How 2 Approach a Neighbor in Above Condo Who Are Smokers and Affecting Family

Updated on December 20, 2011
K.C. asks from Henderson, NV
19 answers

I need some advice. We have owned in our condo for 5 years now. I get the ups and downs of condos. You share your space with neighbors. We bought our condo new so smells have not been an issue. The upstairs condo has been rented out and the new tenants have come. Within a week the smells of cigarettes have come through the vents. I've never talked to them, I've seen a moving van and noticed young kids' toys. But my comings and goings have not met them yet. We smell like smokers down here. I want to know if it would be wrong to mail a letter,without any menace and just politely plead from a mom to a mom and a dad to a dad if they could smoke outside. I have two young kids and I too would like to enjoy my pleasant smells again. Could you let me know your thoughts or am I overstepping And if I'm overstepping could you give me advice on those who have been in this sitauation how they covered up the smells. Candles and airfreshners have already started. Thank you for any advice

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So What Happened?

Thank you for your words of wisdom. It gave me the point of view of the smoker and how what I do really won't change their choice in their home. I am headed to get the heavy duty vent filters. I really appreciate your help before I did something filpantly.

Featured Answers

K.L.

answers from Sacramento on

Well, if they're renters, maybe send a letter to the condo owner. A lot of owners don't actually allow smoking, so the renters May be doing it against policy. That's such a bummer, to smell cigs in a non smoking house...

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E.M.

answers from Honolulu on

Wait, they are renters? I know of some places that have it in lease that you can't smoke. Could you talk to the landlords?

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

I agree that this is a building problem. The vents need fixing... and probably aren't up to code (depends on your state) if you're getting air from your neighbors. Ditto heating and cooling costs must be through the ROOF if all you cold air is going to the bottom units and your hot air rising to the above units!

There's honestly little to nothing you can do about your neighbors. Even in people who are TRYING to smoke outdoors... the habit of smoking indoors is about as hard to break as smoking itself. Most indoor smokers I know (including myself... but I heard the trick from others a good 12 years ago when I didn't want to smoke indoors anymore) is to actually MOVE. Once you've gotten used to smoking in a certain place, it's practically impossible to quit smoking in that place, and it comes with a lot of acrimony (trust me as someone from a state that banned smoking in bars... it took 2 solid years before it became habit for people to go outside. People just *forget*... and that's when there's a law in place and people telling you the moment you light up that you have to go outside).

Trying to get them to change is going to be an effort of futility and frustration.

Getting your vents fixed, otoh, will not only solve the smoke problems... but also lower your heating/cooling bill!

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree about sending a letter to the condo's owner. And mention that the smell of smoke in the condo will make it more difficult for him/her to rent it out to future tenants. But I wouldn't bother speaking to the current tenants themselves. That is their home. They won't stop just because you, a neighbor they don't really have to care about, ask them to.

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T.H.

answers from Odessa on

Personally I do smoke but not in my house but I get upset when people (strangers) walk up and talk to me about quitting and the dangers of smoking on my children, I mean when I see poeple over eatting or giving babies soda I can't march up and lecture them. Anyway if I got the letter I wouldn't quit smoking not because I don't like you or anything personal I just think I pay the rent/mortage here it's my space to do as I please. At my home I leave the "butts" on the ground but at others I pick them up and take them home to throw in the dumpster. one of my friends had a upstairs neighbor throwing the butts over the railing and I agreed with her that it was wrong since it they landed at her front door and I can see this is somewhat the same as the vent blowing smoke into your condo but I know I wouldn't quit smoking inside for a neighbor. Sorry

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

Well, perhaps there's a clause in their lease that says no smoking in the condo? Probably ask your HOA.

Otherwise....of course you're not overstepping to ask them to smoke outdoors, but then they are not actually overstepping smoking indoors, you know?

Sigh, sorry.

:(

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Do not be passive about this! This is not about smokers rights first and foremost -- it is about the right you and your family have to live in a healthy environment. And nothing should take precedent over that! If you can smell their smoke, then you are being exposed to second hand smoke, and that is something you simply should not tolerate.

Here is a fact sheet on making your condo smoke-free:

http://www.phlpnet.org/tobacco-control/products/how-make-...

This issue should definitely be a board priority as second hand smoke will affect everyone living there, and you have a legal right to restrict it in the condo complex.

You should absolutely write a letter to the owner of the condo first and foremost (it is inexscusable of them not to make this a stipulation of the rental agreement, and indeed they may have). Then write a letter to the condo board, and request a board meeting to discuss this issue, as it affects everyone in that building. You can make your building smoke free, but you'll need to be an advocate and educator with your condo board to make this happen. There are huge resources online to help you deal with just this situation (google " non smoking condo " and you'll get lots of help .

I'm sorry you are in this situation, but do not believe you can do nothing but buy air filters. This is a health issue and quality of life issue . You cannot allow this to go on without a fight to protect your family.

In the meantime, I would suggest getting an air purifier, and Hepa filters -- but don't stop there. Everyone in your building will benefit by your activism on this issue (including the smoker's family!) Good luck !

