How to Help Conceive?

Updated on February 28, 2008
E.D. asks from Dallas, TX
32 answers

My husband and I tried 8 times during my fertile ovulation time one month and nothing. Is it stress? Can that prevent conception or getting pregnant? What's good advice for someone not necessarily trying to get pregnant, but would like for it to happen. I get uptight and nervous and frustrated when I find out nothing has happened. Just to give you a little insight...my hubby had colon cancer about 4 years ago. He's fine now...but sometimes things don't always work. Anyway, I haven't been using birth control for over 4 years now and still nothing...not even a scare. HELP!!! I'm tired of all my friends and family getting pregnant, but not me!

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So What Happened?

Sorry gals....forgot to update everyone on this. I had a baby...had to get help from my doctor who is awesome btw. After having an HCG test and getting all the other tests out of the way, I started Clomid and took 3 months of it. Month 3 at 2 pills for 5 days got me pregnant with a boy. He is now 6 months old. Name is Matthew Scott. Hopefully there will be more babies to follow him...with gaps in between of course.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

Have you tried ovulation predictors or are you charting on a calender to determine when you are ovulating? My doctor said it is common for women not to ovulate at "average intervals." I bought 1 pack of ovulation predictors and conceived right away after 2 months of no luck. It might just be a timing thing. I was an early ovulater.

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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

How old are you? It took me 11.5 yrs. to conceive. I have years of advice but it may not be the direction you want to go. J.

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K.G.

answers from Dallas on

Have you tried using an ovulation predictor? I think they even have the sticks (similar to home pregnancy tests) now without having to buy the machine. It will tell you when you are the most fertile. For example, my best friend and I both ovulate around day 18 - 19 rather than day 14. We did not realize this until we used the ovulation predictor. You can buy these at the drugstore. I hope that is helpful!

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

Holly Baril at ____@____.com can assist you with natural family planning to work with your cycle to achieve or avoid pregnancy. The success rates are amazing!

1 mom found this helpful
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T.S.

answers from Dallas on

E.,

Maybe consider having a consultation with Dr. Pinto. He is in Carrollton and other locations, Coppell and Grapevine. He is so wonderful, I don't use him, but have spoke to patients and seen his work. He is a reproductive endocrinologist and also practicies in infertility, and helping women , also check out the Trinity Medical Center website about the infertility and transfers they do. Great personality and really explains to his patients.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hi E.,
You might want to get your Thyroid levels checked. We had the same problems you are having but once I had my levels checked and got on medication, we were pregnant within 6 months. And yes, stress can have adverse effects on trying to get pregnant. Hope this helps.
L.

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C.G.

answers from Dallas on

My husband and I have used Natural Family Planning to avoid pregnancy for almost 5 years and achieve pregnancy 3 times. It is 100% accurate. You can learn more at www.creightonmodel.com or ask me. Good luck.

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L.H.

answers from Dallas on

I was you 10 years ago! Trying to concieve and wanting to be pregnant sooooooo bad! We finally got tested and found out my husband is sterile. Since then, we have adopted 3 beautiful boys, as infants. They are currently 7, 4, and 1. We could not be happier as to how God put our family together and 3 boys are now in a safe, happy, loving family environment! God has taken away all my desires to be pregnant too! Also, we went throught the state for our adoptions and there is no shortage of beautiful babies at literally little ($200) to no cost!!! I highly recommend looking into it! Would love to give you more info. if you are interested!

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hi there - I know how frustrating it is. If you haven't been using birth control for four years, I think a work-up may be in order both with a reproductive endocrinologist or at the very least, a semen analysis for your husband. It can't hurt, and may help ... please send me a note if you want more information about any of this. Best of luck to you!

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B.A.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, stress can prevent you from getting pregnant. Go on vacation and RELAX! Once you stop trying is usually when it happens. Have you both been to the doctor? I would go and see what they say. If there is nothing wrong, then seriously, plan a vacation, have fun and forget about it for a while.

I will be praying for you and your husband.

Blessings,
B.

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J.R.

answers from Phoenix on

Yes, stress can definetly contribute to not being able to get pg. I would go to your OB-GYN or, at this point, possibly an infertility specialist because there are a lot of different things that can be contributing to it. Generally they say that if you have been trying for a year and nothing has happened to get checked out.

It took us 2 1/2 years to have our kids, and over a year of that was doing infertility treatment, so if you want to talk or have any questions that I might be able to answer, I'd be hapy to talk to you. Good luck!!

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

My husband and I tried for five years to have a baby and nothing. I even had five IUI's done and nothing ever happened. I do feel that stress can be a factor in all this. You want to be pregnant so bad and everyone around you can get preg. and for you it can be very stressful. I do remember that during our time of problems all my friends were getting pregnant and I could not understand why. I think sometimes by taking a break for about a month or so and reconnecting as husband and wife that it will happen. We were never able to have one of our own but we did adopt the most precious baby boy and our lives couldn't be better. Just give it time and the Good Lord will bless you with children.

