Hi! Sorry to hear you are going through such hard times. I want to suggest that you begin video recording his behaviors, all of them, so that when you go to the evaluation you can show his actual behaviors in the home, since most doctors will have difficulty, without visually see him. Normally, kids never show themselves in public, because we teach them to behave... If things are becoming so violent from you, and things are getting worse, you might STRONGLY consider calling your state, county, local emergency mental health intervention service for help. This sounds terrible, however, it might get into the services you need, now instead of later... The symptoms you are describing are quite serious, and need intervention, now! No two children are alike, and it seems your son is in need of IMMEDIATE intervention. Even caregivers can ask for help, if it is causing them, others, property and him to hurt or destroy the environment he resides in. His behaviors are becoming more dangerous, and upsetting to you, and your other children. It is OK to have emergency help, it is not throwing him away, but, getting the help he needs, now! The emergency help, allows for him to be assessed through the pediatric behavioral health portion of mental health. You can contact your local emergency room for how to assess this system; your local police for the number (non-emergency); your local/state mental health intervention 1800 number; your school psychologist for assistance. It is ok, to ask for help, because it seems he is escalating in the frequency, amount, extent, and increasing unpredictability. This is an emergency issue, not something to wait, because he needs therapy, before it remains engrained in him! do not hestitant, and though Dad is patient, you are the one home, the most without support or respite care, and it seems you are screaming out for help. My DD is autistic, so I understand, and we both know early intervention is the key, the ememrgency evaluation will get things moving faster, if you are honest, real and insistent to get him help, even for a 72 psychiatric hold, because without others seeing him in true form, you will be subjected to this behavior, and feeling of being overwhelmed and alone, without taking some serious steps. I also suggest you get some counseling too, because if you do not feed your spirit, soul, mind, you are no help to anyone... I go to counseling, because I need a safe place to vent, see my famial issues without ridicule or hurt feelings; allows you to strenghten yourself... It seems you are trying to be a "supermom," without support, and even superman needs the police! There is nothing wrong with asking for help, if I had not, I do not think, I would have survived; there are behavioral trainings that the specialists know that I could not do, because I was too close to the situation... They even teach me how to handle the behaviors, even Moms, need to learn new ways... Sometimes the guilt tends to slip in when you are battling the numerous fires that come, and do not have time to reassess the methods to gain the sanity in your home you and hubby craze. Even parent/marital counseling helps strengthen your union... There comes a time, when you, both have realized these behaviors are far more then the other boys, and it seems both of you need to sit, and be honest about what needs to occur for him, including emergency intervention... It is better to gain help now, before the police come, because he did something quite harmful and dangerous for all of you! Some people do not realize that though there are terrible stories about child protection services, people do not realize that they also, assist in obtaining services, you cannot assess for insurance reasons or system delay... I called child protective services, because the schools would not help, the doctors were not seeing she was autistic, and the medical system delays were putting her further behind and more violent. They gave me the assess I needed, because they saw she was in a good home, that supported her, but, the system was stopping her getting help. Today, she is striving, learned how to control her behaviors, attends college, and we can live with one another... Do what you need to do to gain some peace in your home... You already know, that maternal intuition is no a farce, follow your heart and mind, do not let others stop you, do what you know is right in your heart... Good luck!