Ladies How Do You Feel About Men Being Able To...

Men don't belong in women's dressing rooms. If your daughter needed help he should have taken her into the mens. There is a huge difference between that and taking a young boy to the women's restroom/dressing room. Coed dressing rooms are different because everyone knows not to walk out half dressed.

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As a former Penney's employee I agree with Penney's on this. I would also say that most of the time the man going into the fitting room to help his daughter is perfectly okay. But how does the store employee know that? How would we know if it's really his daughter? I remember when I took my daughter shopping when she was about 12 and this guy kept going in the fitting room to see what his wife was trying on--I was P***ed. I threatened to call the police on him. His reply 'my wife is in there' ya jerk so is MY DAUGHTER and I don't know you and I don't know if you are are pervert watching my daughter change clothes. (I stayed out of the fitting room to give her privacy)
NO MEN IN A FEMALE'S DRESSING ROOM.
One more story--some sex advisor told couples to spice up their sex lives by finding an empty fitting room in a store and having sex in there. So we almost caught a couple one night at Penney's. We saw them as they were sneaking back out. I had to explain to my teenaged co-worker the substance on the mirror wasn't spit--ya you guessed it.

ADDED:
As far as adding additional dressing rooms for 'family dressing rooms'... The Penney's I worked at took out two dressing rooms one in the women's department and one in men's. Since the downturn in the economy stores are cutting employee hours and it is almost impossible to monitor dressing rooms. Keeping them cleaned out is a full time job and most associates are so busy at the cash register they don't have time to clean out the fitting room. There just aren't enough people to keep them clean, monitor them for shoplifting and to stop couples from boinking in the fitting room. Until customers start to hang up the clothes they try on and place them back on the rack provided, a retail associate's time is spent cleaning up after inconsiderate customers.

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i would be pretty upset if i went into a fitting room and a man was there. i'd also be UBER-pissed if i sent a daughter in there and she found a man.
how is the store supposed to know who's a sicko and who isn't? that's why they have blanket policies. everyone always wants the rules to be all about them, but there really are times where 'what's best for most' has to prevail.
yes, there should be family dressing rooms. but if there aren't, and the dad isn't comfortable sending his daughter in alone, she needs to try on the dress on the floor over her clothes.
i never went into the men's room with my boys, and i don't want men in a women's restroom or fitting room.
khairete
S.

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ok if i was a mom with a young son needing to try on clothes, he would come into the women's. NO I wouldn't prance into a men's dressing room citing, "i'm with my son, it's okay!" as my license to invade their space. the employee should have asked him to use the men's.

"family" dressing rooms would be great. just like "family" restrooms in every public place would be great. but there wasn't one. most places don't have them. so then it's on us to be respectful of those around us. as a woman would you care if a little boy was behind a curtain trying on clothes while you were in the next stall? i wouldn't. i bet men wouldn't mind if a little girl was trying on clothes in the next stall, either. the whole point of him going with her is to "protect" her from perverts with prying eyes...let him do it in the men's dressing room. i would much prefer a little boy with his mama, to a grown man with his little girl, be in the ladies dressing room. and that works both ways.

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Why didn't he take her in the mens fitting room? Does he take her to the mens room when she has to use the bathroom or does he send her in the womens by herself? It would help to know her age. Regardless, I don't try on clothes in the fitting room, I just buy all of them and try them on in the comfort of my own bedroom and if they don't fit or I don't like them I return them. Maybe he can do that. Good luck.

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In my opinion, I would not like a man going into the dressing room, depending on how the dressing room is constructed. It they are just stalls, then no. If they are actual rooms (floor to ceiling with a door), then I don't see as much wrong with it. You know your husband is not doing something wrong, but do the other people? Wouldn't you want the store looking out for your daughter's safety? So, if the shoe were on the other foot and some other guy was in there taking his daughter to try on clothes frequently just to sneak peaks at some other girls..........wouldn't you be upset?

My husband gets around this by waiting just outside the dressing room. Our daughter then gets to "put on a fashion show". She will go in and put the clothes on, then come out and model them for daddy to get his approval or not.

