Just Wanted to Get Some Input on a Touchy Situation That I Have Never Had to Dea

Updated on March 24, 2012
W.U. asks from Three Lakes, WI
14 answers

Just wanted to get some input on a touchy situation that I have never had to deal with. My brother and fiance are about 15 weeks pregnant and went today for a sonogram and were hit hard by some bad news. They were told that the fetus appeared to have too much fluid in it's head around the brain, not in the brain, around the brain. This they were told that the fluid would not allow the brain to grow properly and that they need to go see a specialist. Very scary to many people who this has happen to but hits a little to close to home since this is my brother's first child, and they did find out that it is a baby boy! I dont know too much about this condition and just wanted to hear if anyone has heard of this and what was done about it and the long term affects. Thank you for your time to read this and hopefully someone will shed some light on this situation

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E.G.

answers from Atlanta on

Hey there,

Take a look at this link: http://www.babycenter.com/400_my-baby-has-fluid-on-her-br...

These are folks that had the very same issues. Read their profiles. You may be quite relieved after you do so.

Best,

E.

4 moms found this helpful

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I hesitated to respond because this happen to me/my son and we had a horrible outcome. My son passed away at 17 days old. During an ultrasound when I was 28 wks pregnant they discovered my baby's ventricles were enlarged (hydocephalus) and he had a fluid filled cyst (arachnoid cyst) on his brain. (The 20 week ultrasound was normal) We then had a fetal MRI done that showed my son was missing his a section of brain and the gray matter of his brain had not developed properly since 6 weeks gestation. This is very rare! I will say prayers that this baby is ok. However, if it is hydrocephalus, this can be treated by inserting a shunt at birth. My docs told me at the time that hydrocephalus did not neccessarily cause brain damage it would depend whether the fluid was under pressure or not. On a positive note, I had a friend who's daughter was born with hydrocephalus. She had a shunt put in and is now in her 3rd year of college. Best of luck!

5 moms found this helpful

B.S.

answers from Lansing on

At around 21 weeks I was told they thought my daughter could have extra fluid on her brain as one of her right ventricles was larger than what should be. After a lot of worrying, seeing a specialist (who told me he was 99% sure I would have a healthy baby) and more worrying as the spot enlarged towards the end......my daughter was born healthy and confirmed after an ultrasound and MRI. She had a cyst that would eventually dissolve in her ventricle.

She is a healthy 4 almost 5 year old now.

Just try to be supportive.....and keep positive.

3 moms found this helpful

J.U.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't have any advice or wisdom on the subject but, I am very sorry they are going through this. This has got to be very scary and heartbreaking to hear for them.
I am happy that they have a supportive family to see them through this time. They will need many shoulders, I am sure of that. I wish them well, and hope that the outcome isn't grim.
Take care.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Adding a thought here, no advice. We are fortunate in this country to have so much medical knowledge, help and advice. Stay positive.

3 moms found this helpful
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D..

answers from Charlotte on

Added - It's fine if the poster above disagrees with my thoughts here, but I just want to clarify that my point to W. was about HOW she talks about it with others - it isn't necessary for her to point out that it's more scary or worse because it's the first baby or that the baby is a boy. She certainly can FEEL that way, and I don't think less of it. It's just that there is no good reason to point this out. For all she knows, she may be talking to someone who may have had something bad happen to a child in their own family, not the first, and not a boy. THAT was my point - not that she was being inappropriate for how she actually feels.

Original:
They can do more to deal with this issue in-utero nowadays than they ever have before, so the baby has more of a chance of normality in 2012 than ever before. So be assured that if something CAN be done, it will.

You mention this being a touchy situation. I am not trying to fuss at you here, and I hope you won't take it as such. (Added- TRULY, I'm not trying to scold you, as was mentioned above!) But I want to say that if you make a deal out of this news being especially scary because it's your brother's first child and a BOY, it is somewhat glaring to your listener (or reader). It is no less frightening to parents with other children for this to happen, OR to parents of a girl who find out that their soon-to-be child has an abnormality. I say this to you so that perhaps you might leave this thought out when you talk about it to others, so that you don't inadvertently hurt someone's feelings.

Dawn

3 moms found this helpful
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H.M.

answers from Denver on

I disagree with Dawn to an extent -I think these cases are EXTRA HARD on people that do not have a healthy child already. It makes you question whether every child you conceive is going to have a problem - if you'll ever get to experience being a parent - if there is something inherently WRONG with you and your spouse.

I'm not saying it's easy for people that already have kids - I'm sure it's torturous - but speaking from experience - it was much much much harder to miscarry when I didn't have any kids and was dealing with my first pregnancy than anything after.

Also - finding out the gender just makes it that much more "real" - and now not only are you faced with a terrible dilemma (what if they ask her to abort, etc) and you have to make that choice about your SON - not just a nameless faceless "fetus" - I think it's a perspective issue.

Best of luck to your family

2 moms found this helpful
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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Thanks to medical technology, so MUCH can be done for so many problems, even while in utero....so support them while they educate themselves about what, when & how this can be helped.
All the best!

2 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

prayers to you & your family. Once they see the specialist, read up on it as much as possible to be able to understand fully what is going on.

Peace to you.

2 moms found this helpful
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3.B.

answers from Huntington on

Ultrasounds can be and are often wrong. I just answered another question about possible birth defects, and this story applies here too.

friends of ours were told early on that her baby had spinal bifida and wouldn't survive long past birth. She was strongly advised to abort the baby, but she wouldn't do it. They did multiple ultrasounds on her, and they all said the same thing. She held on to hope.

Well her baby boy will be turning two this June, and he is perfectly healthy. Now I'm not saying there is nothing wrong w/ your brothers child but I hear of stories like this all the time. Be supportive and loving, but urge them to seek other opinions and do research. You have my positive thoughts and prayers, good luck to your family! Keep us posted!

1 mom found this helpful

D.F.

answers from San Antonio on

I am so sorry your family is having to go through this. Be supportive and be there for them as much as possible. I totally understand the worry and the heartache y'all are experiencing.
It is so great of the moms that gave you some resources to check out and become knowledgeable of your situation. That is the main reason you posted your question. Don't fret over the "one" that scolded you for the wording. Your objective here was to gain perspective on YOUR families "touchy" situation. Your question is fine and no need to worry about hurting someone's feelings for the wording. You in no way were being malicious or fecetious.
I will say a prayer for your family. I hope all works out for the best.
Blessings!
D.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

My second child I was told she had fluid on the brain. When I went to the next appointment that was scheduled with a specialist, it was gone. I was told that sometimes as the brain is developing, fluid can get trapped in the folds of the brain but it works it's way out. Hopefully your families situation will turn out to be the same as mine and everything will continue on as normal:)

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B.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi Wagas-
Hang on to hope and see what the specialist finds with time.
I agree with the other responders- your brothers family won't know until more tests are complete.
We have friends that were given the same news. Their sons condition was severe and they had the choice to abort. One thing led to another and they didn't in the 11th hour.
Their son has had several surgeries for shunts. He is a vibrant kid- happy, fun, funny and is in public school. He is wheelchair bound and paralyzed from the waist down, yet buzzes around goofing off. While it created challenges some families don't face - they don't regret for a second how things are.
Continued prayers for you and your extended family.

B. J
about me:51 yo perfusionist and wellness coach, mom with 10 yo fraternal twin girls

S.S.

answers from Dallas on

Just want to send good vibes, hugs, and prayers to you and your family.

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