How to Get Married...

First, Congratulations! You get the license within days before the wedding - call the county courthouse in the county you are getting married for more information. It depends on the preacher as to who they will marry. Yes, the preacher will marry outside of the church. If you are happy with the ring, then that is all that matters. You can always get a different one at a later date. Or you can try a pawn shop for a 'real' one. Or go to James Avery and get two silver wedding bands for under 100.00! We did that - ours were 70.00 for both.

You can have a beautiful wedding on a budget!

We bought fresh flowers at the Farmer's Market for the bouquets and boutonnieres. We bought our wedding cake (plain, 3 tiered) at a local grocery store and added fresh flowers for decoration - it was gorgeous! We didn't have it catered, we had a backyard BBQ. Each side of the family donated something - my paternal side donated the meat and soft drinks, my maternal side donated the champagne and paid for my dress (dress was 200.00), his maternal side donated their yard for the reception and spent 6 months weeding and preparing the lawn (a huge job!),and prepped a sight on their land for 6 months (this was a pasture, it was a lot of work), where we were married. All of us bought stuff here & there like decorations (wildflowers & sunflowers were the theme), plates, plasticware, cups etc. A family friend cooked the brisket and others brought the sides dishes. My MIL made the poet shirts for the groomsmen (we were dressed in Renaissance style clothing). Family friends took the pictures and video taped the wedding. My MIL borrowed a covered wagon for the wedding party to ride up in and an Amish wagon for the bridal party. Homemade quilts from the community were donated and laid over bails of hay for the seating. No one spent very much money and it was a beautiful wedding. We have been married for 15+ years and people still comment on our wedding.

You don't need a lot of money to have the wedding of your dreams! Have fun on your new journey...

2 moms found this helpful

You need to get your marriage license before the wedding. The preacher can marry you anywhere you like. You can also use a justice of the peace. I think in the long run you will regret getting a fake diamond. Try going smaller, like a 1/4 karat, or you can get great deals at pawn shops, or estate sales. I've also seen some really nice jewelry offered online through estate sales. You can really catch good deals if you know where to look. Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials. I wish you lots of happiness!

2 moms found this helpful

The minister who married us wanted to meet with us a few times before he'd marry us. I was glad about that-- he gave me a lot of things to think about. If you are not religious or affiliated with a church at all, you can find someone else to perform the ceremony, like a friend who is a notary. Only you will know about your diamond, so if you're OK with fake then go for it. Maybe for one of your anniversaries one day you can "upgrade" if you want and if you have the money.All you really need is a band, though, and you don't have to have a stud at all if you don't want one. Keep your wedding super simple. Don't let anyone talk you into inviting people you don't really care about, like business associates and your mom's next door neighbor! Approach local florists and bakers and let them know you are trying to have a nice, small wedding on a budget and they should work with you. One thing that I did that I'll never forget... Mind you this was 13 years ago...but my cousin sent me I think it was $100 (wait--maybe it was $50...I can't remember the amount now, but it was less than half of the going rate)toward getting a limo...so I called around and asked every limo company in the phone book if they'd just give me a ride to the church for that amount and there were some who were downright cruel and laughed at me!! I didn't give up, though, and I kept calling all the ones in the phone book. I about fell out of my chair when I finally got someone to say yes! He said he remembered when he got married how important the little details were to his wife, and he'd hate to see a young bride not have the wedding of her dreams, so he not only gave me a ride for that price, but he hung out during the ceremony and insisted on giving me and my husband a ride to our friend's house where we had the reception.

2 moms found this helpful

Legally speaking, two people are married when they have gotten a marriage license from a courthouse. You go down, pay a fee (usually) both of you sign it, then an authorized person signs it and then it gets notarized.

Boom, you're married.

The church stuff is totally separate. It all depends on what religion, denomination or sect you belong to. If you're not religious at all - then having a wedding in a church is just a tradition thats kind of ingrained into society - but there is nothing about doing that that legitimizes a marriage.

And the ring thing is totally up to you! The important thing is that YOU guys like it. If you like it - then go for it! I know lots of people who don't even have rings.

Congratulations, by the way!