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

You are overstepping, it is their right to smoke inside however, gross that may be. I suggest buying a good air purifier or moving.

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A.S.

answers from Iowa City on

If they are smoking in their condo, they probably don't want to smoke outside so you requesting that that do so probably won't amount to much. Sending a note is not going to do anything but annoy them. Consider getting an air purifier and some peace lilies.

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

That sucks, but it's their home and they can do what they please.

I think you should approach the condo association and ask about the vents.

For now, you can get vent filters. They do restrict air flow, but they may help filter some of it out in your case. They are super cheap and come in packs of 10. You cut it to fit your vent. We use them to help filter out allergens.

You can also get furnace filters that help filter out smoke. That may also help. Look for them at your local hardware store. The ones we get filter out cat dander and other small particles.

We live in a condo but we don't get anything from anyone else's condo, just cooking smells in the hallway.

Good luck!

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K..

answers from Phoenix on

This is part of the deal with sharing walls & space with other people. I'm sorry, but I don't think you're going to be able to stop them from smoking, as they are not doing anything illegal. You can make the owner aware, but unless they aren't supposed to be smoking, then there's not much they can do.

I would do as much as I could to make sure their smoke smell didn't waft into my house.

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K.S.

answers from Miami on

They have the right to the free enjoyment of the unit and you cannot stop them from smoking on their patio. . They cannot throw cigarettes over he balcony onto the ground outside. I would change your filters because they are not working.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Living in Vegas where they have recently banned smoking inside restaurants, I have heard so many complaints of "smoker's rights". My husband is a smoker too and he complains he has no rights either (whatever!). So my hunch is that they will be offended at the second you make a complaint about their smoke. It is a real tough situation. I know the smoke comes through the vents and walls. I can tell inside the house if my husband smokes one cigarette in the garage. There are no vents leading to the garage, so I know it will go through the walls too. I smell it immediately. You can try the vent filters mentioned and try sealing any possible cracks from any neighboring walls. I think a lot of the smoke here travels through the stairs.

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M.B.

answers from Washington DC on

The problem sounds like the building's problem. I lived in an apartment complex and the only smells I EVER smelled that weren't ours were in the hallway. It doesn't sound right that it's coming through the vents... That should all be separate...

...and what I would do? Buy a few air purifiers, one for each room a person is sleeping and one for the main living area. Sure, they are expensive, but especially in your case, worth it. I would not use candles or air fresheners, cause that does not lower your chance of carcinogens getting into your lungs.

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J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Check out http://www.tobaccofreeca.com/smoking-problem/secondhand-s... You, the owner of that unit (keep in mind those people are RENTERS) and the condo board do have rights here, regardless if those people are "in their own home." There is legislation changing in California that can make it nearly impossible for people to smoke inside buildings if there are shared walls and vents. You shouldn't have to just "suck it up" if what you and your children are sucking up is toxic second-hand smoke. Put pressure on your condo board and the owner of the unit. Your rights as an owner supersede the rights of a renter.

J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

There is nothing you can do to make them stop. I would suggest an air filter or air purifier in your home to help keep clean the odors. Too many air fresheners and/or candles will only add more chemicals that your children are breathing in.
If you know the landlord you can ask him/her to put “no smoking in the condo” on the next lease. I have rentals and this is something that I always add. I do not want my properties smelling like cigarettes and as long as it is in the contract I can keep the security deposit if they do smoke. It stays in the walls and vents and is so hard to clean out.

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

IF you are smelling it then you are taking in 2nd or 3rd hand smoke ... I would simply talk to them - honestly there is nothing that can be done unless you have an HOA that is willing to jump in if they are not helpful. Many people who rent out properties do not allow smoking IN the property, but who is to say they did not lie to the landloard. Most that smoke inside will always smoke inside no matter your preference ... the arguement of "it's my home and I will do what I want" comes into play.

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K.S.

answers from Reno on

Non-smokers with serious breathing disabilities or smoke allergies have legal protection under the Americans with Disabilities Act and the Fair Housing Act. You can contact the organization in your community that is responsible for ensuring that these laws are followed. If you live in Northern Nevada it would be the Silver State Fair Housing Council. Even if you or your family doesn’t have health issues you still have some options. I’d recommend meeting them face-to-face vs. a note. You can also contact the landlord to discuss the smoking policy. Landlords should make “reasonable accommodations” and that can often mean moving tenants to a ground floor apartment, next to a non-smoker, or letting someone out of their lease without penalties. Another option might be to contact the home owners association (HOA) and discuss the rules about nuisances. These often cover loud noise, cooking odor, etc. and cigarette smoke can sometimes be regulated via these rules as long as the HOA board is supportive.
A great website is www.mismokefreeapartment.org and while it contains specific information about Michigan law it also does a nice job explaining issues around tobacco use in apartments for both tenants and landlords.

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T.M.

answers from Tampa on

I get why you are irritated...this would drive me insane too. However, I don't think there is any way that you can talk to them and tell them not to smoke in their own home.... If anything, you can try to appeal to the landlord, but I am not sure how far that would go. Invest in the filters and fans and see if that helps. Sorry...I would be super pissed too.

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