I do not agree with the store personnel helping anyone get dressed. I am sure she was just trying to be helpful. But, do you see how you felt about her, as a stranger, being present? Well, that is how the other people view your husband being in there. So, unless the dressing room is room with a door, he should not be in there. Many a child predator (male AND female) has used their own children to gain access to other children.

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If your daughter is older than 8, your husband should NOT take her into a dressing room anymore. That would be very wierd. Why don't you take your daughter shopping from now on? That would make things a whole lot easier. To address your comment about single men who are parents - they would have their sister, aunt, or mother take their daughter shopping, or, they would buy the clothes that they think is their daughters' size and have them try it on at home and return whatever doesn't fit.

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I've been in ladies' dressing areas where men have been to check out their girlfriend's clothes. They were told to leave, and I was glad. I have also used a family dressing room, so there are some already out there.

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I don't see the big deal. Many stores now have mixed sex dressing rooms (I think Gap or J. Crew & Banana Republic). You close the door to change so? The stores (not too many anymore) that have a large public space where everyone changes and there are no doors - that I would understand. He should send a letter to the company stating he will be spending his $$ at a store that is more parent friendly.

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As a woman I can go into my son's dressing rooms ... I do not understand why a father can not escort his daughter ... back to double standards.

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He shouldn't be in the dressing room with her. She needs privacy as much as the other females. Family bathrooms are for families with little kids. After a certain age kids demand privacy, especially with the opposite sex parent. Dad will just hav eto wait outside and have her come out and model the outfit for him.

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I think it might freak me out a little if I was trying on clothes and realized there was a man in the dressing room. Most likely if I was aware that he was supervising a child, I would be less bothered, but those stalls aren't exactly the most private places in the world, especially if you have young kids (like I do) who are kind enough to open the doors randomly and reveal your undressed self to the poor unsuspecting passersby. Not cool even when that's a woman going by, horrifying if it's a man.

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Men don't belong in a ladies dressing room - period - end of story no matter who they are.

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NO. The others are right. When I was a little kid and needed to go to the restroom but only had my dad with me, he would pick me up and be talking silly like "OK, Clyde, we're going into the men's bathroom because we're both men, right?" and I'd say "I'm not a MEN!" and he'd say "Why are you being silly Clyde, of course you're a man" (as he was walking, kind of giving anyone a chance to finish up or get in a stall, I suppose...at the time I thought he was just being silly and making me laugh). Of course he wouldn't take me into the women's room. Thank goodness for family restrooms now. But I wouldn't take my boy into a man's room, I'd take him into the women's room if there was no family option. The child is not the person that's going to make someone uncomfortable or be a potential threat; it's the adult that would make a man or woman nervous. Same thing for the dressing room. Common sense would say that if you have a YOUNG daughter, he'd take her into the men's dressing room with him. If she's old enough to get dressed and handle it all herself, then you hand the clothes to the attendant and sit outside the entrance. The attendant isn't going to go in and dress your child and be a potential threat, she is going to hand the hanger over the door and knock on the door and then the daughter, when decent, can open the door for the next item. The dad sitting outside the entrance can hear their conversation and the door close.
As someone who found herself in a very bad situation in a public bathroom as an 18 year old, I would probably flip out if I saw a man in a ladies' bathroom or dressing room. I was very very drunk in New Orleans as a kid and bumped into 2 uniformed officers on my way to the bathroom about 4am one night. One policeman asked if I was old enough (at that time you could buy alcohol at 18 but weren't supposed to drink it until 21---I know, long story, LA politics) and I slurred that I was 21 and he asked my birthdate and of course I couldn't do that math between my LA education and drunken state. I just walked past him and went to the bathroom. I suppose they acted like concerned police because they walked in and noone thought anything of it (?) as I was washing my hands and face and they picked me up, put me in the sink. It was one of those pedastal sinks and it was very "high" and scary with the checkered floor swirling all around, I thought I was "REALLY" high up. They were laughing and joking, singing the Beatles' birthday song, I just remember they were really really close and their swirly faces were up in mine, but that's all I have specific memory of. Someone walked in, looked, walked out without a word. The police left immediately. I just sat there stranded in the really high sink, looking down but with it spinning I just didn't dare jump out in case I missed the floor. Friends who were looking all over for me finally found me with no shirt or bra, jeans undone but still on, me still holding on real tight so I wouldn't fall off. Thankfully, nothing happened because someone had opened the door, but it COULD have happened. It's very scary to think that a man would ever be in a women's restroom or dressing room. It is not scary to have a little girl or boy in an adult's bathroom because they couldn't hurt an adult. You don't know what others have been through, and your husband, even if his intentions are good, could really upset someone. If he for some reason doesn't want to let an attendant hand clothes over the door or bring your daughter to the men's dressing room, then the other option would be to buy the clothes and return what you don't want.
Finally, my husband takes me clothes shopping all the time. He sits in a chair by the door and I show him what I like or goes get what I need while I'm trying on something else. I come get it with the next outfit to "model" or he gives it to the attendant to bring me if I'm still in there. The attendants don't get up in the room with you. I just open it a crack and take what she's bringing. That's common sense and I don't see why this would be hard to understand.

