How Do We Get Our 2 1/2 Year Old Son to Stop Drinking Milk Out of a Bottle?

Updated on August 17, 2008
J.Z. asks from Seattle, WA
53 answers

Hi. I have an almost 2 1/2 year old son who is the light of our life, is super smart and very active. The trouble is this - how do we get him to give up the bottle at home? And is it really THAT big a deal that he still takes a bottle?

He has no problem using a sippy cup for water or juice at home, and he uses a sippy cup at daycare for water, juice and milk. He will even use a child's cup with a straw at a restaurant. But at home, he will NOT drink milk out of anything but a bottle. I'll admit that we haven't tried the "cold turkey" method and just simply taken it away from him, mostly because it is easier (on us) to keep the peace. I think it is simply a habit and maybe even a "comfort" thing for him. He is also a pacifier user which we are working hard to give up also. He has gotten good about leaving the binky at home or in the car when he goes to daycare, but still needs it at night and occasionally on the weekends at home.

I'm not looking for criticism on why he should NOT be drinking out of a bottle at his age. I'm simply looking for any ideas or things that have worked for other moms in a similar situation. I welcome any and all ideas or advice! Thanks!

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So What Happened?

I just wanted to thank you ALL so very much for your advice! Never in a million years did I think I would get quite so many responses. It's just great to know that we aren't the ONLY parents who are struggling with this issue. We love all the ideas and have considered having him help us box up the bottles for "other babies who need them" and rewarding him with a prize from the "Bottle Fairy." Although we basically did try the cold turkey method and so far he has gone almost a week without a bottle, with surprisingly few tantrums. As some of you said, we are surprised at how well he has adjusted. So far so good! We have decided to table the giving up the binky issue until after he has gone a few months without using a bottle. I simply can't bear to take away ALL of his "comfort" things at the same time.

On a side note, we have rarely (if ever) let our son go to bed with a bottle. He is really good about drinking his milk before bed and our bedtime routine has always gone pretty smoothly. He has no problem getting to sleep and doesn't need the bottle to help him sleep. He just simply is an avid milk drinker!

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M.D.

answers from Seattle on

I don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet, but for the binki you can cut off the tip. This makes it feel weird in their mouth and tell him the binki is broken and you have to throw it away. That is what my sister had to do with one of her kids.

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B.M.

answers from Seattle on

Really very simple. I got my grandson off of a bottle at 20 months by putting it away and not giving it to him. If he wanted something to drink I gave him a cup. When he takes a nap he goes to sleep without a bottle. Sometimes he will take a binky but most of the time he was spitting it out so I quit giving that to him to.

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M.G.

answers from Seattle on

The bottle is not a big deal... still wont be for a while. Eventually he'll have friends and notice that they don't do it so he'll just give it up.
Another advice is just get rid of the sippy cup. Go strait for the regular cup and cut out the middle man. The sippy cup tells him he's a bigger guy... but not quite big enough. make him feel like a "big boy"

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L.M.

answers from Seattle on

Hi,
I have two children ages 5.5years and 2.5 years old. I had a struggle with my first child and we did not give up the bottle until she was almost 3!! The first thing the dentist asked me at her 3 year old dentist apt. was she on the bottle. The dentist said it will affect her teeth and bite pattern and he could tell she was still on the bottle. I finally had to give it up cold turkey b/c the doctor told me the longer I wait the harder it will be and when we do go cold turkey be prepared for a week of heck.. It was so hard that one week but we gathered up all the bottles and took them out of the house that way I would not cave in. Also we had my daughter help gather all the bottles and took them to her daycare provider. The day care provider prasied her and was so proud and explained what a big girl she was. Later that night we had the bottle fairy come and leave something under her pillow at the time she would of had her normal bottle.The doctor was right after the hard week.. she never asked for another bottle. I am so glad we finally gave it up since at the time we had baby # 2 on the way. For my daughter it was a comfort item.
Best of luck :)
Lenc

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J.F.

answers from Portland on

"And is it really THAT big a deal that he still takes a bottle?"
Personally, I don't think so. He's only doing it a couple of times a day, and if that is his comfort, follow your heart on how you feel about it. I know I used a bottle until I was around 4 years old, and I neither have cavities or any need for braces.
Perhaps talking to a highly recommended dentist (if that were a concern) would be beneficial. Dr. Allan Pike in SW Portland is very supportive of children and there attachments, understanding that some things are not worth changing in exchange for trauma, and he is also conservative about his treatments. It's a really great office. But that may be for the future...
For now I want to offer that if you feel comfortable with your son drinking from a bottle at home occasionally, then that is what's important. The worldwide age for weaning from the breast is (get ready...) between 2 1/2 and 7 years. This is what he does instead of nursing, ya know?

