Is My Baby Bored?

One of my favorite books says that at this stage, because they are unable to manipulate objects as well as they'd like, they do get restless. But their vision is improving and they like to sit in a high chair looking out a window, or better yet, go out for a stroller ride. Just stay away from video if you're worried about a short attention span! LOL

The author is Burton L. White and he and his research team spent decades observing families *in their own homes* to see what works and what doesn't. He has *very specific* advice for toys, activities, and discipline methods that are actually effective for each age and stage. The 2 books we have of his are: The New First Three Years of Life; and Raising a Happy, Unspoiled Child. You will be glad you read them! Best wishes.

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Babies naturally have short attentions spans. And boredom will always be a part of life.

In response to both your post and Elizabeth's, I suspect that the reason the first baby requires so much more attention is because the mother has created that situation. By the second baby, she has learned that she doesn't have to respond to every cry for attention and that if left to his own devices a baby will learn to entertain themselves.

That may sound harsh but it's really just normal. A first baby is a new experience and usually one long looked forward to. We want to spend as much time as we can with our new baby. This gives the baby a chance to "train" us to pay a whole lot of attention to them. We don't give them a chance to teach themselves to entertain themeselves. And once we realize that we can't spend all of our time with baby, baby is used to it and resists change.

Changing his need to have your nearly constant entertainment will be difficult. I suggest providing him with a large variety of toys and/or activities in one room. I know there is a controversy over having a baby watch TV but I think it has it's place. Baby Einstein videos give the baby a variety of experiences in learning how to see their environment. Have the video playing some of the time along with allowing access to other activities.

Before her baby(s) became more mobile, my daughter did use the TV for short periods of entertainment so that she could have a shower or do some other task while her baby(s) were confined and focused on the TV pictures.

I do believe that a healthy mother/baby relationship is baby focused but the relationship also must be balanced so that the mother's needs are also met. Keeping the baby happy all of the time is detrimental to the baby's ability to become an independant child and then adult.

Breaking the habit of always entertaining the baby will be difficult to break. The only suggestion I have is to read one of the parenting books such as Baby Whisperer. I've seen that book recommended often on this site. I haven't read it. Maybe a different book would address this difficulty better. Hopefully other mothers will have some suggestions.

I advocate frequent play with baby but the baby also needs frequent time to learn things for themselves.

I'm referring to a fear of one's baby being bored and therefore keeping him constantly entertained. Babies, just as adults, need some down time, during which they do not have to do something. Nearly constantly entertaining ones self or a baby could mean a lack of comfort with a period of inactivity. Letting the baby fuss some will allow them to get comfortable with being with just themselves and allow them ways to find ways to entertain themselves.

Yes, he wants to be with mom. However it's not helpful to be with mom every minute; especially when mom is tired because she can't figure out how to keep him amused. There is a balance.

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No, your baby is not bored. His attention span is normal for his age. Also he wants to be with his mother more than anything else.

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This sounds like normal behaviour for a 7 mo to me. With my girls (2 and 6 months) I babywear when we're at home and that has helped me a lot and kept them entertained. You can find more info at www.mamatoto.org or www.thebabywearer.com.

I prefer Mei Tais, and a good website for those is http://kozycarrier.homestead.com/

Oh boy, I can relate. My youngest was just like that. he is 8 1/2 now and just diagnosed with adhd. He is a really good kid but you have to watch them every second when they are little. When he was about your sons age he would get so mad that he could not get up and run with his older brother. He and his friends would run by playing and you could see Connor lean like he was trying to go with them then get sooo mad and scream because he couldnt. He wanted constand stimulation. I dealt with it by putting him in an exersaucer to keep him upright and his legs busy. when he was bored with that I would put him in one of those baby back packs for hiking. I would wear him around on my back in that and he was a happy camper. He loved it. It worked for awhile. It was nice when he started walking because it was a good way to keep him out of trouble for awhile when I was busy too. It worked for 6 or 8 months. But it gave me some of my sanity back.