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It would not phase me.
I took my son into the dressing room with me for years - he has "boy" parts and no one seemed to mind.
Shouldn't be any different.

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Back, ions ago, when I was in high school (back in the 80's), a friend and I had an experience where two men decided to use the women's dressing room at a store in our local mall to try on women's clothing. If memory is correct, I think it was a chain that isn't around anymore, like Compass or something like that. A trendy teen store for sure.

The stalls were pretty pathetic and there was barely any privacy. The stalls were only chest high (so depending on your height people might "see" your body. Everyone could see each other, and there was only a fabric curtain at the entrance of each stall. It was basically an open room with a bunch of short walls dividing everyone.

Anyhoo, the two men got into a fight with the dressing room attendant when she told them to leave, after many of the women/girls in the room complained, screamed, and everything else to get them out of there. At first when they walked in and started undressing, everyone just kinda stared in shock. Then, after a few minutes, one woman got all in the face of one of the two, saying he was looking at her, and she didn't like it. They felt they should be there because of their orientation (I'm guessing transgendered because they came in wearing women's street clothing), so they argued there was no threat to anyone in the room. That's when many went off and said that they don't belong in there because they weren't women...and shouldn't be looking at women, etc.

I personally felt very uncomfortable despite the men's apparent "intent." Especially in "that" particular dressing room, because there really wasn't much privacy to start with. It's bad enough being half clad in front of strange women ...who needs to add someone from the opposite sex to the mix? Who knows? The thought definitely crossed my mind that they could have been two pranking high schoolers or college frat guys making the whole thing up to get free looks or secretly take pics or something. For two people who were suppposed to be interested in trying clothes on, they really did seem awful interested in looking at everyone else in the room - that's what caused the commotion. Some woman accused them of staring at her upper region, and then heck broke loose. It was very uncomfortable for everyone in the room anyway.

Even if their intentions weren't bad, I certainly don't want men to start feeling like it's okay to loiter around dressing rooms. There are kooks out there who would take advantage of this opportunity. No one from the opposite sex should be in the opposite sex's dressing room ...just not a good idea for so many reasons. JMO.

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If it was specifically a WOMEN's/GIRL's dressing room that means no men. There are women with underwear on and I would not want a man in a women's dressing room... a boy under 10 ok but not over the age of 10. Most of those dressing rooms have space under and above left open I would not like it to have a man in there.

If it is a genearl dressing room, then the rooms are usually floor to ceiling walled off. I am ok with the mixing then.

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My husband was a single father of two. (A boy and a girl)

He would take her into the men's dressing room. Problem solved.

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I'm confused. I agree with MzKitty. Why would he go into the women's room? He wouldn't go into the women's restroom, would he? He really should have taken her into the men's room. Also, like a few others are saying, how old is she? My son is eight & since he knows how to dress himself, he goes by himself into the dressing room. He then comes out to show me how things fit. A father taking a daughter is the same as a mother taking a son. As the mom, would you have gone into the men's room with your son? No, you'd take him into the women's room.