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S.L.

answers from Portland on

Try talking to him about when he thinks he'll be ready to give up the bottle. Maybe you can agree that when he turns 3, he's a big boy and only drinks out of cups. This way he has time to prepare. IMO it isn't THAT big of a deal (considering my daughter nursed until she was almost 3) but it's nice to have a plan for the transition. Having that suckable thing for comfort IS still important for many kids at his age. And, of course, always use your mommy intuition. You know your son better than anyone else!

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B.P.

answers from Seattle on

I think it is just habit that she is used to milk in a bottle, so like any other habit it is hard to break. Maybe if you can get him to help you put all of his bottles in a box for his new baby, now that he is a big boy, he will feel like there is more of a purpose to giving it up. If he is still using it when the baby comes, he may steal it away from that one and you won't know who's getting the milk.

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M.S.

answers from Seattle on

It sounds like you've received some great responses so far. The only bit I can add is that it may just take some time for your little guy to give up his bottle. Don't worry, he will eventually give it up. As my mom once told me, each phase in childhood will eventually pass, and kids will move on to something else!

As a side note, it's really important that he not go to bed with milk in his bottle. The milk will stay on his teeth, and actually rot his teeth (I've seen some awful pictures of children's teeth when parents have done this), but I'm sure you're being careful!

Good for you for being such a wonderful and caring mom!

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L.G.

answers from Eugene on

Cold turkey works well. He will be over it in a week, at the longest. We did that with the pacifier as well. You said it well, that you give in to keep the peace. The peace will return rapidly once he realizes there is nothing he can do that will manipulate you into giving him the bottle back. Children his age don't need milk, so gong without for a few days will be fine.

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J.S.

answers from Eugene on

When we felt it was time to wean our daughter from the bottle, we told her that she was a big girl and that all the new babies need her bottles (it helps if you know someone who has a baby). We then told her we are going to through her a big girl party! She got to pick out her cake, she got a present and lots of new sippy cups. Then she put all of her bottles in a pretty bag to give to the new babies. After that she never asked for a bottle again.

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K.G.

answers from Portland on

The magic word you want here is "broken". Every day or two, take one of the bottles and have something happen to it. Oops, it got stepped on...or oops, the lids won't screw on tightly, whatever it takes. Just over a couple of weeks, "break" them, and don't replace them. "Sorry honey...this one is broken...but here's a cup with a cool bendy straw!"
And a trick that worked with us too was to find cool cups with their names on it...for a while, they wanted those cups during every meal.

Good Luck!

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T.P.

answers from Portland on

I don't have much new to add, but wanted to let you know that it's completely normal to worry about your baby having bad habits. When my newborn took to a binky like it was the best thing ever, I worried if she would be using it on her way to pre-school... She gave it up herself at around 4m old, just started falling asleep without it. Then she started sucking her thumb...great, now she'll be a thumbsucker until she's in high school..lol. Nope, she barely sucks her thumb now at 11m, only when she is soothing herself to sleep. I almost never see her do it, I just hear the sucking sound from her room. Now she has a "lovey" she falls asleep with but it's only for "night night" so if she takes it to college with her, so what. As for her bottle, well...she drinks from a sippy everywhere but at nap and bedtime. I never put the bottle in bed with her, it's just our snuggle/lap time (she actually rarely holds it herself so it's easy to keep her from having it unless she is actively drinking). If she doesn't finish it I just take it out of the room with me. I even use a sippy if she wakes in the middle of the night to give her a drink of water before putting her back in bed and she seems fine with that. My feeling is that I was unable to breastfeed so that bottle is our intimate snuggle time (as if she were BF) and I'm in no hurry to give it up. She only gets 2 bottles a day now, nap and bedtime, and her history is to give things up as she is ready. I'll follow her cues on it, and if she is still attached to the bottle at 3yrs we'll have a visit from the bottle fairy. Bottom line is to make your decision, then stick to your guns...little kids eat inconsitancy up like chocolate cake! Good Luck!

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L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Hi J. - My son was also on a bottle and nursing until he was about two. I knew deep down inside that I had to take it away from him and I was SURE it was going to be a big pain in the as$ taking it away from him....HA was I wrong. We just told him that he was not going to have any more "mila's" (mamila in spanish) and that we had to throw away all the bottles. He helped me gather them all (so I wouldn't have a chance to give them back if I had to) and threw them all in the trash himself. He was fine, asked for it once or twice, and then left it at that. Sometimes our kids will surprise us. I liked the "bottle fairy" idea, and would try that with the binky's too! The little girl I nanny was TOTALLY a binky baby, but not with me. I just told her "binkey blech!" and never gave it to her, but with her mama, she always got it. SO when she took her to the dentist, and the dentist showed her how her teeth were starting to go in the wrong direction, mama decided to take it away. THey had a friend with a younger baby (baby belby...baby shelby) who they went and saw, and she got to give all her binky's to the baby! It didn't even faze her, and I thought for sure it would! Yet another example of kids amazing us.
YOur son will be fine, I would stop cold turkey but let him be a helper in where his beloved bottle and binky go! GOod luck, L.

