A.A. asks from Laguna Niguel, CA on July 29, 2009
Home Schooling? - Laguna Niguel, CA
I am interested in any information on home schooling. Pros/Cons? How do you feel children can benefit from this or do they "miss out" in any way?
Thanks!
Amy
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D.B. answers from Honolulu on July 30, 2009
My former husband is a private school teacher. His experience was that when home-schooled children entered his classroom for the first time, they were 2-3 years behind in social skills (how they interact with other children, with the teacher, ability to handle multiple tasks/circumstances). From the standpoint of "book" education level, some were behind and some were ahead of the other students. Probably depends on the home parent doing the home schooling. : )
db
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D.M. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
I homeschool all three of my children and they're all a year ahead of their peers. I've been homeschooling for nine years. My daughter went to school one year because she needed the change but now she doesn't want to go back! There are so many kids being homeschooled out there; there are park days and field trips and classes...they don't miss out on anything, if anything, they have a better school experience. Homeschooling is not for everyone but it's right for us. You know what they're learning and it keeps them innocent for a while longer than their public school peers.
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I.S. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
Look into Connections Academy, its a state run virtual school, you'll need a computer. My daughter used it through junior high and missed out on all the drama of bullying and what to wear. However, socialization is important, and there are field trips with this school. But if you're child isn't ready for a brick and mortar school for any reason, this is a great school. My daughter is now excited to get back into the social scene at the local h.s. Most of the kids at this school were either sportsmen, sick, or just didn't fit in at a regular school...sometimes because they were too smart.
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R.J. answers from San Diego on July 30, 2009
We absolutely looove it (ahem, and yes, we so have bad days/weeks here and there) we are so NOT the "everything is wonderful all the time" homeschooling family. Haha! But I have hope. It's unrealistic, but it's hope none the less ;) One thing to note...you certainly don't have to "know everything" in order to teach. Half the value of NOT knowing is watching your child watching YOU learn, and how to research, not to be afraid of asking hard questions, of learning that not everyone has an answer all the time..and how to go about FINDING those answers. Wheee fun. There's also the plain and simple, signing them up for classes. I speak 3 languages. None of them are spanish. My son wanted to learn spanish...so he has a spanish teacher and he uses PowerSpeak and Rosetta stone. Me? Nada. Well...as good as. I don't think 50 words counts. Some of the classes we sign our son up for are for things we don't have an interest in learning/teaching...others are because we're "too close". Our son is in music lessons...but his dad is a professional musician. All of the outside classes/sports ALSO provide a medium in which our son gets to learn to relate to other kids and adults without mum & dad. Most of us homeschoolers don't actually lock ourselves away in a cupboard and hide from society.
In my experience the pros and cons are usually one and the same...which create something new...a hurdle to be surmounted:
(Just a teensy few of) the common pro/con Examples
* Individualized lesson planning
Pro: You child gets to learn at their own rate. This means you can have a 2nd grader doing 5th grade math, but reading at a first grade level...no problem. They want to study outer space for 3 months? Have at. You can do math/science/reading/history/spelling/field trips/art/home ec/ all'uva'that'an'more set against a background theme of space. Or dinosaurs. Or chocolate truffles. Or pirates. Or cars. Pick an intrest and you've got every subject you can think of wrapped up in it. You get to pick all of the non-core things you want. You want music, art, languages, circus arts, baking, dolphin training, footbal, gymnastics, sheesh...pick an extra curricular, and you get the option of that being offered for your child through their school.
Con: <laughing> You actually have to figure OUT where they're at and do the durn lesson planning and then you have to be flexible to boot! There is NO such thing as a complete curriculum (school in a box) if you're going by your child's actual strengths and weaknesses. Most of us end up borrowing this curriculum from these people for this subject, that curriculum for that subject, these books for reading (hello library!) To top it off...we all have a lesson that sounds fantastic in our heads that just flops like a dead fish in real life...or the 5 minute quicke thing we were just going to mention in passing that becomes a two week affair that you have study like crazy to go into half as much depth as your child wants. Gack. It's not as bad as all that, but flexibility...and learning when to scrap idea "x" is key. So is figuring out how to pay for stuff. There are gazillions of HS discounts out there, special rates, special classes...but same as with the lesson planning...you actually have to DO it and find them.
* Many (if not most) homeschooled kids are done with highschool by 14/15.
Pro:
Duh.
Con:
Yikes!
