How to Overcome Depression

Updated on March 31, 2011
K.F. asks from Sunbury, OH
21 answers

I'm starting to think I have depression, but can't figure out why when I am so blessed. I get to be a SAHM, live in a nice house, have enough money to pay the bills and still do things and buy the extra things, I have a great husband, great kids, I could go on and on about all of the good things in my life. I am never happy though, I will look forward to things like going out somewhere with the kids or my husband and once the time comes I want to just stay home. If I do go, I can't wait until it's over. I don't really enjoy doing anything! playing with the kids, going out with my husband, hanging out or talking with a friend...nothing is fun anymore. I think I've been this way for a long time now but I try not to think about it. Lately I have been eating like crazy and it's not that I'm hungry at all, its just about the only thing that puts me in a good mood, but that doesn't last long since I am still trying to lose my last few pounds of baby weight so it makes me feel even worse. I don't know if it's weather realted...even though it's spring it's still winter like weather here so I am spending a lot of time in the house. I havent really said anything to my husband about this, he has enough stress with work I don't want to worry him and I feel stupid talking to anyone else about this. Like I said, I have NO reason to feel this way. My mom had depression in the past but I don't know details, just that she was on medication for it. So I was looking for advice....are there any specific vitamins/supplements I should be taking that could help my moods? I have constant mood swings too and sometimes I can't even stand to be around myself. Could this be post partum depression? I have a almost 3 year old and a 6 month old. I would like to avoid taking medication if I can, but I guess eventually if nothing works I will have to see a doctor about this.I appreciate any advice.

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M.S.

answers from Louisville on

I had the same problem soon after my baby girl was born. Honestly, medication really helped. I tried ignoring it, but the signs and symptoms were just too strong. Medication was the key for me. But i am not taking a strong amount of it, just 10 mg of Prozac. It reallly helps.

1 mom found this helpful

T.N.

answers from Albany on

Hi KF, you have so many good answers here. I just wanted to add, when I take my daily Multivitamin regularly, I DO feel a little less fragile.

:)

1 mom found this helpful

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N.W.

answers from Eugene on

If you feel depressed for no reason, it may be a chemical or hormonal imbalance. See your doctor. It could be an easy fix. Have him do a thorough thyroid check.

Since your mom was on meds for depression, you may want to ask her for more details, or at least let your doctor know that there is that risk factor in your genetic history.

4 moms found this helpful
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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Two suggestions:

1. If you are a praying woman, please seek God provision, peace and comfort and ask people at your church (if you are attending or not), to pray for your well being and that of your family.

2. Follow the advice of Nancy W. (I believe she is also right on track)

In my forties, I experienced depression so bad that I could barely get out of bed to go the the bathroom or eat. I liked my doctor but she had me on so many things: to sleep, to wake up, to not depressed.

One day I realized that I didn't feel better and in fact I felt worse, so I flushed the pills and started little by little, getting out in the fresh air, eating even when I didn't feel like it and just moving around. That's been a long time ago, but I can tell you daily prayer (first thing and last thing helps so much). If you are not a praying woman, meditation would be similar. Simple but true, you must love and take care of yourself before you can take good care of others.

Blessings...

3 moms found this helpful
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M.U.

answers from Tampa on

You have described some of the classic symptoms of depression. Sounds like there is also family history. It is not something to be ashamed of or feel bad about, although there is still stigma in our society. You have a 6 m old baby, so post-partum can be an issue, although you describe feeling this way a long time. It may be you've been depressed for some time and recent pregnancy/baby compounds it. If you are opposed to taking medicine, you can try talk-therapy, but you need to find a therapist you click with, which sometimes takes trial and error. Depression does not have to have a reason, and often it does not. Rather it is often a biochemical issue. One thing is clear from what you wrote, you do not need to continue feeling this way, please get some help! Life is too short to go through it feeling lousy when you don't have.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.F.

answers from New York on

I read all the responses so far. My bout with depression was turned around by diet (eating regularly, balanced, healthy meals) and exercise (30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the evening).

I did spend some time in counseling and it took me a while to find the right kind of counselor but in combination with the exercise and the proper eating I finally got to normal again or should I say better than normal because I had been depressed for years.

My exercise routine began short and simple. Running in place, jumping jacks, touching my toes, knee bends, leg lifts, crunches, and some weight lifting. Not all in one day but a series of them at a time until I built up to 30 minutes a day. Day 1. I could feel a difference. I'm not a fitness nut but I definitely experienced a difference in how I felt.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from New York on

It can absolutely be post partum. I had it and the best thing for me was talking. I found a female therapist who specialized in female issues and even ran a group for new mothers. She was the best. And when I was feeling better, she told me that we were done.

