How to Replace One Feeding with Formula a Day.

Ten Ways Fathers Can Bond with the Breastfed Baby

by Angela White, J.D., breastfeeding counselor on July 1st, 2007

father-and-son.jpgFor whatever reason (read: excessive f*rmula marketing practices), people associate bottle-feeding with bonding. Many people think that giving a baby a bottle is somehow a necessary and important part of a father’s (or grandmother’s or grandfather’s) bonding with a baby.

Certainly a father might enjoy giving a bottle (and there is plenty of time for that once breastfeeding is well established), but it’s not the only way a father can bond with his baby. A father can:

1. Be in charge of the nightly bath.

2. Sing songs.

3. Wear the baby in a sling or other baby carrier.

4. Change diapers! It may not sound like a glamorous activity, but diaper changing time is an opportunity for conversation and interaction.

5. Rock the baby in the rocking chair or glider.

6. Go for a walk using a stroller or baby carrier.

7. Bring the baby to mom for feedings. That simple act builds trust by essentially saying to the baby, “I recognize what you need and I will help satisfy your need.”

8. Burp the baby after feedings. If the father gets lucky he might even pat the little one to sleep on his shoulder!

9. Be a pacifier. Babies have a strong need to suck, and while that need should generally be satisfied at the breast, in a pinch a father can offer a clean finger as an alternative. He should turn his finger so the pad, not the fingernail, faces the roof of the baby’s mouth. (This trick works for moms too of course! When a baby is having trouble nursing to sleep and staying asleep after popping off the breast, a mother can either re-latch or try offering a clean finger instead).

10. Learn the art of baby massage.

1 mom found this helpful

Emily,

Pump.

:-)T.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi Emily,
Yes, we all know breast milk is the best but that isn't always possible for everyone and we do the best that we can for our children. One way to avoid clogged ducts and wean is to start by pumping but decrease the pumping time a little at a time everyday so that it isn't such a shock for your breasts. You mentioned that you were mixing breast milk with formula. You can pump and mix it with formula for her feed and progressively shorten the pumping time and increase the amount of formula. It can be a bit time consuming at the beginnning but its a more gentle way to wean for you and your baby. Hope that helps

Pump and freeze, mamma. Pump and freeze. My daughter-in-law has done it for both of her children (now 2 1/2 and 8 months). Works great. No clogging, and no upset tummies from the change in milk. Try it, bet you like it! Signed, "Gramma NeeNee"

If you skip a feeding and you still want your milk supply to stay up you will have to pump- so you really won't be freeing up time for you.

I would not suggest formula now unless you are already wanting to wean your child. Pump your milk and let your husband feed her if he really wants to be involved in the feeding. If not let him have another job like walking around with the baby in a front back. My husband would burp the babies after a feeding and let the baby sleep on his chest for a short nap. I also, agree that most men are not very into the infant stage but will bond as they get older.Good luck but be prepared that your baby may prefer the bottle & formula and not nurse well after. Good luck

I'm in agreement with the rest of the moms... you probably won't be avoiding the clogged ducts by skipping a feeding. Why give your baby second rate food, anyway? She's really young at 11 weeks, needs your milk and if you start formula, it'll just turn into your supply going down to the point that you feel you can't keep up with her demand, then eventually you may find yourself with a baby who is preferring the bottle over you. Keep her on the boob as long as possible! You only get a short amount of time with breastfeeding, and that's what your body is there to do!

I've heard of lots of dads wanting to have time to feed the baby and moms decide on formula for the daddy feeding. Then the daddy finds other things to do once the novelty wears off and mommy is stuck with the formula feeding. Daddy will be able to help with feedings once baby starts eating solids, which really isn't long at all!

Besides, once formula is introduced, baby's bowel movements will never be the same again. They'll stink! Try to wait as long as possible to introduce anything but your milk!

Have you considered pumping out breast milk for feedings? You wouldn't have to worry about clogged ducts that way. Just pump after each feeding to build up a supply. After you have a bottle, you would only need to pump once a day. If that is too much of a hassle, then try giving your daughter a bottle of formula and pump out only a little bit of breast milk so that you don't get clogged. Eventually you won't need to pump and the feeding can be completely skipped. Good luck!

Don't give her formula. That is how to avoid the clogged duct. Pump during the normal time she would eat, then have dad give it to her in a bottle, if that is what you want. If you miss a feeding, you will be telling your body that you don't need as much milk, and your production will go down. Also, formula is not that great for your baby, if you can avoid it. I wonder, if you have spoken to your husband about how he wants to bond with his daughter. Feeding the baby, may not be what he wants to do. Ask him what he wants to do with her, be it go for a walk, take a nap together, or something. Many men are just not baby people either. My hubby didn't like the baby stage much, but now that the boys are older (2 and 4) they get along, and they play.
Your main question, though was how to skip a feeding and avoid clogged ducts- you probably can't, until your production goes down, and then you may start to not produce enough until your baby is on more again.

you could try squeezing a little milk out to keep it flowing at the time of your regular feeding.

Hi Emily,

Congratulations on the birth of your new baby! I have a new daughter who is 9 weeks old and a four year old daughter as well. I know it seems like the work never ends and right now a formula feeding sounds pretty good to you. If you feel that you need to be away from your newborn beyond the time in between feedings then have you considered pumping? I did it for my first daughter because she was a preemie and it really wasn't that hard. You could use a small, store bought pump. Also, most infants take a pretty good afternoon nap. Could you feed her just before she goes down then use the time she's sleeping? Also, just a thought, but could your husband, a friend or a paid helper give you a hand with errands or what needs doing around the house? You are doing the most important work in the world - growing a human being - and no one (and no formula) can replace you!!

I hope you'll reevaluate the situation and perhaps realize that there are options other than turning to formula.

I wish you and your little girl all the best!!

S.

Hi,

Try starting with a half a bottle and finishing with the breast, then slowing do more bottle and less breast over the course of two weeks. It worked for me and I had major problems with clogged ducts. Good luck- it definitely is liberating even if only once a day!

pump so you don't have to give chemically made formula. Your milk is made for YOUR child.

Clogged ducts may not be because of the missed feeding, sometimes just luck, but use warm wash clothes or a heating pad to help, anti inflamitory too.

Great job breast feeding, KEEP IT UP!

I suggest you pump. That way, your milk supply will stay the same. Unless you are intending you stop breast feeding soon--you shoud pump and give the expressed milk to your husband to feed the baby. If you cannot afford a pump--you can usually rent one from the hospital--or use a hand pump. Even though the hand pump is not as easy as the electric pump--it works just the same. Good luck!

Hi Emily,

pump during that feeding; you'll want to generate a supply of frozen milk for an emergency or for a break. Or even just to let your spouse feed her with your milk rather than with formula. Keep up the feeding but pump instead.

And BTW, don't worry about "nipple confusion" at this time; you've already established breastfeeding and she'll be fine. We waited until DS1 was 3.5 months before we introduced a bottle. He hated it! He wouldn't take it! DS2 we gave the bottle sooner; much easier.

Good luck!

From what I understand the best way to unclog would be to have your baby keep nursing, or pump the milk. If your husband wants to feed her you can pump and have your husband give her that in a bottle - it is so much better for her than formula.