How Do I Wean a 2 Year Old from Breastfeeding

I too am wondering why the big push to wean. My son was forced to wean when I was hospitalized very suddenly and that did not make for a happy boy... for a long time. My daughter however was allowed to wean on her time schedule and did so at age 4. She was much happier and so was I.

There were boundaries for her as she got older, like you need to wait til Mommy is finished with this task or we will be home soon and then I will feed you. But she adjusted very well to this. I too never let my children cry alot BUT that did not mean I gave into their demands. I would comfort them but would not allow them to, for example, get a toy at WalMart just because they were pitching a fit. One time I took my entire cart to the service desk and apologized but explained I had to leave because of one child's wrong choices. When they looked at my child, instantly there was silence. My child did not like the disapproval of a store person! But I left anyway and drove straight home, all the time discussing how sad I was that we got nothing from the Store. As soon as I arrived home, said toddler was strictly dealt with and put down for a nap. Trust me they remembered what they had done even when they got home.

I never had to leave a store again because they knew I would keep the promise of leaving in the middle of everything. The point of all of this is to say, don't let breastfeeding, or anything for that matter, become a power play. However, don't feel pressured that you are forced to quit unless you are both ready to.

If you just feel like you can no longer breastfeed, then make sure that before the suggestion arises you offer a yummy food to fill her up, which will naturally eliminate the need. Remember, if you offer it after she's asked to breastfeed, then its too late.

Hope this helps! Best wishes!

do it really gradually, you may even need to pump and give it to her in a cup or bottle(say while you conveniently won't be with her) she will still taste your milk and see that she can get nourishment another way, then slowly start decreasing the time she has at breast and also decrease the times you pump so that it isn't as uncomfortable for you because it does hurt if you get backed up.

Hi A.,

Congrats on going 2 years strong! We made it that far too and I have never regretted it. Quite the contrary, as my girl is reaping the benefits, and we plan to do the same for our next little one.

There was just recently a Q & A about this exact topic by Dr Sears. The link is:

http://mothering.com/sections/experts/sears-archive.html#...

Hope this helps!

I am 1st time SAHM at 42 as well w/a 17 month old & am trying as well! I stopped daytime nursing for a few months (until he got really sick w/ high fevers & refused drinks)... so I am interested as well!

Anytime I had to get my son to quit something, I worried and worried about it. So blankie, thumbsucking, and bottle (he weaned gradually from breast feeding at about 9 months) were three things he cried about for about one day and then that was it. You think that the whining will go on for days/weeks, but somehow they are capable of moving on quickly. I think the trick is to not give in after you have made up your mind. Maybe you could offer special cuddle time when they have a sippy cup or snack.

My kids have both kind of gradually become interested in other foods and drinks, but when I've intentionally cut a feeding, I find that it helps to give them a snack and sippy cup. Some food that they really like to distract them! Or do any activity that always gets her attention. When I weaned my daughter at bedtime, her dad added a story before nursing for about a week, then he just put her in bed without me nursing her. It was hard, but sticking with it is easier in the long run.

I would only stop one feeding at time--for both your sakes! I always pick the one they're least interested in, or the one that's least convenient.

Remember to give her lots of love and one-on-one time when you're not nursing--they miss the snuggling and the quiet time just as much as the milk.

I think it's great that you've worked with her needs this way.

Hi, I breastfed both of my girls. I had no trouble weaning them. I started feeding them food before nursing and it wasn't long at all before they started wanting it less and less. Both of mine were weaned around a year old. I no longer remember the exact age. She will wean herself when it is time. At least both of mine did. Enjoy every minute of every day with her. Before you know it she will be off to college and you will wish you had this time back.

Wow! 2yrs old and still breast feeding..U definately need to ween her off!! I thought I was bad. I breastfed my daughter, who was my first child until she was 12 months old. It got painful after awhile. She used to fall asleep while breastfeeding and she had teeth !! I had a hard time prying her off as she slept. LOL I laugh about it now but it did hurt. Im sure you're feeling the same. It was hard to ween my daughter too.. she kept reaching for my breast and wanting it.. I kept telling her no more ... all gone... you get to be a big girl now... when the doctor told me I could give her regular milk I wasted no time giving her a bottle... she eventually took to it... try giving her a bottle or a sippy cup ... make it a game that she wins! U won a sippy cup! But I tell you, you are doing her and yourself an injustice keeping her on your breast... its a needy thing for them... the sucking .. the closeness to you .. it makes them feel secure .. an attachment to you..i know it feels wonderful... motherly and all but its not good for their growing process.. she'll grow up a needy child..its like they say when a child is in school and they come home with homework we as moms want to help them .. sit down with them .. and work out their homework but in reality we are stunting their abilities to do things on their own..then they become very dependent on you !
I hope this helps you.
B. S

Hi A., What i did with my now 13 year old-was mixing formula with milk. But you might want to check with your pediatrician. With my now 9 year old, I had go to straight formula as I stopped lactating after 3 weeks. Check with your ped.