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A.R.

answers from Portland on

As far as the bottle, if he is willing to take the sippy cup other places then I'd just keep offering milk at home in it. My daughter didn't want to take milk out of them at first either, but my advice would be to cut it off cold turkey. That's what we did and the first few days are rough, but it gets better. I'd do it over a weekend when you don't have to get up early for work or your spouse is home to help. With the pacifier...we are breaking our one year old right now and already broke our 2 yr old at one. For us we started by saying only at nap time and bed time. Now we are slowing cutting that off. So my 1 year old goes down without it and I set a timer for 10 minutes. Usually she cries the whole time which really wears her out. Then I go in and offer it to her. The next nap time I extend it out to 15 minutes and so on. Eventually they give up and go to sleep without it. After doing this for a few days it worked for us. It's not easy on the parent you just have to tough it out too! Good luck hope that helps.

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B.L.

answers from Jacksonville on

He doesn't have to have milk to survive. We gave milk in sippy cups and water in bottles to wean ours off the bottle. Our culture is dependent on milk, but it's not necessary. You could dilute the milk in the bottle slowly until it's unappetizing, while offering whole milk in the sippy cup.

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M.B.

answers from Seattle on

J.,

I think you've given yourself the answer you are looking for: cold turkey. He is old enough not to need a bottle for any reason. I would have him help you round up all the bottles, put them in a box, and send them off to some new baby that needs them more than he does. In the morning he could check the mail box with you and "find" a new toy or some such for being such a big boy and giving up his bottles. Yes, it's a variation of Super Nanny's Binky-fairy technique, but it works wonders. You could possibly send the binky's at the same time.

Both my kids had their binky's taken and thrown away the night before their first birthday. Neither my hubby nor I wanted to have a 3 year old trying to talk around the plug in their mouth. It was hard for all of us for about 3 days, a week at most then the kids got used to life without the plug. My son was more attached to the binky than my daughter, but it was still hard. It was a convenience thing for us parents. We're out grocery shopping and the baby starts crying: insert plug and the crying stops (until they spit it out).

At 2 1/2 it's not going to be easy separating him from his bottle or binky, but it is possible and well worth the effort.

Supportively,
Melissa

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H.C.

answers from Portland on

Have you thought about possibly giving the bottles away to an infant you know and explain to son that he is becoming a big boy and little babies need the bottles for their food? If that works with bottle can then try with the pacifiers. I have heard friends say that method works because the child is involved with packing them up and it makes it more like their decision, will be tough for a few days or a week after bottles are gone since it is a lifetime habit for him. There are also in stores this topper thing you can put on water bottles if you want to try that instead of going cold turkey, sort of transition into him using a water bottle for milk instead of baby bottle.... Good luck

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

Hiya,
Avent makes converters for their bottles which turns them into sippy cups. You may try giving him an avent bottle, then popping in the sippy cup attachment. With this brand it was easy to switch our son from bottle to tippy cup.
I also love the "it's broken" advice. That may work too.
Good luck

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J.B.

answers from Portland on

If I was just answering your header question without reading the body of your request, my answer would be: "Don't give him one." After reading the full body of your request, my answer is the same. I think our anticipation of their reaction and their reaction are often times not the same...but at some point we can become so trained to expect the emotional worst from them that we do anything to keep the peace. The thing is, and I learned this from experience, we are teaching our kids how to control us and those in authority over them. They are taking power and learning manipulation. The best advice I got from a friend was: add 10 years to any behavior. So consider that...in ten years are you going to do something to keep the peace with your son even though you know it is best not to do it? Is he going to be telling you what to do and you will just do it? If your answer is no, the best thing you can do for him now is to start teaching him his role in the family. Asking those questions of myself and about my son's behavior really helped me identify areas where I needed to improve as the parent, authoritative figure and MOTHER. It was hard taking control back from my son...but it is so nice now. And frankly, he is happier just being a kid and trusting that I know what is right and best. When he tries to negotiate or manipulate now it is short lived and the moments are teachable and rich. So I encourage you to take back your role as parent and decision maker for your son.

