How to Get a Girl to Pee in the Potty Vs. Go Immediately After Sitting on It

Updated on August 04, 2008
M.M. asks from Houston, TX
19 answers

I need insight ladies. I'm a FTWM who's trying to potty train her first. I read the books and got us both prepared. Yesterday we started by going to the potty every hour. She inititally wasn't happy with it, but got comfortable pretty quickly with it. She never went into it, but seemed a few times to almost wait till she was off. I say that since a few times she'd sit on the potty and like 3 minutes later she was standing up peeing in another room. Help. Anyone gone through this and learned a trick? I know all Moms train so love any responses.

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So What Happened?

Thank you for the responses. I thought about it more and realized with most of you we need to just wait a bit. I'm not in a rush, but since I had seen signs thought I'd try. Thanks again!

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S.D.

answers from Dallas on

Get ahold of the book called "Potty Training in a Day" Follow it to a tee and it will work beautifully stress free no spanking its great let me know if you cant find it.

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

I just finished potty training my 3 yr old little boy, and we had the same issue. Then a friend suggested that we reward him for being dry. Still set him on the potty every 30 minutes, but reward him for being dry instead of going in the potty. He realized that to stay dry, eventually, he would have to go in the potty. And he started out holding it until he couldn't hold it any longer. Then he let it go into the potty. It worked in about a day. But he is also 3 yrs old. Since every kid is different, I say, give it a try and see if she likes being rewarded for being dry instead of "going" in the potty.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

Potty training is one area that you have to take their cue on... no matter how many books you read.... it doesn't matter. you need to take their cue on it. and look for the signs that she is ready before success will happen -- and success happens in stages - not all at once (first - success in peeing in potty when they sit down; then success in holding it in between trips; then bowel movements in the potty; then nighttime potty training).

Is she keeping her diaper dry? Is it dry when she wakes up from naps? Does she feel remorseful when she has an accident? these are all signs that she's ready. This is something that can't be forced. Trust me.... I tried!
You really do have to wait for them and just keep encouraging with positive reinforcement -- rewarding system when she does sit on the potty and does something (stars/stickers or 1-2 M&Ms or smarties - whatever works best for her) and of course LOTS of verbal praise. When accidents happen -- just let her know how disappointed you are - but that's all. Just so she knows it's not alright to have an accident. because they'll keep having them if you keep saying "it's alright. no big deal. we'll try next time."
i tried saying that for months -- and he didn't change. it wasn't until i let him know how disappointed i was that things changed. but it depends on if your child responds well to your feelings or not -- some don't at all -- that's just their personality.
just have patience - it usually never happens overnight or in a matter of one week.

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B.H.

answers from Dallas on

wait till she is closer to 3.

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D.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hi Michelle,

My name is D. and I know what you are saying about the potty training. It can be frustrating at times. I have a 4 1/2 and a 3 1/2 ( one of each girl older ). What my husband and I did with both children and it worked. Is reward them with stickers. I put a sheet of paper with Anna's Potty Sheet by where her potty chair was sitting. I would take her and we would both sit on the potty. I would go through the routine and pull both of our shorts and undergarments and sit on the potty. Anna was told if she went peepee she would get to pick a sticker and put it on her sheet. If she did the other she would get to pick out two stickers. It also worked with our son. I started with them at this around 2yrs of age. I have friends that I gave this suggestion on and they are telling me that it works. Hope it works for you and your daughter.

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P.B.

answers from Tyler on

Have you "shown" her how to go? If she sits on HER potty while YOU sit on the toilet and YOU actually go sometimes this helps. If you are uncomfortable with doing this yourself, get a potty training doll that actually pees. You can also keep a few small tootsie rolls handy to make the doll "poop". (That's what worked for my older son.)

Another trick is to give her some activities that will "get her mind off it" while she is sitting. This will help her body to relax and go. I suggest putting a TV tray into the bathroom and keep a basket of books and small puzzles or "one-piece" activities.

Good luck!

Blessings,

P. <><

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S.M.

answers from Dallas on

2 is early, but every child is different so she may truly be ready. We used "The Potty Dance" for our daughter. Everyone has their own rendition but ours was a back and forth calling from Mommy and Daddy - "Mommy, Do you know WHO just went potty in the big girl potty?" "No Daddy WHO went potty in the big girl potty?" Well you get the idea. She was "awarded" with our FULL attention and the expressively ridiculous potty dance that followed by my animated husband. (It really is a hoot - I have it on tape!)

