How to Get Rid of the Pappy(pacifer)

Updated on January 05, 2010
B.D. asks from West Point, VA
11 answers

My son is almost 2(in March). He loves his pappy! I am so dreading to get rid of it, just the process! I thought of doing the whole only at nap time but that didnt go well. Oh he is really bad with it in the van... When he goes to nursey at church...he has to have it(He cries for it and even ask for it). I have tried like comforting him with something else like he has his blanket that he adores also, but he wants the pappy. He talks good for being almost 2 I think so I am worried it will hold back the speech. I have heard the stories...oh just throw them away or tell him the pappy fairy came and took them all but I dont want to go those routes( he's only one-I dont want it to be a bad experience). I think I may have to go cold turkey but I am just dreaded it!!!!BAD! When he took the bottle at night...I went cold turkey and he did really good. It took him like two nights to be without one to sleep thru the night so I am thinking he is the kind of kid that just does it cold turkey. Does any one have any ideas for me, they would so help!

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So What Happened?

It just so happened that about two or thee days later....we lost his pappy and really could not find one. It was too late I thought to run out and buy one(it was like 9:30 and he was in his crib waiting on it). So for that night I just patted him and he was allready so tired becasue of waiting he went down fine. Well in the morning of course it wasnt there so he didnt want it. As far as the next night I had decided well I not going to get one if he isnt asking for it so then the next night went fine too so I guess he was sortof ready to get rid of it....which makes me sad cuz he is growing up! He only asked for it a couple of times and I just started playing with something else or talked about something else....I guess whats funny to me is I wrote the question wondered how to get rid of it and it just happened a few days later:) Thanks for all the ideas and thoughts ladies...it really did mean alot!

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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

My 18 month old son had 2 binkies that he used. I read that if you cut them, they won't want to suck on them any more. Well after I read the article, he bit the first one and didn't want it any more. When we got home he threw it in the trash. Now we were down to one and I told him if he broke this one, that would be it. Well on 12/26, he bit a hole in the 2nd one. I told him that was it. He cried both times he broke the binky but it has now been two weeks and he is doing good. every once in a while he'll bring it up and I remind him that they went in the trash because he broke them.

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S.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I have 3 boys ages 8, 6 and 18 months. I did not take the pacifier away until the two older ones turned 3. When they were 2, I did mostly give it to them at nap, bedtime, or when I needed to get things done and they were exceptionally cranky. I will wait until 3 again with my 3rd child. We have a routine that when I get him out of bed we play a game of throwing the pacifier back into the bed. I will also grab the pacifier out of his mouth and run out of the room with him laughing. He forgets about the pacifer and starts laughing with me. He finally realized that he only gets the pacifier in bed. It is great, because he likes to lay in bed when he wakes up because he has the pacifier. He doesn't cry to get out of bed in the mornings. All 3 of my boys needed a lot of attention at 18 months +. When I played with them and kept them occupied, they did not think about the pacifier. I also gave them grahm crackers, snack bags of cheerios, etc, plus their sippy cups of water during the day to satisfy their need to have something in their mouths. Still when he is exceptionally cranky and I need to get things done, I will give him the pacifier and his blanket. Sometimes I put him back in his bed. I will wait until 3 before taking it away entirely. My older ones stopped taking their naps when I took away the pacifier. Good luck!

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C.B.

answers from Washington DC on

What worked for my last son who was very, very attached to the pacifier was to get us down to 1 of them left and then have it get lost (with your help)during a nap or night time sleep. When he woke up we looked and looked for it and, of course, couldn't find it. We couldn't go to the store for a few days because they were "closed" and we really looked everywhere together, but when we couldn't find it we decided to look again later. For the next time he wanted it we looked and looked again but, again, no luck. Each time I reminded him that it had gotten lost during nap and maybe it would turn up and maybe it was just lost. After about 2 or 3 days of this we gave up looking. That darned thing never did turn up ;-) There were tears, but looking for it seemed to help because we were doing something to try to get it for him. He was about 2 1/2 then and I would suggest you wait a little longer since 1 isn't really all that old for a pacifier. He won't go to college with it! Remember that they are only little once and, while it's something that needs to be done, there's no huge rush if he isn't even 2 yet. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Washington DC on

Our son was 2 when his brother was born-up to that point, he'd had the pacifier just for nap & bedtime, but started using it all the time. I finally made a deal with him-he'd been wanting a sprinkler, so on a very hot day, we agreed that he could choose a sprinkler & "pay" for it with his "nonnies". I handed them all to the cashier, who looked at me like I had 3 heads, but he never asked for them again-I actually found the bag of them when we moved a couple years later (yuck!) Obviously, it isn't sprinkler weather, but making a trade worked for my son-figure out what would be a powerful motivation for yours. Good luck to you!

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R.W.

answers from Dover on

My daughter, Megan was about 18 months when her big sister, Carol (3 y.o.) decided it was time to have a "Bye-bye pappy party." Carol and I were reading a Parents magazine where a mom talked about it. My two girls gave me a list of requirements (balloons, friends, cake ...) for the party, and I said that if we had the party the pacifiers would be gone for good. Megan agreed and couldn't wait for her party. The whole time I made sure she understood the pacifiers would be gone to the pappy fairy.
We had the party and boxed up all the pappies in a gift box and put them by the front door for the fairy to pick up. That night she asked for her pappy, and I reminded her we had the party and gave them away. She was fine and went to sleep. She needed reminding a couple other times, but we never had a problem.
The thing is, at the time, Megan only used her pappies to sleep. You may need to be at that point first. Prolonged pacifier use CAN cause problems with speech and teeth.
Hope this helps.

