How Do We Decide It's Time?

Oh B.

My heart breaks for you and your family. I too have 2 dogs and a clan of cats. This past May while I was pregnant, I had to euthanize my kitty who became very ill, very quickly and it was heart wrenching. It is one of the most difficult decisions we have to make as pet parents. I also had to euthanize my very first dog when I was 21, she had cancer and began to suffer and it wasn't fair to leave her suffering. A few bits of advice, talk with your vet and see if he thinks there are any other logical treatment options, diets, medications? Also, try to really look at how Tasha is behaving, is her spark still there? Does she want to play with her favorite toy? Does she get excited when you ask her if she wants to go for a walk? If the answer is no, then she may be already suffering and ready to go on to a more peaceful place. If the answer is yes, then you may have some good time left to try and help her.

I don't know how old your kids are, but I think being as honest as you can is important unless they are just too young to understand. If you have any belief in heaven, I also believe our beloved pets will be eagerly awaiting for us there. Just try not to tell them that she is being "put to sleep." I worked as a vet technician and one time was assisting a family as their dog was being prepared for euthanasia, and the daughter who was about 11 asked when he was going to wake up again after the shot. It was so hard for the parents to explain right there that the dog wasn't going to wake back up again. Also, I don't personally think that children should witness the euthanasia. It is very hard for an adult to witness, let alone a child. Give you kids time to say good bye and love her one last time when it comes down to it.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

1 mom found this helpful

Soemtimes being a resposible pet owner can be difficult, but now is one of those times. Go to the vet and have him give you all the options. If it is time, you can choose to be with you pet til the end. It can make it better for the kids to be there or not. But you have loved this member of your family and now is not the time to leave him. It will be peaceful if the vet does it and painless.

I am so sorry to hear about your dog. I am a pet lover as well. I just left two dogs and two cats at my parents. I have to make the same decision for the two cats. They are 18 years old and cannot make it through another move with my parents and the girl can barely get up the stairs anymore and they are losing their bowels. I hate to have to do it but they have been good animals and good companions, they are part of my family. I would rather they had a decent death and not prolong the pain for them any longer. If the meds won't work for your dog and there is nothing else they can do short of making her suffer I would have her put down. You sound like you love her, don't let her suffer. She is old for a dog especially for the breed let her go peacefully.

B.-
It is never an easy decision when it comes to putting an animal down. We had to put our 9 year old lab down 2 years ago, and I still wonder if I made the right decision. She had a tumor on her spine and was could not walk on her hind quarters. It came very quickly, and even if surgery was an option (needed a 1000.00 MRI to confirm the tumor first!) I would need another 5000.00 for surgery and the recovery would be very difficult for her. I decided her quality of life was compromised and it would be better for her to just live in Heaven where she could be at peace. All I know is that when I looked in her eyes it was almost as if she was asking me to let her go. I really do think that animals hang out longer for the sake of us, but would much prefer to just be allow to go. The dog that I remembered for so long was no longer there, she just looked sad and tired. It is hard to see your pet suffer and get worse and nothing you do helps.

I don't know how you ever REALLY know it is time, but look at your dog and talk to her. I really do think she will let you know what to do. Never regret your decision no matter what it is. You are doing the best you can and there is no magic answer.

When our dog did go my 2 children were very upset. One of the things I did was to write letters from Heaven and leave them on their pillows at night. I wrote them from the dog explaining how wonderful Heaven was and how much fun she was having. She told them not to be sad and that they could write letters too and leave them on the pillows at night and she would send an angel to get them so she could read what they had to say. It really did make the passing much easier for them, and for me as well.

I wish you luck in the decision you will make. I think you already know what you want to do, you just need some assurance you are doing the right thing.

W. D

It sounds to me like it is time to make your decision. Knowing what my parents went through with our family dog (after I moved out) I know it isn't an easy decision. They considered our dog's age (13 yrs), his chance of recovery (his body systems would likely start to fail in the coming months), what they felt his comfort level was (they felt he was uncomfortable and lethargic), and the vet's opinion (be grateful for the good years we had with him and don't let him suffer). Maybe consulting your vet again with any questions you have will help you to make your decsion. Hugs to you and your family.

