52 answers

Kissing My Son

Is it awkward to be kissing my 10 year old son? I dropped him off at school after a dr's appt and he kissed me goodbye. We did a quick peck on the lips. The look I got from the girls working in the office was like they were mortified that I still kiss my son goodbye. He is a very affectionate child and very sweet. I think it is great that he still wants to hug and kiss me goodbye, but it obviously makes others uncomfortable. What do you think? Do you still kiss your children?

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thank you so much for all your answers. To Mrsiamlove--that is so funny you wrote that because that is what kind of sparked this question. My son definitely doesnt grab my boob :-) I saw that story though, and then thought about the reaction I got from the ladies in the school office and thought, where do you draw the line. Is giving a quick peck too much?
I am going to keep giving my son kisses. I grew up in a very NON touchy, kissy, huggy family and it makes me sad sometimes. So I am going to enjoy them as long as I can get them.
Thanks for all your wonderful words.

Featured Answers

I Still kiss my mom (I'm 34) and would hope that my DS (19 months) will kiss me for a loong loong time :-) LOL
WHO CARES WHAT OTHERS THINK :-) enjoy the kisses

6 moms found this helpful

I'm 31 and my parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents kiss me on the lips. I kiss my 8yo. There's uptight people everywhere, and there are people to whom it means nothing, and there are people that just have great relationships with their growing and grown children.

Don't let uptight people sweat you.

5 moms found this helpful

I'm jealous....my 6 yr old son won't kiss me in public....tell 'mortified' onlookers to kiss off, lol

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

I Still kiss my mom (I'm 34) and would hope that my DS (19 months) will kiss me for a loong loong time :-) LOL
WHO CARES WHAT OTHERS THINK :-) enjoy the kisses

6 moms found this helpful

My family is European so for us it's VERY normal. I’ve never noticed anyone giving me strange looks when I kiss my kids though. My daughter is 13 and most Moms tell me how jealous they are of our close bond and wish their children still wanted to hug, kiss and cuddle!

6 moms found this helpful

Even as an adult, I would kiss my parents. The girls at your work seriously need to chill. Do they have children? If they did, why would they think there was a magic age one should stop being affectionate with them? Just a thought.

5 moms found this helpful

I'm 31 and my parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents kiss me on the lips. I kiss my 8yo. There's uptight people everywhere, and there are people to whom it means nothing, and there are people that just have great relationships with their growing and grown children.

Don't let uptight people sweat you.

5 moms found this helpful

I kiss my boys everyday, but they are 4 and 17 months. I little different. But I still kiss both of my parents on the mouth and I'm 27. So there you go. If your son is still ok with it them there is nothing wrong with it at all, I think you are teaching him that affection for parents is appropriate and it will help him to be a more respectful man in my eyes.

4 moms found this helpful

If it's not awkward for you or for him, it's not awkward. Who cares what other people "might" be thinking? You can't really know unless they tell you. They may have a touch of indigestion, jealousy, or surprise.

And if they are indeed mortified by a quick kiss, I figure that's too bad for them.

4 moms found this helpful

My son is 9 and still kisses me goodbye on the lips. A friend commented about it being "gross" the other day, and I told the boy that different families have different habits, and in our family we give kisses. I remember when I was in 6th grade my mom got her feelings really hurt when I asked her not to hug me in front of my friends, so I've always been sensitive to my children's leading. This is my 4th child and I will treasure his love as long as I can. My other kids have graduated to hugs, except my oldest son that is 28, he will smooch me on the lips still. <3

4 moms found this helpful

I'm jealous....my 6 yr old son won't kiss me in public....tell 'mortified' onlookers to kiss off, lol

4 moms found this helpful

Still kissing my 3. The oldest will be 10 next month(son), second is 7 (son)and youngest is 19 months(daughter). They still won't go to sleep without their night-night kiss! They still need and want the affection.
The girls working in the office need to get over it!