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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

My son is 19 months and has always gotten the binky for sleep only. He recently became more attached to it with the switch to the toddler bed. So, after a week of him constantly wanting one, even climbing on things to get them off the top of the dresser, my husband decided it was time to get rid of it. He put him to bed that night without, and he hasn't had one since.

Today is the 5th day without a binky and he's doing fine.
It takes him a little longer to fall asleep, but he hasn't even asked for it. He has seen other children with them and I thought we'd have a problem with him trying to steal them, but nope, he doesn't.

I say just take it away. Its going to be a couple hard nights, but then its over. Be strong! Its for the best and will save you loads in orthodontic bills in the future!!

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M.W.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi there,
My daughter just turned 2 a couple months ago, and we only used the binky for nap and bed times. She did great getting to that point, that started right at 1. We recently transitioned her into a toddler bed, about 3 onths ago and she did awesome with it and loves it so much more than the crib. There were 2 more things to transition to, getting rid of the binky and potty training and you can only do one thing at a time so you don't cause too much trama. So the binky was the next step, she loved her binkys and would stay in bed longer and go to sleep on her own, provided she had her binkys, and she had like 5 of them in her bed...lol.
We have a friend about to have a baby, although she has been told that the baby is inside, she may not really understand, afterall she is only 2! So I asked her, since she is a big girl princess, does she want to give her binkys to the baby that needs them and has none. She said yes!! So we put them in a bag with a bow, put them under the tree and I told my friend the plan and that she should really be excited with my daughter gives them, their whole family made such a big deal out of her bing so sweeet to give them to the baby, they would toss em when they got home, that was our secret. I know this is long, but you need to know the background and plan and what happened.
This is something she committed to until that night we decided to package them up, at this point she hadn't given them away yet. She said she didn't want to give them and wanted them back. That night was long, mommy and daddy both had to be in there until she fell asleep. Then next night was a little better, daddy stayed until she fell asleep. She did give the binkys to our friends, so she knew that they were gone and there was no going back. She had some of her fav babys in bed with her and I had gotten her a little Ni-Hao Kilan night light that you can hold and turn on and off and sing to have in bed with her so she would have a new thing in bed too. After 3 nights, she was able to go to sleep without the binky or asking for it. It was easier than I anticipated it to be. She is getting back on her schedule and not having one of us to be in her room until she sleeps. We accommidated her with being there because the binky was a huge part of sleeping, so we knew it would be rough. Now I tuck her in after giving hugs to daddy and read a story and get her babys and tuck her in and hold her a min then I leave. Oh and by the way, she did get another baby princess for doing an amazing job at kicking the binky, she had asked for it and I told her if she does good with no binky then I would get her another one. So she sleeps with both pricess babies! Sorry so long, but I wanted to share all the story and maybe you could get something out of it that would be helpful for you!
Good luck and God bless! You may have a few sleepless nights! The great thing is once she fell asleep wanting the binky, she stayed asleep and didn't continually wake looking for it. We will start potty training next! :-)

PS - If you continue with the binky/pappy too long and too often, it will reshape the roof of his mouth. We went a different route when my son was little, he had it more often than our daughter did. He is 9 and a year ago he had to have a retainer to help shape his roof back to a somewhat normal stage. It was because of the binky. My daughter goes to the dentist and has said it isn't bad and I told her it's only for sleeping and we would transition from it soon and she said it would be better sooner than later so it doesn't reshape her roof.

Hope this helps!!!

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J.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I let my oldest son use his "paci" until the day he turned 3. What's the big deal about taking it away now? He needs it for comfort and he is still so little.

My son only used the paci at night time and during naps. He would sleep so well with it! On his 3rd birthday we made a deal. Give up the paci and he would get some goldfish.

He never asked for the paci again, but within a few months, he stopped taking afternoon naps. I was a little sad!

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R.H.

answers from Norfolk on

that's how i would do it. Just throw them away and not bring them back. I just know if i smoked or drank i wouldn't want to cut back i would either want it or not. Cutting back only draws it out. so i would go cold turkey.

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L.Z.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi B.,
I have to say we still let our five year old go to sleep with his binky (pappy). He leaves them bye his bed and is not attached to them during the day. About 1 1/2 years ago he started leaving it in his car seat, so people wouldn't see him in public with it. Came up with that on his own. We have talked to him about him being to old and such, but he has mastered everything else on his own and we know his binkys aren't hurting him, they make him happy at bed and he'll eventually grow out of them. I have seen people gather all the binkys attach them to a bunch of ballons and let them go (binky fairy?) and then they recieve a great present to replace the binkys. We attach bandanas to the rings at the ends of the binkys to help find them easier. Good luck. Do what makes you and your child happy, not other people.

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S.B.

answers from Washington DC on

My oldest son used a binky until right before his 3rd birthday. I told him if he wanted his party then he couldn't have his binky because he was too old. It worked great although I did have to remind him of the fun presents and cake, etc a couple of times. My younger son's teeth were being affected by the binky so we had to take it away around 2 1/2. I told him he was too old and it was hurting his teeth. He did cry some but it wasn't too bad. Naps were worse than at night. Luckily we went to the dentist about a month after we took it away and she could already tell his teeth were moving back to where they were supposed to be. FYI I have met 3 and 4 year olds whom you could understand perfectly around the binky.

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