Babies have powerful instincts to explore; that's how they learn the world around them. The best thing you could do is totally babyproof the house. Put up anything you don't want broken, and anything not safe for him. Put child locks on all the cupboards you don't want him in; keep doors closed if you don't want him in the rooms. Maybe keep one cupboard in the kitchen that he can have access to, with wonderful things like an old pot and wooden spoon, and old cottage cheese cartons and stuff. Also keep the TV off, and you'll have the smartest kid on the block, and his attention span will be superior. If you do all these things, you eliminate the need to tell him "no" all day, and he is free to explore and entertain himself. Good luck. I got this advice from John Rosemond's book Making the Terrible Twos Terrific.

Is he your first? I found with my first he had to be entertained constantly. and it was by me. I couldnt put him down with toys, he wouldnt play with them if i walked away to go do housework he would scream and cry until i came back. the only thing he would sit in for more then five mintues alone was his swing. once he grew out of that i was done for. With my second though i found he played best by himself. if i tried to get down on the floor with him he would crawl away. he could play for hours with one toy by himself. so i think it is just order of birth honestly. Once the weather gets better i would take him out for walks..he sounds like he would like that alot. but until then i think unless some one is way more creative then me you just sort of have to roll with it. kids change day to day so he may even grow out of it before you even know it and he will be ok playing by his self with the same toys over and over.

I have recently finished my associates degree in early childhood and I can reassure you that what your baby is doing is completly normal. Infants and children learn about their world by touching, tasting and doing. All you can do is make sure that your home is safe to let him explore. The baby toys are great but I think the curiositiy of learning about the surrounding environment will sometimes win over.

Hi C.,
Sounds like you have quite the little explorer! I don't think it's unnatural for him to want to check out new things and to not stay focused very long. It is my understanding that babies will play with toys that challenge them just enough. Try giving him more sophisticated toys with something for him to "figure out" without it being too sophisticated for him. Or, take him outside and let him play in the dirt :-)
~J.

Your baby is probably whip smart. My 3rd is like that and we call him demon baby because he can destroy ANYTHING he wants to. Is it just me or does he always go for the 8-inch butcher knife as soon as I open the dishwasher?

Perhaps you need to advance the level of your toys. Or you could start giving him activities for older babies.
-S.

I would involve him in everything you do. Sit him on the floor next to you while folding clothes. Put him in a backpack for other chores around the house. Let him play with measuring cups while you're cooking, while talking to him. Once he gets crawling and is independant, he'll likely be much easier to entertain as he can start finding his own fun (much to your dismay, I can guarantee) If I were a baby, sitting alone playing with toys would be very boring too. Babies need people, just like us older ones do.

wow 10 minutes! thats longer than my 9 month old play with a ny one toy! yeah its normall. try to find a local playgroup that you can join I reccomend either MOMS club international http://www.momsclub.org/ or meet up www.meetup.com I have been a members of MOMS club for 3 years now and it has been wonderfull.

I'm a stay at home mom of one adorable 2 yr old girl. I don't know if this will help, but she was the same way. I don't know what's "normal," children are all so different. My daughter is just really social. She wants to play with another person, not just toys. This can be exhuasting, I know. As she has gotten older, she will play a bit more on her own, on and off. It really is easier than when she was your baby's age. But she always would prefer to play with another adult. She seems to have high need for this kind of interaction.
Some things that helped me a lot were just getting out of the house to the park or on a walk, or arranging play dates with other moms for some adult interaction and social opportunities for my daughter. The number one thing that saved my sanity for a while was taking my daughter to Gymboree Play and Music, worth every penny! They have classes for very young babies and up. Or, if this isn't available in your area, look online or ask around for other mom and baby type classes. Library story times are fun too.
Sometimes you just can't haul your baby out, though. We have to get things done around the house! All I can say is just hang in there, it does gradually get easier as they get older. One other thing that saved me was Baby Einstein DVD's. My daughter loved Baby Mozart pretty early on. I know some people don't want their baby watching anything, but I felt good about some of the Baby Einstein shows. Some babies aren't interested though, especially boys, it seems. But you could try it!
I think my daughter has a wonderful personality which has been hard to deal with now but is really a great thing in the long run. It's exhausting sometimes, I feel like she needs more interaction than I can give sometimes. But I just keep trying. We have a very loving, close attachment,and I do feel blessed to be able to be with her almost all the time.
Hang in there! Hope this helps a bit.