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B.B.

answers from Portland on

Hi there! I'm probably a minority in my opinions but I thought I'd share anyway :)
I'm big on "why take away comfort items?" - really.....a bottle isn't hurting his health as long as you don't let him go to bed with it, and quite honestly, a bottle nipple and pacifier nipple are both pliable enough that they really don't hurt the positioning of teeth (that happens if the suction is too hard, and if that's the case he could move his teeth just by sucking on his tongue!)
If your son can keep his comfort items at home or in the car, then what is the harm? That's always what I ask myself, is the harm it causes great enough to take away the comfort it gives??? And how would we feel if somebody took away our nightly ice cream before bed, or frapaccino on sunday morning just 'cuz they had power over us?? I know kids need rules and boundries but I also try to think about them as 'people' instead of 'kids' and take into account how hard it must be to not get to make your own choices. I try and tell my husband; do you have a real reason why he has to stop doing (whatever it is) or are you just making him 'cuz YOU don't WANT him to do it??
Good luck. I know I sound "out there" compared to the other responses you will get..... :)

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K.M.

answers from Seattle on

Could you try just telling him the bottle are all gone and show him two containers that he can choose from to drink his milk in? This way maybe the impowerment of choice distracts him from not having the bottle. You could have him choose from a nubi sippy cup or a straw cup. The Nubi's are rubbery like a bottle and straws are always fun for kids. Maybe getting cups you would know he would really like with certain characters on it?

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D.C.

answers from Portland on

Hey there J.,

I just want to say that I am in a similar boat. I have 2 2 1/2yr old twin boys that I can not break the habit of using a bottle at night. I have done it for nap time though. They way I broke the nap time routine at home was by asking how the daycare does it. They only attend daycare twice a week so I thought if they can do it then I should be able to. They just told me that after they eat lunch they then wash hands and then they just automatically go lay down on their mats for nap time. So I immediately incorporated that at home and it worked for a day or two. Then my one son started asking for a bottle again, I really tried not to give in but just saying "no" wasn't working. So I offered him some water and he agreed. Then about a week later I just started giving him a sippy cup of water in his crib. That has seemed to work for us. We are still having trouble at night especially because our boys have yet to sleep through the night and a bottle is the only thing that soothes them.

So I just wanted to say that I understand what you are going through. I am interested in reading your comments because when I posed the same question all I got was critizism. So good luck and I would ask what the daycare does, thats what helped me.

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T.C.

answers from Portland on

J.,

I used "cold turkey" with my boys (twins). Both for the bottle and the pacifier. That was the only way I could reason it out for myself...and seemed less teasing to me than trying to wean.

Each child is an individual. Have you talked with your son to see what he says about drinking out of a cup at home? Or the pacifier usage? That may be a start to help him and you understand more.

Good luck,
T.

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D.R.

answers from Portland on

You could try taking him to the store (Babies R Us) and let him pick out a 'big boy' cup. I did this with my two youngest and it worked. We made a big deal about it.
My son gave up the bottle at 12 months with no problem.
D.

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T.F.

answers from Eugene on

I fed my son with a bottle until just a little after he turned two - but I gave him "Goolosh" bottles.....milk with rice or oatmeal and baby food of some sort (fruit, veggie, or a meal) - that is what he ate. yes, we did the other finger foods, but I didn't really want to sit there and spend the time to hand feed him....I just don't have the time and patience.

Anyway for your question - I bought these sippy cups made by Nuby and they have a soft mouthpiece - they cost about $1 or $2 a piece at Wal-Mart. I think it was a great transistion from the bottle to the sippy cup. Then we would graduate to the other cups.

I was also thinking it could be a security thing for him too. Maybe try the same thing you did with the pacifier - he is only allowed to have it at certain times of the day or night and only certain places.....so, wean him off the bottle - one less bottle a day during a few days or week period, then lessen it one more....until you have him throw his bottle away in the garbage....a way of having him say goodbye to baby bottles. He obviously understands about the pacifier - maybe he will understand the bottle. Good luck - You will get through this bump in the road.

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B.B.

answers from Portland on

I just wanted to add a little encouragement in the area of keeping peace. If you give in to him to keep the peace you are setting yourself up for BIG problems later on down the road. You will actually be keeping peace in your household by choosing what you think is best and enforcing whatever you decide. If you give in now, it will show him how to manipulate you in the future. Dealing with a day or two of rough waters with this bottle thing is a short time compared to the problems you may deal with later on if giving in becomes the norm.

