Language Development

Hi K.!

Children DO NOT learn language from watching TV (of any kind). You have probably noticed he watches your mouth when you talk to him. This is how children learn how to move their own mouths to make the sounds of our language. TV is not 3D and can't give children the same oppurtunity. Along with this, children need to hear words over and over. Using parellel, self and stretch talk techniques will always help him learn language. Sounds to me like he does understand the language in your home just not so much willing to express his own words, yet. What language does your Au Pair speak? If her English is not good, I would recommend she speak to him in her own language. Your son's brain is very willing and able to sort through the different language sounds. I think it would be better for him to hear her talking (even in a different language...which he will pick up himself) then to have her not speaking at all or incorrectly. Otherwise, continue with talking to him as much as possible. Professionally I can tell you, at 19months, you should hear about 6 different words (according to the Denver II Developmental Screening). Personally, I would just hang in there and see what happens for the next couple months.

Good luck!
Terri

1 mom found this helpful

Hi K.,
I haven't read all the responses you received but my son is 19 months old and has just started repeating the words we say one month ago. In my own experience, I've noticed girls developing mych quicker in this area. Hope that makes you feel better:)

I would be a bit concerned at this stage of you child's development. Although having an older sibling may cause language delays in children (i.e.-the older child speaks for the younger child). When I taught pre-school many years ago we had siblings (2 boys-ages 1 1/2 and 2 1/2) who attended. They had a nanny in the home who spoke little or no english. The parents were concerned that the boys weren't speaking so they enrolled them full time in pre-school. It was apparent from the beginning that something was "wrong". The pediatrician was the one who recommended pre-school to the parents. And after many trip to the pediatrician and many meeting with the parents, they were finally given an evaluation. Turns out the boys were autistic. These boys lost a lot of their language development in those early years. they are doing well now, but it was a lot of hard work on the parents. I would insist on some sort of evaluation. Its better to be safe than sorry. Good luck

I doubt the au pair is a problem. Some say that edu videos actually delay language development. (But I doubt that would cause a great delay.) I suggest you get him evaluated by your early intervention agency. Speech therapy might help. Check out: http://www.elwyn.org/ECS/SEEDS_Philadelphia

Best wishes!

I wouldn't consider it a problem at this point. He probably just has no need to talk. That is common in second and third and so on, children. If he gets what he wants without asking for it, there is no need to ask. If the need,or want to talk arises, he will talk more. I wouldn't worry about your au pair, he will only learn more from having her around. Give him some time. You could also get him some language toys to play with, for encouragement.

Sounds like you have a very smart little one. How about reading to him. The videos aren't going to leave the impression that reading would. Since the au pair isn't going to do it you may have to. But take advantage of her language and let him learn two. That is a a good thing. He is at a great age to teach two languages, even if you may have to learn too. But don't worry he will speak english by the time he starts school. Just keep talking he is listening.

I'm sure there is no medical basis for this, but my observation with my own kids as well as other people's kids is that they either develop early in speech/commmunication OR physical skill..not usually both! My first son who was VERY good at climbing, walking, and all physical coordination developed his speech late. My other son spoke early and very clear but was not as physically coordinated. At 5 1/2 and 7, they are both at the same level for each skill.
Also, younger children speak later due to the fact that they have older siblings who do all the talking for them!

My son has always been advanced in his physical development, but not in language. He is 23 months now and things started to click about 2 months ago - now he never stops talking. I just figured that he was busy learning to walk, run, jump, climb, throw, etc... and didn't have time to focus on talking. If you are concerned, you could talk to your doctor.

hey kelley this sounds just like my daughter. Dont be worried about his development. Each kid is different in how they develop and honestly from what ive seen working in the school system they all catch up by the time they are 5. My daughter is the same as your son she walked at 9 m. Very physical and smart yet had no interest in really talking. My daughter is 3 and just learned her ABC'S but my son learned them at 14 months. Now that she is 3 I see a huge change in her. She all of a sudden knows colors, numbers and letters. Its like she just didnt have time for that stuff. All she wanted to do was play. So my advice is dont worry. Your son will be fine. If you notice anything specific that really bothers you def. follow your gut but it sounds like he's fine :)

My oldest son was not speaking at 19 months and our pediatrician (who was very cautious) referred us to an early intervention program. It was great. They came to our house once a week and it really helped. We never knew if it was developmental or if the outside help did the trick,but he started speaking quickly. We loved it. It was free and they came to our house. We were living in TX at the time, but there has to be a simiiar early intervention program in every state. Good luck!