Hi B.. I am actually going through the same thing right now so I completely understand. Our Doberman, Kali is 11 years old. Dobe's average lifespan is only 7 yrs. She has cancer. She has several tumors on her body. She can't control her bladder. She cries. She just doesnt' seem to know what to do with herself- wants to be up against one of us at all times and follows us everywhere. She also stinks constantly- mainly because she pees and then lays in it. We know it's time. The vet told us back in the late summer that she only had a few months. I had to put our other Dobe down (he lost his mind...) and it was by FAR the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. And I have had a 2 year old child in the hospital. I am not looking forward to this and neither is my hubby. I told him he's going this time though. I understand how hard this is for you- just try to make the right decision for her, not you. We are holding on for us and we need to stop. The most difficult decision ever. I hope you find the answers you need either way. Good luck.

Listen to your heart.

D.

I had to put down a favourite old horse once, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but I know for sure we made the right decision. I think they tell you in their own way. Here's our story: She was lame on one leg, and on medication for ages on it, hobbled around and seemed in pain, but generally doing ok. This was a very serious leg problem, and there was no cure for it, but with some pain meds, she was still 'herself' if you know what I mean - interested in everything as usual, looking pretty happy etc. One day I came home after a break away, and realised that she was utterly miserable. She had developed another problem in the opposite leg from compensating, the pain meds must not have been helping as much any more, and she generally just looked at me as if to say, isn't enough, enough? I called the vet that day. We had a grave dug on the farm for her for ages - sounds terrible, but during the winter we knew we wouldn't be able to dig in the ground, and she was such a wonderful gal, we knew we wanted her there with us always. Anyway, I had a long chat with her about it, shed many tears and told her I wasn't sure I was doing the right thing, but didn't like to see her so miserable. The day the vet came we didn't know where she was, but found her standing beside her grave - somewhere she never used to go. We all cried and cried, but we knew she wanted us to let her go.

My heart just breaks for you and your family...we just lost our beloved Freddie who was one year old and died tragically from antifreeze poisoning (we still don't know where he got it). We had to have him euthenized after the vet told us he was at a point of no return and it was so difficult. I do know that different vets have different views of treatment options. We had seen a vet that did wholistic pet medicine (acupressure etc.) They usually try different things before suggesting euthenasia. It is quite expensive though.

If and when your doggie has to "cross the rainbow bridge" I think that it has to be a decision that you, your family, and a really good vet make together with the dog's best interest in mind. It's hard to let go, I know!!

Hi B.,
Oh, my heart to you!!
I dont (computer wont let me do contractions, sorry!) know if you have tried this, but felt I should mention. I have had so many experiences where allopathic vets and physicians have not been able to help, and natural means have worked.

One suggestion is to get the dog on some good probiotics immediately. Acidophulus, bifidus, preferable a broad spectrum blend.

Another is to check out homeopathy. There are several good sites, just do a web search. I believe there are some for pets. I seem to recall using them. I have books, so not sure. Homeopathy is very specific, so I cant just find a remedy for you.

By the way, back when the "discoverer" of homeopathy was practicing, he was the only physician able to cure cholera. Drs. like to dismiss homeopathy as sugar pills, but my son avoided surgery, I avoided skin grafts, I was able to get up and feel perfectly normal after delivering a ten pound baby, within hours....powerful stuff.

Moms, if you dont already, I suggest getting Arnica at least and keeping some on hand. It is for bruising and swelling, boo boos. It is what I used it after childbirth. I had no swelling or pain. (Used no drugs during child birth either.)

My oldest fell down the stairs as a young baby. Had a huge goose egg. I made a topical lotion, dissolving arnica tabs in water, and also gave him soft tabs Ithey come two ways, soft or hard)
orally. He calmed down right away and I held him and literally watched the goose egg disappear to not even the slightest bruise.