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A.M.

answers from Eugene on

Hi--
I havent read any other postings yet, but I will tell you I was afraid I was never going to get my daughter off the bottle either--it was totally a comfort thing, usually only at night before bed, and I respected that and it didnt really bother me that she was still taking one, it was just that I couldnt foresee her ever giving it up (she was about 22 months)! My reason for wanting her to not rely on it anymore was that we were going to be traveling to Central America and I didnt want to find myself in the prediciment of having to get to a store to find her milk in a country that I didnt know the standards of quality on their dairy, not knowing if I would have a fridge, etc. so that kind of freaked me out. Anyway, I would say that since you dont have any timeline to stop it, start slowly and casually without too much pressure...one day just for kicks I told my daughter that she didnt need her bottle anymore because it was something that babies used and we should get rid of them, and she asked ME if SHE could throw her bottle away! Um, sure...go ahead! And she did! Of course, it wasnt that easy, later that night she wanted one, and I succumbed. But gradually when she asked for one, we would say "no bottle tonight" and she would whine a bit, but we just distracted her and she soon sort of forgot about it...not immediate, but she went from asking for it out of habit to no longer asking every night...we would give one to her if she really put up a stink, but that started happening only once or twice a week for just a couple of weeks. After that, no more. The funny thing is, ever since she stopped taking the bottle, she will not touch regular dairy milk! My other suggestion would be to maybe try putting a little bit of chocolate in the milk to not only change the taste, but to make it look different--if he will drink anything else in sippy cups or with straws, maybe he will drink the milk if it is slightly "altered"...but I wouldnt worry about the issue too much either, just go slow and be compassionate as I am sure you are, and good luck!

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A.C.

answers from Eugene on

I hate to say it but the cold turkey method is the best. We did it with our son. We simply threw all our bottles out so that way there would be no temptation to give in, but it only took him a couple of days to realize that he wasnt going to get his bottle and started drinking from his sippy cup

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J.R.

answers from Seattle on

I think that you have to go cold turkey - the trauma might last for 2 days, then he will be done...or don't offer him milk in a bottle at home. Give him a choice of water in a bottle or milk in a sippy cup. My son is just over 2.5, we just transitioned him to mainly drinking milk only at meals. If he is thirsty at other times, I ask if he wants water, usually he will say "yes". If he really wants milk, I will give it to him, but he has to drink it at the table or in the kitchen. When we did drop the bottle at a year (or just over) we did the cold turkey - he didn't drink any milk for about a day and then was fine. Like you said, he knows how to drink it out of a sippy cup...Also, maybe get a special milk cup for home (maybe even something without a lid for the table).

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S.D.

answers from Seattle on

I'm with you. I don't think it's really that horrible to let your son have his milk in a bottle at home. I have vivid memories of ASKING in complete sentences for chocolate milk in a bottle and getting it =). I have never had a cavity in my life -- if that helps any. My son was like this, too. Anywhere but home he would drink anything out of a cup, but at home he wanted his milk in a bottle, but only at naptime and bedtime. So, like you, I think it was a comfort thing. Now, we DID go cold turkey, but that wasn't planned. We had moved and on our fisrt night in the new house, I had forgotten his bottle at the old house. I told him how sorry I was, but that I simply didn't have a bottle in the house. If you wanted to try this, you really could scoop up all your bottles and move them to say, the garage, so that there really ISN'T a bottle in sight of your precious boy. Since that night, he's taken a sippy cup. You MIGHT even have an easier time since your son is a pacifier user (I"m assuming at bed time, mostly?) and that might offer him some additional comfort when he needs it to nod off. Also, because I know people will get on your case about that, too, as if it's any of their business to make you feel anything at all, I sucked my thumb until I was nearly 10 and never needed braces...I think some things are just that way.

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L.P.

answers from Seattle on

Hi J.,
I honestly don't think it's that big of a deal. It sounds like your son is slowly letting go on his own. The biggest issue you will have to deal with is the social stigma of your son using a bottle. If you don't care, then let it go. Eventually he will too. Our daughter used a bottle at night for a long time, probably until she was about 2 1/2. Eventually, she just stopped. My only caution is to not allow him to speak around the bottle or pacifier. He could develop issues with his speech. If he does try to speak you can just tell him you couldn't understand what he said and ask him to remove the bottle or pacifier and say it again. Good luck to you!!
L.

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C.L.

answers from Seattle on

My best advice is to do the "cold turkey" method. You're the parent and you know what is best for your child. Trust me, we struggled with the pacifier issue at 2-2-1/2 and it was hard, but it was not an issue once he realized that it was no longer around and you just don't talk about it much either because the more you do, the more they want it. Kinda' the out of sight, out of mind concept! Best of luck to you!

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T.O.

answers from Portland on

I was in your same situation when my daughter was 20 mos. old. I didn't think it was a big deal that she was drinking a bottle, yet everyone else seemed to have some commentary on it. It was just a lot easier to get her back to sleep and keep her content letting her have her bottle. The problem was she would get her sheets and herself wet in the process. So we finally did the "cold turkey" way. I was only able to do due that when a friend who has 4 boys said "There is no weening at this age." I would say when you are comfortable, just to try the cold turkey method. My daughter now doesn't want to drink milk at all, so giving up the bottle has given us another issue. If your son is drinking milk out of a cup, keep encouraging it! I know it is hard thinking you are taking away their comfort, but they bounce back :)

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A.M.

answers from Portland on

My daughter went through the transition by using those Playtex sippy cups with the built in straw. I even left one at daycare for her. Good luck.

