D.E. asks from Midland, PA on September 26, 2009
Help with 7 Year Old and ADHD
My DS just started the 2nd grade. He was diagnosed with ADHD in early 1st grade. He's been sent home with note after note, phone call after phone call about his behavior in class. Nick is a bright boy with good grades. He is generally a happy and outgoing child. The kids are alienating him and he doesn't seem to care about it. The teacher is having to deal with my son plus 21 other students and making it sound like nothing else goes on in the class except Nick's behaviors. The school staff are giving me the runaround about a wrap-around program that would benefit Nick's education. My hubby and I are VERY frustrated. We've gone through meds (Adderall, Ritalin, Metidate, Focalin... etc.). He experienced side effects from vomiting, lashing out, to impulsiveness to the extreme. Currently he is on Daytrana and his fears are so intense, he is terrified to leave the house, even to go to school. I have called the Dr. about all of this.
My question is what home/natural things can we do as a family to get him off meds and still lead a functional and HAPPY life? I don't want to pull him out of public school, but I will if need be. We have thought about Cyber schooling, homeschool and private school. What do I do? Our house is in turmoil. Thank you, moms.
So What Happened?™
So far, Nick has to have a psych consult on Oct. 5th to get Wrap-Around in the school. My husband is fully onboard with diet changes. We're looking into Feingold's diet and info. We're willing to let Nick stay in the school system and try the wrap-around, it'll take about a month after the psych consult to get it set up. I went to the SAP (Student Assistance Program) for them to help out in the classroom. It went ok, no funding = no aide in class. So, overall, changes are happening. I guess it's a work in progress. We are not opposed to homeschooling/cyber schooling in the future. Thank you SO VERY much for all of the info! You have all been a great support in my mothering career!!
Featured Answers
L.O. answers from Philadelphia on September 27, 2009
I would call the guidence office at school and request a meeting. Then ask about the behavioral plans that can be put in place for him. If that does not seem to work, call administration office and inquire about the special edu program that can help with behavioral issues. He might just need help controlling impulsive behaviors. The school will accomodate him, they have too!
Good luck!
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T.L. answers from Philadelphia on September 27, 2009
Oh D., I hear you with such empathy!! My son is only 4 and we have been through hell already. My 15 year old was a handful, never diagnosed, but none the less a handful. He is now an incredible student and has found what works for him.
I pulled my 4 year old out of public school and tried a private school. He was kicked out this past week. The issues in class are not as bad as she made it out to be, but in a nut shell, my son and a full classroom environment does not = a positive learning environment. So, I am starting the journey of homeschooling him. There is a great co-op that I am part of, lots of socialization opportunities. He is very bright and will be doing a curriculum that is one year ahead of his age.
We just recently tried a homeopathic remedy called Calm Forte by Hylands. It was recommended by the compounding pharmacist in our area. It took the edge off...and he was better able to focus. I only gave it to him once because now he is battling a cold and I did not want to mix with cold medicine. Check it out.
I agree with advice about diet and supplements. We give our son Omega 3's and he responds really well to them. If we run out and I don't purchase a re-fill within 2 days, I notice a difference. We also watch very carefully..food dye. He cannot handle food dye. He loses all focus and bounces off the walls. We also offer him Vitamin C, which is a natural detox as well as a good multivitamin. We had some lab work done to determine areas of which he was deficient and he came back deficient in calcium so we are supplementing with that too.
We are going to be using Calvert Curriculum. Google it. I am setting up a spare room as our "creativity center". This is where we will do all our work and creative projects. My son learns by being very involved and hands on.
If you decide to stay in the school, do you have an IEP? Have you requested a functional behavioral assessment at their expense? Have you requested a 1:1 aide? Does he get OT? Check out wrightslaw.com Have you ever read "the out of sync child?"
I opted to not use my energy to fight the district. I did not want my son's self esteem in the toilet because he did not fit into their "box". He may be a square peg, so I will use my energy to create a square hole instead of trying to cram a square peg into a round hole. He is brilliant and learns differently than others...and is ahead of the curve...
If you ever need to bounce information off someone, shoot me a message. I wish you all the best on your journey...
T.
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L.C. answers from Saginaw on September 27, 2009
I hate to say this, because it is SUCH a pain... but one of the things that I've known to work is massive dietary changes.
Have you tried omega3 oil supplements? They work really well for some people, but...