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M.E.

answers from Dallas on

I sincerely hope your schedule allows you to attend this free Spring Brunch. This is not a product seminar but a biblically based seminar that is directed towards women's health.

Speaker: Lilli Hetherington. She can be heard on the Word 100.7 FM and has been in the nutrition field for over 30 years

When: Saturday, March 1, 2008
Time: 9:30 - 11:30 a.m., Light breakfast from 9:30 - 10:00
Location: Sojourn Church, 4041 Marsh Lane Carrollton TX 75007 ~ ###-###-####

Register/RSVP for this Free Event: http://www.sojournchurch.org/ladies_coffee_with_lilli_het...

Email me for a flier. -M

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

I really think stress does cause you to not be able to conceive. I tried for a year to get pregnant and month after month I would get frustrated. Finally some friends of mine prayed that I would get pregnant and when I finally relaxed and left it in God's hands I became pregnant and now have a beautiful little girl to show for it. I know how frustrating it is to have every friend get pregnant before you. My best friend and my husbands best friend's wife both weren't trying to get pregnant and did before me. I thought I would scream if one more person told me they were pregnant. Hang in there. I will be praying for you.

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T.W.

answers from Dallas on

I am sorry to hear about your problems. Has your husband been checked out by a specialist? I just read the most doctors assume it is the woman's fault and sometimes the couple will spend thousands of dollars on IVF treatments just to find out it is the husband's problem. I hope this helps and pray you are pregnant soon.

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L.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

I've been where you are. We didn't get pg until 51/2 years of marriage. We tried everything, I mean everything, including me standing on my head after having sex. LOL now, but I wantd a baby that bad. I changed jobs (previous was a nightmare) then a friend and I started Weight Watchers. I lost 30 pounds and found out I was pg. Don't know if you have any weight to lose or not but if you do you might try it. Matter-of-fact with our second child we decided we were going to start trying I was still doing WW but not really the way I was suppose to be, any way I had lost almost 30 when I found out I was pg with him. To say the least I'm fixed now and still doing WW, but no chance of any more babies.

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

Hi E.,

I would first get your husband checked before you do anything else. Your OB could send you to a clinic and most insurance will pay for testing to discover infertility, if not it is probably around $100.

A little about me: My DH and I tried for 3 years before we found out there was a male factor. Once we found that out we had to do IVF, it help lift that horrible monthly disappoinment a little. We did one round of IVF/ICSI and we have a absolutley beautiful, wonderful, amazing daughter. It is very heartbreaking and I have broken down dozens of times about it. Even yelled at God and I am a strong Christian. It took me saying I surrender and knowing he was going to take care of us, period no matter His plan and it would be perfect. Looking back now I feel that he put me through those trials to help others. Please just get your husband checked and rule him out, then you can stress on the other stuff, but if it is him then you know and you can tackle it from a different angle.

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D.B.

answers from Dallas on

We had similar issues. Have you talked to your OBGYN? I would definitely do that...they can run a simple blood test to see if your hormone levels are normal? You may not be ovulating regularly. Are you actually doing the ovulation sticks every morning to determine your ovulation time? If not I would highly recommend doing that. That is how we finally got pregnant. After months of the stick coming up nothing...one morning it actually said I was ovulating. We tried and got pregnant. I did not ovulate regularly and was just about to go on clomid when we found out I was pregnant. However, stress is a big issue...I quickly came to terms that if I couldn't get pregnant we were going to look at adoption. I honestly believe that helped put my mind at ease. For me (us) personally it didn't matter if the child was biologically ours...we just wanted a family. We discussed this early on in the process and determinted that we wouldn't spend tons of money on in vitro, etc. Now we have two beautiful, healthy kids...the 2nd came along as a complete surprise. Our first was only 6 months old at the time. It seems that after the first baby evertying just started working again like normal. Also, has your husband been tested to make sure everything is working in his area? I would recommend that too. There are several tests that both of you can do to make sure all is ok. Because even though you say you "aren't trying to get pregnant" you really want to be and that can put lots of stress on you. Best of luck - try to relax (easier said than done, I know) and let natural take is course : )!

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H.G.

answers from Dallas on

I can completely relate to the frustration of not getting pregnant. I tried for two years to have a baby. We went throught the whole gammat of fertility treatments and finally decided to do in-vitro. The month before I was going to do in-vitro we decided to stop "officially" trying to have a baby. The day I went in to start the in-vitro process was the day I found out I was pregnant.

The one month that we didn't stress about it I got pregnant. After I stopped nursing my son at a year we started discussing having another baby and I got pregnant the first unofficial try.

Having said all that, if I was you I would have each of you checked to make sure there is nothing preventing a pregnancy and then just have fun and don't stress.

