Include Unborn Child on Christmas Card??

Updated on October 20, 2010
K.J. asks from Spring Hill, TN
20 answers

Hi moms. I am a little stuck on what to do. We recently found out that I am pregnant, but I am still in my first trimester. We were about to make our Christmas cards since we can get them 50% off if we buy early. I am conflicted on whether to include our unborn baby on the card or not. Most of our family doesn't know we are expecting yet, so we thought it would be a cute surprise to receive at Christmas. However, we are still in the high risk time line for miscarriage. I have had one successful pregnancy with very little complications and a beautiful daughter from it. I have also not shown any signs at all of miscarriage. However, between trying for several months and finally conceiving plus having 3 friends miscarry in the last four months so I am more wary than I have ever been. I'm afraid if we put this child on our Christmas card that we will miscarry possibly even before we send out the cards. However, we just really liked the idea of announcing our pregnancy to our family this way, especially since we live on the East Coast and most of our family lives across the country on the West Coast. What do you ladies think about it?

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Personally, I would not. Wait until arrival and send out some super cute announcements then. It's almost like including the new baby on the Christmas card will steal the announcement thunder! Congrats!

4 moms found this helpful
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J.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

I wouldn't put that on a Christmas card. If you lose the pregnancy you don't want that reminder on a Christmas card. I would just call and or email family members.

*EDITED TO SAY* Losing a baby at any point in a pregnancy is devastating. There are other ways to express that joy without putting it on a Christmas card. You may not lose but if you do lose the baby do you really want that reminder on a Christmas card? I lost my 1st at 18 weeks and the grief was terrible to put it mildly so while it is true you will probably not lose you want to consider if you do. Just something to think about. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

L.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I would wait. No reason to rush it, especially with being so early in your pregnancy.

You'll have every year in the future to include this baby on your cards.

Just make this year a really special one, since it will be the last year of your family just as it is now!

Congratulations!

3 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

I would not do this. Announce your pregnancy when it is safe to the people you really need to tell, but not in your Holiday greetings. This would just be very strange to me and oddly personal for a greeting card. You can find a cute way to tell your family, but don't send this to your husbands boss...or your neigbor or your college roomate...it just seems like too much information.

M.

3 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I'm with Denise P.

Congratulations and I hope everything works out for you.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Savannah on

I would buy them now and include the surprise announcement if that's how you want to let folks know. I think it's a cute way to do it. If you do happen to miscarry before you send them out, you can order new ones & I don't think the extra expense will be your top concern at a time like that (or even getting Xmas cards out at all for that matter).

In my opinion, even though the first trimester is riskiest, it is much more likely that you will carry to term than not & I feel a little that saying "but I might miscarry" is a kinda like saying "but my husband might get hit by a bus before I have a chance to send the cards out"

A sad event might happen, but don't count on it happening & if it does happen then have a plan b and send out different cards. Best wishes and health for your pregnancy! Congrats!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Personally, I would wait and not mention baby. I am one that went and told the world and then miscarried, so now I am more cautious.

Oh, one cute way you could do it is to have a family pic of you guys in your pjs fixing cinnabuns.... ya know, 'a bun in the oven'! then baby would be included.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

I wouldn't do it. You can announce when you're further along!

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S.S.

answers from Boston on

I know how excited you must be to share that great news but I think I would hold off. I was in my second trimester around the holidays last year and we did not include it in our holiday card. It was rougher pregnancy and I was so thrilled when I got to send out my baby's birth announcement!!!

1 mom found this helpful
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S.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

What if you have the cards made without mentioning baby, and then right before you send them out (assuming the pregnancy is still viable) attach a note or copy of the ultrasound pic to the back of the card announcing your pregnancy.

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M.S.

answers from Raleigh on

Go ahead and get the cards that you want. By the time you send them, you'll be more settled about the timing of an announcement. If the unthinkable happens, you will have what - "wasted" or spent money on cards that you'll never use? I'm sure that will be the last thing on your mind if Christmas comes this year and you find that you are no longer expecting a new baby.

