Help with Wiping After Going Potty

Updated on March 06, 2007
N.K. asks from London, OH
14 answers

my daughter is 3 years old and goes potty just fine. her problem is that when she's done she doesn't wipe when she's done. im a sahm and i babysit my 2 nephews age 5 months and 3, both boys. i don't always have to time to go in there and make her wipe. her private area is always red and when i give her a bath or shower i try to clean her good but she cries and says it hurts and holds her legs together. i have already bought the kandoo wipes. i can't think of anything to do for her to help her wipe better and not get infections. any suggestions would be great.

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So What Happened?

thank you everyone for all your suggestions. im now using the peri bottle on her and she loves using it. her redness has improved very much. ive also taken more time to go and help her wipe. thank you again for all the great advice.

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S.S.

answers from Cleveland on

I wish I could help with this too! But like everyone else, my 3 year old daughter is doing the same thing!! Ive tried the kandoo wipes and everything else I could think of. Its driving me crazy!!! I am a sahm of 3 yr old chloe and 10 week old kylie. Is this just a new phase the girls go thru??? lol

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M.F.

answers from Columbus on

Hello N.. First of all, I would suggest taking your daughter to the bathroom when you have to go. Let her see you wipe (from front to back). Children that age learn by example. And some learn by talking to them. I have one of both. LOL Secondly, I would give her some sort of yogurt product...this keeps female infections down. Last of all, when it's just you and her after your nephews go home, explain to her why it's important to wipe properly. but of course keep it on a toddler level. :-) Good Luck to you.

M. F

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C.J.

answers from Youngstown on

Hello. I know that you might be pressed for time, and have your hands completely full. But, my son is the same way. He is 3, and he doesnt wipe himself well. I have a 5 yr old, and im preg. again. And I work, but when I am home with him, I do wipe him after he goes number 2. I had to do the same thing for my daughter, my neice is 6 and my sister still has to wipe her sometimes, because she doesnt get herself clean. As frustrating as it might be, it really is the only solution until they can do it themselves. Good Luck, take care.

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K.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

Oh, you are not alone! My 3 year old does the same thing! It is like she is in too much of a hurry or something. I, along with others keep on her about it and tell her she really needs to wipe to keep clean but it really does no good :( I am going crazy and was freaking out thinking we were the only one that had this problem!! So sorry, no advice, I just wanted you to know that your daughter is not the only one not wiping!!

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G.M.

answers from Columbus on

You might check that her panties are abosrbant enough...perhaps thicker ones until she gets the wiping down pact. I have an almost two year old that I'm sure I will be potty training soon. I have so much work ahead of me!

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K.

answers from Dayton on

My daughter was the same way at that age. The nurse at our pediatrician said undies aren't nearly as absorbant as diapers are. So, focus on helping her wipe with toilet paper front to back. I only used the Kandoos for poopies. Then I dried her off with toilet paper. You want it as dry as possible in that area. If she's really hurting you might want to see the doctor to make sure she doesn't have an infection.

Best of luck. It takes a while (and patience) for them to get the hang of wiping right, but it's well worth it!

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A.S.

answers from Columbus on

My daughter was the same way and I know it's frustrating. Until she gets it down, my suggestion is that if you can't help her wipe, when you do get a minute at some point in the day, take her to the bathroom and give her a good wipe with wet wipes and change her panties if needed. My daughter got a UTI at one point because she wasn't wiping well enough so I had to start doing this. Another thing is that if she won't let you wash down there, let her play in the tub for a while so her bottom at least gets soaked well... and maybe a fun bath mit might encourage her to wash herself? My pediatrician said soaking in bubble bath can irritate it even more, so skip that. When my daughter's bottom was red I'd put some diaper cream or cornstarch baby powder on at bedtime and that seemed to help too.

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M.

answers from Cincinnati on

Perhaps leave a little peri bottle of just water next to the toilet so she can give herself a quick rinse, then a quick wipe? And that way, at least if she doesn't get all of the wetness dried away with toilet paper, she's only got water on her instead of urine (which is probably what's causing the rash)?

I think that what she's doing is very, very normal - developmentally speaking. The time you put in now for teaching her how to wipe well (even though you're really busy w/ 2 other kids & feel like you don't have time) will pay off as she'll "get it" sooner than if you are too rushed to help her. But I completely understand the dilemma of feeling like you don't have time - perhaps ask her to wait on the toilet and read a book until you are available to help her wipe?

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E.A.

answers from Toledo on

Have you checked with her pediatrician? She may have a yeast infection (if she's not getting clean down there, that happens sometimes), and if you've ever had one, you know how painful that is! I would at least call them and explain the situation, maybe they'll have some suggestions! Good luck!
E.

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J.D.

answers from Dayton on

If it is that red and hurts, she could have a yeast infection. Children can get them just as adult women do. Have it checked by the pediatrician. Good Luck!

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S.E.

answers from Toledo on

Unfortunately you should watch the people around your daughter that is a sign of molestation the fact that she does not want to wipe, and that it"hurts."

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A.L.

answers from Cleveland on

Maybe you could have a picture "check list" near the potty that shows the steps in using the potty. For example, a picture representing going potty, wiping, washing hands, etc.
She can use this as a reminder or reference and you can prompt her by saying, "did you follow all the pictures?" Maybe she can get a sticker or stamp or something when the steps are followed. Just a thought! Good luck:)

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T.R.

answers from Raleigh on

I wish I had some advice for you- instead, I have a request- My daughter also has the same issue. I'm interested in hearing what advice you get.
Good luck.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

I am going through the same thing right now. My almost three year old daughter has been potty trained for a couple of weeks. She goes to the potty then tells me, after she has pulled up her panties and pants. So I have found it handy to keep a couple of different containers of baby wipes around. One in the living room, one in the bathroom, her bedroom and her diaper bag. That way no matter where I am or what I am doing, the wipes are near. For the hurting vagina, make sure she doesn't have an infection, if she doesn't I have found that an equal amount of lotrimin and hydrocortison on the area help with the itch. Good luck, trust me I understand your frustration.

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