I did take meds, too. I was very anxious and needed them to help me with anxiety.

Just remember, meds aren't forever. But they can really help you get over the hump. You shouldn't feel bad if you go that route. And you don't have to tell anyone your business.

Fell better!

2 moms found this helpful
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P.O.

answers from Harrisburg on

Could you just be stuck in a routine and normal everyday stuff and are simply bored. Try doing something out of the ordinary and spark up your interest. Inspirational music, prayer, good diet, exercise and sometimes meds are helpful in relieving depression if that's what you think is going on!

2 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from Phoenix on

Getting out of the house and exercising! Serious movement to get the chemicals in your body moving around. That is some of the best ways to deal with it on a daily basis, at least for me.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

I seriously went through the same exact thing a few years ago after my second child was born. I finally got so depressed, I wasn't blue anymore, I was dark blue, black. I felt like I was going in a vicious circle. Never living up to anyone's expectations, trying to be happy, faking the smiles, and never enjoying the precious moments. I felt like I was in my own hell and no one could ever understand because I didn't know how to exactly explain it.
So, with all that and more, I really, really, would follow others advice and start off with your family doctor or OB-GYN. That is what I did because I knew I was only going to get worse. Don't be embarrassed, don't feel like you are going to expose any kind of weakness, there are so many changes in your life, new baby, sleep, hormones, etc. Find a good therapist or psychiatrist. Look at it this way, it's at least an hour of a break where you can talk about you and someone is paying attention:). I promise, there is light at the end of the tunnel and where you will feel like you again. Just take "your" health seriously and don't wait.

2 moms found this helpful
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A.B.

answers from Louisville on

It's worth talking to a doctor, but it's also worthwhile to make an effort to make small changes a little at a time and see if you can help yourself. There is a time and place for medication, but I think as a society, we are very quick to medicate and reluctant to just work at something until we improve. A good diet, exercise, and more sleep can make a huge difference for someone who is struggling with mild to moderate depression. When we don't take care of our physical needs, it tends to influence other things like our mental and emotional health. They are all tied together. When you eat regular healthy meals so your blood sugar isn't going up and down (often a cause of mood swings), when you get enough sleep (which fends off that "down" feeling, makes you more energetic, and prevents a lot of the irritability we moms get) and when you exercise daily (proven to improve mood and increase energy) you may find you are no longer struggling. If, however, you are doing all these things, perhaps it's time to see about medication and/or counseling. But realize that they are going to likely point you towards a behavior change and also that medications only "take the edge off". They don't change your physical circumstances.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Magnisium really helps me and St Johns Wart too.....

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I don't think it would be a bad idea to talk to your doctor about PPD. However, other things can lead to depression, too. Have you had any changes in medications lately? For instance, did you start using birth control again after your pregnancy was over? Talk to your doctor about that as well.

As far as vitamins that can help mood, I have heard that a B-complex vitamin helps, as well as Vitamin D.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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S.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

I feel like this a lot too... and my Dr. told me that she thinks I have a low grade depression... one that just sits there but doesn't 'swing' me to far either way. She suggested I try St. John Wort (sp?) b/c a lot of anti-depressant meds can cause weight gain and said to couple it w/ exercise. I've just started it so no feedback yet.

We also bought one of those SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) lights (LG sells one). We used it last winter - it worked really well. We didn't use it this winter yet, but I might use it this month b/c we're also into yet another month of freezing temps. They run about $190 but are worth it.

You don't mention if you've always been like this of if it's just recently. Given that you are only 6mos post birth - I would talk to your Dr. re: ppd b/c if this is a more recent mood/feeling/behavior then that's far more likely what you have. Best of luck to you.

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T.P.

answers from New York on

Your vitamin D levels are probably very low. I would start cutting carbs out of my diet, i.e. pasta, rice, bread and sugar, and incorporated vitamin D3 and fish oil into my diet. You can also take cod liver oil, which will give you essential fatty acids and vitamin D3. Carlsons or Nordic Naturals are great brands. I would also look to supplement with a Green Super Food like Garden of Life. Lastly, Tulsi Tea is one of the BEST teas to calm you and is anti inflammatory. Try to exercise. Start by walking daily. Eventually, you will start to feel bette. The winter weather just might be the trigger, but if you do these things, it will get better.

