High School Dances of today--Do You or Would You Let Your Kids Go?

Updated on September 24, 2011
K.S. asks from Ann Arbor, MI
12 answers

Okay, gals. What are your opinions on the current dance moves the kids do at high school dances? My daughter is five, but I cannot imagine allowing her to go with what I've seen at them.

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So What Happened?

I know, she's five. It just seems unlikely that dance moves will get more tame. I've chaperoned as a teacher (one time with the current style) and it was my last. It looked like vertical foreplay. I can't help but propel the situation up ten years.

I thought the fad of guys showing their underwear would die out, too, but it hasn't gone away.

(My rule in class is, "If your underwear touches the desk seat, your pants or too low or your skirt is too short." :)

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

It's just dancing. Every generation thinks the next generation's dance moves are horrid.
I allowed my daughter to go to her school dances.

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Your daughter is 5.
By the time she is in high school, I would guess things will be quite different.
My son is 16 and a Junior in high school. He goes to dances but won't dance.
He has been properly trained by me and his older sister as far as slow dancing, but the other stuff.....he wants no part of it.
Trust me, it's possible to have a teen who isn't into the "in" moves.

Thankfully you have a while to worry about it.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Teenagers have been bumping and grinding ever since Elvis started gyrating his hips.
As a teen in the 80s we all "freak" danced which is pretty close to what they're doing today (trust me, we got nasty.)
It's funny how it all seems fun and harmless until you grow up and it's YOUR child doing it, lol!
Personally I think it's a good way to burn off a lot of sexual tension, and we all know teenagers (of both sexes) are full of that. Better to do it on the dance floor than in the back seat.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

by the time she's in high school the "moves" will have changed again...

the only thing you can do is be a positive role model for your daughter, teach her by doing what you expect her to do...so she can make the right choices...

How would you have felt if your parents forbade you from going to a high school dance? Come on - they are teenagers! They are experimenting and developing their own space...don't you remember being a teenager?!

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L.C.

answers from Dover on

I was in private school until 11th grade and there was NO dancing. When I transferred to public school I wasn't allowed to go any of the dances except my senior prom, because my dad thought they were inappropriate and that I would be negatively influenced.

I felt like I missed a lot. There are peole with great memories about highschool experiences that I don't have because my dad didn't want me exposed to what he thought were sinful things. It's no fun to come to school on Monday after a dance and hear people talking about it and you are completely out of the loop. It's good to be included and I think it's a big part of the social structure that is high school.

I was also pregnant by the time I was 18, so as a form of protection from negative influences, I don't think it was very effective. You can not dance but still have unprotected sex with your boyfriend.

I might want to chaperone, but I will still let them go.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, my daughter is going to a Homecoming dance tonight.

There are plenty of chaperones, if some kids get too bumpy or grindy they are asked to tone it down.

Keep in mind that your parents probably freaked out when you went to dances because your dannces were oh so not mannerly.... It is like that generation to generation.

My daughter is going and I am sure she will have a great time. It is a part of HER childhood.

Communicate with your children and keep things open so they will talk to you and you won't feel so left of out the picture on things.

You still have a ways to go.... but they sure do grow up fast!!

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M.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

20 years ago the Mashed Potato and the Sprinkler were, "bad moves" it depends on the times and the trends. I went to a Christian high school where any kind of dancing was BANNED because it was the devils playground. YEAH YEAH... well if your kid wants to get into trouble and get into the family way, I doubt a dance is going to be the trigger. If they want to be naughty they will stop at nothing to do so. I would let them depending on the school, the music line up, and the chaperons.

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C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

Hi kindred-

All of my 'olders' have gone to HS dances...and this year the hs junior is going to homecoming with a date...(in fact are shopping for his purple shirt and tie today) and my freshmen girls are both going...in groups with friends.

I guess what is amazing to ME is that the 'more things change...the more they stay the same'! Looking over dresses for my girls last weekend, it could have been ME shopping with my mom in the early/mid seventies! The only difference is that 'I' as the mom was not 'moaning' over the styles...length...etc! We actually had FUN shopping...found a dress for one ON SALE...and had a great lunch, just me and the girls...

I hope they all have fun...and I hope that in 9 or 10 years YOU will find that it really is different...and yet so much the same!

Best Luck!
michele/cat

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A.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes, I let them go. It's silly, how they all crowd in together and thrust their hips, but it's pretty harmless. The thing that bothers me most about it is that they have no freedom to let loose and dance as they please. I keep telling them to break loose and have fun with the music, instead of being so stupidly constrained.

But fads are what they are. This one will pass.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Yes, I let her go.. I do wish e=we had an American Bandstand or Soul Train Program so you could see some normal average dancers.. That is how we all learned the latest dances. Now they watch these dance competitions or just the professional performers and cannot just have fun and dance.

3 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Houston on

Well, the dancing is the same as it was when I was in hs 15 years ago. Yes, I knew people being extremely intimate on the dance floor then (one girl I knew got pregnant)... and now it's just the same, if not worse. It's always been disgusting, and it will be in 10 more years when my kids are that age it will be disgusting. My boys will likely go to church dances where dancing codes are strict or school dances IF I am a chaperone.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

No one actually dances at our school dances. They either make out in the hallway til they get busted, the girls spend most of the night in the ladies room fixing their make up discussing which boy is after which girl, the boys huddle in a corner avoiding eye contact with the chaperones and acting like jerks to hide the fact they're all quivvering masses of self doubt.

Ahhh, youth!

My daughter goes to dances, my boys have never wanted to go.

:)

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