Kindergarten Dillema

Hi L., Trust your gut instinct. I make mistakes when I listen too much to society and well meaning friends, and not my heart.
Best of Luck.
Jilly

P.S. No decision is every final. YOu can always change your mind if something does not work. This may be of comfort

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Talk to his preschool teachers and see what they recommend. I just attended a kindergarten readiness seminar last week. One of the key things they stressed is that academic readiness only accounts for about 25% of whether or not someone is ready for kindergarten. The other 75% is social, the ability to listen, follow directions and sit still in the classroom, maturity, ability to care for themselves (use the bathroom, put on a jacket, etc).

Also, the cutoff date is changing. Here is the schedule:
2011 - Dec 2
2012 - Nov 1
2013 - Oct 1
2014 - Sep 1 (this will be the new permanent cutoff date)

K.
http://oc.citymommy.com

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In most States... Kindergarten is not 'mandatory.'
If a child enters school... at say turning 6 years old... some schools will then put that child into 1st grade.
Maybe, you could home-school him... to prep for 1st grade... or, just enter him into Kinder now... you said, your son is ALSO 'socially' fine. Not only academically.

Being youngest or smallest... has not hampered other kids, entering Kinder at turning 5 years old.

My daughter, entered Kinder at turning 5 years old... she entered at 4 years old...then a few months later, turned 5. She did fine. About half or less than half of her classmates... were late-born kids who were turning 5 upon entering Kindergarten. Physical Size.... was not confined to only the late-born kids being small. Even some of the turning 6 year old kids... were small too. Which I witnessed myself. Age has nothing to do with 'size' of a child.

Just some thoughts. My daughter is now in 3rd grade and although born late... is doing fine.

Here in my State... the age cut-off for Kindergarten... is in August. If turning 5 by August... the child can enter Kinder. BUT I hear, that in the future (who knows when next year or the years after), they 'may' be changing the cut-off date... to June or July (summer). Which I think is questionable... and I do not know of any other State, with age cut-offs that... way.

all the best,
Susan

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My first daughter was always the youngest in her class. She did quite well. I was also the youngest in my class and it was okay.
If he's a smart child let him go to kindergarten. No Child Left Behind will go out of the school systems all over the country very soon. Fashions in education don't ever last 12 years.

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He will be 5 the entire school year so I dont understand your concern on that, BUT if you know that he is not mature enough for K wait one more year. My mother waited to enroll my brother until he was 6 (his bday is June) It was the best thing she could have done and he is doing very well at 16!

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If you feel that your son is ready then start him in Kindergarten. It's really the only sure way to know. My son will turn five in mid October and we are planning on starting him as well. There is nothing worse than a little one being bored so early in school because he knows the material. It could set him up for a dislike of learning and even lead to acting out (talking, playing around in class, goofing off, etc...) There will be other kids turning five days, weeks or months before him, so even if he is the actual youngest, there will be other kids very close to his age. Size is irrelevant because all children grow at their own pace and there could be six year olds smaller than him. And as we all know, come adulthood... we come in all shapes and sizes!!! Good luck!!!

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We were born in California. We have been through both sides. My sister and I were both right after the cutoff dates. My mom let her go through and later she held me back. My sister did fine. I was bored stiff. I could already do all the things they were teaching and I hated it. I was a really good kid, but started to talk and play too much. Which means...I got into trouble. I never had anything to do, because I was over all that stuff.
I was always the smallest no matter how close in age I was. I was just a small kid and to be honest, it was never a problem. If your son is going to be bored and not be challenged, it's really setting him up for failure. If my parents did it over, they'd put me through and not hold me back. He is ready, then he will be fine. If he weren't ready, it would make total sense to hold him back. That's not the case, though.