* Time with other kids
Pro: You can set up their schedule so that they have a lot or a little,. Activites & playdates out the wazoo...or more time solo. . For example: my son last year had at least an hour to 3 hours a day with between 4 & 30 kids. We found that it was too much and too little. He did tons of ACTIVITIES with a lot of other kids (classes, sports, camps)...but he didn't have a lot do downtime/silly time with other kids. So this year we're making academics less of a focus, so we can focus more on letting him grow some relationships. (We live on a busy street, and he's an only...so it's not built in by geography). We're a few years ahead of his grade reqs at this point, (ahem, and I'm not as freaked out), so even if we slip back a bit we'll be fine. My friends who've been doing this awhile though, say that when they did the same thing...if anything...their kids went through their academics faster. Sheesh. We'll see. You also know by and large who they're spending time with. If someone's a bully you can choose to let your child work it out, or you can pull them from the situation as you deem best. Your child isn't "stuck" with Moe for the next 10 months, unless YOU choose for them to be. And yes. I have done both.
Con: It's not built in by default by a 7-8 hour day with the same 30 kids all year. You don't have to arrange facetime between you and your child if you're homeschooling, but you DO have to arrange it with other kids. That is, if you want them to develop those skills & relationships.
* Time for yourself
Con: You have to arrange that time.
Pro: You can arrange it when YOU want it (by and large). Sure it's not a 7 hour block that you can depend on 5 days a week (I take that back, it could be if you arranged it that way). How we all take our time for ourselves varies family by family. Some have a spouse that they trade off with, other's do it via classes and camps, some just take half an hour of quiet time after lessons, some set up movies during lunch, some trade babysitting, some trade teaching, some have a part time nanny, some use after-school-care like the Y or elsewhere, some, some...
* The time & work involved
Con: Self explanatory
Pro: You get to schedule that time when, where, and how you like it. Whether it's lesson planning or actual teaching or transporting to/from outside lessons or activites you are (mostly) in control of every aspect of scheduling. You can call school on account of good weather one day and go to the beach...or bring your books & projects with you and do beach school that day, you can do year round school, you can take vacations when you want them, conversely you can stay on an interesting subject for and stay in school an extra few weeks. You can do travel school. You can, you can, you can...the scheduling options are pretty unlimited. And there's no parent conference trying to figure out what's been going on that quarter...you know exactly what's going on.
Anyhow...I could go on and on and on...and these are only a few of the most common pros and cons in my experience. Some great resources with better writers than myself:
http://homeschooling.gomilpitas.com/
http://www.hsc.org/
http://www.amazon.com/Homeschooling-Take-Deep-Breath-This...
* * *
Incedentally....It's hard to wrap our heads around sometimes...but the current educational model is reeeeally new. Like the past 75-100 years. It's hard to wrap our heads around because WE all did it, and our PARENTS all did it. (Kind of like driving cars. While we may know intellectually that our grandparents didn't have them...it's kind of hard to FEEL that in our gut) Most of our grandparents though were in multiage classrooms or had private tutors (& or governesses). For the past several thousand years the vast majority of schooling (child-wise) was done in the home. A person had to be very very LUCKY to be educated...but those that were...let's see here: The Greeks, The Romans...any famous mathematical, scientific, military, philosophical thinkers there? Hmmmm....
Here's a very very short list of famous more modern people though (you can find much longer lists online...Heaven forbid we just lump them all into "Marge, they're just weird...how could they ever have been properly socialized?" because they didn't go to modern day public school ;) :
Famous Homeschoolers
Educators
Frank Vandiver (President - Texas A&M)
Fred Terman (President - Stanford)
William Samuel Johnson (President Columbia)
John Witherspoon (President of Princeton)
Generals
Stonewall Jackson
Robert E. Lee
Douglas MacArthur
George Patton
Inventors
Alexander Graham Bell
Thomas Edison
Cyrus McCormick
Orville Wright & Wilbur Wright
Artists
Claude Monet
Leonardo da Vinci
Jamie Wyeth
Andrew Wyeth
John Singleton Copley
Presidents
George Washington
Thomas Jefferson
John Quincy Adams
James Madison
William Henry Harrison
John Tyler
Abraham Lincoln
Theordore Roosevelt
Woodrow Wilson
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Scientists
George Washington Carver
Pierre Curie
Albert Einstein
Booker T. Washington
Blaise Pascal
Statesmen
Konrad Adenauer
Winston Churchill
Benjamin Franklin
Patrick Henry
William Penn
Henry Clay
United States Supreme Court Judges
John Jay
John Marshall
John Rutledge
Composers
Irving Berlin
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Anton Bruckner
Felix Mendelssohn
Francis Poulenc
Writers
Hans Christian Anderson
Charles Dickens
Brett Harte
Mark Twain
Sean O'Casey
Phillis Wheatley
Mercy Warren
Pearl S. Buck
Agatha Christie
C.S. Lewis
George Bernard Shaw
Religious leaders
Joan of Arc
Brigham Young
John & Charles Wesley
Jonathan Edwards
John Owen
William Cary
Dwight L. Moody
John Newton
Others
Charles Chaplin - Actor
George Rogers Clark - Explorer
Andrew Carnegie - Industrialist
Noel Coward - Playwright
John Burroughs - Naturalist
Bill Ridell - Newspaperman
Will Rogers - Humorist
Albert Schweitzer - Physician
Tamara McKinney - World Cup Skier
Jim Ryan - World Runner
Ansel Adams - Photographer
Charles Louis Montesquieu - philosopher
John Stuart Mill - Economist
John Paul Jones - father of the American Navy
Florence Nightingale - nurse
Clara Barton - started the Red Cross
Abigail Adams - wife of John Adams
Martha Washington - wife of George W.