T. P

1 mom found this helpful
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M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

First, don't try to self-medicate with over-the-counter products. They're unregulated and you don't know what you're putting in your body.

I really urge you to get in with a psychiatrist who can do a full evaluation and determine whether it is depression or even something else. It's not normal to feel no joy in life, so it's time to seek the medical help. You may need medication, you may need a therapist, or a combination of the two. In any case, a doctor is in the best position to diagnose and develop a treatment plan.

Our eight-year-old son has depression (a co-morbid condition with his ADHD and OCD) and I can tell you medication made a huge difference in his happiness. He's no longer the "glass-half-empty" boy.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.N.

answers from Cleveland on

If you aren't, start taking your prenatal again, or an over the counter version. The extra vitamins are great for women in general during their reproductive years. Other than that, it's been said, diet and exercise. I have chronic depression, it's a chemical imbalance and I can either live with it and control it the best I can or take meds for the rest of my life. I hate to take medication so I have learned to deal.

try yoga, meditation or prayer
Break your routine, i have to force myself to go to my MOPS group once a month, and actually i think I hate it, but i feel so much better when I come back home.
get as much sunshine as possible, whenever possible.
kick the caffeine
always, nomatter how bad you feel and how little you want to do, shower and get dressed for the day
keep a journal, or two, one to complain and vent and one where you can list all the things you are grateful for. reread the latter and burn the first when it is full.
talking helps, talk here, or to a friend, therapist, pastor, doctor, your husband, anyone who will listen and not judge

and remember, depression is normal and it can be genetic, it's not your fault and it doesn't make you crazy or a bad person/wife/mother

1 mom found this helpful
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A.L.

answers from Cleveland on

Attached is a short article I recommend you read. I'd love be talk to you if you like. Also I encourage you to browse our website and watch the different videos throughout; they are really helpful in understanding how important good nutrition is.

Sincerely,
A.

http://content.reliv.com/old/userfiles/file/wellness/US/E...

www.HopeShared.com

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S.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

I think sometimes we all feel like that, at least, I do. It may just be a diet change that you need. I would google foods that boost your mood. I know that I have read articles on the interent about it. Since you have a baby that is just 6 months old your hormones could still be out of wack too a little bit. Maybe do a little exercise everyday, like yoga. Even if it is just for 15 minutes a day. That helps too. Like someone else said on here, I would try helping myself first before talking to a doctor about medication. Good Luck :)

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Two suggestions:

1. If you are a praying woman, please seek God provision, peace and comfort and ask people at your church (if you are attending or not), to pray for your well being and that of your family.

2. Follow the advice of Nancy W. (I believe she is also right on track)

In my forties, I experienced depression so bad that I could barely get out of bed to go the the bathroom or eat. I liked my doctor but she had me on so many things: to sleep, to wake up, to not depressed.

One day I realized that I didn't feel better and in fact I felt worse, so I flushed the pills and started little by little, getting out in the fresh air, eating even when I didn't feel like it and just moving around. That's been a long time ago, but I can tell you daily prayer (first thing and last thing helps so much). If you are not a praying woman, meditation would be similar. Simple but true, you must love and take care of yourself before you can take good care of others.

Blessings...

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J.B.

answers from Evansville on

I know how you feel! I recently broke down crying and told my husband basically everything you've described...he helped me decide to go to our family doctor and talk to him about it. Like you I really have no obvious reason to be depressed -we're really fortunate during such a bad time for so many people- but there it is, I was unhappy and angry. I was snapping at everyone... Same thoughts about this incredibly dark winter (has it been darker and longer than normal??), maybe hormones....My mom also suffered from depression at about my age, although hers was more along the unable to get out of bed, crying all the time variety. Anyway, after much talking with the family dr, he got me to try prozac. Apparently you can stop taking it after 6 months or so and see if you feel ok without it. That was a big concern for me. I couldn't go on like I was, but also didn't want to take something forever! After 3 weeks on the lowest dose, I couldn't believe how good I felt. I had days where my cheeks hurt from smiling (I didn't know I hadn't been smiling!). I just felt like something heavy had been lifted off me. It has been really weird, for lack of a better description to sit down, look around and realize, I feel good :) I'm hoping to be off of it in the fall/winter around the 6 month mark. We'll see.
If you can find a solution without medication, I hope it works for you! I do understand not wanting to take anything. I just wanted to tell you how I felt after finally going to the doctor and getting medication.
Good luck, chin up! If nothing else- the spring flowers are starting to pop up and bloom here!

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