Another suggestion is Tahitian Noni Juice, from TNI if possible. If you cant find a distributor, I just got some off of ebay. They arent supposed to do that, but not my problem. I can refer you to a distributor if you want.

I have been giving that to my old dog and the only complaint I have is she is acting like a puppy again. Not a serious complaint at all. I saw a difference after one dose. That varies, of course.

Papaya is a possibility. Do a web search. Have food sensitivities been explored? They can develop overnight.

Hope you find something that gives you more time with your wonderful husky. I grew up in Ottawa, and loved to watch the sled races out my window. I have a special place in my heart for Huskies. A very different breed for sure, and they really are family.

Best of luck,
P.

Oh! This is such a difficult decision to make. Two years ago we had to put down our 20-year-old cat. Yes, truly, she was 20 years old! I had Clancey longer than I had children! She was pretty healthy until the last week or so before she was put down. All of a sudden, she would make odd sounds, had no interest in food, and would find strange hiding spots. Finally, she laid down and would not move at all. It was pretty obvious that her long life was coming to an end and that she was suffering.

Unfortunately, we initially made the decision that our little cat was going peacefully, and thought it would be fine to let her just quietly lie in her basket with us nearby to comfort her. She was quiet for two days that way. Unfortunately, on the third day she seemed to be in absolute agony, and I was beside myself for letting her hang on that way. It took us a while to find a vet who would take her right away, as her regular vet was not available. I still feel horrible about that. It was also difficult for the vet to get access for the injection because the cat was so dehydrated.

I only tell you the details so that you can be informed and make good decisions. Ask your vet all the questions you have. Of course, if you have to put your pet down, it will be heartbreaking, but you will know that you did the right thing.

I would get a second opinion and maybe even seek the help of a alternative medicine Vet before making any decisions.

T.

Hi B.:
I'm sorry to hear about your dog and what your going through. My husband and I are big animal lovers. We have 3 dogs and 2 cats and a little 17 month old girl!

Our oldest, Meeka, shes a Keeshond and Fall of 2006 Meeka started to vomit on a daily basis and didnt have much intest in food. She just wasnt herself. She was diagnosed w/ diabetes and we have been treating her for this since then and she is doing well (knock on wood). She is 11. i know you said your dog doesnt have diabetes but for the stomach issues, we have been giving her Femodidine (its a OTC generic form of Pepcid AC). We give her a 10mg tablet every day and it helps. She never throws up now. We have to give her other meds and insulin too but my vet swears by the Femodidine. I thought we defintiely would lose her, she lost almost 15 lbs in a matter of 2-3 months!

Also, with stomach issues, has your vet suggested a bland diet of rice and chichen? You can also throw in some plain cottage cheese for protein. When Meeka had stomach issues, we were told no dog food.

I guess the bottom line is unless your dog really appears to be in pain, I would keep trying to do what you can to make her better and if this is financially possible. Thats just my take. This is coming from someone who has pet insurance on the dogs and would do just about anything for them. But like I said, if the dog is obviously in pain and not getting better after trying for sometime then you have to think of what is best for the dog even though it will be hard on you and your family. I dont know where you are located or if you are happy with your vet but if not, I can definitely refer you to my vet who is wonderful! I live in Collegeville (used to live in Drexel Hill) and will not switch vets, I travel all the way to Glenolden to go to my vet!

Best of luck to you and feel free to contact me if you want to chat or want to know who the vet is!
K.

No one can tell you what to do here. So I am just going to say I am sorry you are going through such a hard time. I know it is no consilation but WOW 14 and 1/2 years is a long time for a large dog like a husky to live. We just put our rotty/ sheppard down before Christmas and she wasn't much worse off than your dog. It is a very tough decision. God bless you and your family through this time.

hello B.:

I've always had dogs and I currently have 2 labs at home.

I'm very sorry to hear that your family is facing a possible loss and I hope that you are able to get through this together.

