like a dream to me. I think I would find another time for bath though....

Good luck!
S.

I would feed him "dinner" of cereal just before/after you breast feed him at 6pm. This will make it easier to transition to a normal family routine when you all eat dinner together. I would keep putting him down at 7 or 7:30pm- this is normal bedtime for kids that age. Then wake him up to breast feed him when you go to bed- as late as you can (I usually do 10-11pm) and my son barely wakes up, but can nurse while they are still practically asleep so they get the milk. This helps my son get all the way through the night, and eventually people tell me you can phase out the last night time feed. This way you are not trying to feed him cereal when he really just wants to sleep and you get enough nutrition in him that he sleeps well afterwards. Hope this helps!

Maybe you should check with your pediatrician. Mine told me I could stop waking my daughter to eat after one month-she is now 4 months old and takes her last bottle around 7pm. We're very lucky - she'll sleep until about 5:30am. She goes right to sleep after her last bottle. Perhaps you should do the cereal feeding at 6:00pm.
Just a thought.

I'd say you're in good shape; it sounds like the 9:00 feeding is/was working for you. With my son, I routinely got him up for a "dreamtime" feeding when I went to bed, and he barely woke up for those. I fed him in his room, with little light and no talking, and it was non-disruptive to his sleep but bought me the rest of the night to slumber. Your little guy's sleeping through very well already!

Best of luck,
C.

M.,
It lookes like your son has a good schedule. If your son will eat if you wake him up at the 9pm feeding, then I would continue waking him up. I wake my 3 month old daughter up for a 10 pm feeding. She eats and goes right back to sleep. This way I can get some sleep without worrying about what time she'll wake up in the middle of the night. I kind of think of the schedule as..."If it isn't broken...don't fix it." Keep up the good work.

One thought I had is to see if he'll eat this other feeding at some other time during the day like maybe one between the 10am and 2pm and then let him just go to sleep at 7:30 for the night. Eventually he'll grow out of waking up too early. Also at some point (i can't remember exactly when), he'll start taking 2 naps instead of 3 and then hopefully he'll sleep a nice long night. I would also probably wait a little longer before really starting the rice cereal especially if he's not interested.
It's hard to wake up and feed him in the middle of the night or 4 am, but as long as he goes back to sleep, and if you know it's temporary, then maybe it could be okay until the next change/stage. I always felt like as long as they weren't up at 4 for the day, then i could handle that. hope you found some things helpful.

Try to stretch the last feeding until 7:30 before he gets exhausted and fussy. Feed him, then put him down for the night. I wouldn't wake him after that to feed him. I was told never to wake a sleeping baby at night. Try to give him the cereal at 6:00 to hold him over until the last milk feeding at 7:30. He is still young for the cereal, so it's ok if he is not interested. Good luck!

I wouldn't wake him up. Let him wake himself when he's hungry. I'd also back off of the cereal. . he's only 4 months old.

M.

Keep up the good work. If he sleeps until 5-6 in the AM when you wake him up to feed him at 9 then I say keep doing it it's working well. You could try letting him go and see if he makes it through the night then he'll just make it up by taking more in each feeding. As they grow their stomachs are more able to handle larger feedings, but if he lasts only to 2, 3, or 4 in the morning then I would continue with what you are doing you need your sleep too and a happy mommy makes a happy baby! It's okay if he needs to be awakened. If you wake him later he might be so rested you won't be able to get him back to sleep. Right now it sounds like you have him on a really good schedule. As he gets older he will sleep less and you will probably have to readjust but for now enjoy the good nights sleep!

J. L.

If you are waking a sleeping baby to feed him, you are feeding him when he is NOT HUNGRY! This is a bad precedent to set as overfeeding can lead to confusion about hunger and fullness as he gets older. Breast milk is the best food for your son at this point, and any other foods are un-necessary. My oldest is 20 years old this year. I woke him to feed him exactly once. He vomited all over me and I was cured of ever waking a sleeping child. If you let him sleep, he will wake up when he is hungry. A schedule is for your convenience, not his benefit. BTW, I applaud you for taking the route of breastfeeding your child. It is the best food for him, and the nurturing closeness it builds helps your baby to feel secure.

don't wake him.. he's trying to learn to sleep longer! loosen up on the schedule a little.. I"m all for schedules, but too rigid isn't good either. you'll probably find that he'll go a little longer at night and during the day want more at those feedings he's not taking a whole lot.

My daughter was bottle fed - and i was going back to work at 10 weeks. she was on a similar schedule - 2/6/10 AM and PM. between the 6 and 10PM bottles she would nap. it started off like 7-9.... then slowly grew shorter. if she wasn't up by 10PM we would wake her up, change her diaper etc - to get her awake - then she'd get her last bottle and then she'd be down for the night.

when i started to go back to work - i made some rice ceareal in a bowl - you know the litle baby rubber tipped feeding spoons - i would give her 4-6 1/2 scoops of the oatmeal cereal - i would put it in her mouth -and then put the bottle right in and she'd suck it down. every couple of days we'd add another spoon. by 12 weeks she was sleeping from 10PM ot 6AM - and we'd be getting up at 6 anyways for work.

it also helped her when she was ready for baby food - she was already pretty good at swallowing - if you're unsure of that you can always put the rice right in the bottle.

slowly that nap would creep up and evenutually once it gets around 8PM.... we had to really occupy her between 6-8PM and and keep her up - and then give her the oatmeal and last bottle at 8 and she would go through the night. that was at about 6-8 months where that night time nap was completely cut out.

Hi M. - Wow - speaking of confusion! I apologize, but your request was really confusing too...!

Anyway, I am an older mother with a pre-teen, so my breast feeding days are long behind me. But I do know 2 things:

Babies bodies and digestive systems are not ready for any solid food until they are six month old... And secondly, just feed him at his own schedule. He'll eat when he is hungry - though maybe not when it's always convenient.

This will change also. He'll grow up and out of nighttime feedings altogether and you'll miss those quiet moments of snuggling in dark and quiet night with your little bundle.

My best advice is to run, not walk, to a bookstore or Amazon and get yourself the book, "Your Baby and Child" by Penelope Leach.

There's no better book out there. It's real english and basically tells you to relax and listen to what your child is asking for. (NO - it is impossible to spoil an infant!)

Good luck. Happy reading!

It sounds like you've gotten lots of good advice...I just wanted to respond to the comment that 17 weeks is too early for solids. This comes directly from the American Academy of Pediatrics: "There is a difference of opinion among Academy experts on this matter [of when to introduce solids]. The Section on Breastfeeding supports exclusive breastfeeding for about six months. The Committee on Nutrition supports the introduction of complementary foods between four and six months of age where safe and nutritious complementary foods are available."

That said...I personally found that it was easy to tell when my son was ready to start solids (around 5 months old). I had planned to wait longer, but we began to notice that his sleeping through the night was shorter and he was evidently hungry. Once we started with a little cereal, his sleeping patterns returned to normal. Also, when introducing solids -- remember, always introduce them early in the day. And being as young as he is, I would only give them once a day, if you decide to continue with the cereal at this point. By the way, while we were still doing a 9-10 pm feeding with my son, we had to wake him for it. Since he's still only sleeping until 5 am, I'd continue waking him for the last feeding until he starts sleeping a bit later in the morning. Don't worry about trying to wake him up completely -- wake him just enough to "sleep eat" through his bottle and put him right down after.