I nursed both of my kids till there were 2 and a few months. With my son, I was pregnant with my daughter, he was like 22 months or so, I stopped cold turkey one night and gave him a sippy cup with water - he turned over and was okay with it. With my little girl, it was harder. She too would cry but for only like 5 or 10 minutes then go to sleep - it took about a month before she finally stopped. I would still love on her and all. I was ready more so than they were. And they were getting nutrition from food now so they really didn't need me. I miss those days sometimes tho..
It will stop.

I did not have a vard time weaning, but my daughter was much younger, and had much less of a strong will. However early on when I was trying to get her to take the bottle, just so that we could date and leave her with a sitter, or dad could watch her while I grocery shopped, she never did take a bottle though. Anyway one of the things that a lot of people told me to do was try not being there. You may try a weekend away from her. Gradually weaning however, may be harder, but will be less painful. If you leave her and wean cold turkey, you are likely to become very full, and that is painful. I would try to cut out all the nursing early in the day, for a period of a week or two, and then that bed time nursing last. Good Luck and congratulations on making it this far.

I agree with the other moms that say it may be too early for her emotionally to stop completely nursing. Every child is different and each one deals with emotions, needs, trust and security differently. My daughter nursed frequently until she was 3 (and VERY frequently still at age 2)and I didn't actively do anything to wean her.... she gradually just stop requesting regularly. I've never denied her but I have distracted her or had her wait until it was more opportune (like not nursing in line at Target and waiting until we got home...).

Nursing is very special for the child, even after the 'specialness' has worn off for the mom. It serves not only as a continued source of excellent nutrition and antibodies but at age 2 serves strongly as a source of security, comfort and bonding...all which are so vital at this stage of their little lives. It is also a great health benefit to you. If you feel you MUST wean her, do it slowly and gradually- and with the least amount of force and stress. She will not understand why you want to end something she sees as so wonderful to both of you. She will not understand why you are pulling away from her (in her eyes) when she trusts and feels so secure with you. She sees nursing as a loving gesture and at 2 she likely won't nderstand why you don't want to nurse her. She is not only just used to it, but gains so much pleasure and security from it, which is why you have experienced that she cries and cries when denied.

If you must wean now, before she has demonstrated that she is ready, go slow and be very understanding. My opinion is that letting her cry and cry will create more problems than it is worth (emotional, security, trust) especially after investing so much in creating such a wonderful bond and relationship already. Best wishes to you and her!! :-)

I agree wholeheartedly with Susan T. I breastfeed my oldest until age 3, second until age 2, and still nursing my third who is now 15 months. Most researchers believe in a child-led weaning though mommy's energy needs to also be evaluated. Consider yourself "weaning" your child when you eliminate a feeding a day. Then eventually they only nurse to sleep at night. If your child is crying and upset, it may be too soon to consider weaning. What I did was make a big deal of it. "In 14 days no more num's num's because you will be a big girl." Count it down....give a big girl gift. It's a process. Sometimes you backtrack other days you've hardly nursed at all. If a mother nurses for 3 years in her lifetime, she reduces her risk of breast cancer by 30%. Toddlers love extended nursing for the emotional benefits. They are scrambling away from mommy but love to come back and reconnect when they can. It helps them feel safe in this big world. That's what being a parent is all about.

Hi A.,
First, congratulations on breastfeeding for two years! The health benefits to yourself and your child are many. As to your question, first you should ask yourself why you want to wean now. If it is because of outside pressure, I would suggest you not wean for that reason. Don't let others influence your decision if this is working for you. Believe me, your daughter will wean on her own. But if you really want or need to wean, I would suggest a book called "How weaning happens" by Diane Bengman (I think that's her name--I can't find my book right now.) At two years old, you should be able to distract her from breastfeeding with other activities. And remember not to wean too abruptly, take away just one session at a time leaving the most important bf sessions for last.
As for your comment about spoiling her--you're not! You are treating her with respect by responding to her cries and creating a strong bond between the two of you that will last a lifetime! As long as you discipline approriatly when needed, extra cuddle time will always be a benefit.