We have always owned large breed dogs - when I was a kid we had labs, mutts and collies. Unfortunately, the larger they were the shorter their lifespan.

I've always felt it better to help a pet who is suffering by euthanizing them verses having them in pain.

My advice to you is to evaluate your pet's health. Perhaps an outsider -- maybe the mailman etc. will give you a good opinion of how you dog's getting along. Consult with the vet about the best course of action, but remember that quality of life you pet has enjoyed and determine if they'd be happier "infirmed" than put at peace.

I have never had to make these decisions with kids before - as it is now, I have an 18mo old and 2 dogs (3yr and 2.5 yrs). I can see that my dogs may pass during a sensitive time for my son.

I was just at Banfield Vet with one of my dogs and saw some literature there regarding "the loss of a pet". They had some good suggestions on book and materials to help ease the family through. Maybe you could pick one up (they're free) or perhaps your vet had this type of thing.

Good luck and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

You'll know. I don't know how to explain it, but I have had pets pretty much all my life, and you just know in your heart when it's time to let go. If you look in her eyes and see the pain it is time to say good-bye for now. Our family went through this just last spring. It's never easy, espically when you have kids that love...my heart goes out to you.

Oh no! I feel your heartache - my 8yo Rottie was just dx'd w/ bone cancer so we'll be going thru this in a couple months (if that). I have no answers, but want to offer my support and prayers thru this tough time.

From what I understand Regalan sp is a mild medication that they sometimes give to breastfeeding mothers. I would look into a regular antacid for your dog. You may want to keep him on that too if it was helping. I don't know why he was taken off of it. I don't like the idea of euthanasia, sometimes it doesn't even work and the animals suffer. Recently there was a puppy euthanized on a Friday and found in the freezer on Monday at one veterinarian. Not only that, but if it was a good idea, then why don't we use it on people? I don't like it.
Your dog doesn't sound that bad off either. Try to find another alternative. If your vet thinks that you should put your dog asleep, maybe it's time to find another vet.
You really need to find out the cause as to why your dog is thowing up. Did the vet do any testing?... or give a diagnosis? You can't always trust a doctor or a vet. You have to do alot of research yourself. Good luck.

Hi B.,
As an animal lover I understand your delema. My cat Josie was 14 3/4 old. She would not stop vomiting too. She wouldn't even eat because she knew she would vomit. The vet said this is the 'beginning' and it would be up to me to make the decision on putting her down or not. My husband and I decided that she had a long and healthy life and it wasn't fair to Josie that we kept her around because we didn't want her to go-she was suffering and by vomiting and not eating, that is suffering-plus we were suffering by seeing her that way. She was put down 2 days after I came home with our baby and talk about post partum blues! I bawled and bawled because she was my baby and was with me even before the hubby and everyone else. But in the end, she needed to be put in a better place where she would be comfortable. It was one of the hardest decisions we ever had to make! We did try meds and trips every week to the vet but in the end it was just her time to go and not to suffer anymore.
I hope I helped by sharing my experience and good luck please, let us know what happens!
Sincerely,
Christina

Hi B.,

My heart breaks for you as you struggle with this difficult decision. We went through the same thing just over a year ago and I know this is frustrating at the same time that it is tearing you apart.

After watching our beautiful 12-1/2 year old German Shepherd, Cassie, start to decline, we confirmed our suspicions with some tests...she had cancer. The veterinarian, God bless her, suggested that we go home, spend time with Cassie and watch the signs that she was giving to us. We struggled since we didn't want to "give up" too soon, but definitely did not want her to suffer to ease our pain. Thanks to the vet's advice, we scheduled the hardest day of our lives, but spent two wonderful days with our precious girl. There was something comforting in knowing that 1) We would be able to say goodbye to her, not just wake up one morning to find her gone (we all three took her to the vet that morning and held her) and 2) We knew that her suffering was almost over. Something that brought me peace was knowing that she would have done this for me.