4 moms found this helpful

my almost 17 year old (who is 8 1/2 months pregnant) kisses me on the lips, always, calls me mommy... she will always be my baby and I will always love her cute little lips giving mine a peck... its never awkward to be loving and affectionate, especially when the kids initiate it! I see kids who are embarrassed by the affection between them & their parents, and run off without much of a goodbye, Im very happy my daughter has never been ashamed to just act natural in whatever the situation is.

4 moms found this helpful

I think 50% of the population are lip kissers and the other half are cheek kissers with their children/family etc. I don't think kissing your 10 yr old is weird. Perhaps they were an office of cheek kissers..so they were just thrown off by the lip kissing. It is great that your son is still affectionate.

4 moms found this helpful

Unless they're overly paranoid about cold and flu season, they need to get a life :) Who cares if it makes others uncomfortable. He's your son, you love each other, be affectionate.

4 moms found this helpful

I think those ladies should mind their own business and worry about the kids who aren't getting the love and affection their parents should be giving them! Kiss your kids until they won't let you anymore!!
I am 36 and still kiss my parents every time I see them!

4 moms found this helpful

I kiss my nephew, and he will still hug me - he's 16. If I see any one kissing their child, I would never think if it as inappropriate. It's family. Don't let any sort of social stigma/snootiness prevent you from showing affection to your son! It's sad that people react that way.

4 moms found this helpful

The girls in office who gave you a mortified look (s)? must be rather sick individuals. And too bad if they are uncomfortable. They are probably jealous.You are the mother and you can kiss your son for the rest of your life. Just don't try to kiss him on the toes, very stinky.

3 moms found this helpful

Oh its FINE!

In some cultures, it is just that way.
No biggie.

In my Husband's family/culture for example, they kiss each other on both cheeks then the lips. It just is. A cultural conduct, and considered "proper." And among ALL age groups from young to old.

My kids are only 4 and 8- but they are affectionate self-assured kids that way and we all kiss each other.

Appreciate it... one day, our kids will not even want to be hugged by us... in front of their friends or anyone!
:)

all the best,
Susan

3 moms found this helpful

My boys still kiss me they are 8 and 14. I get a kiss goodnight and sometimes a kiss goodbye or just a kiss on the cheek for no reason from both of them.

3 moms found this helpful

People are so weird about stuff. He's your son; do whatever you both feel comfortable with. I'll be kissing my son as long as I can and if he's anything like me and my family it will continue through adulthood.

3 moms found this helpful

My brother is 33 and still kisses my mom on the lips

3 moms found this helpful

I agree with Riley. I'll kiss my sons lips for as long as he'll let me. I don't care what other people think about it.

3 moms found this helpful

Awww, mine are 18, 16, and 13. I will smooch them as long as they'll let me!

And beyond, tehehe.

:)

3 moms found this helpful

Hi Leah, I would say continue on as long as your son is comfortable. As others said, let him set the tone. I think it is wonderful and would not be concerned with how others interpret the situation. They are likely just jealous. :-) I have two daughters that we still kiss each other on the lips and I have a close friend with a 16 year old son who kisses her on the lips regularly. So not out of the ordinary at all. Take care!! C.

2 moms found this helpful

My son is 9 - I will kiss him as long as he lets me! LOL ~ I wouldn't worry about what those women think. There is nothing wrong with you kissing your son. Now of course, if you are giving him tongue or something, that would be another story,......LOL - but that does not sound like what you are talking about!

2 moms found this helpful

I am 34 and I still kiss my parents on the lips. My eldest son is 8 and sometimes he's weird about kissing me in public and other times he is fine with it so I let him lead the way. If he wants to kiss me then I do kiss him on the lips, but I never approach him for a kiss in public.
I say if your son is fine with it then it's no big deal. Don't worry about what others think, some people are just weird about public displays of affection.

