January Birthday

Updated on November 24, 2008
M.B. asks from Lewisville, TX
32 answers

My daughter has a January birthday and will turn one in 2009. First birthdays have always been a big deal in my family. Most others are small, but number one is a big one. The problem I'm having is that first Christmases are also traditionally a big deal, too. Personally, I don't care about the toys or presents, but I'm baffled about what to do since these two will come so close together. All of the rest of my family has birthdays further away from Christmas than this. We don't rent out places or anything, but the extended family always likes to get together for stuff like this. My son had about 20 family members at his 1st birthday. Should I just announce that we should combine first Christmas and first birthday or should I hold off on my daughter's birthday until February? Any other ideas?

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So What Happened?

Well, overwhelmingly everyone said to keep the two separate. I've decided to do something the last weekend in January as there is a family wedding in Houston two weeks before and my husband works the next weekend. That'll be almost five weeks after Christmas. I realized that even I would be sad not to have separate first Christmas and first birthday pictures for the scrapbooks. Thanks!

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

i have a jan. b-day. DON'T combine it with Christmas! Always keep it seperate! (i know she's only gonna be one, but i'd still keep it a seperate occassion!
good luck!

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D.D.

answers from Dallas on

I have my birthday December 21st and always hated having it combined with Christmas. I would suggest keeping the two separated so family doesn't get in the habit of putting the two together. I was even disappointed if my birthday presents were wrapped in Christmas paper. I say have the party on the actual birthday or slightly later in January.

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K.V.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I have the same problem my older daughter's birthday is Dec 28th so we have run into the same problem. She will be three this year and I decided after having the past two birthday parties on her birthday that we will have a small family party on that day and then her actually party the first or second weekend in January once the holiday's have died down some. It is very tough. My other daughter is in February so I am hoping that will be easier.

Kim

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

My birthday is Jan. 7, and I always felt very cheated that it was no big deal in my family. Often I was presented with a gift at Christmas and told it was for my birthday as well. I was given the choice of when to open it. My siblings never had that issue. On the actual day of my birthday, we usually went out to eat, as we did for everyone's birthday.

My son's birthday is Dec. 21. Depending on what's happening, we sometimes celebrate it early, but we ALWAYS make sure it is HIS day. I have strongly discouraged anyone in my family from combining the two for him. I'm afraid if you combine the first birthday and Christmas, it will be expected in the future.

Enjoy!

1 mom found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

When is January is her birthday?

EDIT: Another thought on the gifts. We are at the age where we do not do gifts when daughter has a party. However, in the past when children would give her gifts, I would pull a few of those gifts out and then selectively "hide" gifts. In June or so when she was bored, I would pull out these new toys she got for her bday and she enjoyed that. Christmas and bday close together can get overwhelming for the child when there are a lot of gifts. They dont truly appreciate all the toys and goodies because there are so many. By spreading it out, they also get special treats in the summer.

I am in agreement with other posters...KEEP her day set aside for HER and DO NOT let anyone talk about combining days or gifts. It is HER day.

My soon to be 14 yr old was born on 12/27. It is close to Christmas but it is HER day and we always celebrate on her day. We've never had issues with anyone not showing up to a party because most parents are ready for a break 2 days after Christmas!!

Unlike you, we do not have family here so it is not a huge family issue for anyone but us. We invite friends and celebrate her day every 12/27. I'm in the midst of a blowout 14th bday party on the 27th now.

Enjoy her!! They grow up too fast.

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B.M.

answers from Abilene on

You have received some very good ideas but I just have to speak up on this. I have some experience with birthdays close to Christmas. My granddaughter's birthday is Jan 3 and mine is Dec 26. Please, never skip or combine her birthday. This may not seem like a big deal to some people, but to your daughter it will be. Granted, she is turning one and will not remember, but for adults, it would be the start of a habit. First birthdays are very important so make sure she has a big day. If your family is like mine, they will be asking what type of gifts to get her which would be great for you. But never let anyone give her a gift that is for both until she is much older. I turned 45 last year and it was the first time my mother had ever given me a gift for both. It was a very expensive gift but she still felt bad doing it. She even wrapped it half w/Christmas wrap and birthday wrap. As people have stated, our children do not choose when they are born, so their day should be treated just like all the other children in the family.