Constitutional Convention Delegates
George Washington - 1st President of the U.S.
James Madison - 4th President of the U.S.
John Witherspoon - President of Princeton U.
Benjamin Franklin - inventor and statesman
William S. Johnson - President of Columbia C.
George Clymer - U.S. Representative
Charles Pickney III - Governor of S. Carolina
John Francis Mercer - U.S. Representative
George Wythe - Justice of Virginia High Court
William Blount - U.S. Senator
Richard D. Spaight - Governor of N. Carolina
John Rutledge - Chief Justice U.S. Supr Court
William Livingston - Governor of New Jersey
Richard Basset - Governor of Delaware
William Houston - lawyer
William Few - U.S. Senato
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H.V. answers from Las Vegas on July 30, 2009
I was homeschooled and my parents would probably be considered some of the "pioneers" of homeschooling. They were considered pretty weird, if not mean, to pull us out of school at that time.
There are so many groups and activities for homeschoolers now. I can't imagine your kids would miss out on anything.
We didn't have as much going on back then, but we were still able to be involved in the local schools for field trips, football games, prom, etc. Plus we didn't have to waste our days in school learning what we could catch on to in a couple of hours or less a day. We had plenty of time for extra-curricular activities and so many learning opportunities that kids in school didn't. Not to mention, the strong values we were taught and self-discipline we acquired by having to allocate time for our studies.
We didn't know it at the time but we were so lucky to have such great parents who loved us enough to give up their freedom.
I turned out perfectly normal, graduated from college afterwards and even have pretty good social skills. ;)
Good luck and good for you!!!!!!!
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L.S. answers from Reno on July 30, 2009
I would also like to say that most people I know who were homeschooled resented their parents for doing so. I know it works for some families, but you really have to consider the pros and cons for your family. A great list below. I went to High School with many children that were homeschooled until then. They begged their parents to please let them go to school and socialize! My best friend and her sister were homeschooled until graduation. They are both now just experiencing the world and feel they've missed so much from being somewhat "sheltered". They had playdates and the likes, but it still wasn't the same as attending school. My husbands best friend also homeschooled and he's a little strange LOL married the first girl he met, now getting a divorce. He never experienced dating and socializing and having friends who were girls. Anyways, I wasn't homeschooled so I cannot tell you the pros. Seems like many cons, I can tell you I would have rebeled in a serious way if my parents homeschooled me. I ENJOYED my school years with my peers, and sometimes wish I could do it all over again. I had a great time, and I couldn't have had a great time stuck at home and having my "play" time arranged with kids I may not of liked, but were also other homeschoolers. YIKES!
Goodluck!
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S.G. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
You will get lots of responses - pros and cons. Ultimately it's your decision to do what's best for you child. However, I don't think it's a good idea.
1) Teachers are educated and trained to teach your child. Do you have those credentials?
2) Children learn from each other - from their questions, experiences and literally explaining a concept in terms they can understand
3) Different teachers have different expectations and grading standards, not unlike the real world. If you're the only one grading & judging their work, how will they get this concept? And, can you really be unbiased on an essay, art project, etc?
4) Children in school learn that it's not all about them, that others sometimes come first, get a turn, have a say, etc. They may not even get a say. If they're the only student in class, they don't learn this.
5) Other students naturally foster a sense of competition and goal to achieve. If they're the only student, they have no benchmark and no one to compete with.