2 moms found this helpful

My oldest son stopped wanting hugs around 3rd grade and the youngest gave me hugs up until his death at age 22 this summer. My daughter is almost 28 and still gives me a peck on the lips when she leaves. My grandmother always gave me a peck on the lips when we said goodbye when she was alive also. I wouldn't worry about what the office girls think, it seems that you have a great relationship with your son and that is great.

2 moms found this helpful

I don't think there is anything wrong with this. I take cues form my kids... when they are uncomfortable with something then we talk it out.

I wouldn't worry what the girls in the office think. People always need to have something to talk about.

It's sweet you have such a close relationship with your child.

2 moms found this helpful

It is not your job to make other people feel good. It is you job to make your son feel good and loved.

2 moms found this helpful

I still kiss my 21 yr old but time and place appropriate. dont worry before long you will hear not in public mom my friends might see me :)

2 moms found this helpful

I have three children, girl, girl, boy...and pregnant with another girl. I've never kissed any of my children on the lips. Only on the cheek, forehead, nose, top of head, tummies, feet, hands to I kiss them. But whenever they have come to me wanting to kiss my lips, I've always turned my head away so they get my cheek instead. That is just me, though. I wouldn't think it was weird if I saw you kiss your son on the lips...but for me, it wouldn't feel right.

I always kiss them though and hug them to death. : )

2 moms found this helpful

YES!!!! Now that they are all teens and older, I have to kiss them against their will. My youngest gave me a peck on the lips until 16. Then I started turning my cheek, 'cause it's time for him to get a girlfriend.

Don't worry about what they think.

2 moms found this helpful

My son is only 3, but i will give him kisses as long as he does the same. Don't worry about what looks you get or even what people may say, because eventually you won't have that affection anymore and it could turn into just a hand shake or maybe a hug. The people in the office OBVIOUSLY do not know REAL FAMILY LOVE.....!!!!!

1 mom found this helpful

I know I am kinda late to the game, but my thought was that it won't be long until he wants you to drop him off a block from the school and not be seen anywhere near you, so I would not worry one bit about what others think. My DD is only 3 and we still lip kiss, but DH is teaching her already to kiss him on the cheek. At some point you might need to teach him some boundaries but he might start developing a different comfort level on his own as far as lip-kissing vs. a peck on the cheek.

1 mom found this helpful

I have a 15 year old daughter, 13 year old son and 4 year old son... I kiss them all. I cannot kiss the older two when dropping off at school, but I do still kiss them whenever I can. I think around 6th grade the both told me no more kisses in public. I personally don't see anything wrong with it. I still kiss my parents to this day. Every time I leave I give them a kiss, I live 1 mile away and see them very often... Nothing wrong in my book!

1 mom found this helpful

There is nothing wrong with that... looks like those girls have never heard of an affectionate household, or maybe just not one that has boys. Don't let it worry you!

1 mom found this helpful

Take it and run with it as long as you can.....my 6year old would die if I kissed him good bye :( ...lol...so everyone can turn there heads if thye don't like it. Don't worry about what people say or the looks they give.

1 mom found this helpful

I would keep doing it! Soon enough he'll be embarrased to kiss his mom goodbye, dont let your friends or anyone try to ruin it for you!

1 mom found this helpful

I agree with lots of other posters - there is NOTHING WRONG with kissing your son goodbye on the lips or cheek or head (its not like it was some long passionate kiss!, please, office ladies{eye rolll}), as long as he doesn't object!

I kiss my kids on the mouth, they are 2 and 4, and I will continue to do so as long as they allow. I'm 33 and I still kiss my mom on the lips and give hugs, at chuch during the sign of peace and when we say goodbye/one of us leaves. My dad I do big hugs and kisses on the cheek - his side of the family are not very physically affectionate, so that is considered very affectionate for him.

Let your child lead and others looks be darned! Those office ladies are jealous ( cause their kids won't give them a kiss anymore) or they just come from non-kissing or cheek kissing families.