1 mom found this helpful

A marriage license is obtained before the wedding and like others have said, the rules vary from state to state so you will need to check what yours requires well enough in advance so that you are in compliance. As for the preacher, depends on the religion and sometimes it even depends on the preacher. I know with Catholics there are some that are more lax with the "rules" than others, some will not marry you if you've lived together before and some will not marry you if you do not go to their church, others don't bat an eye at any of that. Anyone can be given the power to marry you from the state in which you live and will be married. A legal marraige is not the same thing as a church marraige, but in the US they are often done as one and the same and a priest/preacher has the legal power to marry you as well as marry you in the eyes of God. I think it's perfectly fine to do a "fake" ring or, why not do a pretty gemstone in your favorite color instead of a diamond? The ring is a symbol, and personally I believe it is important, but it doesn't have to be expensive. A beautiful wedding can happen on a budget, but be prepared to work hard for it. Be flexible with dates, ask for discounts, negotiate a lot! I got to have my dream white trolley for my wedding party to ride in for half price! All because I asked for it and when the price was too high, I challenged them to go lower. I also got my reception venue to wipe out the cost of tax and gratuity and give me a free cake, only because I was flexible with my event date and had it during their "off season." One of my best friends went to a craft store and picked out her favorite silk flowers and made hers and all of her bridesmaid's bouquets, and you would never have guessed they were fake in the photos! And she spent less than $150 to do it, instead of the thousands that a florist would have charged. Also, centerpieces do not have to be floral, she did candles. One thing I would definitely not leave out is the photographer AND videographer, even if you just have a good friend do it instead of a professional. But make sure they do not run out of battery! There will be some beautiful moments, speeches, and other things that you may not see or have the time to appreciate fully during the moment. Trust me, you will be busy and the day/night will fly by, so you'll want solid, tangible memories that you can look back at and appreciate. Good luck, planning a wedding is so much fun, I wish I could do it again ;) j/k!! Congratulations!

1 mom found this helpful

A friend of mine had a black stone as her wedding/engagment ring. It's beautiful and totally "her" - get whatever kind of ring you like!

1 mom found this helpful

Since you've already got a lot of advice on the marriage part, I'll just give my two cents on the ring. There are lots of other pretty stones besides diamonds that are much cheaper. You can get a sapphire, emerald or ruby ring for a couple of hundred dollars or cheaper. Another place to look for nice jewelry for cheap would be craig's list or e-bay & sometimes resale shops or antique stores have jewelry sections & estate sales. With the economy the way it is people are selling their old jewelry for much less that it is worth.

Good luck & God Bless!

1 mom found this helpful

Great question, I wouldn't know which steps to take either. As far as the ring, my view is give me something fake and affordable, then for our 5 or 10 year anniversary, give me the real thing. A lot of people simply can't afford to shell out big money right now, and no one has to know it's not real, you know? HOWEVER my guy refuses to buy a fake ring because he says I deserve the real thing... that's sweet and everything, but I'd be honestly happy either way. Best wishes!

1 mom found this helpful

The license is first. You must obtain a license from the county in which you are getting married. Likewise, you must have an ordain minister or justice of the peace (courthouse) marry you in that same county. They must be ordain in that county. The minister, yourself, husband, and the witness must sign the marriage license and submit it back to the clerk or court and then they will issue a certified marriage certificate. Then you are married. The rest is up to you. You can even have a reception next year for your anniversary if that is what you want to do. It is your day!!! You should have a photographer (wink*wink*).

My sister was married by a priest outside the Catholic Church and she was pregnant. You just have to find a priest that will do it. If that is what you are looking for, call every church to see if they will do it. Further, if you are catholic, the church will make you go to marriage classes prior to your ceremony. Some non-catholic churches will do so as well, so you may want to make some of these calls ahead of time to be sure to allow the appropriate amount of time.

Your ring can be fake, or you can go to a pawn shop. Check this site out.
www.propertyroom.com If you click on the jewelry, you will find they get appraisals on the items and they sometimes sell for half the price or less.

Congratulations!!