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Unfortunately, the stores have to limit their liability with all the sickos around today. With closed doors for stalls or booths, I don't understand why there are gender specific dressing rooms in stores today (even in the lingerie section, I don't see a reason to leave the stall unless you're modeling for, you guessed it, a guy). Many stores - Old Navy, Gap, Eddie Bauer - in our mall have one shared dressing area for everyone. In these cases, the dressing area is much busier and I feel like someone is less likely to try something sketchy (just my opinion).

As for the daddy-daughter thing, that's great. My dad always had a good eye for what's flattering to me and even picked out my wedding dress! You go, dad!

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It would have made me feel uncomfortable going into a women's dressing room with a man in there. Just because sometimes when I come out of the dressing room to use the big mirrors my bra might be showing or I have to ask my friend in the stall next to me to zip up a dress. Then if he was coming out of the stall at that time, he would be able to see me half undressed. I don't mind if it is a little boy in there with his mother. But older boys need to use the men dressing room and go out of there to show mommy how it fits.

I think young kids should go into the bathroom/ fitting room that their parents would normally go into.

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Yes it would bother me to see a man in the dressing room area. I get he is with his daughter but I would still be bothered. You can see through the cracks or curtains of the doors and so what if the man is with his daughter he can still be a creep. I also will step out of the room to or partialy leave the door open to let the person I may be with help me zip or give me a quick opinion and I dont' want some dude in there I don't know. I think it's sweet that your daughter and her dad go shopping together so many men are uninterested with daughters but I still wouldn't want him in the dressing room. While family dressing rooms are a good idea I also see the potential for other things happening in them..not just adults and teenagers having sex but pedifiles...I

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He should take her in the men's dressing room!

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Since you don't say how old she is it's hard to answer.
When my kids were little they never tried on clothes in stores, I usually shopped without them and then just returned anything they didn't like or that didn't fit.
And, no, I would NOT be comfortable with a man in the girls dressing room.

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I think there must be a special section for kids where either of the parents may go and get their dresses changed.

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Age is key here. Depending on her age, it can be totally inappropriate. If she is over 1st grade or so, that's a little weird...in my opinion. Also, if I were going into a dressing room and a man were in there, I would feel very strange about it.

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I agree with everyone. I'd say it would be the same as bathroom rules, he should take her to the mens room if shes really little. Also if shes so little that she needs help you don't need to go into a dressing room. If shes old enough to put the clothes on herself then she should be big enough for him to take a quick glance make sure shes safe and wait outside...I wouldn't be offended if I was helping my daughter and saw a guy helping his daughter, but I'd def. worry if I sent in my daughter to find a guy....would your husband be ok if he sent her in and there was a guy in there? There are double standards..not always fair thats the way it is

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Except in some higher end stores where one must pass through a 'ladies lounge' or a 'gentelman's lounge' (where I'v also always found 'private dressing rooms' for use by either or both sexes... Nearly EVERY store I've ever shopped in has had men in the dressing area. Be it a husband holding a purse, a boyfriend proving how sensitive he is, a gay shopping buddy (Honey, no. Take that off and burn it!), a dad with young daughter helping, a dad chaperoning a teen daughter and friends... there have ALWAYS been men in the dressing rooms.

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Hmm. I think I would feel kinda weird if I was in the dressing room and a man was in the stall next to me. They are usually kinda flimsy and sometimes see through the crack types of places, let alone the ones that only have curtains and not doors. Maybe it would be best if dad took the daughters to the men's dressing room, just like moms taking boys into the ladies rest room.
But, yes, I agree maybe on the family dressing room idea, separate from just the "ladies" room.

