I am SO BLOODY OVER these "greed" accusations, I seriously could just spit. My ears are buzzing. Seriously, I've been ignoring and ignoring and ignoring this tripe, but enough is enough.
I do Black Friday (obviously). Evidently, there are moms who do not do Black Friday. Should I sit here at my desk and say they are LAZY? NO, that would be presumptuous, silly, and inaccurate in 90% of the cases, right? That's how I feel about someone sitting there saying Black Friday shoppers are greedy and aggressive. It's really aggravating me. So since there are so many moms who can't figure it out, whether they do it because they're lazy or not, here's the deal. I can't speak for the nation, but I can speak for myself, my mom, and several friends that do it.
We have a budget. Every year, I budget a specific amount. That amount covers, in this order: my children, my husband, my mom, some of my friends' children, some of my friends, and then "miscellanious" people (my son's "friends" in kung fu, awanas, sunday school, and soccer, his riding instructor, his babysitter, my dad who I am not close to, and his daughter who I'm not close to, neighbors and their children, and a family or two that I'll inevitably say "Hey---I bet they could use that" or "Hey---they've had a really bad year, I'm going to bless them"). There's also the charities that we give to: my husband's work does the Coats for Kids thing, and we ALWAYS buy 2 new coats as well as donating the coat my youngest has outgrown from the previous year, there's Toys for Tots which my good friend's husband is heavily involved in so we always do that with the kids, there's the Volunteers in Medicine that we matched our whole holiday budget for them last Thursday. We volunteer our time, work, and goods for the local food pantry. We pick a missionary every year and sponsor them and their kids (be it my friend who runs a family style children's home (15 kids) and their preschool in Tanzania, or the shelter that rescues girls from the sex trade and provides them safety, shelter, and food, educates them and trains them in a vocation in Thailand, or my friend that is currently working to assist the refugees that stuck in no man's land between Myanmar (Burma) and Thailand, or the orphanage I used to work at in Albania....it may be toys, but it may be books or clothes or whatever I'm told to send, plus silly comfort items for my friends like real toilet paper where the hot pink dye doesn't run when wet, or a big jar of peanut butter or whatever). There's also the child we support through Compassion International and we double one payment for a gift for him and they use the extra to give gifts to his siblings. But I have a BUDGET. And things are getting more and more expensive. And I haven't found a full time job. So if I can stand in line for a few hours and save 20, 30, 50, even 75% off of some things to knock off items on my shopping list, then you're darn right I will. Because when the money is gone, the money is gone.
I can stay in my house and watch TV (since dinner is finished and cleaned up by 6:30pm, and my boys go to bed no later than 8:30pm, and my husband goes to bed at 10pm) yeah, we can sit home and watch TV and wind down in the name of "family time". Or I can get ridiculously early while everyone is asleep (noone is eating turkey, noone is wanting to play Scrabble or talk or build a memory at 2am in my house), and I can sit outside in the cold, bundled up and waiting to S T R E T C H out the set amount of money that I am going to spend, whether it be on 5 items, or stretched out to 17 items. The "marketers" and the "big businesses" that you people like to mention: they are going to make a specific amount from me in a given year, whether I buy a couple things here and there during the year, or save up for a sale and get things when they are cheap. It's still the same amount. People have a certain amount of money. Now if the marketers want to compete with EACH OTHER to get my business, well more power to them! Compete away! Hack and slash those prices. I'm all for it. But they aren't fooling us. We know what the price of an average 2 screen DVD player for the car costs on a regular day (129.99-149.99; I've priced it several times throughout the year) and if I can find that same one at 79.99, well, I'll be more than happy to buy it and use my saved money to get something else on the list as well. And if that thing is on sale that helps me get another thing, too.