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L.S.

answers from Tyler on

Maybe this is different for you, but we live 100's of miles from my family. So, I feel fortunate that my kid's bday's are near holidays. We are going to be together anyway and so we celebrate their birthday's at the holiday. But, they are "separate" events. It's not like we do a birthday cake and then turn around and open Xmas presents. We set one day for the bday and it is certainly NOT on Xmas day.

-L.

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F.P.

answers from Dallas on

My son has a early January birthday, but we have always celebrated it seperately from Christmas. I would celebrate your daughter's birthday as close as possible to her real birthday. Only exception is if you have out of town family members attending both occasions. Your daughter's birthday is her special day and should not be celebrated with another holiday or a month later. My son has always been happy to have another celebration right after Christmas that was just for him. My mother is also a January birthday and we have a seperate celebration with her.

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

When is your daughters birthday in January? My opinion is that you need to have a birthday party for your daughter close to or on her birthday. It isn't her fault that she was born close to Christmas. I think if you combine them you will reget it since it is such a big deal to you. The really big party for her will only come one time a year so enjoy it because she will never be one again. I understand where you are coming from because my son's birthday is Dec.10th. Good luck and have fun on which ever one you decide to do.

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

Please don't combined the two. I grew up with my birthday very close to christmas.....Dec 19th, AND shared it with my older sister. Nothing was more aggrivating than my friends and family combining my birthday and christmas gifts! They got a brthday AND christmas celebration so why shouldn't I have the same? This might seem a bit trivial but trust me, its not a good idea to let family and friends start thinking now that combining these two events is a good idea.

I also have a child whose birthday is in the first week of January and though sometimes its difficult he always has a seperate celebration. I mean I wouldn't make my daughter combine hwr with Christmas because her birthday is in November.

If gifts are an issue, request no gifts or small monetary gifts only. Or request eveyone to bring non-perishable food items to donate to a food bank which I'm sure they will need right after the holidays. Just something to think about.

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A.W.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter's birthday is Jan.7. She is now 10. Our family also makes a big deal of 1st Christmas's and birthday's.
I think it cheat's the child to combine both. Since she would not know the difference now waiting a month or so would be okay. I always try to get my daughter to have her party later in the year but she never wants to wait. Good Luck!

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K.T.

answers from Dallas on

Are you worried about a toy overload? My daughters birthday is Jan. 16 so I know what you're going through with that. In the past it's been horrible with all the toys. We have huge familys so by the time Christmas was over with she already had plenty of stuff! I'd say you have a few options-with her being so young you could just ask for clothes for mainly clothes for Christmas and then that way she gets more some toys from Santa and then when her birthday rolls around she can get a few more. Also, I've known people that put back some of the toys that their kids get for later in the year. So when she gets tired of playing with one set, you can put that away and get something else down for her to play with.

And don't combine!!!! My birthday is right after Thanksgiving and my brothers was 2 days after Christmas. Both of us had our family 'combine' our gift into one at Christmas which I didn't think was fair because I wasn't getting anything 'extra' for the birthday part of it you know. Celebrate her birthday on her birthday and have her party as close to it as possible! Make her day special for her being here!
Hope this helps!

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A.D.

answers from Dallas on

Do them separately! If the 1st birthday is a big deal in your family, keep it that way. It doesn't matter that it's in January not so far from Christmas. My son's birthday is December 14th and we still keep it a separate event, we still do a party before Christmas even though everyone is busy before the holidays. My cousin's birthday is on Christmas and we always did a separate gift opening and always had birthday cake to celebrate on Christmas Eve when we got together with that side of the family. Also, my grandfather's birthday was on Jan 1 and we ALWAYS made that a special celebration on Jan 1, even those that had been out partying hard the night before would show up, no matter that we had just seen everyone the week before. I think everyone will be happy to attend in January, it breaks up the monotony of winter and kicks those post holiday blues.

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E.K.

answers from Dallas on

I'm an early January birthday and hated it growing up. Now I don't really mind since I'm older, but I got presents that were "this is for christmas and b-day" and kids were always oot. I would highly recommend keeping them separate. I know it's more work for you, but birthdays will not be special if you combine...trust me. My girl is a late December b-day and I promised myself that I will never do that to her....I have her birthdays a week before to make sure her friends will be in town.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

I would not hold off until Feb. just pick the weekend in Jan. and have her party. Your family is going to love celebrating her 1st birthday. As far as gifts go you know she will get a ton of gifts for Christmas so maybe ask for clothes or whatever else she might need.