As for your kids, one of the things that helped our 10-year-old son was that he knew it was coming, and made the most of his remaining time with her. He and I made her a bandana to wear when she arrived in Heaven. We all wrote her a love note on that bandana (OK, now I am totally bawling) If Tasha has a favorite blanket or something, the love notes can be written there too. Our son was with us when she left this world and he knows that she will be the first one to meet him in Heaven. It really helped. She also was cremated with her bed, and some of her favorite toys and bones. The vet's office gave us lots and lots of time to spend with her when it was done. All of these things made her departure much easier.

I wish that there was some magic formula to make this easier but please know that my thoughts are with you.

What I am about to say may sound calloused, but please think these words over later: I recommend getting another dog as soon as possible. I always thought that seemed wrong, but the absence of Cassie was unbearable. I came to realize that I was not replacing her, but that she had been such an enormous part of our lives for so long (in our sons case, all of his life) that I became aware of the absence of her sounds, her habits, etc. Our new dog will never take Cassie's place, but is a tribute to her and all the love she gave us and how much she contributed to our world.

I wish I could say more, but you are absolutely welcome to email me personally (____@____.com) and I will support you in any way I can.

Take care,

D.

As all the other people have commented, I'm sorry your "baby's" not feeling well. It is so tough when our non-human family members get ill too. I know you said you went to the vet. Did they check your dog for Kidney disease
Liver disease, Gastrointestinal disease, Inflammatory bowel disease, Cancer, and Diabetes mellitus? Also, 14.5 is a LONG lifespan for a large dog... not saying they can't live longer, but that is a very good lifespan). Everyone who has responded to your question has given great advice! Another option, is to call and ask another vet thier opinion or talk to someone at a pet store who might give you sound advice. I hope your dog is feeling better soon, but if not, as hard as it will be, go with your gut feeling. As stated by one other, tell your kids the truth about Tasha if you have to put her down. It's a great oppurtunity to teach them about life and death (unfortunately). They will see that you are upset, and know that it's ok to be upset too, and they will also know that you did what was necessary to help Tasha so she wouldn't suffer. My thoughts and prayers are with you....

36 y.o. mom of 3 boys, 1 dog (We had 2 malamutes, now we have a choc. lab/boxer) and 2 cats (One little one in which has had 2 operations already (she's now about 5 mo. old) We are continually watching her and hoping she will be fine.

When the bad days start to out number the good days.

I had to do this not long ago. My Candy Sue who was also a large dog, was 18, she had a great life with me. But it was time, she lost her sight years ago, she couldn't hear. And now she was crazy. She had dementia, and it was heart breaking to see her like that. They days got worse, it was hard for her to get around. Winter was coming and it got worse with the cold. The bad days were creeping up. She was a great dog and no amount of meds would keep her like I wanted to remember her. I let her go. Hardest thing I had to do was make the appointment.

I wish I didn't have to make that choice and she would go at home, but our vet told us it was going to be a long painful road of uncertainties, and there was going to be nothing painless about going at home.

Good luck.

I'm so sorry to hear about your struggle. I married into having a dog that I didn't really want, but after time, I grew attached. He was a black lab 11 years old and all of a sudden started throwing up last Jan. My husband took him for tests and found that he had a tumor in his prostate. He had surgery for that. Then it was something else, then something else. He always had really bad allergies and was on 3 medications at one time. He ended up being dehydrated around April, so every 3 days he went to the vet to get a quart of IV injected under his skin. That went on for about 3 months. The vomiting only got worse, then he started peeing everywhere and he was barracaded in our kitchen. I couldn't take seeing him like that anymore. I also didn't have much of a say in the matter because it wasn't my dog and my husband assumed I just wanted the dog out of my life, which wasn't true. The vet never told my husband it was "time" or he should rethink all the effort, so my husband kept trying to keep him alive more for himself than for Nero. It was July 10 when my husband finally decided it was time...that was the day after my baby shower. It was heart wrenching, but something that was inevitable. The moral of the story is, prepare yourself and don't do it until you are ready, but just make sure the dog doesn't suffer too much in the process.