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The cut off date when I started kindergarten was October 1st and my birthday was October 9th. my parents decided to wait for the next year for me to start school. I was smart (two older sisters to learn from) but I did just fine in school. I think to be the older one in class is actually kind of nice (especially when you are the youngest sibling). I got the opportunity to feel like i could maybe teach some of the "younger" kids a few things in my grade and it felt good to not be the baby. I remember that feeling well!!
Also, in my later school years, it was great to be the first one to get to do some things since it felt like an eternity to catch up to my older sisters. I drove before most of my friends and learned to be responsible with more "grown up" tasks before some of the others, which was a source of pride.
Either way I'm sure he will do wonderfully whatever you decide, as long as he has the support he needs. Just a perspective to consider! :)

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From personal experience, hold him back. I too am a November 28th baby, and was always either the youngest or one of the youngest in my class all through school. I was ready for school in many ways, but being the smallest in my class, the baby of the family, and shy, I was picked on continually. I also had learning issues that appeard a few years down the road. Boys in general do better with that extra year at home, but some girls do too. It's easier to hold him back now than it is to repeat a grade later. I was just 17 when I graduated and went off to college...way too young, even though I was mature. Best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

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Does your son go to preschool? What does his teacher recommend?

My 4-yo also has a November birthday. I feel that he is definitely ready academically to start kindergarten but have some concerns socially. Plus, he is short for his age. I spoke to his preschool teacher, and she told me that he'd be fine starting this year but that it would probably be a good idea to wait one more year if we could swing it. She said that even if he did ok now, at around 8th grade is when you really see a gap in maturity between the older and the younger kids in the class. Especially with boys. So that's something to consider.

You can always start him early and then if you feel that he needs more time, he can repeat kindergarten. In San Diego, they also have a junior kindergarten for children with fall birthdays. It basically follows the kindergarten curriculum and schedule but is more geared to younger children who are still learning how to be students. The understanding is that some (or most) of them will likely repeat the material in traditional kindergarten the following year. Children who are doing really well in this program have the option to switch to a regular kindergarten class after a few months. Maybe see if your school district has a similar program?

I think it's best to be older in the class, not the youngest. It's not about kindergarten. It's about Junior High School and High School. There is no way to predict if he will develop early or late. The poor boys who develop late and are the younger in their class have the most problems - socially. My son is a High School freshman who has two classmates who are a year younger than the rest on the freshman soccer team. Both are much smaller, their muscles are not as developed, so they don't get as much playing time and there are jokes about their size. Remember sending your son to school early means he will face drugs, alcohol, and sex a year earlier. He will also be going off to college/finishing high school a year sooner. Two of my four kids have late birthdays, so far both prefer to be older in their class. I haven't seen any downside.

If he hasn't been in a preschool or similar setting already, I'd definitely hold him back. I understand not wanting him to be bored, but being socially ready for K is more important than being academically ready.

Even if he has been in preschool, if he isn't prepared to listen, follow directions, do what the group is doing rather than heading off on his own, and, especially, switch to a different activity when he is told to, then he will struggle in K. And even if he does all that already, it's generally better to be older than younger, as others have noted.

It's far easier for everyone involved if you keep him home and/or in preschool one more year -- rather than struggling with "Do we make him repeat K, do we move him on to first grade anyway" if he has maturity/listening/staying with the group issues in K.

You won't regret holding them back but some feel regret with starting early by not being able to keep up. Wouldn't you want him to excell Vs. Struggle?

Instead of just assuming that he is ready, take him in to the school and have the school counselor test him for school readiness. See what she says. My son was above in some places, below in others. I asked her specifically, if he were HER son, would she keep him in preschool an extra year or put him in kindergarten. She told me that if I had the means to continue putting him in a paid pre-K, she would do that. If I didn't have the finances for it, to send him to kindergarten.

I did hold him back, and I have always been grateful for that because he had some speech and language issues that we continued to work on, and he was immature as well. That extra year made a big difference, but mostly when he became older. I might not have noticed early on, but entering the older grades, immaturity can cause a lot of problems.

Good luck with your decision,
D.

