I Am an Adult Daughter of Narcissistic Mother!

WOW! We should all unite here and form a support group lol!! I actually have a 3 paged letter in my purse that I am waiting to give to my mom. My whole life she has made one HORRIBLE mistake after another, but it's never her fault. She was an awful mom to me, continues to be as an adult, tries to control my life, and bring me down. I hate to say that it's nice to know that I'm not alone, but it is!!! I have often struggled with the "maybe it's me" thoughts, because it's sooooo exhausting!! And she will never admit ANY fault, and she's very good at manipulating everyone around her! Thanks for posting this, I can't wait to check out the site!! I have often said that she's really is mentally ill. But that doesnt make it any easier!

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Oh most definitely! I only figured out she was a narcissist a few years ago, I just never knew how to deal with her. It doesn't stop me from wanting her to be my mom, you know? My way of dealing is to just avoid contact with her as much as possible, pretty much holidays and birthdays, that's it. You are not alone. It's really hard. 40 years later it still hurts sometimes, especially when I am around my MIL, who is and was a fantastic mother.

Thanks for the website link!

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i only had to read through 5 examples to know for sure that my mother is narcissistic!
my sister is like that too.
i always joked about them being like that but now i know its a real problem. im going to send this to my siblings too, so they can tell me if they think its accurate.
im actually in the process of writing a book about how a young girls life is affected by her mothers narcissism. we should keep in contact and i can send it to you when im done!

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Thank you for sharing! I had no idea there was a dedicated site for this issue between mothers and daughters. My mom is the same way and it bothers me so bad. Maybe I can get some tips to live with it.

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I actually recently went to a therapist regarding my mother and her negative, selfish, "victim" and dramatic behaviour. I told the therapist all of the reasons that my mother drives me insane and why I can't seem to find the time to deal with someone like her in my life. The therapists exacts words to me were "well, sounds to me like your mother is a narcissist." I'd never heard of it before and I had to have her explain to me what that meant. Once she explained what narcissistic behaviour was, I realized that that was my mother completely. I too felt as if a huge burden had been lifted from my shoulders with that understanding. I realized that it wasn't my fault that my mother was this way and that there is nothing I can do to change her. I was able to come to acceptence with who my mother is, and not have such high expectations of her as well.
Thanks for sharing the website you came across. I'm going to look it up now. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who is dealing with this in life.
Sincerely,
T.

1 mom found this helpful