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D.B.

answers from Richland on

I was SO worried about taking away the bottle and binki from my son, now 2 1/2. I did the bottle at 18 months and the binki just after he turned 2. He would not even drink from a sippy cup, bottle only. So one day I just removed them all from the cupboards so he could not even see them and gave him the sippy with milk. He cried some, but I told him and showed him we no longer had any bottles that they all went to a new baby that needed them! :) He was not to keen on it for about 30 mins and then decided he was thirsty enough and drank it! I was DREADING taking the binki away, he was VERY attatched! He loves to watch Jon and Kate plus 8, so I turned out the episode where the sextuplets give their binkis to their cousin, who was a baby! So we got out a ziplock baggie and gave each binki one last suck and then he placed each one in the bag and we gave them to his baby cousin. This provided closuer for him and once again got everyone out of the house immediately so there was no reverting! Hope this helps and good luck!

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R.S.

answers from Seattle on

I'm sure it's just a habit for your son. I had a friend who wanted to stop her son using a pacifier, so she had the pacifier "fairy" come and take it away and he got a prize in return. What about a really cool new cup that is only used for milk? The Thermos Foogo straw cups now come in some fun designs (camo, Cars, Spiderman) and you can find them at Target in the lunchbox section...

She said the first few days were awful with lots of tears, but she stuck by her guns and he was over it in a few days. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Seattle on

Hi Jo Anne,

We did the transition method where for a couple nights we would do bottle, then sippy cup, and now nothing as she is almost 3. The thing I found out yesterday is that chewing on bottles, pacifiers or other things can change their dental development. I was not extremely aware of that with our daughter, but they said she is doing great. I did this with her when she was abt 13 months with the bottle. She just gave it up easily. :)

Many Blessings,

K.S.

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D.Z.

answers from Seattle on

I don't have much advice but I was in the same situation with my daughter. When we took away the bottle she stopped drinking milk completely. And she drank a lot of milk from the bottle. She too had a binky. I think it is a comfort thing especially since he is drinking milk from a cup in other circumstances. If you do take the bottle away, don't give it back just to get him to drink his milk. Then he wins the battle. My daughter drinks a lot of water and at 5 still doesn't drink much milk unless we force it down her. The binky went away after the dog got a hold of it and chewed the end off. It helped that she only had one binky to use so it had to stay in her bed for naps. We never had multiple binky's in the house for either of my kids. Sorry I don't have much advice but you aren't alone in this one!

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S.C.

answers from Portland on

I may get a lot of criticism for this, but what worked for me and was virtually "painless" to break my daughter from the bottle at home was to give her chocolate milk in a sippy cup. (I used Ovaltine.) I told her that if she used a sippy cup, she could have chocolate milk. The next cup had to be regular milk, and I'd alternate. She dropped the bottle in one day and it took no crying or tantrums on either of our parts. lol

(With my next 2 kids, I went straight to sippy cup with no bottle in between, and that worked for me also.)

Good luck!
S.

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L.H.

answers from Spokane on

It's time to do the cold turkey. I did that with my son at 18 months and he said bye bye to the bottles and never asked about them again. He knows that he can control you and he will get his way. He is way to old to still get a bottle. I wish you luck. L. H.

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R.R.

answers from Seattle on

I have read all the other replys as I didn't want to repeat things again for you. But one thing we did with our son at first when we took his bottle away, we got a sippy cup, making sure it didn't leak, and put it in his crib with him at night. When we put him down we showed him his cup , right up where he could reach it if he needed a drink because we had no more bottles. It worked. At night if he woke up and needed a drink of milk, it was right there waiting for him, in about a week it was no longer needed.
Oh, I almost forgot, we had taken him to the store to pick out his special cup that would only be used at bedtime.
He is 5 now, but can't go to sleep until I give him a sip of water in bed.
good Luck

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S.W.

answers from Seattle on

I would simply just get rid of the bottles and get some of the transitional sippy cups for him to try. if that doesn't work then go straight to an open cup. he may think it is really neat to be drinking from the cup just like mom and dad. You could also try an awards chart to get him motivated. Similar to a potty chart. Everytime he drinks from the cup, he gets a star. at the end of the week with success he gets an award of some sort. I'm guessing if you push it and don't allow the bottle he will catch on pretty quick. good luck!

