Hitter Suggestions

I am a teacher of young children and I would ck out or get some children's books at the library or book store on hitting Mom and start reading them each day for a while. A good one is Hands Are Not for Hitting and I Call My Hands Gentle. Mom.what type of disciplinging are you and Dad doing when your son hits? When he does this I would, get down at his eye level, hold both of his hands togehter firmly, look him in the eye and tell him in a stern but not raised voice , "No, this is not nice." then immediately take him into another room, like his bedroom, that is safe and make him have a 5 minute time out. Leave the room so he knows he will not get attention when he is making poor choices. WHen the T.O. is over have him come out and say he is sorry to ther person he hits.Continue doing this until it stops. Soon he will learn the consequences of hitting. Hope htis helps.

Hi S.,
It sounds like you are doing everything right.

I know that doesn't seem helpful, but really, you sound like a quiet, patient Mom, and that's what you son needs.

Maybe a little perspective: your little one is just TWO. He will have a hard time controlling his impulses normally, but he is only hitting every few days. Sounds like on "bad" days. We all have bad days, right? {wink}

Keep doing what you are doing. As he progresses developmentally, he will be able to control himself better and better.
t

Pick a response and stick to it. Nothing works because you're trying different things. He hits out of frustration, so tell him what he's supposed to do. If he wants a toy, say, "no hitting--say please", then
"thank you" when he gets it. Work with the older one to reinforce this. Do please and thank you back and forth every time you speak. Please and thank you are the "magic words"--they get you more of the good stuff than hitting. He just needs to know what to do to get what he wants instead of hitting.

My older was a hitter around the same age, and we successfully used time outs. If he hit (and he only ever hit me), I would take his arms, look him in the face and very sternly say, "No hitting" and then straight to time out. His time outs were in his room with his door closed, and at age two it was two minutes. It took a while though, so if you have not been at it very long, keep trying. Good luck...

Natural consequences, He hits, he's done, time for somethign else. Personally, i think he's a little young to make the connection to time out. Correct me if i'm wrong but the rule of thumb is something like one minute for every year of age. so a 2 minute time out. But a firm "NO" and being removed or redirected seems like it would work. TAke note if it happens say, right before nap or something like that, or before a meal when he's hungry, or when you leave the two kids alone.

Hello S., as the mother of 5 I have been saddened when my child went through this. We learned a valued lesson. I know you don't believe in spanking, yet there is a time and plac for all things. We learned the hard way that it was better for us to seriously punish for hitting, than to have another child hit him back and really hurt him becasue they have had enough. Our child was creamed by another childand I really could not blame him as he'd been hurt first, then the other mother refused to have them play together again.
We make our granddaughter sit on her hands on the stair case until the one she hit says its ok to get up. So sometimes its 1 minuet and sometimes its nearly 10 mins but we make sure the child knows its becasue of their actions that got them into trouble. Even at 2 they understnad this power.
Good Luck