Hi y'all,
Please only respond if you support co-sleeping and understand the benefits and joys of it.
I am expecting my second child in a few weeks, but I don't know what to expect regarding bed-sharing with my toddler and newborn (although I have read up on it and understand the safety measures that need to be taken). We have plenty of space, my biggest concern is that since neither of them will be sleeping through the night that they will wake eachother up with their cries.
I had originally anticipated sleeping in a separate room from my husband and 2.5 year old for a bit in order to avoid having the baby wake up the toddler and vice versa (especially since the toddler doesn't consistently sleep through the night); however, our guest bed will be taken up with guests for the first couple of weeks. I thought perhaps I could have a back-up air mattress in another room - although I don't relish the idea. Perhaps we'll just wing it and everything will work out fine.
So, my question is for other co-sleepers - what are some of the things that you do/did to keep everyone sleeping as peacefully as possible? What are some outcomes that I can reasonably expect with young children of this age? We already have one sound machine and a back-up fan that can provide a good deal of white noise. All ideas are welcome. Thanks.
I sincerely appreciate your time in responding to my question; however, I think the title of my question may have been a bit confusing, so I am going to change it.
My concern is not about space (we have two large mattresses side by side), it is more about children waking each other in the night due to crying. I'm curious as to what I can reasonably expect - and ideas for how I can avoid this since our guest bed will be occupied for a couple of weeks post-birth.
Have you thought about transistioning the toddler to his/ her own bed? If this isn't idea for you maybe a co-sleeper bassinet right next to you? This way you have easy access to infant and can sooth him or her faster so not to wake others.
my vote: toddler in his bed, either in his room or in your room. Move out the dresser if you have to...
& the baby in a bassinet next to your bed.
No matter how much you read about safety & co-sleeping, I just would not risk my infant's life. I realize that this statement will offend many moms - Peace to all. This is simply MY opinion & does not need to be yours! :)
We had a California King and turned it on its side to give us more room. The baby slept next to me by the wall on a receiving blanket (for ease of clean-up), we put the bed on the floor and pushed it into a corner, and put tightly rolled blankets between the mattress and the wall to fill in the gap. The baby usually slept with his/her head near my neck/boobs, and there was no pillow above him/her. The toddler was on the other side of me, and my husband on the outside. We slept like that for YEARS and it was very comfortable. My husband took care of the toddler's night time needs and I took care of the baby. Diapers and blankets were kept nearby so I could reach them in the middle of the night. In the earliest days, right after birth, I put the baby in a bassinet next to the bed, but that usually didn't last more than a couple of weeks. Also, in the first month, my husband took care of changing the baby after I nursed him/her during the night, so I could go right back to sleep.
Do not sleep with the baby on an air mattress, that's very dangerous. If someone needs to sleep on that, it should be your husband.
Hi! I had a three year old when my baby was born (2.5 years ago) we all sleep in same bed...boys in the middle so they don't fall off :) at first it was a challenge because the baby would cry and wake up the toddler or the toddler would roll over and touch the baby and the baby would wake up. It wasn't long before they each got used to it and then they slept great. Now they sleep better together than apart and they are so cute when they are sleeping next to each other :)
We are in the exact same position. I don't know when you are due but hubby is working h*** o* transitioning toddler to his bed for most of the night before baby comes. Due to night attachment to mom we are nipping this in the bud now because nursing will be a nightmare. I give him EXTRA love and cuddles in the morning and throughout the day. We have a bassinet by the bed, and I'm considering pulling the old crib mattress into our room for toddler to sleep on when he comes into our room from his bed. Mostly, I think we are going to just see how it goes. We have lots of contingency plans worked out. DS sleeps in a twin bed and the "nursery" is set up as a guest room as well, so even if we have company there will be an extra bed for an adult. We will figure something out. As long as we know the things that we won't/cant do, we will just figure out what will work when baby gets here.
Good luck!!
