B.M. asks from Bealeton, VA on August 21, 2010
How Old Should a Child Be When They Learn to Use Utensils?
My daughter is almost 15 months old and we were somewhere eating and someone asked me if she knew how to use a fork or spoon and I replied she kind of does she doesn't really know how very well.. But I can't even get her to eat in her high chair or even let me feed her with utensils anymore.. I don't know what happened but now all of a sudden she just wants me to feed her with my fingers it's been like this for 2 months.. she freaks out when I use them.. Help me I'm not sure if this is bad or not.
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R.J. answers from Seattle on August 21, 2010
My nanny insisted I use chopsticks from the time I started eating solids. My mum said it was HILARIOUS, because I would try and try to eat my asagohan in the morning and it would takes ages just one grain of rice at a time, then I'd get frustrated, grab a handful and shove it in, and then my nanny would patiently redirect me to go back to my chopsticks. (We're not japanese, but we lived in japan).
With my own son, I always provided silverware or chopsticks, but he used them sporadically. I think by 2ish he was using them MOST of the time. Like the PP, my kiddo *hated* being fed. I think I've fed him in total fewer than 5 times. He was always a very "do it myself" kind of child.
For soup, I'd just separate it. The solids would go on his tray or plate, and the liquid would go in a sippy cup.
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A.G. answers from Pocatello on August 21, 2010
I wouldn't worry too much about it....it's probably just a phase. My oldest never liked to us utensils when she was that age. I had to feed her myself all the time. I kinda liked it cause she never really got messing trying to do it herself. But around 2 or 2 1/2 she really got the hang of it and then was fine. Now she is 3 and 1/2 and eats by herself no problem. Now my second daughter hates to be fed and has been using her hands or utensils since about 13 months. So all kids are different. i would just maybe show her the utensils for every meal...like just leave the fork on the table but don't make her use it unless she wants to. Really she is still very young so don't stress.
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M.R. answers from Boca Raton on August 21, 2010
I had child-sized utensils out on the high cahir tray or the table when my kids were very young. By one year, both of my daughters knew what they were and the basic concept of how to use them. Mastery of all utensils just gradually came with age and fine motor skills as my kids grew and developed. Nevertheless....I always encouraged proper usage of utensils and always made it a point to be a good example myself on how to eat nicely and properly with them. My kids were never allowed to run around the house, the kitchen, or wherever, if they were eating. No way. In the highchair or at the table or your done and the food goes bye-bye. I am not fond of the pint-sized "Dine and Dash" theory. It is not only a huge bad habit that takes a long time to break, but walking around or running around and taking bites of food here and there is ridiculous. Kids have to eat and they will get hungry and they will feed themselves when they are ravished. I would put her at the table, in whatever seat you feel is good for her, give her her plate of food, and the utensils, and encourage her to eat with the spoon or fork and make a game out of it. Maybe "follow the leader" or "copy me" and you be the role model. Praise her big-time if she does the right things. If she tries to get down or won't eat the food without you, the meal is over and she has to leave the table. No snacks or goodies for her later, either. A few of these zero tolerance moves and a hungry tummy will teach her that you mean business and mealtimes are not going to be a struggle or a joke. Put the foot to the floor and just help her out by taking control. You can do this!!
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S.H. answers from Honolulu on August 21, 2010
each child is different.
Both my kids had different time lines for that. Its okay.
When a child shows curiosity and wants to try it, then they can.
Of course at the age of your child, they will not be 'expert' at it yet. This is normal. They will start off just acting like it is a toy... then fumble with it and poke around with it. ALL normal. They do not have the fine-motor skills for using it perfectly, yet. It is developmentally attained, over time and practice.
My son just made 4... and over time since he was 1 years old... he is NOW 'expert' at utensils and not clumsy with it anymore.
Next, MANY kids do NOT like eating in high chairs.
My kids HATED it.
So, I fed my kids with them just sitting on a regular chair at the table. OR, at the coffee table in the family room.
OR, on their child-sized table and child sized chair.
They like this MUCH better.. .and then, eating was not a battle and they ate. Happily.
Kids don't have to sit in high-chairs.
Many kids just hate it...then they won't eat. Or, will fight about it.
I've used my fingers too, for feeding my kids when young. MANY cultures do this. Utensils, are not always the only way.