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S.K.

answers from Dallas on

hi E.
may i start with saying i know your exact feelings. After "waiting for it to happen" and then trying for 3 1/2 years, i cried myself to sleep countless nights. It's hard i know especially when everyone else seems to have the family you so despratly want! This may seem a little "graphic" maybe but it worked for us. We were told by a couple who tried for a while that if the man will increase his soda/chocolate intake and the woman her water intake and start taking pre-natels that helps. Also, trying differant posistions and don't "clean up' right away. This sounds silly but i crossed my legs and put them in the air for about 15 min or so to help the swimmers :) i was desperate and tried nearly everything. I did research on conception so you might try that as well. I know its hard but remember that when its time for you...it's time....don't rush it b/c the time you have with your husband is precious, enjoy eachother and the time you have without the worry of schedules of a baby and the up all nights! Its amazing how your life really does change when the 1st comes along! :) Good luck and be praying for your time to come!!!!
S.

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T.M.

answers from Dallas on

E., you don't mention how old you are, if you have any medical conditions that would be interfering with concieving, or whether your hubby had chemo. have you talked with you doc about this? I would suggest you do, and get some lab work, including fsh on day 3 of period to see how your ovaries are working. maybe a sono to see if you have PCOS, may I ask are you overweight or is there diabetes in family?

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

i would get a full work up on both of you and see what the issue is. maybe you can't afford to do IVF or some of the other options, but you'll atleast have some information. if it's him, there's lots of non-invasive treatments like vitamins that works really well. my second baby is a post vasectomy reversal baby. best of luck!

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T.W.

answers from Dallas on

I just signed up for a website to learn all about it. It's very interesting and very detailed information. It might help before you do anything that might cost money. Check it out... FertilityFriend.com

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P.P.

answers from Dallas on

Trust God!!! We have one daughter, never used birth control but The Creighton model of NFP (Natural family planning) We were blessed with our daughter right away and when she was a year old we started actively trying again and using the fertility cycle to predict ovulation - it has taken us two and a half years!! We are now preganant with no 2 but we know it was God's timing and not ours for this second blessing. We looked into www.popepaulVI.com which is an amazing facility in Omaha, Nebraska to treat fertility issues and women's health naturally and without the use the harmful chemicals and procedures. Perhaps an assessment there would highlight some issues that may need treatment.

God Bless
P.

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T.D.

answers from Dallas on

I have found that when you stop trying so hard, and stressing you are normally blessed with conception. That is how it happened with two of my three children. If it is ment to be, God will bless you in His time. The more you concentrate and stess over it, the more disappointing it is on you. The more disappointed you are in it, may put undo pressure on your husband or make him feel inadequate and create a sensitive area in your marriage. If you are a God praying women, just leave it in his hands and fret no more.

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

A friend recommended the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and I thought it was a wealth of information.....check it out. I even saw a copy at Half Price. IT is thick with LOTS of info, but I did not have to read the whole thing...just the parts for my concerns.

I did read All of a small book called "Supernatural Childbirth" after my miscarriage. Super book anyone who believes in God. A must read. Small, easy to read.
Keep Faith.

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N.G.

answers from Dallas on

check out the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. you can find the original edition in used bookstores; the new 10th anniversary edition on amazon.
you'll be amazed (as I was) at what you don't know about your own body and how it all works!
Best of luck and God Bless!

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J.W.

answers from Dallas on

E., you already know that you have been stressing over something that you have no control. God is in control, and when we allow Him to do just that, then everything will "fall" into place!I have prayed for many women to concieve, and basically, they did. It wasn't anything that I did, except believe God's word, speak/claim the word of God over the lives of the individuals, and God performed His will! God's will is that you will be "fruitful, and multiply", and I speak this over you, in the name of Jesus. I come against any hinderance in this conception, I come against every spirit that is not of God, and I thank God for intervening in your request in the name of Jesus! I am believing with you, that you will have a healthy baby, because the Bible says "anytime two touch/agree" that His Will, will be performed! Have a great day, and Thank God in advance!

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

Hi! I just want to let you know that my husband and I tried for a year and a half to have our first little one. I had a miscarriage before that. I stressed and stressed. I had to quit my job and I told my husband that is probably wasn't a good time to keep trying and bam...I was pregnant. After I stopped thinking about it...I was pregnant! I hope this is a little encourging, because I know how frustrating it can be. Have you talked to your doctor about some fertility medicine, maybe clomid?

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D.W.

answers from Dallas on

I too had trouble conceving. We ended up with twins, who are now 12 years old. I help with a support group for women struggling with fertility issues. If you are interested, send me a message.

D.

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B.P.

answers from Dallas on

Hi E., Just relax. Stress can be an issue,but don't let it
get to you. Just relax and lay in bed after sex and don't get
up right away. Also, watch your intake of caffiene. You will be surprise how much caffiene one can intake without realizing. Good Luck!

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P.C.

answers from Dallas on

I had a fertility dr. tell me to try ten days after your period, every other day for ten days. It worked.
Good Luck!

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