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C.W.

answers from Lexington on

you could order the cards without the baby's name, then if yyou decide you want to you could write it on there in cute writing.

1 mom found this helpful

J.B.

answers from Houston on

Personally I think it is a great and very cute idea:) From the moment I know I am pregs, I tell the fam and whoever I want. I don't worry about miscarriage. Losing a child would be devastating, whether it was in the womb or out. But regardless I think of any child as an equal family member at any age. So to me your new little one is just as alive, present and important as the rest of the family:) Announcing it in your Christmas card would be a great surprise and joy to the family. I truly don't worry about statistics. I think of it like this, most of us think more about crashing when we get on a plane but statistically more fatal crashes happen on the ground, yet we all drive everyday without the worry of an automobile crash. I never think of the statics of whether I will arrive back home alive when I go to the grocery store even though I know statistically most automobile crashes happen within a 25 mile radius of a persons home. So I said all that to say, if you want to announce, go for it without fear!! If you want to wait, no problem, some people are more private and keep things closer to the vest, so whatever you do, I say do it because it's what you want to do and not out of any sense of fear. Congrats on your new little one!!:)

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K.L.

answers from Des Moines on

I just found out that I am pregnant too and have decided that I am telling extended family thru our Christmas cards this year. I will be about 3 months along by that time and thought it was perfect timing. I think it's a great way to tell people!

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

For our first child, we had a picture of the ultrasound on it. For our second, we just put from each of our names, and baby coming May XX

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L.L.

answers from Topeka on

I did on all cards Birthdays Easter Christmas with all 3 of my kids nobody complained & I wasn't worried if I miscarried if I did they will still show their love & support & as they look back into their cards if they kept them they will see that their is a baby up in heavan they will see one day.
On Mother's Day I packed alot of gifts for my mom as she opened them one by one there was a baby bottle in there this is how she found out we were prego the looks on ewveryone's faces I can remember she turned to look at my hubby & he was laughing & smiling away he didn't know I did this

A.G.

answers from Houston on

awww, yes, thats cute to do that, i understand your concern but i would do it

R.G.

answers from Dallas on

I say go for it. By the time you mail them out you should be in the clear, or near there, right? I did this same thing last year...made up a simple little rhyme...Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to You
From Jeff, Becky, Presley and Baby #2

I hope all goes well for you. =)

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H.S.

answers from Johnson City on

I think it depends on who/what population you are sending your Christmas card to. If you plan on sending your family Christmas card only to family and close friends, then go for it - it's a cute idea. If you are planning on sending your Christmas card to acquaintances, and a larger "general" population of people such a bosses, coworkers, or friends you only come in contact with over the holidays - then I wouldn't.

You could always announce your pregnancy with family and friends by having your first child wearing a t-shirt that says "Big Sister" or by holding a sign etc. You could send that photo to family members if you choose not include the unborn baby on your family card. You could even include an ultrasound picture for family and close friends with your Christmas card.

Some things to consider: You mention that 3 of your friends have recently miscarried, do you think a Christmas card announcement could be hurtful to them in any way? Also, it is true that the risk for miscarriage increases with every child you bear. What if you did make the cards, and later miscarried? I think this could cause you additional stress and grief in the long run. I personally would wait until 12 weeks to announce the pregnancy, just to be safe. Whatever you decide, I wish you a very happy and healthy pregnancy. Congratulations!

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

I think it's a cute idea, but you're right about being in the high risk arena. We announced our last two pregnancies at 6 weeks and lost both of them a few days later. It's really a personal choice. If you do decide to put it on there, maybe write something like, Love, the ____ family (and one on the way!). Christmas is still a while off, and by then you won't be in such a high risk category. Maybe just don't finish them out until it's closer to that time.

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