Kids, will naturally start using Utensils.... naturally.
They won't eat like cave-men forever. It is a natural progression. And occurs in "stages."
all the best,
Susan
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A.C. answers from Cincinnati on August 21, 2010
hi~
Spoon use ranges from 14-24 months (typically is not precise, may still spill from spoon), uses a spoon well from 24-30 months. Fork use is between 2 ½ years to 3 ½ years. One of the developmental screening tools spoon use ranges from 12-15 months.
That being said it takes practice and making a mess in order to improve with this skill
If you want to encourage this skill think about the type of spoon she is using.
Characteristics of an Effective Spoon
• The bowl of the spoon is relatively flat so that food can be removed easily by the upper lip.
• The spoon does not shatter or break if the child bites down on it.
• The bowl fits the size of the child's mouth.
• Metal spoons are covered, coated, or have a plastic bowl for the child who is hypersensitive to temperature or taste or has a bite reflex.
• The length of the handle is appropriate to the size of the feeder's hand for dependent feeding and appropriate for the child's hand in independent feeding.
• The handle of the spoon is wide, thick, and short for the child who is developing self-feeding skills.
• The spoon can fit into an adaptive handle for holding assistance when necessary.
• The spoon is interesting to the child who is learning independent spoon-feeding. Color and design can attract and maintain the child's attention.
• The spoon is the appropriate weight for the child's independent feeding needs.
• The spoon has a pleasing texture for the child to hold.
hope that helps!
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S.D. answers from Indianapolis on August 21, 2010
My first son wanted to be fed for a long time. He did enjoy *trying* to feed himself oatmeal and yogurt around 15 months, but I think it wasn't fast enough for her, he wanted me to give him big bites quickly :P
My second son was more independent and started using the spoon around 12 or 13 months!!
They are all different.
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T.H. answers from Kansas City on August 21, 2010
Well me personally I would probably stop feeding her if I could only use my hands. She can feed herself with her hands, but you don't really need to do that. I'd say it was around this time my daughter became interested in utensils. By 2 she was proficient with them, but she wouldn't eat anything off a spoon (from my hand or hers) from 8 months to at least 15 months, so that's not strange it can just get frustrating! ;) I would say give them to her, but don't stress if she doesn't use them. As far as the high chair, I think it was closer to 18 months that my daughter started resisting it. Have you tried removing the tray and just pushing the high chair up to the table? We did that for months and put her plate right at the table like us and it was fine. At about 21 months I got her a booster chair and it was a waste of money...she just wanted to sit in the adult chair! Of course! I'd say go by her cues. She may be a bit young to be in a regular chair, but let her try it for snack times and see what happens! If she can do it you might as well let her and make your life easier!
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M.M. answers from Washington DC on August 21, 2010
I can assure you at 18 she will eat with a fork at her senior prom.
Until then all you can do is help her, show her and be patient.
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A.G. answers from Pocatello on August 21, 2010
I wouldn't worry too much about it....it's probably just a phase. My oldest never liked to us utensils when she was that age. I had to feed her myself all the time. I kinda liked it cause she never really got messing trying to do it herself. But around 2 or 2 1/2 she really got the hang of it and then was fine. Now she is 3 and 1/2 and eats by herself no problem. Now my second daughter hates to be fed and has been using her hands or utensils since about 13 months. So all kids are different. i would just maybe show her the utensils for every meal...like just leave the fork on the table but don't make her use it unless she wants to. Really she is still very young so don't stress.
1 mom found this helpful
R.J. answers from Seattle on August 21, 2010
My nanny insisted I use chopsticks from the time I started eating solids. My mum said it was HILARIOUS, because I would try and try to eat my asagohan in the morning and it would takes ages just one grain of rice at a time, then I'd get frustrated, grab a handful and shove it in, and then my nanny would patiently redirect me to go back to my chopsticks. (We're not japanese, but we lived in japan).
With my own son, I always provided silverware or chopsticks, but he used them sporadically. I think by 2ish he was using them MOST of the time. Like the PP, my kiddo *hated* being fed. I think I've fed him in total fewer than 5 times. He was always a very "do it myself" kind of child.
For soup, I'd just separate it. The solids would go on his tray or plate, and the liquid would go in a sippy cup.
1 mom found this helpful
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