58 answers

Husband Won't Use Car Seat

For NOT the first time (and after the fact) and found out my husband isn't putting our 2 year old daughter in her car seat in his car. The car seat is in the back seat, but he puts her in the front seat with the adult seat belt (turns the air bag off).

I'm sick about this...he's just being lazy and selfish and I don't know what to do about it. I called the sheriff's dept and they said that if I know he's out with her, I can call them but it sounds like all they'll do is write a ticket. Also, I don't always know when he's out driving with her.

Has anyone else had to deal with this? Any advice?

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

Maybe if you let him know he will be charged with manslaughter should he get in an accident and she dies. My husband is a police officer and this is a big pet peave of his.

4 moms found this helpful

If he cant put her in the carseat, I would pack my bags and my daughters and that would be the end of that.

4 moms found this helpful

That is SO wrong on SO many levels. I don't even know what to say. WHY is he doing that? How would he feel is she is pushed through the windshield in a crash?

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

I'm an insurance agent and have heard stories that you really wouldn't want to hear. I would pack up and leave him. Seriously, this is a deal breaker. You do not mess around with putting my child in danger. Simple as that. Good luck.

8 moms found this helpful

if my spouse was that reckless with my child's life, i'd be filing divorce papers and contacting CPS to limit his access to her to only supervised visitation. that may seem harsh, but her blood is on your hands as well if something happens to her - you know about it and have to do something!

5 moms found this helpful

I'm not going to judge you. My husband is a wonderful man, but some of the things he has done out of laziness or selfishness, confound me. But, this is your child and all anyone will do if something happens to her is judge YOU and question your love for your child. I love my husband, but my daughter is my life. I'm sure that you are aware that this may not be the only way he is endangering your daughter.

Here is what I would do in this order:

-take the keys away from him when I left the house without my child and limit the amount of time he is alone with the child. Because, let's face it, if he is brave enough to do this, there may be other things he is being lazy about. He does not deserve to go out of the house when he spends time with her unless he can put her in her carseat.
-show him a few videos of real accidents involving children not strapped in. I'm not brave enough to search for them, but if you can't find them on YouTube, someone at the police force can give you some.
-share this information with someone he respects and listens to. Maybe they can correct behavior that you can't.

I would never even resort to calling the cops, because he would never be allowed to drive my daughter anywhere without me being there to monitor that she is in a carseat.

If you are scared of his reaction to any of the above, maybe you need to reconsider his role in your family. That's a hard step, but your daughter comes first.

4 moms found this helpful

That is SO wrong on SO many levels. I don't even know what to say. WHY is he doing that? How would he feel is she is pushed through the windshield in a crash?

4 moms found this helpful

If he cant put her in the carseat, I would pack my bags and my daughters and that would be the end of that.

4 moms found this helpful

Maybe if you let him know he will be charged with manslaughter should he get in an accident and she dies. My husband is a police officer and this is a big pet peave of his.

4 moms found this helpful

I would look up some videos on Youtube about what could happen, and have him watch them. Then tell him to imagine that it's HIS beloved 2 year old flying through the window... or being severely injured by the strap of the seatbelt. Maybe that will change his tune.

2 moms found this helpful

Please forgive if this was suggested earlier; I haven't had a chance to read every post. Call you local police right now, and see if you can get an officer to come to your house ASAP nand talk to him firmly and warn him that he is breaking the law and putting his child in grave danger every time he drives the car. At the same time I'd just inform him he is never driving your child anywhere, ever, period. Which raises a question -- why don't you always know when he's out driving with her?

In fact, your husband could possibly be prosecuted not only for breaking the safety seat law but also for the much more serious crime of child endangerment. Hello, criminal record. Does he want to risk that, as well as his child's life?

If I knew a neighbor was consistently doing what he is doing --- and he is doing it REPEATEDLY! -- I would call both the police AND the Child Protective Services office, which would bring down a host of long-term troubles on him and unfortunately on you too. CPS means home inspections and visits, possible legal action, CPS questioning whether all the children in your home are safe and well cared for in other ways, monitoring over long periods of time by CPS officers, possible impact on his job, etc.

If he is so pig-headed and lazy he won't protect his precious child's life, maybe self-preservation will make him at least cover his backside with the law and CPS.

2 moms found this helpful

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