43 answers

Home Alone - Desert Hot Springs,CA

I have a friend that just told me that she is leaving her four kids at home alone, in the middle of no where, at night. Both her and her man are working the night shift. Her oldest is ten and her youngest is three. This is distressing to me. When they came over to my house a couple months ago, they told me the three year old is a bad sleeper during the night and likes to wander the house. The have also mentioned in the past a pack of wild dogs near their house and that they don't let the kids play outside because of it. I feel like they are either going to lose the three year old to some horrible accident or the older kids are not going to get enough sleep to go to school the next day.
My questions are, How old would your kids have to be to be comfortable leaving them alone? Am I crazy to think this is stupid? I know she needs the money, cause they are always dirt poor, but still. Should I confront her?
Should I call CPS? I don't want the kids in foster care, but I really think she is endangering them.
Or should I just leave it alone and be grateful that it is not my kid? She has no family to help, but she has a friend that is close and maybe could spend the night....

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

I talked to my friend and told her I was really worried that they were home alone, and she kind of blew me off, 'I am not happy with it either, but the man's work keeps changing the shift on him. He is suppose to be working day shift which is what he signed up for, but they are jerking him around... We have hopes that he will get a day shift soon.'
CPS called back and said that there is no law that says they can't leave the kids alone, and that most likely the case will never be opened. At least I know I tried. i thought about taking the kids, but I don' t have a vehicle set up for 5 especially with two in car seats, and we live more than half an hour away. they are planning to move closer, and if they do, I will definitely be having the kids over more than she is awarem, though I will always tell her before I take them, obviously.

Featured Answers

I would definitely call CPS. Leaving children that age alone through the night while they are at work is neglect. Period. You have the chance to save a child's life. Please don't wait until something terrible happens when you could do something to save them right now.

Talk to the mother maybe there is some one in the area who could spend the nitht for a few dollares you are ritght to be concerned A. no hills

Holy cow!!! Am I wrong, or is this illegal????? If it were my friend, I would tell her that she needs to find someone to sleep there with them because it's illegal and she could get charged with child endangerment or neglect!!

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you know what, i'll just say this. i hope each and every one of you gets caught in your worst parenting moment by someone as heartless as yourselves and cps gets called and your kids get taken away. then maybe you'd wish someone actually gave you a hand up instead of instantly judging. i am literally sick to my stomach reading all of this.

3 moms found this helpful

Hi R., You should have not called CPS. it sounds like their live's are hard enough as it is. I would have had those kids camping out in my family room before i would have called CPS. The three year old can be trained to not wonder at night. CPS isn't for hard working parents who keep their kids in from danger from dogs. I pray next time you see how you can help before calling CPS on someone. For you know her 10 year old may be very responsible and reliable. My first born would have been, he started baby siting for people when he was 12. J. L,

Updated

Hi R., You should have not called CPS. it sounds like their live's are hard enough as it is. I would have had those kids camping out in my family room before i would have called CPS. The three year old can be trained to not wonder at night. CPS isn't for hard working parents who keep their kids in from danger from dogs. I pray next time you see how you can help before calling CPS on someone. For you know her 10 year old may be very responsible and reliable. My first born would have been, he started baby siting for people when he was 12. J. L,

1 mom found this helpful

It really is unbelievable what some parents think as acceptable. Leaving young children alone is nuts, imo. In an emergency, would they be able to respond rationally? I don't think so. Plus, it puts them at risk for predators. A neighbor leaves her son, who is 8, alone for a while in the afternoon before she gets home for work. I considered calling CPS. Now I know that CPS won't do anything, according to your info. Pray that those children will be alright.

That is child neglect. You are in a tough spot but they cannot do this. Something horrible could happen to those kids and if it did you would never forgive yourself if you did nothing. It's sad that they feel they need to resort to this but they must explore other options and CPS can help with this. Leaving young kids alone all night is not right and probably not legal.

I'm sure that was very normal in the fifties and sixties. Are you willing to help or just judge? We are way to judgmental in this society. If you call CPS you are not a friend. I hope you pray for the safety of these children and pray about your motives before reporting this to cps. They wont do anything but disrupt that home and tear it down. God Bless! J.

you should report this to cps because it is negelect the 10year old isn't old enough to look after a 3 year old. and besides that a 10 year old isn't even old enough to be left home by themselfs i don't know what the law is in the states but here in canada parents are not aloud to leave there kids home alone until they are 12 but it is only for a hour they are able to stay alone for longer when they are 14

She is endangering them. You and I both know this. What sad is that she knows this too. She has put this reponsibily on you. She is not a friend by doing this. Because now you are upset because you know in your heart the correct thing to do. If anything ever happen to them kids you would feel terrible. Tell someone that doesn't have any connection to you and her that you can trust and let them tell the authority. A good parent puts kids first no matter what

Wow,

I'm uncomfertable leaving my 15 yr old alone with my 2, 4 & 5 yr olds... I have in the past for an emergency. I had to take daddy to the ER, but we were only gone for about 1 1/2 hours, I had the cell phone on me, and the ER is only about 2 block or less then 2 min from my house. If need be we can walk to it.

I just had a similar conversation w/ my hubby just the other day... a lady down the road left her 2 yr old at home alone to walk her other son about 3 blocks to school. And another lady in the neighborhood leaves her 1 yr old to do the samething. I don't feel comfertable leaving my kids in the house alone and having my house out of my view... I have gone to the neighbors to help them w/ something when the kids are napping, but I stay outside where I can see the door to my house. I also have an alarm on my house that will go off if the doors or windows are opened... and the company calls my cell phone to let me know the alarm was set off.

I'm not sure what you should do... but I do feel you have a reason to be concerned & up set about it. I understand they may need the $ - I don't know many parents of 4 that don't, but the first priority should be the kids not the $. I also know it's not easy to work different shifts then the guy you love, but to make sure the kids are safe - you have to do what you have to.

I think if you did call on them - the kids would be removed from the home if the situation doesn't change.

Good luck!!!

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