I Need Help with Taking on Education

J.,
I am in this situation right now! I decided to take online classes because being a single mom of 3, I cant afford to pay someone to keep them while I go to classes. My first term of class was very difficult and I thought I was going to have to drop out (yet again). I found a great website that offers advice on how to get things under control so that you will have time to do the things that you want. It is www.flylady.net. She has a lot of good suggestions to keep you going, including scheduling time for yourself. The motto of this group is 15 minutes at a time. They offer ideas on lowering stress levels and getting things done in a timely manner.

I wish you the best of luck! My im screen name is ____@____.com, if you want to talk sometime.

Okay. Let me first begin by saying that anything worth having is worth working hard for. I have a 2yo boy, but when it's time to study seems like I have 6 two year olds.I go to school(to be a RN) and work fulltime. This is what works for me. My son is in daycare. So when mommy gets out school earier, he don't! He stays there. That is my study time. I do do the vast majority of my studying at night, but you do little seesions throughout the day it is equalivalent to one big study session and it is better. Just for a little proof. I used to study every night for about 1.5 hours and when it was time to test I would 80's. I just took a test Monday and this time I would do small frequent study sessions (about15-20 min at a time) throughout the day I gotta a 95. You retain information longer and plus you have greater chance of your kids leaving you alone for 20min then for an hour. As for the study partner, I know medical words b/c i use them daily. So if you need help with that, Let me know. Oh one more thing...You have an 11 and 7 year old. Have you explained to them how important school is to you and how you will need their help with the younger kids. That is also your husbands job also. I have a classmate who has 5 kids ranging from 17-6 and she is married. She said she at everyone down including he husband and explain what her going to school meant. She told me that it meant that the areas she fell short in, the family would have to help. It is hard, but you can't try to do everything you used to and go to school. You have to give up somethings. You are not Superwoman, but if you don't get help and relieve that sennse of overwhelmingness, it will turn to stress and you will give up. I have been there and I had to take a look back and re-ebaluate everything. It should be easier for you than me b/c you have help. It's just me. Good Luck and I know you can do it.

I am also working on getting my certificate in medical transcription. I am doing mine online. I know how hard it is. I only have 1 (a 5 month old) so I applaud you for tackling that with 4 kids. When I first started I was like "Oh yeah, this is only going take me 2 months at the most." Whatever. It's been over 2 months already and I am only just now one lesson away from the midterm. The reason it is taking me so long is that the only time that I actually get to work on it is when my daughter is taking a nap (and she's not all that great of a napper). I work at night 4 days a week so that is a no go. I often find myself thinking "Well, I am really tired (or I have housework to do) so I'll skip working on it today...I'll get caught up tomorrow." And it doesn't happen. Sometimes it'll take me up to a week to get just one lesson done. Sometimes, I think that if I hadn't invested so much money into it that I'd just quit. But I know that it would be no good. The thing that keeps me going is that I will be able to work from home and still bring in decent money and working my way to help pay on a house. I can't offer any advice on how to get it done b/c I haven't found a way myself but I just want you to know that you are not alone and that it'll be better in the long run when you finally do finish.

Btw, are you doing an online course or are you actually going to a class?

I am a student also with Spartanburg Tech. I also work part-time and have a two year old daughter. I have a wonderful husband that will help if I need him, but only if I'm in crisis mode like right now. Exams are next week. The best thing that I can suggest is to get outside of the house to do your homework/study. I know this can be difficult to do, but is absolutely necessary in order to succeed. This can be a good excuse to take the kids to grandma's house for a few hours or tell your husband to watch them for a little while. Most importantly, don't let guilt get the best of you. I was a stay-at-home mom before going to school. My daughter was 6 mo old and gets sick frequently. I would feel guilty about leaving her but then I realized that I was going to school not only for myself, but for them also. All three of us are going to be better off for this little sacrifice. IT WILL BE HARD!!! DON'T GIVE UP!!!

On the note-taking, I would only write the main points the instructor is saying. The tests usually revolve only around the main points and not the fluff that goes with it. Concentrate on vocabulary words-what do they mean and how do they work? Most important, if you don't know, ASK!! Most of the time if you have a question, everyone else wants to know the same thing. If you are too shy to ask in class, e-mail your instructor or set up an appointment with them. If you have a short question, you can ask after class. But do realize that most instructors need to rush off to another class just like you do. If tutoring is available, take it.
Don't bite off more than you can chew. Some classes are more demanding than others, especially in the medical field.

One big tip. When you sit down to study, keep a piece of paper handy to write down all the things that pop into your head as you start to study. This way, you have it written down so you won't forget it and you are able to concentrate.

