Help with 2 Year Old Dressing Himself!!!

I really don't see this as a problem. We have a 2 1/2 year old two and she can't dress herself. She can get her pants off and her diaper but that is it. I don't think you need to worry. Some kids can do that really early and some can't. I definitely would not punish him for that. Just help him until he can get it. And is not a red flag either. So, just be patient and table it for now.

J.,

I feel your pain. My son is 3 1/2 and is just starting to actually get himself dressed. I tried for a while around 2 1/2, but I think he really wasn't ready. I know that some might say that they should be able to do things at a certain age, but really, you know your son so you should be able to judge what he is capable of doing. Once I gave up on trying to get him to do it all, we took a break, then I started with one article of clothing at a time. First we did socks. Then, after he was potty trained (right around age 3) we added underwear, and pants (he still needs help with zippers and snaps) and then his shirt (we still struggle with this one).

Remember that girls really do mature faster than boys, so she might just be ahead of him because of her gender. Also, I think personality falls into play as well, my son is not as independent as some of his peers, and lacks some of that "I'll do it myself" attitude that others have. I'm sure he'll get there, but until he does, we just take one thing at at time.

Good luck to you!
Jessica

I wouldn't stress about this - my son is 2 1/2 and only recently learned to take his pants and underwear off - just because he's potty trained. Meanwhile the little girl across the street has been undressing herself since she was about 15 months! My son also can't dress himself at all - we're working on the un-dressing first. I think it's very common for girls to learn the dressing/undressing way before boys.

I read an article the other day that you have to teach children how to dress themselves because they actually don't know how. With my daughter I sang the directions on how to put on her pants and shirts to make it a fun experience. This is something that doesn't work well when you are in a hurry but we played dress up at the house. Socks are frustrating and so are shoes, and I had to make sure that the clothes are ready to put on the right direction face up etc. Good luck and try not to get frustrated.

Please know that your son is normal. As a full time working mother of four, I can only say that one of my children could dress themselves at 2. Every child can do things at different stages.

I would continue to dress him during the week and save the learning for the weekends. It is no fun to go to work all stressed out each day over that. By the way, girls tend to do this earlier than boys do anyway. He is probably much more coordinated than the neighbor at other tasks.

I hope your mornings get better.

G.

It sounds to me like he's overwhelmed by your expectations. Don't gauge your son's development by comparing him to others. Your 2 year-old cousin really is the exception. Most kids still struggle with buttons, zippers, and laces until they're about 3. And still many kids can't tie their own shoes at age 4. If he's not potty trained fully, this is really an unfair expectation, as many kids have trouble with diapers and snap on type tops.

You might want to invest in toys that teach children how to dress. Stuffed dolls with buttons, zippers, and laces provide a non-confrontational way for them to develop the fine motor skills needed to dress on their own. There are also wooden puzzles that can serve the same purpose. I think Melissa and Doug brand has them.

If you want to encourage independence, I'd recommend setting out a few easy to wear outfits for him the night before, and let him choose which to wear in the morning. Invest in elasticized pants and sweat suits, loose t-shirts and pullover tops that don't require buttoning or anything complicated, if you want him to try and dress himself. Velcro strapped shoes and slip-ons will also help with independent dressing.

You want him to gain confidence more than anything. So don't put pressure on him, and make it as easy as possible until he establishes a dressing routine on his own. Most important, don't criticize him if he has trouble putting clothes on, or looks sloppy. It's the effort that counts. With time, he'll continue to develop the skills to dress on his own and in the meantime he'll develop the confidence to get the "snags" worked out. I'd say, expect to continue helping him for a while..at least until he's 3 to 3 1/2. If he gets it sooner, be happy and think of it as a cherry on top!

I would be positive when he helps dress himself or puts one thing on (start small), but I wouldn't punish him or give him time outs for not dressing himself. He is still really little and most boys don't have the skills to dress themselves until they are about 4. I have two boys and they weren't completely dressing themselves until 4 or 5. He might resist less if you let it go for now. Good luck--it will happen!

First of all, stop comparing your son to other kids. You will drive yourself--and your son--nuts.

You are in a rush in the morning, and he is overwhelmed by this task, and the speed in which he needs to do it.

In the evenings and weekends, when you have more time, let him dress and undress himself. Give him lots of time and make a game out of it. Maybe give him a bear or doll that he can dress and undress, too.

FWIW, I would not expect a 2 year old to be able to dress himself fully.