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A.T.

answers from Dallas on

As far as toy etc, at that age ask for savings bonds, cans of food to donate to local pantry, or something like that. Maybe you can look into when Super Bowl Sunday is and combine that with your daughters bday. Might be a bit to sporty for a girl but youcan decorate tv with football stuff and another room with girly birthday things.

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J.L.

answers from Dallas on

Have a "book" Birthday party. I would not combine it or delay it. Her birthday is special and needs to be celebrated. I have had book birthdays for my children before. On the invitation specify that it is a book birthday. It is a great way to add books to your child's bookshelf.

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter's birthday is December 30th. I have always had her party the weekend between Christmas & New Years. We too, are close with extended family, and they are always invited. And they understand, your child is special no matter what time of the year it is. It's not the child'd fault when they arrived. And they always come to the party with gifts in tow. Your problem is finding room in your house for Christmas and Birthday presents all at the same time. I had your same struggle, but you'll figure out what's best for you and your family. Good Luck.

D.D.

answers from Dallas on

If presents is the problem then just scale back at Christmas so that you have something to give her at Birthday. I do not understand the problem, I have a January birthday and it never interfere with Christmas. Essentially you are talking about two people with a birthday. If your birthday were in December and your sister's birthday was in January, would your parents skip one? No, they are both equally important and they would treat them as so.

D.
SAHM of three: 19,18,and 5.
Home Baker,Crafter, and Candy Maker. Married to the same wonderful man for almost 12 years.

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

I think if everyone is going to be together for Christmas anyway, there's no harm in doing th b-day as well, at least this time around.

That being said, generally speaking I am not a fan of combining the birthday with the holiday. I have two children with January birthdays (8th and 12th) so I know how you're feeling. And we did celebrate their first birthdays separate from Christmas . . . it was just another excuse for everyone to get together!

I was influenced by a friend I grew up with whose birthday was Dec. 29 and she hated when people acknowledged X-Mas/birthday in one fell swoop. For most of us, they are two distinctly separate events, and so I've always felt we shouldn't shortchange anyone just because their birthday falls on or near a big holiday. It just so happens that my birthday often falls on or near Mother's Day (I was born on Mother's Day) but my family echos my sentiment that they are two separate celebrations.

And as for gifts, ask your friends and family to invest in her future vs. giving her toys. Take the cash and put it in a college savings fund.

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

I have the same situation with my little girl. I just push her bday party back to the end of January. You could also do the beginning of February. Enough time has passed by then, that they don't feel so close together. Birthdays are special and that's her one day to feel that it's all about her, so I would not combine. Also, I always put 3/4 of her bday and Cmas present toys up in her closet and bring them down throughout the year. You will be glad you did in the summer when she is bored with all of her toys. :-)

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N.H.

answers from Dallas on

Do the chinese new year... Which usually falls in january. Have chinese food, fortune cookies and everyone can read their animal sign. Her bday will be a fun way to ring in the new year. Also, the chinese have a tradition of the red envelope (check it out on line)which would be good since gifts will be really hard. You can open it to life wishes and blessing instead of just money.

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D.M.

answers from Dallas on

Just a side comment not related to your question ... I have a January birthday and so does my sister. Growing up we celebrated "unbirthdays" (a.k.a. half birthdays) in July. So, my birthday is January 12 and my unbirthday is six months later on July 12. On that day we would have a small cake just for our immediate family and I would get one gift.

I think my mom started it so we would have a special day way outside the holiday season. I even remember a song from "Alice and Wonderland" about "unbirthdays". So, that's just a suggestion for a possible family tradition from someone who knows how hectic January birthdays can be. Happy early birthday to your daughter!

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A.O.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,

My son's birthday is January 19th, and for his 1st birthday last year we had his party on his birthday and went all out on decorations at our house and we had a lot of people come for it. We bought him a couple of toys for Christmas and then got a lot of great deals on after Christmas sales for birthday gifts! A close friend of mine has his birthday on Dec. 24th, and he hates it because no one ever made a big deal on his birthday and he can't really do anything with friends because everyone is with their families etc and his family combined it. I don't suggest that in later years. My best friend's son was born Dec. 21st, and they hold his party (he's 2, turning 3) separately and make it his special day. It's worked out with her family so far!