You can start this by "Guess who just TRIED to go potty on the big girl potty?" Once she sees the results she might seek it more often.

Note - our son (just 3)is less interested in the potty dance - and way more motivated by sinking cheerios (when he hits them as he's going potty) And prefers to be "rewarded" with two or three mini M & M's. So each little child is made and motivated differently.

God's blessing and an extra measure of patience to you as you go through this.

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S.R.

answers from Dallas on

Hi Michelle...one little trick that worked with both my daughter and son: sometimes it's hard for the little ones to tell when it's time to head to the potty chair. We tell them what to do, when they think they need to go potty, when we should be telling them what it feels like to need to go to the potty. I told my kids that "when you get that little tickly feeling in your pee-pee" (or whatever word you use)that's when we should go to the potty. Once they know what the sensation of having to go to the potty 'feels like'...it's easier for them to associate that feeling with having to go to the potty. Hope that helps! Good Luck!

S.

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

Michelle,
I think "almost 2" is a little young to potty train. Don't rush her. Talk about it. Take her in the bathroom with you so that she gets the idea. Be positive with successes, but never chastise a mistake, and be patient.
She will definitely get there. My first born was 3 before we even started trying to potty train. He is a a healthy 22 year old now. So don't let other people make you feel like a failure if your little girl isn't ready.

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G.W.

answers from Tyler on

Now with little boys, you toss Gold Fish crackers or Cheerios/Fruit Loops in the pot and have the child aim. Little girls... um... maybe you could do the same thing ... sit on the pot and urinate on the cereals/crackers. Never know till you try.

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M.W.

answers from Dallas on

I vote for "wait." If she's showing resistance, she'd just not ready. It will be sooooo much easier & less stressful for both of you if you hold off until she's ready. We just put potties in our bathroom and let our girls try it out when they wanted. Both picked it up on their own, with no "training" at all, at different ages; one was nearly 3 1/2 and the other had just turned 2.

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

I would take her in with me first of all. Then turn the water on in the sink, that seems to help and then make a big big deal of it when she actually goes. That is what this grandmother has done.

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N.K.

answers from Dallas on

Sweat pants. It's extremely uncomfortable to wear wet sweat pants, and your floors don't get as many puddles. Call your friends and borrow every pair they have.

BTW, under 2 seems really young unless she's just ready. My girl was almost 3 when we trained (with sweatpants), and it was pretty easy (less than a week).

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L.H.

answers from Dallas on

Michelle,
I turn on the water faucet. I have had one mom actually pour warm water over them while sitting on the potty.
How old is she anyway? Are you sure she is ready? Does she keep her diaper dry for nap? Just some ideas!!
L.

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L.T.

answers from Lubbock on

Hi Michelle,

Is your little one waking up dry and able to tell you when she needs to go potty? If not she may not be ready. I know people say their kids were potty trained by two but that is not so true these days.

Hope you find the answer you are looking for. You know your daughter best.

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D.B.

answers from Dallas on

Hi Michelle,Have you tried running water in the lav? are pouring a cup of water over her pee pee area? It worked for my children when I was potty training.

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

Put pull ups on her and sit her on the potty however many times you want to i the day. If she goes...GREAT.........if she does not ..GREAT......... She will go when she is ready. Don't stress out about it, let it come naturally and you probably won't have many accidents. Don't push it or scold her. Give her a tiny prize when she does go and super lots of praises! Be patient.
Mom of 3 grandmother to 5.

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J.

answers from Dallas on

The same sort of thing happend with my son. When we discussed it with the doctor he told us that the message was getting to the brain that he had to go potty but the message wasn't getting back to where it needed to in order for him to release the muscles and go when he was on the potty. In essence, he needed more time for his brain to develop fully before he could master it. Hang in there! It can be an extremely frustrating time, just give her a little more time and then try again.

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I don't think she's ready yet and until she is this will be a frustrating and prolonged process for you both. SHe's not even 2 yet, right? What's the rush? I would give her opportunities to use the potty, but don't push the issue so early on. If you wait until she is showing the signs of readiness it will be an easy process. good luck

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