If you follow these suggestions, you should do fine. Just remember your house will not be as clean as it was before you started school and you will not have as much time/energy to put into your house and family as you used to. But constantly remind yourself of what you are there for. Keep a picture of your family in a place where you will see it often. I have a picture of my husband and daughter on my cellphone wallpaper. Everytime I open my phone, there they are. In the beginning, I kept a picture of my little girl in the front cover of my notebook. I really needed the inspiration in the beginning.
Now things are a lot better. My family and I have gotten used to me being in school. There are still rough spots, but eventually you and the family get used to it. Just think of it as practice for when you go to work.

I am not sure of your situation, but this is relatively a short process and you can do it. I know it is hard, I am personally getting ready to go back to school in Jan or Feb. and am kinda scared about when I am going to find the time to do things. I suggest seeing if you could possibly get someone to watch your little ones during the day and set aside maybe 1-2 hours and go to the library. this way you will not be interrupted and you will be able to dedicate the whole time to you school work and not have to keep breaking away to tend to your kids. Even if you were able to do this just 2-3 times per week it would still be better than trying to study when you are sleepy or studying w/ constant interruptions. Also pick a time when your husband is home and can tend to the kids and go somewhere to study. If you decide to stay home, go in your room and shut the door, put a sign up that says studying and when the children see that sign they know not to bother you and dad is there is take care of any needs that arise. you just need to get a schedule and be able to stick to it. I am sure you will be successful as long as your will stays strong. And just think when you are done you can look at what you accomplished and know that it was definitely not easy, but you did it and you can be really proud of that, and other things will probably not seem as hard. Good luck.

HI J.,
I just got this email today! I thought I had missed a few days of mamasourse! Guess I needed it LOL. I started taking a medical transcription course online just 4 weeks ago thru AHP. My kids are 10 and 13, so they do well on their own. At the seminar they talked of scheduling YOURSELF for time to work/study. Put it somewhere that you (and others) will see it and stick to it! I should probably follow this a little better myself (with the holiday's approaching I have been putting my classwork aside). I agree with the other woman who suggested having the 2 older ones help in watching the 2 younger ones. Do they have a favorite game they all like to play? If so, they can have "game-time" put on the schedule and play quietly in the other room while you study. Try setting up a chart for them. Set up like a "rewards program". Reward them with a star or sticker when they have their quiet play time together. Set a goal. When they reach "X amount" of starts/stickers, then they get a special treat or family outing or something. If you need to, you can "take away" one for everytime you have to stop your studying to intervene. It doesn't have to be something big, just something they like that you don't do on a regular basis. This will also teach them to be more responsible and helpful. I have felt the same way as you... asking myself if I should continue the course or not. Anything worth doing is worth doing right. I have to keep reminding myself that "when I finish this it will all be worth it and life will be better". I have been out of school for over 20 years, so it is an adjustment for me, too. Good Luck!
Let me know if I can be of any help or support for you.

Hello J.,

I hope I can help. I too returned back to school, but my son was in middle school and I had become a single mom after a 12 year marriage ending. I notice that you have three children that are school aged, Do they go to school or do you homeschool? Anyway, this is all going to work with time management which isn't going to be easy. You have a full plate and it is overwhelming, but if there is a will there is a way. First take a breath, and see when your schedule for the day is going to be like. There are many things you can do to study, you just have to learn to tune things out, for example at the grocery store. Don't take the kids, let hubby watch them, while you go and when you are in line getting ready to pay use flash cards to study medical terminology. This is what is going to get you when typing your reports. I went to school for medical assistant. I also taught medical terminology and medical terminology. Get your kids involve in studying with you. Have them quiz you on the spelling and definitions, especially the older ones. As for taking notes don't rewrite your chapters. My college professor, said you only need to read the chapter once for comprehension, then write a synapses of what you understood the chapter to be, finally reread it and summarize the chapter. Good Luck, and don't give up I promise it will be worthwhile when you complete your goal.

Hello, My sister who only has two kids was having the same problem. She was working full time and her husband was too. When she got home she was always tired and got to spend two hours with the kids before they went to bed. Soon as they were in bed her and hubby was soon to follow. Most of the time since she didnt work on the weekend she would do most of the work then while the husband watch the kids or she would stay up fighting sleep to get the work done. But she said it was worth it. She now has her associates degree. Good luck I hope everything works out for you

Hi J.,
I just wanted to tell you I did the online school with my kids at home too. Mine are a little younger than yours though 7,4,2, and 8 months. It is hard for them to understand and it makes it very hard. What I did was when the oldest one was at school and the others took their naps I worked on homework. Then in the evenings after they went to bed and on weekends when my husband was at home. It takes a lot of adjusting, but it is really worth it. I had a 3.76 GPA and it was hard, but if you schedule your homework around the kids it makes it a little easier. Good luck. V.