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K.J.

answers from Dallas on

I think you should do christmas as one and then do her birthday as another one. If you combine them and you are anything like me about making your childs birthday special, you might regret it in the long run. Do her 1st christmas as you normally would with your family and then plan her birthday in January. If your family is big on first things for babies then they should understand why you have them seperate. I know it would be a lot of work for you, but it will be worth it in the end. Good luck and I hope things work out for you!

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S.A.

answers from Dallas on

I have a January birthday (5) and my parents always made it a point to celebrate my birthday on my birthday, and to have separate gifts for Christmas and birthday (no combining allowed!). As an adult, I understand the financial dilemma of so many gifts in such a short period of time, but it is doable for most people, and a birthday is important. I am really thankful that my parents never combined Christmas and birthday presents (nor allowed others to do so), and that they considered my day important and special enough to be celebrated on that day.

I will say that, as I got older, I chose for the sake of ease to celebrate my birthday on the Saturday night before my birthday, but that was my choice (and actually moved it closer to Christmas).

I would have celebrated your daughter's birthday on her birthday. Another suggested celebrating 6 months later, which is an option. My parents offered me that, but I *love* my birthday and didn't want to celebrate it in July, which would have been in conjunction with the 4th since my birthday is the 5th.

Good luck in your decision!

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T.N.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.,
Our oldest son was born on Dec. 22nd. We told our family when he was born that we will not do his birthday at Christmas because he needed to have his own day. Although it can be difficult arranging family birthday parties - especially around the holidays it is something very important to us and has become that way for him. As for the first birthday and Christmas, I would really encourage your family to schedule a separate day for both. I know it is hard because everyone is so busy but this will help for future birthdays as well. An idea we started was for our extended families to have "birthday buddies". The majority of the family has someone else's birthday within a few weeks of theirs so we find a date in the middle to have a family birthday party for the "buddies". This way the immediate family can celebrate on the birthday person's actual day and then we have another party at another time. This has worked out well because with family it is obviously cost efficient and everyone feels like they are getting an extended birthday. As for our son's friend parties, we just do them when we can but try to do it within that week. Yes, it's difficult because of vacations, etc...but we do our best to make him feel that despite being born so close to Jesus' birthday it is a day about him. This also allows us to keep our focus on Jesus. The bottom line, your child did not ask to be born so close to the holidays so don't put off his/her day because of it. You can make a tradition of your own and have a nice family dinner with cake on his day but make Christmas totally separate. I hope this helps.

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

Go ahead and have your daughter's first birthday celebration on her day. Then as the years progress, the immediate family can have her day and then she can have a celebration with other family members/friends at a later date.

My daughter's birthday is New Year's Eve. Imagine that dilemma! Anyways, I went ahead and had a family gathering on her special first birthday. Then as the years progressed, I would have slumber parties for her with a few friends... Now she goes out with her friends sans mom... she's in her mid 20's!!!!

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M.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hi M.. I know what you are going through. My 16 yr. old daughter's b-day is on Jan. 3. When she used to have parties I had a tendency to wait until at leat the second weekend and usually the third of the month. That gives people a couple of weeks to "recover" from the holidays and they are more likely to attend. It's tough with a b-day that close because as they get older they realize how close it is and that sometimes the two things get lumped together or the b-day gets forgotten. Good luck and happy holidays!

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

Your daughter won't care what day it is on her first birthday. Her only memory of it will come from pictures and videos. It's really a FAMILY celebration on the first birthday.

If it works best for your family to have a great big celebration while everyone's together at Christmas time, then go for it! This doesn't have to establish the tradition for the rest of her life.

Later, her birthday can be celebrated on her REAL birthday, once she's old enough to recognize that it's her special day.

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J.D.

answers from Dallas on

For my daughter's first, we asked that no one give gifts. I'm really particular about what she wears and she doesn't need any more toys. At age one, she won't remember the gifts anyway.

Celebrate your baby on her birthday. It's her first and it should be a celebration of her life and the gift she is to you and your family!

:)

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

My son's birthday is December 30th so we have always celebrated his half birthday. On his actual birth day I usually make him a cake and give him a small gift or take him out to dinner and then we do a bigger celebration on June 30th. He is a teenager now and has told me several times over the years that he enjoys doing it this way since his birthday is in the middle of the holidays and since his friends/family are either out of town or busy during this time.

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