"How do I learn to be happy with just the 5 kids?" You get up in the morning, thank God or the universe or whatever fits with your belief system for all your blessings and you LOOK into the faces of each of your beautiful children and say to yourself " You ARE enough for me! I have everything I need right here!" Seriously. Do it. You will not be satisfied with what you have until you make a conscious effort every day to focus on and be grateful---actively grateful (not just in words)--- for all that you DO have instead of what you don't.
You stop and take a step back and put yourself in your husband's shoes. Getting up, doing a long commute, working all day, coming home and doing kid duty and dish duty and then dealing with sick wife who does not seem satisfied with her life. Does that sound like a scenario that needs any more stress?
On top of that, imagine the constant pressure of knowing he's the sole supporter for soon to be 7 people. That in itself is emotionally exhausting.
Can you *really* feel what that must be like for him? S E V E N people....all on him. Doesn't matter how much money he makes or how secure his job is, that's a lot of pressure.
Ever hear of the saying "the straw that broke the camel's back?" To me, that seems to be where your husband is right now. He's doing all he can to take care of his family and provide a good life for all of you. He's helping with the kids and house when he gets home. And he's getting continued pressure to add just one more. What do you think that feels like to him? Most anyone would feel "grumpy," exhausted, and worn-out under those circumstances. He's at his breaking point, and as his partner in life, you have to help that situation, not add to it.
Sometimes, it's hard to see things from another perspective, and that's where other people can be really helpful. Try not to view these responses as harsh but rather as people who took time out of their day to help you see something you haven't been able to see on your own.
Another thought I had was for the baby you're expecting. Actually, it's a feeling.....a feeling of sadness. Usually, when a woman is about to give birth, she is focused on the baby, imagining what the baby will be, thinking of names, what it will feel like to meet the new baby, etc. What are you thinking of? The NEXT child. You haven't even given birth yet, and you are allowing your attention to be dominated by thoughts of some other child in the future. You're grieving for the dream of that child instead of focusing on the child within you and the four little ones already surrounding you.
It is hard to give up a dream. But really, you HAVE your dream.
What would #6 give you that you don't already have?
Truly wishing you all the best to come to peace with this.
I really hope you will try to put aside your hurt feelings, step back, and take another look at the responses you've received. Or put them aside for the moment and come back to re-read when you might be more receptive. There are really some words of wisdom here that can only help your marriage and your life, if you will let them.