6) It's good for students to hear other views on things and to be able to hear all sides of something and to develop their own opinion and thoughts, not just mimic yours. Even if you don't agree with what they come up with, it's important that they be their own person.
Yes, there are lots of pros. But every home-schooled child I've ever met just didn't seem to know how to fit in with the other kids, sometimes even seeming socially backward. Going to school is about more than feeding the brain some knowledge.
If you want to be more involved and have more control and say - then research the schools in your area (public & private) and find the right one. And, then get involved at the school and participate in all of your childs education and activities.
I attend all sporting events, church activities, assist in homework, vocalize my values and beliefs and back them up with reasoning, help research and fully debate topics of interest that maybe we don't agree upon or that they've heard about and have questions.
Good luck - you obviously care - so you'll grow amazing children I'm sure!
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T.A. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
I am laughing at most of these responses... "Lack of socialization" is one of the biggest homeschooling myths out there! None of the homeschooled kids I have met (and I have met many) are any better or worse than any schooled child. Kids are not "socialzed" at school, they are indoctrinated. Big difference
The reason why homeschooled kids appear to be "behind" when they enter public school is because it is a totally different "culture," if you will. It has nothing to do with them being socially awkward. There will always be socially awkward kids who are schooled out of AND in the home.
As far as the "real world" - school is not reality. In the "real world" there are no bells telling you when to stop your work and move to the next thing. There are no grades, punishments - you are responsible for yourself and your own survival. Homeschooled kids are in "the real world" every day, in "real world" situations - going to the bank, the store, watching (and perhaps helping) mom and dad pay bills.
Read John Taylor Gatto's Work. He is a former NYC "teacher of the year" who now promotes homeschooling.
If you decide to take the homeschooling route, look into John Holt - but definitely start with Gatto, as it will be a more enlightening and interesting initial read.
It's probably obvious where I stand on the issue, but I don't feel that anyone must necessarily feel the same as I.
Just make an *informed*, *educated* argument for or against and quit spewing junk about "socializing" and "the real world."
Do lots of research for yourself and you will be able to make the choice that is right for your kids and your family. Good luck with whatever path you choose!
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C.C. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
Hey A,
I was a teacher for 17 years and as a teacher I will tell you that educating a child is not for the weak. It requires a lot of work and planning. The plus side is that your child will not be exposed to other children's (and families) values...or lack thereof. Additionally, you will have all that valuable time with your child to assure that he or she is on par academically (as you are the one who will be monitoring his academic development).
I am expecting my first in January and I will be homeschooling him. There are a number of great homeschool programs out there. One of the biggest in Orange County is Saddleback Christian Academy. They offer a multitude of extracurricular activities with other homeschooled children and their parents. If this is not local to you, there are many other homeschool programs around just cruise the internet. It may require some research for you to find one that meets your needs, but the resources are endless, so you should be able to find something.
There is yet another great resource that gives loads of great information on your legal rights, resources, etc. That website is HSLDA.org
Also, I recently purchased a book on the subject by Lisa Whelchel (of Facts of Life) called "So You're thinking About Homeschooling". This book gives the experiences of 15 different families and what worked for them. This may be a great starting point if you are not confident that this is the way you want to go.
From my honest perception all the homeschooled children seem farther along academically and usually have the most incredible manners. Additionally, all my friends kids that have graduated from high school ALL got academic and sports scholarships. This is impressive to me as I know about 13 families that all homeschool their children.
As for socialization, you will have to be proactive to encourage his growth in this area, especially if your child is shy and I would start sooner than later. Some suggestions to meet that need are: get involved in a community playgroup, enroll your child in a sport or neighborhood activity, put your son in Boy Scouts, or you could always get involved at a local church which usually has activities available for children during the school year (such as MOPS, Awana, VBS, etc).
I sincerely hope this helps. It's always wonderful for me to see parents take an active roll in their child's education. I always found that the students that were most successful were the ones that parents were involved and interested.
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C.A. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
I know I could never do it. The only serious negative is social. Kids need social interaction, and they need to learn to take instruction from various people. As long as you know you are capable of teaching everything they need to know, and that you have the patience, you can do it.
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I.S. answers from Los Angeles on July 30, 2009
Look into Connections Academy, its a state run virtual school, you'll need a computer. My daughter used it through junior high and missed out on all the drama of bullying and what to wear. However, socialization is important, and there are field trips with this school. But if you're child isn't ready for a brick and mortar school for any reason, this is a great school. My daughter is now excited to get back into the social scene at the local h.s. Most of the kids at this school were either sportsmen, sick, or just didn't fit in at a regular school...sometimes because they were too smart.
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