Jessie

1 mom found this helpful

I think I can explain the looks from the girls. It's ok to kiss your children, no matter the age, however not on the lips. Even same gender - mother kissing daughter, would probably get a weird look, but even more so when it's the opposite gender. Lips are generally considered private, and I have never seen anywhere that a lips-on-lips kiss even when it's just a peck was a comfortable kiss for an adult and certainly not a comfortable one to watch. That's probably why you got the looks.
I smooch my kids all the time, but mostly on cheeks, sometimes forehead. Also, from setting limits and setting an example standpoint, I don't want my daughter to kiss my son on the lips, and I don't want her father to do that to her either, so how am I different? That would send a confusing message if I did that.

1 mom found this helpful

In my opinion, it's strange to be kissing a pre-teen still. However, that's just my opinion. In my family, no that won't be happening. I would never look at someone strange and make it obvious so you could tell (I think that's rude to do so) , but I would feel very uncomfortable around it.

PS. I would not encourage "training your son" to be a good kisser, that's disgusting. And If saw anyone kissing their child for more then a few seconds, I would find that disturbing.

1 mom found this helpful

I do still kiss my kids. But I no longer kiss my son on the lips. He is 12. I don't know why, maybe because as I grew my parents quit kissing me on the lips. I can't say exactly WHY but sometime around age 10 it starting feeling 'weird' or awkward to me... somehow not exactly appropriate. So I just started kissing him on the forehead or cheek instead. No big deal.

I doubt the co-workers in your office thought that kissing him was odd, but perhaps it being on the lips made them feel uncomfortable. I wouldn't read any more into than that it is not the cultural norm that they grew up with.
No worries.

1 mom found this helpful

Of course it is fine! I think that is very sweet :-)

if you are both still comfortable with it, go for it. now, if hes a teen and touching your boob in a half embrace while kissing on the lips (like that crazy looking photo of some celebrity with her son recently)... thats probably going a little far. but as long as neither one of you are uncomfortable, its really no one else's business!

I would enjoy it while it lasts.... Before too long you are going to have to come up with a 'code word' to show affection. lol.

There is nothing wrong with that as long as he is comfortable. People can be such pervs.
C.

well mine is four, so i have no idea where i'll be in 6 years BUT...it might look a little wierd for it to be on the lips at this point, i mean just me personally, a cheek might be more comfortable for some people. but just the fact that you kissed him at all - not wierd, wonderful! what a sweet wonderful boy. i hope mine is still sweet and wonderful at that age.

My 10 year old kisses me and so does my 15 year old daughter. Well actually she comes and puts her cheek in my face so I can kiss her.
I kiss all three of the ones at home goodnight every night. I kiss them goodbye when they go away form me.
My dad kisses me and I him and I kiss my mom.
It's OK and he knows he is loved. He'll be a good husband and father.

I can see where lip on lip would be a bit weird to watch, I think cheek and forehead are more appropriate at this age.... but I'm not you! You keep on doing what is best for you and your family :)

My son is 11 and we still kiss. He usually doesn't want to kiss me in front of his friends, but other than that, he's fairly affectionate. As long as you are both comfortable with it, and know that there is nothing wrong with showing each other affection, I wouldn't worry about what others think.

I kissed all of my grandparents and great grandparents until the day died.

I am 28 years old and to this day I still kiss my mom and dad on the lips when I leave them (although that isn't very often as they live in another state). My husband thinks its weird, but its just what we have always done. I think its just fine kissing your parents. Especially at that young age.

I came from a family of Kissers - we kissed good morning, good night, whatever. But were and are cheek kissers. My son at 14 is very affecionate with me - just no in public anymore. :) That would not be cool. LOL

Love him and hug him and ignore others - they are just jealous that you two are so close.

I'm 30 and still kiss my mom AND dad on the lips. I once asked my husband if he thought it was weird. He said Not at all.

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