C.D. asks from Houston, TX on July 24, 2007
Hitting - Spring,TX
My son who will be two next month is in a hitting stage. He is hitting everyone he knows, friends at daycare, grandparents, and even me. I don't know exactly how to handle this because this has become a major issue and I would appreciate any suggestions.
D.L. answers from Houston on July 24, 2007
I agree with the first response. My oldest daughter started biting. I was so afraid to bite back but, I knew that would show her it hurts but, I just couldn't pull myself to do it. Well she ended up biting my mother-in-law and my mother-in-law in return very nicely did it back to her. She has never done that again because now she understands its not funny, its not a game, it actually hurts.
H.B. answers from Houston on July 25, 2007
In my humble opinion, just ignore him when he does this. He is too young for time out, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics he should be at least 3 for this method to be effective. My son throws things, so I noticed that when I ignore him if he does that he'll shift his attention to something else. You could also try to distract him with something else, a new activity.
Does he talk? our doctor told us that because our son is a bit late in talking that he might be a bit more expressive physically.
I hope my babbling helped!
W.P. answers from Houston on July 24, 2007
I would hit back. Not hard, but instantly (!), within the second. Every single time, until he realizes that a) he does not get away with it, b) it hurts (increase the strength a bit each time if he hits repeatedly) and c) that YOU are in charge.
It may sound weird, but I do not look at this parental response as 'hitting' but as 'mirroring his action' so he feels the impact of what he does. If he stops, you stop. And the butt is the biggest muscle - you won't do any damage there unless you go overboard, which you definitely should not.
He may find that back and forth hitting funny for a while, but as long as you increase the force steadily, there will be a point where he does not like it anymore, and THAT is what you want him to associate with hitting. He should not like it.
T.M. answers from Houston on July 27, 2007
I've been dealing with this as well, but she only hits her younger brother. Someone suggested to me today to ignore it because she clearly does it for attention. She will even go put herself in the timeout chair after she does it, so she knows it's wrong! So, I'm going to try the ignore tactic this weekend and see what happens.
A.O. answers from Sherman on July 24, 2007
Whenever he hits, remove him from the situation and make him sit ALONE for a few minutes. Kids that age don't like being out the action so when you remove him he will dislike it. After a few times he will begin to see the cause and affect of hitting.
M.F. answers from Houston on July 24, 2007
Hi, my son is does that occasionally too. I tell him hitting hurts, or that hurts mommy and I make a really sad face (he is really into asking us to make faces: sad, happy, mad and surprised) this tells him that he made me sad. Or I take it a step more and say mommy is really mad because you hurt me/hit me. I also sit him in time out for 2 min and after the timer is up, I tell him why he sat there..."Hitting hurts mommy and it makes me sad; I love you but I don't like it when you hit me." Be very consistent with whatever discipline measure you take, at this age, it will take about 5-10 times for it to be effective. Good luck!