1 mom found this helpful

Just wanted to say, I loooooove the ring idea!!! We purchased silver bands from James Avery for about $35 each. Five years down the road - we are still in love and hubby still has his ring. I still have mine, but I've lost 100lbs, so it doesn't fit. But...we are in search of another one...Hey! I'm taking off early today - maybe we'll go look today! :) Good luck and Happy Marriage! PS - I have a friend, who is all about name brands. She insisted on a diamond, but that wasn't in the budget. He offered the James Avery version, but still - wasn't enough. So, he got her a band from Tiffany's (seriously - it was like $900). A year later, he paid up on the diamond he 'owed' her. She got it...but I don't know - I just think our story of being frugal and on a budget is more romantic than being 'owed' a ring. HA!HA!

1 mom found this helpful

Yes, you need to go to the courthouse before hand to get a wedding license. Depending on the state there are certain things involved such as blood tests and waiting periods. I am not sure what they are in the state of California and I am not sure if it is different county to county so it is best to check WAY in advance. You also have to check with your minister to see if they are willing to marry you elsewhere. Some do not do weddings on Sundays because of service times. As for the ring, that is up to you. =) Personally we could not afford an expensive band and went with a solid platinum band for each of us. My mother gave my her mother's wedding ring later and I wear it with my wedding band. It isn't about the ring, it is about the commitment. =)
It helps to plan at LEAST 6 months in advance. Depending on your venue and who will prepare the food, etc. you may have no choice but to plan far in advance. Be prepared to put money down as well.
Good luck on your marriage!

1 mom found this helpful

Here is a link to where we bought my ring. I think they are really pretty and a lot more afforadable.

http://diamondnexuslabs.com/?gclid=CLninfS5jKECFQtL5wodZG...

Congrats!:)

1 mom found this helpful

you must have the marriage license before you get married, because the preacher must sign. Most preacher will do the wedding where you want it.Why do a ring if you are trying to save money? Or how about for wedding rings a simple golden band that when time comes on you could add an annvis. band to. If you are doing an out door wedding let God be your decoretor. Just add an alter stand with you colors on it.

Good Luck and God Bless,
T.

1 mom found this helpful

You need a marriage license, even in Las Vegas.
A priest may not marry you outside of a church but other denominations are different. You can also be married by a justice of the pace or a judge I believe.
Make your wedding what you want. I think the thing to keep in mind is that if you want it simple--keep it simple, don't try to "fake" a fancy wedding. Simpler is often better!
You can do a private ceremony and host a dinner, picnic, etc. There are tons of options.
As for the ring, I'll bet there are lots of people out there wearing 10K rocks on their fingers and renting a shabby apartment--you're on the right track for a future of financial stability! Congratulations!

1 mom found this helpful

I know where we live we had to have a license 3 days beforehand. We had a justice of the peace marry us. And he came to where we wanted to get married. As for the ring thing. That's totally up to u! You're the bride and if you're satisfied with it then that's your business! As long as you're happy!

When we got married my husband got me a ring for $600 at Macys. It was gold with tiny (real) diamonds. About 10 years later we inherited a nice diamond ring and that's what I wear today. I personally would rather have something real and small than fake. Even a simple gold band would be acceptable.

You buy the marriage license befoer the wedding. Yes, a preacher can go to a location but that decision depends on the preacher. You would have to ask the one you are interested in. The ring is totally up to you. You wear whatever you want.

T.

If you and you Fiance have decided on where and when you need to call the court house in that county and find out when you need to get your license. Most places you can only have it a few days prior to the ceremony or it is expired. You may have to do blood tests, they used to test for some diseases and other things but now days I am not sure what the purpose serves. So some places have done away with them.

I have done weddings with as little as 1 days notice. We baked a cake and had punch at the "reception". The brides dress is usually the biggest expense and you can find just the right thing if you take your time and look around. My sister got her antique/victorian wedding dress at a resale shop for about $100 and it was beautiful. Usually a wedding dress reflectes the type of wedding you have.

If the dress has a long train, cathederal length, then the ceremony is usually at a church with the full works, flower girl, ring bearer, candle lighters, bridesmaids and groomsmen, formal pictures, special musical mnumbers, etc...very formal.

A chapel length train is a few feet long and is still usually for inside. The train can become very dirty and ruined outside, you would need to cover the ground anywhere you will be walking. This style is for less formal church wedding, or like a room at a banquet hotel. We had my sister's wedding at a local community center and decorated the day before the wedding.