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tell the clerk to deal, or go to another store. i went into the mens bathroom the other day to help my "husband" change our daughters diaper, she needed her diaper changed and she wanted me to change her diaper, however, she prefers to stand while having her bottom changed on a changing table, and she is a squirmer, and i have limited use of my left arm, and i wouldnt want to risk her squirming (and falling) while i wrestled with changing a standing toddler ONE HANDED. soooo, the three of us went into the mens room, and while "daddy" entertained the baby, i changed her little bottom. teamwork,if it aint broke, dont fix it.
K. h.

How odd, I guess I would just have mine wait until they were finished. I am not going to say I wouldn't think about not going in while he was there because I just wouldn't. There are always cracks and ways to see in their dressing rooms.

I think he could have taken her to the men's dressing rooms instead so he could feel much more comfortable.

YESSSS!!! I am all for the FAMILY DRESSING ROOM idea!! WHY hasn't someone thought of that already?!?!!!

I don't expect anyone to think twice about me bringing my yong son into the restroom or dressing room with me. Of course, I am bringing him into my (female) dressing room, not me trying to bring him into the male dressing room. Perhaps they would have preferred him to bring his daughter into the men's dressing room? My thought is that you (the adult) bring your child into your own restroom or dressing room. Works for me so far.

depends on how old the daughter was... 8 years or older - No, I'd not ask or expect my husband to help her get dressed. & and under -yes, I'd be fine with that.

How does that dressing room attendant know that it was her Father - just because he said so? So many pedophiles start off with helping their victims in the dressing room... it may have been on of the "How to keep people safe" seminars new employees must go to when they are in orientation.

You already have many responses; however, it may make a difference in the way people feel about it (one way or the other) if you had told us the age of your daughter.

My DH was a single dad for many years and though he didn't buy so many clothes (his ex did), there were times he took her with him in the men's dressing room, figuring the door was closed so who would care? She also went to the men's room with him as a toddler (before family restrooms) just like my friend takes her sons with her in the ladies' room. When she was about 8, he'd send her in the bathroom herself and lurk outside the door and ask women if they'd check on her if it'd been too long. I imagine he would have done the same with a dressing room if she were old enough to go in and dress herself.

I think family dressing rooms would be a good idea and as far as the pedophile comment - women prey, too, just not as frequently. I'd look at the behavior between the two of them. You can usually tell if people "belong" or not.

I guess I don't see what the big deal is. Are we talking group dressing rooms (which are at very few stores around here - the kind where there is no privacy) or the rooms in various areas of the store with multiple stalls and curtains or a door on each one? Assuming we're talking about he the latter, why is gender an issue? I freely walk into the dressing rooms in the boys and young men's areas of Kohl's to help out my sons, take back what doesn't fit, bring a new size, whatever. My husband has taken his daughter shopping and I assume he does the same thing. I always see dads sitting in the chairs in the waiting area of the junior's department at Kohl's, and I know for a fact that when we were younger, my husband would wait for me while I tried something on so that he could give his opinion. If everyone is in his or her own stall while changing, why does anyone care who is outside the curtain or the door? What do people do in stores such as Gap or Old Navy, where the fitting rooms are gender neutral? I just don't get what the ruckus is. Get a grip people.

I think it would depend entirely on how old your daughter is. If she's 4, then I think it would be acceptable. If she's 10, he shouldn't be seeing her half-naked, in the dressing room, bathroom, at home, or anywhere.
And, it would also depend on the store's policy.

I think stores would be wise to add "family dressing rooms." Just like there are family restrooms.

It wouldn't bother me. I expect my bf to escort our daughter 100% when he's with her in public (and not hand her over to a stranger). If the attendant had a problem with it, then he can take her to the men's dressing room. I did tell my bf to always ask the attendant where he should go with our daughter, just to make things easier.
I understand the whole argument of how does the attendant know thats really his kid and all, but honestly how do you know anyone with the kid is that kids family or caretaker?
One way is to observe the childs behavior to the adult (male or female) for clues.

Personally I don't care. In a place like JC pennys I would be able to go to a different department if I was weirded out that a man was helping his daughter in the dressing room.

I am more worried about the attendant. about 50% of child predators are female, so I would be asking about this woman REAL intention.