I would have a speech therepist evaluate him if you are worried at all. They will help ease your mind. My son has a speech delay and is currently seeing a speech therepist. He was always great with his receptive language like your son, but not as great with his expressive. My daughter is the same as your daughter....she says everything and she is not even two. Some kids just take a little longer to talk. I have many friends who started speech with their kids at 18 mos. I'm sure he is totally fine, but it doesn't hurt to do an evaluation. Don't worry!

Both of my children had limited vocabularies until their second birthdays. Prior to their 2nd birthdays, our pediatrician told us to make note of other language skills - following simple directions, facial expressions, body language, etc. She explained that since my kids used a lot of energy doing physical things, playing with toys and exploring that the language skills took a backseat. Now at 2 1/2 and 3 1/2 they seem to be on track with their language development....and they won't stop talking. LOL

My 19 month old only says about 10 words if that. You can talk to his ped. and they can give you the # of usually a county run speech therapist...they come out to the house for free to evaluate him. {ours was the Lenape Valley Foundation} They told us she was perfectly fine after they spend about an hour and a half with her. As long as all other areas are up to par, try not to worry too much.

Soon enough, you won't be able to keep him quiet! lol Good luck :]

You could be talking about my son. Very physically advanced (I hear you about the throwing arm. We've had to hide all hard plastic balls.), but wanted nothing to do with talking. Just after he turned 1 he had the few expected words -- ball, cat, baba -- but at 15 months he completely stopped talking. He would follow directions and point at things, but wouldn't say a word. At 20 or 21 months, he all of a sudden started talking. Each day he added a new word and his sentences started getting longer. Now, at 30 months, he talks better than some 3 and 4 yr olds I know. Of course we thought we always think we're being "1st time parents" with the perfect child until we take him out in public. Everyone says he speaks really well for his age. So my point is, let him take his time. The docs told us that when Owen was finished accomplishing the big things, the little stuff would take care of itself. You keep talking to him and exposing him to language. He'll pick it up. Eventually he'll want to get his opinion across over his talkative sis!

Good luck!
T.

Ok, well, first I want to say that physical development and speech development don't necessarily go at the same pace...at 19 months he should have *some* language but this is also at an age when some do, some don't. There is an Early Intervention program in both Allegheny County and Butler county that will come to your home and do a speech evaluation at no charge to you. You can also ask your pediatrician for a script for a speech evaluation and do it out patient. There are several facilities that can do this, including Children's.

Go with your gut. This is the biggest guide you can have. If you really feel concerned, push for the eval because children with delays of any kind make THE MOST progress before three years of age...and while he's only 19 months, the next year and a half will go very quickly...when you do find out for certain if there is a delay, you will want to act on it by including Early Intervention Speech Therapy or out patient Speech Therapy for him. (though Health Insurance normally only pays for limited sessions so Early Intervention is the best option normally...weekly sessions or more based on your child's needs at no charge to you. We've been in Early Intervention for several years so I'd be willing to discuss this more! ____@____.com

Good luck!

K.
Your son sounds just like mine. We actually looked into speech therapy but the therapist felt there was nothing wrong and it would come in time. He didn't say his first word until 19 months. By his 2nd birthday he was coming along and putting two words together but I was usually the only one who could understand what he was saying. He is now 2 and half and is still behind the other children his age but is making an effort to repeat everything and putting 4-5 words together.Some of the phenetics still aren't perfect. I honeslty think they will do it in their own time and there isn't anything you are not already doing. I wouldn't worry until he goes to pre school and then let them refer you if needed. good luck!
J. Z

I wouldnt be suprised if he can speak the same language as your au pair! If shes with him most of the day do you think she finds it easier to converse with him in her own language? My son had to be evaluated becuase at 2yo he couldnt put two or three words together. We read books every day as often as possible and for me that helped him catch up. Your son should be starting to pair words together and should have more in his vocabulary than yes or no. As for your daughter, speaking in sentances before one is very advanced. Supposedly boys develop slower in this area and if your child is turning out bilingual it will slow his progress a little more. I would talk to your doctor about it next time you see him which should be 24 months. If your still unsettled I would call and make an appiontment sooner.