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A.G.

answers from Portland on

Hi! I can totally relate as my husband & I have been recently trying to ween our son off the bottle. He too drinks water & juice just fine out of a sippy cup but refuses to drink his milk from anywhere but a bottle. Society, including pediatricians, seem to suggest that the weening process should begin as early as 12 months (though I feel that each child is different). My pediatrician suggested 15 months. My son is 16 months now & we started the process last week. We have made some progress. A week ago, he was getting a bottle 3 times a day (morning, nap, & bedtime) which I do believe was a bit excessive for his age. We have now gotten down to 0 to 1 bottle a day. Some days he does just fine without it & others he needs it as a transition when he wakes up in the morning or when he goes down for a nap. We have decided that he can have 6 oz. once a day if needed until he is 2.

I think that every family is different & as a first time mom, I am just learning as I go along. With my son, I worried that he was using the bottle as a pacifier- that he was needing it to go to sleep & I chose to break him of the habit now because I feared that he would not be getting enough nutrition from food. For now, I think one bottle a day is alright & seems to be the only way to make sure he is getting milk.

To get rid of the bottles, we just tried to distract him during the times he normally got the bottle through reading books, playing games, etc. We also gave extra cuddle time & tried to soothe him in other ways (the first night I rubbed his back for a half way to calm him down).

Good luck!

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R.M.

answers from Seattle on

I was just thinking the same thing about my son yesterday and then I read your note today.
I have a two year old with the same attachment to the bottle at home, and I have to say we're at the same cross road.Is it really a big deal? It keeps the peace. It's only at home.
So what's the answer? Do you have to do the cold turkey? How old is too old for a bottle (at home) and do we need to be stronger? He's not a pacifier user or anything ells...but he'll put up a stink for his BA.
If you get any answers or ideas...I'm going through the same problem. I thought we were the only ones.
Thank you

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C.M.

answers from Seattle on

Finally, a mom with kids like mine - normal, not perfect! Hee Hee! The bottle was a tough one for us, too. I just put them all but one of them away one day (the one was for me, when I broke under the pressure). Mary, who's now 3, didn't need it if she didn't see it. We got rid of them about a year ago. About a month ago she noticed "her" old bottle in the cupboard and wanted it. She also still uses her binkie (bed time and nap time and long car trips only).

Our oldest, now 5, had her binkie until just after she was 4 (her teeth are fine). We had the "binkie fairy" come. We occasionally talked about her deciding when we should "call the binkie fairy" to come get her binkies so she could give them to other kids who need them. The binkie fairy trades ALL binkies for a toy of the child's choice. Catie decided one night after she had been to a friend's birthday party and told me the fairy was going to bring her the same doll we gave at the birthday party. Of course, she didn't tell me until bed time when I tried to give her the binkie. Thankfully, after they were in bed I could run to Wal-Mart and get the toy. We made a big deal about "calling" the binkie fairy - where to put them, if it was a fair trade, etc. Never needed it again.

All in time, the kiddos seem to be able to figure it all out. Don't stress yourself out - let the kids take the lead in letting you know when they are ready (all within reason of course - you don't want to pack a bottle in their lunch box for school) and enjoy them while they're small. Before we know it we will be taking the car keys away!!

Have a great day!

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A.D.

answers from Corvallis on

Cold turkey. All at once. Less fear and apprehension for everyone. Tell him it is time tomorrow to drink from a cup like big boys do... and then do it. He can help clean out the cupboard. You could keep one around for him to feed a "baby doll" with (if you want) but "he is a big boy now and can drink from a cup just like Daddy."
Tip- Our children can tell when we are nervous about something and can become so as well. Don't give him an occasion to feel that. He may get upset or just use it against you by throwing a huge fit (knowing how much this means to you)with tears and all till you give in. Either one will not benifit your boy in becoming the man you want him to be someday. Be confident and he will too.
Happy Training!

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D.A.

answers from Portland on

We went through a similar struggle with our two year old son. I read the suggestions, and tried to switch cold turkey and it did not work, or I didn't have the heart to do it. Then I tried again a few months later. It was the same thing. What I found worked in the end, was giving him a sippy cup that is long and thin like a bottle( I think playtex makes them in bright colors with fish and scenes on them) We still went through a very rough week of him not taking any milk or very little and lots of tears( so be prepared for this) but he did get used to it, and we still use the "milk" time as a bonding time- he lays across my lap and drinks like he did with the bottle.

Maybe it will work for you! Good luck!

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S.D.

answers from Portland on

I have a set of twins, and everyone said they needed to be off their bottles at one year. I was a new parent and thought it must be important, so right at one year we tossed all the bottles and made them go cold turkey. It was fairly easy because we had been very strict and NEVER let them have a bottle in bed.

BUT then my little "princess" came along 8 years later and we were alot older, more relaxed and laid back with her and made the mistake of letting her take a bottle to bed. SO it was hard to break her of the habit. We just let her go at her own pace, and yep we heard the comments but as soon as she hit a bit over 2.5 years old she was ready and just all of a sudden gave the bottles up all on her own.