My cosleeping toddler was 22 months when her brother was born, we have a king size bed and dad had toddler on his side, I had new baby on mine with a cosleeper (he didn't always use it but it was there as a buffer or extra place if I needed it) and we were in the middle. This worked for us...also I think the first couple of nights my older one slept with grandma in our guest bedroom. We all slept together for about 6 months then we moved the toddler (who was about 2 1/2) to a toddler bed beside ours while baby stayed in bed with us for another couple of months and then both kids moved out of our room and bed. My oldest didn't have any issues that I can remember...I would do it again so it must not have been that bad :)
I had my 3rd child when my middle child was 24 months. I slept with both of them. I put side rails on the bed and used a firm mattress. I always sleep very light when I have a newborn, so anytime my toddler or the baby would move I'd wake up. It worked fine for us. I didn't want to transition my 2 yr old to a toddler bed at that time b/c he was already feeling left out and adjusting to new baby. With both of them in my bed, I was able to get that good quality time with my 2 yr old while nursing my newborn.
We co-slept with our boys, and they are about 2 1/2 years apart as well. We began putting our older son in his own bed to begin the night. If he wakes in the middle of the night and joins as, he is welcome. It did happen occasionally, but many nights he just stayed put.
We also had our newborn sleep in his carseat for the first few months. This was actually because he had swallowing issues and there was a concern of reflux and he just slept very well in his carseat. It was very helpful, as the little one slept very well (and I could nurse him back to sleep, place him in his carseat and carry him anywhere!) and it gave our older son more time to adjust to both the baby and sleeping in his own bed ... at least to begin the night.
Congratulations on the new baby!!!
If you do an air mattress, that should be for your husband and toddler, NOT you and the newborn.
How about a palette on the floor for your toddler?
Just sounds so crowded to me. I would totally be a nervous wreck, about something happening.
hi,
We put the crib matress for the toddler next to our bed for when he wake up during the night and the baby in the playpen bassinet after nursing sessions.We had the baby on the floor first Moses basket style and quickly realized that it wasn't safe if the toddler was awake and we were asleep.My toddler went to bother the baby a few times and so in the playpen she went.And at one point our toddler was very obsessed with the new baby and constantly bother her and wake her up when he would wake up in the middle of the night.So we did borrow a playpen from a friend and had our baby and our toddler in one playpen each in our bedroom.This work really well for almost a year.And for us it also helps with transition as we just simply put the playpen in his bedroom at first before switching to a big boy bed (bunk bed that he share with his older brother right now).Our toddler is 3 years old now and still wakes up in the middle of the night sometimes ,so we just go and lay down with him and he falls back asleep pretty fast with like 5/10mn.
Hope this help.
N.
Congrats on #2. Co-sleeping with all those people in the bed gets challenging. Idea # 1 get a king bed- we somehow got through co-sleeping with an infant and toddler BUT a bigger bed would have been better. We had a small co-sleeper for the baby. I liked this at first because we did not know the infants habits- nor did I know how I would react to having them both in bed and having a co-sleeper (small bed level with and attached to ours) and not sure how the toddler would do. I think at around this time we also began transitioning the toddler to her own bed (in our room on the floor) and this gave us all lots of options in case it wasn't working out for us in the middle of the night. It all depends on how you sleep- if one of you is a toss-around kind of sleeper it can keep many people awake!
Good luck with this- perhaps the little bed (or a special sleeping bag) next to yours is the way to go with the toddler in the beginning. Starting it before the baby arrives might be even better so that the older one doesn't feel like they are being kicked out by the baby!
Good luck
I'm about to face the same thing. Most of the time my husband is out of town for work. When he's home we will try to get our toddler in her bed, but I'm about to have a baby in a week....we co sleep a lot. I'm planning on buying a co sleeper crib that is basically an extension of our bed to make things easier.
I think co sleeping is the best safest and easiest thing for sober healthy mothers and babies. I hope you find your right solution and represent the decision with the rest of us.
Best wishes
I'm not against co sleeping and I've had my kid in my bed many a night but I think 4 would be to much. For our baby's safety as she was jaundace at birth we kept her in a bassinett right next to our bed for the first few weeks till we got rid of the billy blanket pad and she there was no danger for her to be rolled on. After that if you take them in your bed its so hard to get them out so I would suggest you put a mattress in your room for the baby so there is plenty of room. Not an air matress baby will sufficate.
You could move your toddler to a mattress on the floor. Or you could use a co sleeper for your newborn. Or of course, you could do both and have more room to sleep. NOTHING would have woken my son at 2-1/2.