Also, we've been needing sheets FOREVER. Not something worth camping out for, but it's also not likely to be something that I need to get up in the middle of the night for----it'll be there if I just plan my route right. We've got one set of nice sheets for the guest bed, the boys each have 2 sets of sheets, but the master bed: those sheets are wonderful, BUT they are almost 17 years old. They've worn so thin, that now there's a hole (I keep it on my side, at the foot of the bed, because I'm short). I can pay $120 for those same sheets, or replace them for something cheaper at $99......or I can WAIT and sacrifice a little bit (even though there's a HOLE in my SHEETS) and on Black Friday, I can get a decent 700ct set for $49. I'll get a couple sets, thanks. My son is about big enough to move from the bottom bunk to the top bunk, and we DO have cousins coming at the beginning of the year to stay with us, so we're taking advantage of a sale to get $45 off a twin mattress and there's pillows on sale on Black Friday, also. Let's go ahead and finish up his room since we've been here for nearly 6 months, and get that bunk bed completely done. (Right now the top bunk is stuffed animals and random stuff he doesn't want his little brother playing with. We'll take advantage of these sales and make it 2 beds now, and just pay $30 at Lowes to get a shelf up on his wall for those trophies and "big boy" toys that he doesn't want his little brother breaking).
Now there's also excitement. There's also tradition. My friend Chris (shopping king, lol) and I are looking forward to meeting another friend and shopping this year. We'll have our thermoses filled with hot chocolate, we'll have cinnamon rolls, and little snuggy blankets. We'll play Uno, we'll talk with no interruptions from children, we'll be excited about our "plans" and imagining the fun and excitement when people open the gifts we're getting. About 30 minutes before time to open the doors, one of us will take the blankets, thermoses, cards, etc to the car. By then, everyone surrounding us has met us or at least seen us, so noone is freaking out about "cutting in line". Because we're social. People will meet us. It's almost like "hunting" except.....not killing, lol. We're still providing for our family. And the truth is, I'm a bit of a nerd. I DID do the math my previous years: I got to the store at 3:45am, it opened at 6am. I saved more than $200. On my little part time job, I do not make that much money in 2 hours and 15 minutes!!! I got an Xbox 360 ($75 off) with the game of the moment (Black Ops)for 50% off, and got another game that gave me an additional $10 gift card. Then I got my mom the DVD player (since she doesn't have cable and her player had died) for 40% off. The $13 board games were on a $5 special. And those things combined with the inflatable ball they climb in and roll around the yard in gave me an extra $10 gift card. So, yeah...not only did I get the sale prices, but also gift cards for the diapers I buy there. I was home by brekafast time, hung out with the family, had a nap when they did and caught up on my sleep that way. To me, it was worth it. If I made $100 an hour, it'd be questionable as to whether it was worth it. But financially, it was more than worth it. Now that I've got friends to shop with me again (last year I didn't), it'll be socially worth it as well. It's fun.
And you need to have a little common sense: we're not techies so we don't go after the stuff that would attract the crazies. We don't go to Walmart or places that don't have organization. If it's organized, it's not only safe but also enjoyable. Nice to talk with strangers and just hang out. Sometimes you get lucky and stand by someone that's just hilarious. My first time, about 7 or 8 years ago, Jen and I were behind these other ladies that I really loved. They were all dressed up and had their bells on, they were keeping everyone laughing. There were free gifts at the door for the first 50 people, and everyone just walked quickly in a line and said "Thank you! Merry Christmas!" as they got their gifts. Seemed like everyone knew where they were going as they all split off from there. I was hooked then. Last year I was at Target. I am overweight and had a hurt knee (would I get trampled since I can't run?), so I was a little concerned on how the crowd would behave at a "discount store", but although people moved quickly, noone was shoved, pushed, cussed, etc. (And I WAS getting one of the most wanted items in the store....but it was fine, because it was organized). I'd stay far away from Walmart. What they do there is on purpose, and naughty. Just asking for trouble. But that's their fault, not necessarily the shoppers. We also don't put all our eggs in one basket. We have fun. We hope to get what's on the list (we've had great success and get what we want, but then, we're up EARLY.) but if we don't get it, all is not lost. There's still other stuff on the list.
My husband is actually PROUD of me for being able to do as much as we do with a set amount of money. He says that's like me working a full time job after taxes, childcare, clothes, and time---that I'd have to work full time to bring in what I bring in without working (except pt, from home). But no, we're far from greedy and I seriously take exception to that. And we have fun. And we do enjoy the thrill of the hunt. If you can't understand that, fine. But try to stop the judging from afar.