How to Lose Weight While Helping Her Gain?

Updated on January 27, 2012
S.E. asks from Landenberg, PA
14 answers

Ok Moms heres is the problem. I have an underweight tween. We've seen the doctor as she has been under weight her whole life, she's just tiny and skinny. Which I once was too so its not a huge concern, but she does need to eat frequently and healthily. So, I have a good handle on how to keep her going.

The problem is that my metabolism no longer works that way. When I turned 45 it just up and left me. (It didn't even leave a note!) So now, I am dieting to drop 7 pounds. Not huge, just I am not at all used to dieting. How do I stay on a diet while making sure she eats 6 times a day??

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L.M.

answers from New York on

Ugh. I would lose weight if I didn't love to eat cookies and drink a mug of hot chocolate every night! LOL!

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M.P.

answers from St. Louis on

If you find your metabolism, will you see if it eloped with mine? Mine has been gone for years and no matter how many milk cartons I advertise on, I haven't seemed to be able to track it down. :) HAPPY FRIDAY!

Sorry, I can't help with the losing weight part...........I obviously have not mastered that yet.

5 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Well... know that larger -but inadequate- infrequent meals (aka normal "dieting") is a guaranteed way to GAIN weight. Not at first, at first you'll lose a couple pounds, but it tanks your metabolism, so be prepared to gain back double what you lose.

THE BEST way to lose weight is to eat 6x a day and be active.

THE BEST way to gain weight is to starve yourself for a little while ESP if you yo-yo and do the starve-normal-starve-normal

I know it sounds backwards... it sounds backwards for the very good reason that the way people usually "diet" doesn't work! Or all of America would be skinny-skinny

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A.G.

answers from Provo on

Honestly, eating frequently and healthily will help you lose weight as well. There's a reason the diet industry is so blasted huge...if diets worked you wouldn't find so many people that had tried so many different ones unsuccessfully! 7 pounds really isn't a lot at all...so maybe a little diet would work, if you can maintain after that...but I've known so many people that have dieted, hashed their metabolism...and then gained it all back and then some.

(Be grateful your metabolism left you at 45 - mine took off at 30....:p)

3 moms found this helpful

M.M.

answers from Chicago on

The good news is that if you also eat 6 times a day, it'll HELP you lose weight. :)
That's the #1 trick to boosting metabolism. You just have to make sure that you're eating the RIGHT foods.

You know the bottom line here. Fruits, veggies, lean meats. For you, eat 200-300 calories at a time. "Mini meals". For her, whatever she needs to keep up her weight - I'm guessing you know that already. But she can eat what you do. As long as it's healthy, it's good.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Eat with her just smaller portions.

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K.H.

answers from Reno on

I'm 6 ft and was 110 pounds in high school. She might catch up. My doctors had me drinking Ensure shakes with 3 meals a day plus I was allowed to have snacks in class and was allowed ice cream several times a week(didn't work). I would start with those shakes and also try adding a tablespoon of olive or vegetable oil to whatever she is eating once a day.

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

Just watch your portion sizes and you should do great. I am on Weight Watchers and I have way more weight to lose than you, but I can eat everything anybody else does, just have to watch my portions. Just eat based on serving size and if you go out just eat half and you should do great. She can eat her meals and not worry about portion size etc.

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E.J.

answers from Lincoln on

My son and I have different weight needs. He has failure to thrive and is on a high calorie diet. I have regular old me who is losing the excuse that I had a baby since the baby is 6!!! I have to laugh at our food storage b/c it looks like we are roommates. He has whole milk and I have skim. He has regular syrup while I have the lite. He gets a generous helping of peanut butter and I get a measly thumb sized portion. He gets milk with almost every meal while I have to drink water. (He does take in some water, but not as much as I do!) So on an so forth.

It's always interesting when I'm at the store and I'm looking for foods that have MORE calories for him when most Mamas seem to be looking for the low cal option for their kiddos. :-) But, there are many times we eat together and eat similar things but he gets more or the higher cal option whereas I get less or low cal.

I guess where I am going with this is have higher calorie options around for her (ie whole mik vs skim) and lower calorie options around for you! Hope this helps, but I know what you're going through... it's tough! Good luck!!!!

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M..

answers from Detroit on

I would sit down and come up with a meal plan for both of you. Stick to yours, she sticks to hers.
Sometimes, I have to slap myself not to eat my kids left over food.
Lots of fruits and veggies for both of you, just stick peanut butter on hers.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

You stay on your diet and also eat 6 times a day with her. Both of you eat healthy choices. She can pack on things like peanut butter, avocados and the like, while you snack on things that are more weight friendly, eating 6 small meals/snacks a day will help you lose weight.

I was in her same position at that age, and even had to have an endocrinologist intervene and threaten me to eat, otherwise I would be fed weekly via iv's until I put on weight. (I was not anorexic/bulimic) I just didn't eat much or have an appetite. It is something I have struggled with all my life, and now suffer from pretty bad hypoglycemia which could turn into diabetes... so you really need to help teach her to eat properly. My Dr had me to drink the Carnation breakfast drinks/shakes and eat protein bars a few times a day as well.

N.N.

answers from Detroit on

I drink the Green Smoothie which has helped me.

http://www.kimberlysnyder.net/blog/2011/04/19/access-holl...

http://www.kimberlysnyder.net/blog/2011/10/10/how-to-get-...

Ingredients (64 ounces / 2-4 servings)
1 ½- 2 cups very cold, filtered water
6 cups spinach, chopped
5 cups organic romaine lettuce, chopped
2 stalks of organic celery
1 organic apple, cored and chopped
1 organic pear, cored and chopped
1 organic banana
1–2 Tbs. fresh organic lemon juice
Optional Ingredients
Ice cubes (the extra coldness can help newbies with the taste)
1/2 cup of organic cilantro
1/2 cup of organic parsley
Directions
Add water, spinach and chopped romaine to the blender. Starting the blender on a low speed; mix until smooth.
Gradually move to higher speeds and add the herbs, celery, pear, and apple. Add the banana and lemon juice last.

*For 1 serving, cut out one of the fruits and the celery.

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M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

The key is keeping things separate in your mind. I have an eight-year-old who hates to eat. It's a battle to get him to eat at all and that's even with high-fat foods the doctors want us to feed him. I was nagging him to "finish that piece of pizza" while I was on Weight Watchers trying to lose! It was one crazy life and still is.

Treat each situation differently. When you're feeding her, it's not about food, it's about health. Give your full attention to helping her be healthy. When you eat, it's all about keeping yourself healthy. Don't try to mesh your meal choices because chances are, they need to be very different. If you can keep your mindset different for each situation, you'll do fine. I still lost the 20 lbs. I needed to on WW while nagging our son to finish his ice cream. :)

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

Instead of keeping too much or unhealthy food in the house buy meal replacement shakes. I am dieting now and I replace two meals a day with these shakes. This is a program I sell, so on the occasion when I meet someone that wants to gain weight I just suggest they drink one of these shakes in addition to their regular 3 meals a day. It's a 4th healthy meal....... maybe as a snack right after school. I'd be glad to send you a link to look at these if you don't already have a product you like.

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