Most find that omega3 alone is not enough. They have to radically limit omega6 fats: sunflower oil, animal fats (dairy, lard, fat pork, lamb, beef fat, cheese) any kind of shortening or margarine (even the 'healthy' ones), corn oil.
I have also known people to have real success with a total elimination of grains (all of them, and all the stuff they're made from) which I think is just unbelievable. No pasta, no bread of any kind, no rice. Yikes! The people I've know who did it are all very happy with their choice, because the loss of favourite foods is nothing on the gain of calm, focused kids...
One friend and mother of 3 boys (which I think is ADHD all by itself!) followed what she called the 'caveman' diet: almost all meats, vegetables and fruits with very little dairy (mostly just as a condiment) with nothing made from grains of any kind. Her fibromyalgia cleared up as quickly as her boys' ADHD did.
I have also known any number of families (more than 10) who have had a lot of success letting their ADHD kids 'be themselves' through homeschooling, particularly letting them be outside and 'making things' with tools and materials, so their ADHD isn't about not complying with other people's ideas about what kids should be doing with their time, and enabling them to find their own strengths through doind what they want to (even computer games --I know one young man who is now a programmer, he spent so much time messin' around with computers)...
1 mom found this helpful
M.B. answers from Philadelphia on September 28, 2009
I agree with mostly everything from the PP, all natural remedies seem like the most effective way to go when meds don't help. I also think you should get him off the meds ASAP, especially since they are causing him to be "terrified". That is no good!! Who knows what long term effects being petrified to leave the house will cause. He is still a little boy, and he needs to learn that the world is not always a scary place. I hope you and your husband come to a solution that works the best for all of you!! Good luck!
1 mom found this helpful
P.C. answers from Scranton on September 27, 2009
I have heard that ADHD can be linked to food allergies or intolerances. Check out the book Mr Allergyhead (www.mrallergyhead.com)
1 mom found this helpful
B.K. answers from Pittsburgh on September 27, 2009
HI D., Just because you son has been diagnosed with ADHD doesn't mean he has to be on meds...there are other alternatives that you can try. I know two different families in two different states (they don't even know one another) with boys a bit older than yours that are treating ADHD with diet and excersize very successfully. the first thing they both did was remove as much sugar as possible from his diet. This includes the hidden sugars in fruit juices! Both boys only drink milk or water except on special occiasions. They both eat one banana a day, take a good multi-vitimine (one takes a vitimine called brainiac that his Gram's buys at GNC I think) and both do 3-4 physical activities after school each week. These include swimming, martial arts, dance (tap and/or hip hop), and a 20 minute kids cardo viedo (great for bad weather days), biking, soccer etc. The changes in behavior started slowly...and there were battles about snacks...but once on the program for a few weeks the change was dramatic and after a time treats were allowed with planning. Now after a couple of years both boys are doing very well. Sure they are both still high energy! But the control they have and their success they both enjoy was worth every moment according to their families.
Don't pull him out of school, meet face-to-face with his principal and teacher and counslor and present your game plan! Tell them what kind of disipline works for you at home, discuss all the options available! Don't give up or give in! Maybe a different class with a different teacher may be a good solution for now if you feel the teacher won't work with you or is overly sensitive to every thing your son does in class. Make sure you go into the meeting with notes! Be professional, be your son's advocate! He deserves the best from you and your school district! Don't let them blind you or baffel you with educational jargon and tons of bs! Don't forget to include your doctor in on your plan...no meds should be discontinued without proper supervision since some meds if stopped wrong can result in death (like Ridalin). I hope this helps or at least gives you some hope! Hang in there...at the end of the day it will all be worth the effort! Best wishes.
L.O. answers from Philadelphia on September 27, 2009
I would call the guidence office at school and request a meeting. Then ask about the behavioral plans that can be put in place for him. If that does not seem to work, call administration office and inquire about the special edu program that can help with behavioral issues. He might just need help controlling impulsive behaviors. The school will accomodate him, they have too!
Good luck!
K.D. answers from Dallas on September 27, 2009
Look up some information regarding foods that your son should or should not be eating to help him with hyperactivity or inattentiveness. You may be surprised at what you find! I have been told that this alone can make a world of difference with ADHD sufferers.
D.W. answers from Philadelphia on September 27, 2009
Go to the school superintendent or tell them you are going to if they do not give you some answers. I know it is hard dealing with a kid who has adhd. my best friends younger son has adhd and the older one just add. May be check into some holisitic approaches to medicine if the traditional ones do not work. have him some type of sports and see if that helps dissipate some of the energy. God bless and good luck.
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