When all else fails... pot and pans and plastic spoons and spatulas, oh, and earplugs!

=)

Not to fear. My daughter didn't sit till 7 months, didn't crawl till 10 months, or walk till 17 months. And, afraid to say, their time spans will be 5-10min or so for the next year. A lot of kids don't really sit and focus at length until around 2yrs. He's perfectly normal. That said, you're doing a great thing of taking him around the house with you. He is soaking in everything you show him so in addition to toys and music and books, just talk to him about what you're doing. I carried my kids in a Bjorn or backpack around the house when they wouldn't lay by themselves. Backpacks help build neck/body strength for sitting too (opposed to laying in a swing). Let him touch the water when you wash dishes. Lay him in warm clothes from the dryer as you fold them. Try to delay non active stuff (like computer work) until he's sleeping. Sit him up in a Bumbo or a Boppy (on the floor of course). Prop up books next to him. GO OUTSIDE. The biggest help for me was getting out of the house - do grocery shopping, parks, library, look at the animals at PetCo, get the mail together, etc. Not necessary but also look into short classes at Little Gym, Community Center, Gymboree, etc.. Having just one "outing" a day was a huge help for me. Once he's crawling I highly recommend "The Toddler's Busy Book" by Trish Kuffner. Give yourself permission to just lay on the floor and play with him. Dishes will still be there tomorrow. :)

Is your baby crawling yet? If not, I bet that when he becomes mobile, you will have a much easier time. I have a very active 12 month-old. Before he could move on his own, he got frustrated very easily. I think that there were so many things that he wanted to do, but couldn't. As soon as he started crawling, he became so much more content. Now he entertains himself quite well by exploring every inch of our apartment! Now I just have to make sure his environment is safe, and let him go for it! I predict that things will become much easier in a couple of months. In the meantime, remember that it's okay to let him cry and be frustrated sometimes.

Try inventing games to practice holding his attention for longer periods that involve singing, tickling, reading or hide and seek.Do this several times a day. He is very little and everything is so new. Strap him to you and take long walks that involve paying slow quiet attention to things. If you can, get a "sling". This is a great way to carry the baby and keep facial contact. (Birth and Beyond is a wonderful shop in Seattle that provides great tools and support for moms) There is a special closeness that you'll getwith a sling. He will be still and connected to you...literally. One caution, try not to fill in the blanks for him all the time. You don't actually have to amuse him all the time and shouldn't. Let him BE in his surroundings more. If you are the Chief Entertainment Officer for a 7 month old, you'll be really nuts as he gets older and needs you to manufacture fun for him. Let him learn to pull from his own resources. Have fun C.!

C.-
Your baby is learning :) He is taking in everything he can at one time. My son, who is nine, was very much the same way. He was very active and still is. I have had to find something of interest to him to keep him busy or he is all over the house. He is on the swim team. My daughter, who is now 7 months, is much more mellow. I think its a boy thing. But its all normal. Each child is different. Another little word of advice - don't believe everything you hear regads to ADHD. I had so many other parents and teachers ask if my son was ADHD. It is so easily diagnosed these days incorrectly. Boys just seem to have a lot of energy. It's how you direct that energy that is important. But don't worry! Your son is perfectly normal. He is just soaking in his surroundings.
-A.

Hi C.-
This IS normal and with all the great advice given, I can't add much. Just be patient for his growth and development...it's getting to be so much fun with my 21-month old. But just another angle, if a child is tired (or anyone, for that matter), attention spans are shorter. I have no idea of your life, lifestyle, sleeping patterns, but I've done some reading about how important quality and quantity of sleep is. I just thought I'd add my 2 cents about how attention span can be related to sleep. "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" is a book for reference if you are interested. A.