We struggled with this also. Our son has an end of August birthday... I spoke to his preschool teachers and to my daughter's kinder teacher (who had taught for 31 years). The preschool teacher felt that he was ready in "most" ways and the kinder teacher recommended that we go ahead and put him in and see how it went. She said that in most cases it's obvious by the end of September whether a child is ready or not. If he's not you just pull him and start him the next year... or if you feel like he's on the cups and just not getting a solid foundation, you can hold him back a year. In kindergarten it isn't as tragic to hold back as it would be in future grades.

My concern also was that he would ALWAYS be on the younger side and that could be hard for him in the teenage years, when maturity and decision making can be really important...

In our case it's worked out great. Our son loves school and he's doing fine. So I'd say... let him start. If you hold him back he can still have problems in the classroom because he's bored and that's a whole new set of issues...

Good luck,. It's a tough choice!

Let him go unless you feel he can't handle it.

My son's birthday is November 25. hard isn't it?

I am leaning towards having him do a half day kindergarten at a small school in our district and then having him do kindergarten in the bilingual immersion program that my other 2 kids attended.

There are also some good pre-K programs locally that are more challenging.

Like some of the others, I am not as concerned about him in kindergarten, but being a year or more behind his friends in high school seems potentially problematic to me, and even worse in college.

We were in this same predicament last year. I held my daughter back. I figured I couldnt have many regrets about her being ahead of the game, but I could have tons about letting her go.
I was the youngest in my class, and I hated it. I was always a B/C student. I think if I had been held back, I could have been so much more ahead. If your son is ahead of the game, they should have advanced classes that will challenge him.
I did not like being the smallest kid, last to drive etc.....I have no regrets at all about holding my daughter back.

Yikes, this means he would still be 5 when 1st grade starts(im assuming your school year begins late august)? I A Dec bday does not really make him that much older as he will still be 18 for 6 mos after graduation,no?
I suggest putting him in Kindergarten next year so he is one of the older kids,although . Reason being, as he gets older, and possibly interested in sports, being smaller may get in the way. Also, if you put him in now, when he is in highschool and in sophmore year, he will be one of the few not old enough to drive and this can be quite frustrating for a boy. Age may not be a factor in size now, but it will later. Boys have growth spurts right around 15/16 which may mean he will be having his growth spurt while everyone else in his class is already 17. Right now, it doesn't seem much of a big deal to start him early, but it could backfire later on. He will be emotionally younger than the others in his grade.
In the bigger picture, it may honestly best to start him him late so he is one of the older ones. Keep in mind that there will be others with bdays in Oct and November so he will not be the only "older" one next year. He will be 18 when he graduates just like a majority of the other kids. My brother started Kinder early and up until 5 th grade, it was great. But once he started to go through his pre teens and wanting to join sports, it was no longer so good. :/
Whatever you decide, will be fine. Just don't feel pressured to rush him. If he has never been to school, I don't see him getting "bored" no matter how advanced he is. Most of the children going in pretty much already know what the teachers intend to "teach". Kinder is mostly about social interaction and learning through play. It's a "prep" for 1st grade so they are accustomed to being in a school environment and follow correct procedures such as forming lines, raising your hand,staying in the desk,etc. It's not all about academics really until 1st grade anyway. :-) So why the rush?

I would hold him back. Academics is not the only issue to factor in. The advantages of holding him back will be his size, (for sports) his maturity level. And even though you think he will not be challenged, first grade is extremely difficult and a big change for some children, with a tons of homework, reading skills, math, I think it is to an advantage to give him another year to be ready for that type of work load. Boys generally do better being held back. Good luck!!

ugh. i wish the cutoff date in texas was that late. here its in august or sept. my daughter's bday is nov. 20th, so she obviously missed it.

she always asks when can she go to school. she wants to go to school. everyday it seems its the same thing. we couldn't afford putting her in preschool. so we're having to try to keep her busy which isn't easy.

i say, maybe let him choose? has he mentioned if he's excited about going to school or dreading it? there was a mom who mentioned that you can always pull him out if he doesn't seem ready within a month? i wish we had that option. oh well.