Do not worry! My son is 23 months and still saying very little. Boys naturally develop language later than girls. In addition, my son was crawling/walking when yours was and my doctor insists that early crawling/walking is directly associated with late talking. At our 18 month visit, the doctor was in the room for not even a minute when she said "let me guess, he is not talking yet". In that span of time, he had managed to climb from the floor onto the exam table and then from there onto a chair (not even close to the table)! They consider it time to get help if they are not talking by 2.5/3. The important thing is that they understand and respond. The verbal skills will come. I have lots of friends with 2 year olds and there is really a range of speaking abilities and my/your son really is not even in the minority!

Here is a link to a page on the American Speech-Language-Hearing Association website. It breaks down skills by age-group. There is also information there about learning two languages.

http://www.asha.org/public/speech/development/chart.htm

I think contacting early intervention to get an evaluation for your son would be a good thing. As a pediatric speech-languge pathologist, I frequently find that if a parnet is conserned, there is reason for it. At 19 months, you should be hearing at least a few words.

I have the same fears about my son and have asked doctors and other mothers. What I have learned is something that we all know and forget. Every child is different and they all devolp differently. My son and daughter followed the same line it sounds like your children have. My daughter is still very advanced in her speech, she just likes to talk. And my son still has no interest in talking. Each chold focuses on a different skill at different times. Our sons are so focused on thier physical skills. The voice will come later. While I was asking around I found out that I did much the same thing. I knew quite a few words and then I just stopped speaking for about six months. When my mother asked our doctor about it he said that I was focused on learning other skills and not to worry. Sure enough I started talking again, and when I did it was in full sentences.
So long story short as long as he's devolping and learning, he's fine. Ask your doc if your worried but it sounds like he'll be just fine.

I'm sure others have already addressed the most obvious here in that boys and girls are *vastly* different, especially when it comes to verbal expression. This continues throughout their entire lives - I think I read somewhere that women use, on average, 30,000 words per day and men use, on average, around 5,000. I don't recall the exact numbers, but it was something that dramatic, literally.

I have nothing but boys, but I remember having the same fears with my oldest son because I have a niece who is 3 weeks older than him. She was full of chatter, make-believe, dialogue, etc. at the earliest possible stages while my son was nearly mute. I even mentioned it to my pediatrician b/c I was so concerned. Turns out, he's still a boy of few words - he's 13 now and an honor student. He, like your son, understood everything I said which you should take as a comfort - if he didn't understand you, that would be cause for genuine concern.

Hang in there and maybe consider reading the book "Bringing up Boys" by Dr. James Dobson. It's a real eye opener for us mommies with sons!

It's actually very common for babies to develop more quickly in one area and lag behind in another. My son was advanced in his intellectual skills but lagged behind in his motor skills. He started crawling and walking later than other babies but started talking and doing other amazing things early. I wouldn't worry too much about it. The most important thing is that he is a happy baby. It's also very common that babies that are in two language homes learn to talk later b/c they are picking up both languages. I know a speech therapist and she says it's not a bad thing. I would talk to your doctor at your next visit but I wouldn't worry about it.

If you are worried, seek early intervention to have the child screened and it will put your mind at ease.

Every child developes differently, so ask the professionals.

Good Luck

Hmm. Sounds like he is developing at his own rate . I have 4 girls . My oldest was my only one to speak full sentences by the time she was one . After that the other girls just didn't feel the need to speak , as big sis did alot of speaking . Boys are also slower to pick up speech and are more physical and active then girls are . That is for sure . My sister has two sons and I can see the BIG difference between boys and girls in that respect .

The experts say that videos don't do much for young children . Is it at all possible to find an English speaking au pair ? Or actually even better, create your own group that you can get together with on a time of the week that is convienent for you . I'm sure you don't work 7 days a week . Get together with other families with children that are similar in age . This maybe a good option too .
No is the most popular word amongst toddlers. My 17 month old LOVES the word .. and she isn't my big talker either . Trust me , being a mom of 4 girls , they all develop in their own time .