He sounds bored, and a lot like my 6 month old. I've been told by many that my baby is normal, just extremely smart and curious. I find that going for long walks helps with the monotany. I also recommend running errands so he gets exposed to new environments. Don't worry too much about him being bored, he'll eventually learn to entertain himself although he'll probably fuss until he figures it out.
Good luck!

I am no expert--I only have one baby. He is 15 months old now and still does not sit still. He watches absolutely no TV, so we are always having the same problem you seem to be having. From talking to other people, I think this is extremely normal behavior, especially for little boys (I have witnessed little girls sit still in their mommys' laps while little boys run around like mini monsters), and EXTRA especially if you have a baby who can be classified as "busy". Yes, it is tiring, but from what others have told me, little boys are like this for a while, but get easier as they get older.

I don't have any advice, but I want you to know that you are not alone in your struggle to entertain. I too have a 7 month old son, who is in constant need of something new to do or look at. I frequently wish that he could be like the other children I know near his age that just sit quietly on their mother's lap and watch the world around them. But alas, he has his own personality and I must try to keep up. Good luck!

You do not have to keep him amused. He seems to be doing it himself. He is normal.!!!

He sounds perfectly normal! Enjoy!

Oh, I'm so glad my little one isn't the only one who was like this!! She spent a LOT of time in her Baby Bjorn. The stinker didn't learn to crawl until the day she was 9 months though...she wouldn't even roll over, until that day! Let me just tell you - things got a LOT better after that. She could follow me, she could grab the things she wanted, she could explore...and she was SO proud of herself. Also, she LOVED walks in the stroller...because things are always changing. You'd think a kid like that would like TV, but I never found that to be the case with my little one - too much sitting still!

Does that help? Hang in there!

Sounds totally normal to me. They have attention spans of gnats. My son is the same way. Try going to your library's story time, or other baby classes in your area. It will help tire him out.

Short attention spans are normal, just as is wanting to be moved around is normal. Like another reader, I have found slings (I recommend the Peanut Shell, Baby Bjorn, and Ergo) to be an excellent way to keep baby satisfied while I do things around the house. My little guy is most happy when I'm wearing him while vacuuming; he can even fall asleep during this particular chore. A friend of mine recommended the book, Playful Parenting by Lawrence J Cohen (on sale for $10.17 on amazon.com) that you might want to check out.

Being overly-attentive isn't harmful to your baby but it can make you feel a bit crazy when your baby doesn't seem to be responding to your efforts. Some things to try that have worked for me include:

1. photo shoots - we take photos daily and sometimes just the sight of the camera, since he knows it means mommy time, can have a calming effect

2. mini movies - I'll come up with a concept for a 30 second to 1 minute movie, shoot it, and have my baby be the star (the upside of this is that you get lots of cute footage of your baby doing ordinary things but your brain gets a workout because you've been thinking of the storyline, etc.)

3. wearing the baby - I even do this while cooking, however, when I come in contact with a hot oven or boiling water, I'll set my baby down before continuing

4. buying/borrowing mind-stimulating toys - such as activity mats, exersaucers, johnny jump-ups. I move the exersaucer in the kitchen (I like to bake) and he'll play for a while before getting very upset

5. rotating toys - pick a few and put away the rest, sometime later (a few days, a week, etc.) swap those toys for some "new" ones

6. go to the mall - window shopping can be a great way to keep baby entertained without costing a fortune

7. playing music and dancing as opposed to watching t.v. (there was a recent article published in the journal Pediatrics that suggest using educational videos under the age of 2 might do more harm than good because there is a link between high video exposure and attention problems)

Good luck. I get that fried brain feeling every now and then. I would recommend trying to get a night off, even if it only means you get an hour in a bubble bath while someone else watches your baby, to recharge.

hello C. a 7 month old baby is not supposed to sit still .Let him do all the belly crawling and creeping he needs to do to get to his toys.put music ,swing with him ,move with him ,babies need a lot of movement to organize their brain.give him pots and pans to play with,that will stimulate his imagination,don't let him watch any TV ,it creates very passive babies,he will find ways to amuse himself ,let him experience what you think is boredom lovingly C.

