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How Do You Help Your Child with Homework?

I have a son who is in the 4th grade and I recently had a conference with his teacher because she said his homework grades does not reflect his school work grades. I told her I look over my sons work for an example:math and if the answer is not correct and I know it s something he know but because of his learning disability dyslexic or his mental issues, ADD, anxiety I make him erase and redo them and if does not understand I tech him on what he doesn't understand. Well his teacher doesn't want me to re correct or to look over his school work no more! That just made me very upset. She told me that he she is not able to see what he needs help on because I help him at home. Last semester is the 1st semester he got A/B honor roll and I know it was not because of his homework grades! She tried to tell him when she asked him to do the work he cant do it for her I said, that was not the case when I set with him one on one'' I told her he would do 100% better if he was in a smaller classroom but of course public schools in TX has 22-23 kids in one classroom to one teacher. Also a FYI the teacher was on maternity leave and just came back after the New Year break he was never at risk for failing the TASK test and classes until she came back. I am not sure at this point what to do or what to think. Any ideas would help.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

The thing is she TOLD me she was going to send more work sheet for us to do like a packet for practice has she done it NO and it's been a week and 1/2! Also she said she was going to put my son at his own table as she done it NO! So I just think sh is the problem and secondly my son is just getting nervous about the TASK test since it's coming up in April and they are drilling the kids with it uyou don't pass you dont go to the next grade!!

More Answers

FIGHT for the rights of your child!

Schools get funding from the State for special education. If your child has "tested" to be Dyslexic they MUST provide a special instructor for him. Do Not stop at the teacher... next step is counselor, then Principal, School Board, even try your District PTA. Whatever you do, DO NOT give up.

As for helping with homework... YOU are doing it right. I always check over my children's homework and make them re-do things that were not correct. The purpose of Homework is to reinforce what is taught int he classroom. If the teacher is NOT teaching in the classroom then THAT is not YOUR fault. She needs to step up!

D.
Mother of three: 20, 19, and 6

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Hi V.,
I have always supervised my son's homework. It allows me to see where he is struggling and ask the teacher for additional help for him. We are in CA where 30+ kids and 1 teacher, no aides, is pretty standard. So I want to make sure he's not slipping through the cracks. Occasionally, in my zeal I will actually do the work for him, rather than letting him puzzle it out on his own. It sounds like the teacher is trying to make sure this isn't happening with your son. I will bet your son is performing better at home, because he has your one on one attention and he's comfortable asking you for help. Try not to take the teacher's request personally (I know it would be hard for me) and do it "her way" for a couple weeks and see what the results are, then consult with her again. I have found that supervising my son's homework has helped me to get a better grip on the crappy curriculum and text books that are being used. It took me about 45 minutes to figure out the "Avocado Salad Recipe" problem last night. I'm a mathematically inclined adult and it took me 45 minutes to figure out how to get the answer and explain it to my kid (5th grade). LOL!!! But disturbing none the less..
Good luck,
S.

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My daughter's teacher asked us to correct the homework and when our child has to correct an answer, we have them write it again with a colored pencil. That way they learn how to do it right, but she can see what they're having trouble with.

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For the life of me, how do average kids get enough one on one tutorial in the public schools ANYWAY? Sure, public schools are fine if you have a math brain. You can keep on top of it.. But if you don't,...
Let's say you backed off and didn't help your child. That means your teacher is going to have to spend a good majorty of her classroom time helping your son, one on one. Just how is she going to do that? Is she going to slow the rest of the class down so your son can keep pace? Is she going to be available at 8pm for telephone tutorials?

I understand her need, but there has got to be a better way than to restrict home help to the student. Fustration of leaving a child to flounder never helps a child in math.

How about if you Zerox his homework before you correct /help him- that way she can see what he was having issues with. (circle the originals that were incorrect in red pen) and staple it to the back of his corrected homework sheet.

REPITITION is the key for my daughter. She needs more repetition to let concepts sink in. She will have to do three to five times as much repetition as my math brained son. Maybe the teacher can send extra sheets of problems home that you can practice with you son together if she thinks there is a problem.

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I know this is difficult for you. We are so used to wanting our kids to be on the honor roll. Why don't you try the way the teacher asks? How do you expect the teacher to know what he is struggling with if she cannot see it?

When our daughter started having homework, we were told to give them 20 minutes to work on the homework and then have the child stop.. Even if it was not finished. This gave the teacher a true look at how much the child could do in that time. They were graded on the amount of work they did and then the teacher could better judge where the child was.

This continued all the way through 5th grade. The kids were told it should take them so many minutes to finish their homework. If they could not complete it in that time. They could continue to finish it and note the amount of time it really took, or they could stop.. It was amazing how the kids got better and better at completing their homework on time, especially when everyone else could do it.

I like the suggestion of looking over the paper and if you see a mistake, write the problem on a separate paper and WATCH how he works the problem a second time without your assistance.. Then you can assist him, but do not do the work for him. Let the teacher try it her way and see how it goes. This is the hard part of parenting. Sometimes our kids need to struggle and then over come to make them stronger and independent.. Remember, these grades are a guide. They are not a reflection on anything else.

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Does your son have an IEP? That should spell out the specifics for the kind of help he needs during the school day. If it's determined that he does need a one-on-one situation (it would be nice if all children could have that), the school is required to provide it. If test anxiety is an issue, they have to address that as well. (Maybe pull-out testing (having him take tests in another room) or extra time.)

Lots of great ideas from other moms. Sounds like you and his teacher are at a stand-still. Should she thank you for being a concerned parent who's trying to help her child? Of course. But then, maybe it will help to remember she has a newborn at home and is having to get herself readjusted to the classroom and to the demands of having them ready for the TASK test........not an excuse for blowing you off, but maybe you can approach her as a "team member" - "How can we work together to support my son?"

Good luck and hang in there.

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with a newborn myself, I don't have time to read your other responses, sorry if I suggest what others are suggesting. Continue helping your son, but do not change his answers, instead redo the problem on another piece of paper and attach it to his work. Also remind the teacher gently that you are waiting for the things she said she would provide. With a new baby she has simply likely forgotten to get that together. Teaching is time consumming and it would be easy to overlook details when she is likley so tired.

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First of all quizzes and tests are for evaluation not homework. The grading is usually weighted differently for different types of work. Also, if your son has been diagnosised with dyslexia he would be able to get the dyslexia bundle accomodations on the TAKS test. He should also be able to go to content mastery for tests (extra time) or completing assignments (extra help, time, less distractions) if he needs it. It sounds like your son does not need to be in resource which would be a smaller classrrom but the curriculum would be different (he would still have to take the TAKS test). If things don't get better I would have a conference with the principal.

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