A long, floor length dress is very versitile and can be worn both inside and out. Something soft, with gathers, and floaty would be beautiful at the beach where something sleek and form fitting would be nice in a park setting where walking would be easier.

I have done weddings where they wore western clothes and had a barn dance, wore street clothes and then went to the State fair after. What ever you and your fiance want is perfect for you. A reception is a fun way to introduce your family to his family ,etc...everyone can make a party out of it. Some churches don't believe in dancing so that also makes a difference on where you have the activities. You can have a wedding and reception in a few days with careful planning or you can make plans for months. But the bottom line is that it's your day, make it what you want. A cake can be purchased at Wal-Mart or any bakery if you take what they have and add something of your own to it like the poster a few down said about adding flowers to hers.

I was waiting for a court proceeding and a couple came in and wanted to get married. They had a very beautiful wedding right there in the court room with the Judge officiating. The ceremony was totally non-religious and very much about becoming a united family. It was the nicest wording I have ever heard.

I sold "man made" diamonds at the state fair for several years and saw some beautiful rings. You need to understand these rings are manufactured, they aren't as sturdy as a real stone. Many real stones aren't even supposed to be in water, like opals, they turn very murky if they are exposed to hot water for very long. You are going to have to take an artificail ring off every time you shower or wash a dish. If you are really on the fence about the cost of a solitaire the think about something else. I got a solitaire for my enganement ring, then a solid, plain, band to go along side of it. One thing I have seen people do is get an eternity band for an anniversary present years later. It is a band with stones set in it that goes either all the way around or can be just a few stones on the front. I got mine when my husband and I were sealed in the Temple a year after or wedding. You could choose to do something like this instead of a traditional wedding set. There are many choices out there. My best friend has a band that had Celtic looking bands interwoven and it is very beautiful. Choose something that reflects you and your fiance as a couple.

Find your preacher/officiant first so you know they can do your date, your location, and to see if they require counseling sessions (many do and want them many months out). Apply for the license early, you will need blood work before the state will let you get married, so it is important to plan ahead. There are many websites where you can get check lists to help keep you on track.

If you like silver, a sterling silver ring with a CZ can be quite beautiful.
I have a real gold diamond ring and because it is low quality diamonds, it doesnt really sparkle like a fine quality diamond would. It almost looks dirty.I mean it was a $2500 ring at service merchandise 16 yrs ago. We should have opted for a smaller diamond weight or a CZ, instead of a low quality stone. Funny thing is, I don't even wear it, because the prongs stick up high and are squared off/sharp. (another feature of cheap diamond rings). I had my husband buy me a gold band for my anniversary and that is what I wear everyday.

Stay on a buget. So many people think it is about the day of the wedding but it really is about the rest of your lifes. Also get a fake and live it up or go to Costco an buy it at whole sale. But do what you want to do.

You don't have to have a diamond. Engagement rings are not a requirement. I didn't have one.

You have to have the license first. You have to bring ID. What specici ID is required depends on where you live. Some states require both parties to be ther to buy the license, some only require one, but the one must have both people's ID with him/her. Call your Clerk of Court's office to see what their conditions are so you don't waste a trip.
A minister can conduct a wedding anywhere the couple wants - in the church, at a park, in their home, in a hot air balloon, in a Wal-Mart parking lot. Any minister can conduct the wedding, although some religions have specific requirements. For a Catholic priest to do it, for example, both people must be Catholic, and they usually require a series of pre-marital classes. If you practice different religions, your best bet might be a Unitarian minister.
As for rings, I didnt have an engagement ring. We were on a very tight budget, and I hate sparkly stones anyway. For our wedding bands, we bartered with a local jeweler who owned his own store rather than going to a chain like Kay or Zale's. We both had some old gold jewelry that we no longer wore, and we traded it for part of the cost of a pair of plain sterling silver wedding bands.
We held our wedding in our living room with about a dozen friends and family members present. We prepared all the food for the reception ourselves and kept it simple - cucumber sandwiches, cheese and crackers, nuts, raw veggies and dip, spinach dip and crackers. We bought a few bottles of champagne, wine, and sake, and sodas for our underage guests. We wore clothes that we already owned, and trimmed them with matching ribbons, and I wove the same colors of ribbon into my hair. Our total cost for everything was a couple hundred dollars, and it was the perfect wedding for us.