We did the same with potty training, we talked to her about the idea but didn't push the issue and one day a few months after she hit 3 she just decided to go ahead and stop diapers during the day cold turkey.

I think each child is different and some need help to transition and some just need to do things at their own pace. Your son seems to be transitioning well the rest of the time, his bottle is perhaps his way to relax, and feel secure. I am sure soon enough he will be ready to let it go and move ahead without one at all, maybe if you want to help try letting him trade his bottle for a small open cup during evening meals a couple of nights each week.

This is my concept whenever I felt pressured by societal norms with age appropriate transitions, I would tell whomever was commenting things like "well, I am not worried, she will toilet train, or get rid of her bottle when she is ready. I know this as I haven't yet seen a high schooler graduate with a bottle or diaper!" That usually made the person commenting close their mouths.

Good luck, I hope you find something that works for your son and your family.

S.

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W.C.

answers from Seattle on

First do one thing at a time.

Decide which is most important to you.

Embarrassment or dental health? Focus on that and then lay out your plans. Work on rewards, not punishments.

I started my son on a special sippy cup that he helped select. Does your son like chocolate milk?

If these habits not annoy you, don't listen to anyone else.

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C.T.

answers from Seattle on

I don't have direct experience but my friend weaned their son Jack from his binki (at around age 2 because of concerns over his teeth) by slowly cutting a little off until there was nothing left to suck on. It worked really well for them. i don't know if that would translate to the bottle or not. Just a thought. God bless you and your family.

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

My grandboy at a somewhat younger age gave up the breast and the bottle quite easily when his mom gently and matter-of-factly told him that he was getting too big. Just like with Laura U., it was not the big deal we thought it might be. And your son sounds ready, based on his adaptabliliy outside your home.

I think it helps to have your position be clear, gentle, good-humored and unemotional. Don't negotiate. If you are worried that you are somehow going to harm him, he will possibly "get" that on a subconscious level, and it will make the process less gentle on both of you.

In the not-too-likely event that he finds this a traumatic loss, I like Becky L's idea of watering down the milk he takes from the bottle until it loses its charm. Seems like you could do this over a week or ten days. Offer the good stuff in a sippy!

Good luck. First time parenting can be a little nerve-wracking. I'll bet this transition will go smoothly.

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D.L.

answers from Seattle on

We were lucky with the bottle and our little girl gave it up at 15-months after getting over the flu. Pacifiers were a different situation. The "pacifier fairy" came last month and took them for the new babies (this was after weaning her to only pacifiers in bed since November and talking about the fairy for awhile before). In return, she brought our little girl a new doll.

Because he's only using the bottle for milk at home, you've already started weaning him. So at this point in time, you need to go cold-turkey. Whether you let him pick out a new cup, have the bottle fairy come, reward him another way, give them to other babies, or just tell him "no more bottles" is a personal choice - just don't give in. Expect that it will be a battle or crying for 2-5 days (each day better), but if you stick to your guns, it shouldn't be any worse than that. Remind him how proud you are of him for being a "big boy."

Then you can aim on getting rid of the pacifiers by the time he's 3. Everything I've read said that it's harder than ever to get rid of them after age three. Our little girl used and depended on pacifiers more than any other kids we know. The first three nights were so hard and gut-wrenching but she did better than I imagined and only cried at bedtime (not nap-time). Soon she was sleeping better than ever! Once in awhile she'll ask for a pacifier out of the blue, but we remind her that the pacifier fairy took them and that we don't have them and she's over it. You can see the pride on her face when telling others that she gave her pacifiers to the new babies. :-) Our dentist told us we needed to get rid of them because they were mis-shaping her jaw and teeth. In just over a month of no pacifiers, her teeth are already looking better.

So, what ever method you choose, just be consistent and I promise it will be SO much nicer once it's been a week after getting rid of them. I think a lot of the worry is us letting go of those last baby items and seeing our little ones grow up. Also, I don't know about you guys, but my husband and I had a horrible time learning to stop sucking our thumbs (at much older ages) and all those feelings tend to come back up and kids put up on our anxieties. You'll do great! :-)

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J.N.

answers from Seattle on

Hi J.,
I have 3 kids and for each one, as soon as I knew they could easily use the sippy cup, I took the bottle away. There was a day or two of transition, but how easily they forget :) Maybe you could buy some of the disposable cups with straws for your house. I have purchased them at Target and Wal-Mart and they're fairly inexpensive. (They last a long time before you have to toss them or replace the straws).
Also, a binkie tip...this worked like a charm for my kids and my nephew. Instead of taking the binkie away from them, I cut the tip of the nipple off and gave it back to them. It changed the feeling of it when they sucked on it and so they chose not to use it anymore. It was a very easy transition for all of my kids.

Good luck :)

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