All three of my boys did the same thing. I think what happens is they've realized there are new things to discover around every corner. I think it's a sign of intelligence! However, it can drive you nuts sometimes. I made the mistake of buying a new toy everytime I noticed the baby was bored with my first child. $$$! So, I learned that babies love kinetics. Boxes, cups, bowls, big plastic kitchen spoons, things that crinkle, etc. You know, I also learned not to cater to them too much. It's great to play with them and help them discover new stuff, but they need to learn that Mommy can't constantly be there every second they want to do something else. If they don't learn this, then it's a world of trouble later on. What I do is make them wait just a few minutes at first, then expand on that. I say "okay honey, mommy willl play in a minute". Even if they fuss. Just keep talking in a soothing tone. Also, if you notice they are just fussing to try to control - like faking it, or trying to see how far they can push you, it's not too early to tell them no and explain why. He may not understand all the words, but he'll get the meaning. Babies are smarter than we give them credit for. Hope this helps!

Oh, and it wouldn't hurt to mention it to the pediatrician.

That it very normal!! We have two boys. They were and still are that way. Always on the move. Not much holds their attention for long. Once they were able to move on their own, my life got a little easier in one sence but harder in other ways.
I don't have a lot of ideas, just keep lots of things at his reach. Also remember if you have several thing you could rotate out from time to time. That seemed to help some.

He wants you to interact with him not toys. Nothing compares to mommy's and daddy's attention. I'm sure you are already doing it but try kicking it up a notch - when he's fed, changed, and awake - have a solid chunk of time where all you are doing is being together - one on one completely engaged. When I started carving out more of this one-on-one time with my daughter - I really noticed a shift in her overall mood. I still do to this day.

bring baby into the kitchen or where ever you are working and sit him in the highchair so that he can see what you are doing and talk him though all of your steps. "this is dish soap it is green it makes bubbles and helps to clean the dishes. this is a red spoon. etc" it will help to stimulate brain activity and verbal skills and is great for getting them excited to help. My 2 year old helped make zuccini bread last night and couldn't wait to eat it this morning.
Also getting out of the house to do anything, shop, walk, or even sit in the stroller while you weed the garden.
Find different sights, sounds, textures, smells to keep things interesting and get the house babyproofed now, if yours is like mine he'll be climbing on top of and into everything in the next few months. and anything your eye level down is fair game.

It sounds to me like you have a very bright young man. Have you stared to teach him sign language yet? This might be something to help you with communicating with him, and yes they can learn at that age.
Yes this sounds normal, once a child learns that they can get up and move... that is all they want to do.
Make sure your house is baby proff, get down on the floor and look around from his level and think of what you might want to grab, pull over, or play with.
You can also help him learn clean up.. I use to sing the barny clean up song for my kids, and they would clean... if only it still worked as a teen... LOL.
Puzzles, are another way to keep their little brain working.
Have fun....

Ohh and remember, to take time for yourself. When he is down for a nap, or when hubby gets home and can handle him for a little while take some time for yourself. You can go into the bathtub, ad bubbles, candles, and music... turn out the lights, and just relax...... You deserve it!
I have taken just me dates... Go out for coffee, or a PTA meeting, or ???

Hugz
B.

Your son is perfectly normal. At 7 months old, we can't expect our babies to focus on an activity for an hour or more at a time. Their attention will continue to be short for a long time yet. It's okay to let him spend some time without you trying to entertain him all the time. Put him on his tummy on a blanket with a few toys nearby. He will spend some time with toys, some time trying to move around, etc. Something that is beneficial to both of you is going for a walk. Put him in a baby sling or a stroller and get some fresh air and a change of scenery. It will not only keep him occupied, it will uplift your mood and you'll benefit from the fresh air and exercise. :)