HELP (Mom in Denial Who's Son Has Brain Damage)

I am very sorry for you and your son.
The one thing to keep in mind is that your son has already proven the doctor's predictions wrong a few times... and he may continue to do so.
I do not want to give you false hope, but really, it is very, VERY hard to make a prognosis for what he will be able (or unable) to do in a child this young. The brain is an amazing organ and the younger a victim of traumatic brain injury is, the more resilient they tend to be.
You do not sound like you are in denial, but simply refusing to give up on your son. Keep on fighting for him, get him every therapy under the sun, keep on working with him and he might amaze you...
Good luck!

Wow this sure is stressful but there is lots of hope. I am a physcial therapist in michigan. First find out of any craniosacral DO's or physical therapist that are your area that works with Babies. you can also google cranioscral DO's classes geared for kids find out who is teaching it then call that person. They maybe in your area or know of someone who is. crainosacral will help keep the skull moving the correct way and make sure the fluids are draining correctly. This will help the brain heal and function better. Second you can get some flax seed or tuna oil into your child. We use biotics and standard process. Oils are extremely important for the brain. I poke a whole in the capsule. then squirt it into the child mouth.Then check for a pediatric Feldenkrais practitioner in your area. anat baniel is great but I don't know where she is living currently. I have seen many children who were told they wold never xyz... but they do when parents do more than traditional physical therapy.
Feel free to call or email me. Peace and Good luck. K.
I would hop on it ASAP. Good luck

Having hope that it will turn out for the best does not mean that you are in denial. You know that he will have challeges, like the gtube, but you just have no idea right now how he will do. You should probably go back to the doctor and ask them what they saw and concluded about the latest MRI since what ever they told you left you with more questions than answers. Brain damage is unpredictable, and you just never know how things will turn out.

I would suggest that you contact the county board for developmental disabilities in your area and get a case worker now. They can help you access services in your area as he develops and get you early intervention and support services to help maximize his function. Contact NAMI in your area and see if they can put you into contact with a tramatic brain injury support group. Easter Seals could be a resource for you also and may be able to put you into contact with another family with a simular experience.

I hope that he will continue to improve.

M.

I don't have any helpful advice for you, but I just want to tell you that I prayed for you today and for your precious baby. I hope that you get the answers you are seeking. Take good care.

Molly

I am truly sorry that this horrible ACCIDENT happened to your family. Please don't blame his grandfather. Tripping over a moving animal happens to lots of people, and is truly an accident.
As for your son, you need to remain in close contact with his medical team. Losing his ability to suck is not a good sign for continued improvement of brain function, but it may not be the end of the road either. Listen to them, and get second opinions. Educate yourself about brain injuries. (Not just on the weird internet sites. Research things in medical journals.)
Also, you should realistically be prepared to raise a child who is going to be developmentally disabled and require continued medical care for his daily activities. I would recommend that you contact your county Regional Center and see if someone can give you some resources or suggestions. The state has an agency called the Department of Developmental Services. Their website has links to the various Regional Centers and other agencies that might be able to provide you with advice and support during this tough period in your life.
Please, take a deep breath, and start researching. The more educated you are, the more prepared you will be to handle this situation. My thoughts are with you.

Hello N.,

I pray that God helps you, your beautiful baby and your family. The way I look at it, a mom never gives up hope ... even to the point of 'denial'. My brother had a brain injury, he was in a comma for 30 days and they said he might never recover. Well, Praise God! He did have to learn everthing again... walking, talking, writing, etc. so, keep praying. talk to your baby, sing to him, read him stories, read him the Bible, rub his feet and arms, comfort him, play childrens music for him. hold his hands. let him know you're there and that you love him any way you can. ask your church to keep praying for him. May God give you the patience, discernment, strength and endurance for whatever may come.
Next time grandpa comes to visit, have him read a story. He also needs to heal.
~C.~

Hi, I agree with Jen B.'s response wholeheartedly and all of these wonderful people on this board. I will be praying for you and your precious son. This may not be the same exact situation but I wanted to say that my brother was dropped when he was a baby too and it was severe. He is now 58 years old and doing well. I am not sure what percent of his brain was damaged and this was in the 1950’s but a lot has changed in the medical industry since then. It's so important to keep praying for him and keep working with him. Just like Jen B. said, as long as he is alive, there is hope. I will be praying for you all every day. Please keep us all posted on his progress. Love and prayers, S..

My heart goes out to you and your sweet little baby so much. By all means, hold onto hope and don't let go. I am convinced that a mother's love and a mother's hope are two of the most powerful things on earth!! I am happy to hear he is improving, just keep finding out what is available to you and knock on every door you can. Fighting for your son is your best strategy. You did nothing wrong leaving him with grandpa, it was just a terrible accident and I am so very sorry. I liked what Katie S, shared from a medical standpoint, maybe she can help you more in finding out what else you can do. I have been praying for you and your little man and I know that God is the Healer both of the body and of the broken-hearted. You son is alive, thank God, and where there is life, there is always hope. Hang in there and I wish you and your baby all the best. Forgive yourself mama, you did absolutely nothing wrong....sending you hugs~

Oh honey! I feel so bad for you and your family! I don't have any answers for you but I just want you to know that you have lots of support and prayers from us moms.

I am truly sorry for your heartache..I was so teary eye just reading your story and I will keep you in my prayers. Please forgive yourself and grandpa, I can't even imainge what everyone is going through but I do hope with the grace of god that he keeps you and your family strong. May god bless you and your family.

I am so sorry to hear this. I will keep your family in my prayers.
Please don't blame yourself for leaving your baby with grandpa, this was a horrible accident. I hope you all can get through this together and your baby has a beautiful life ahead of him.

God bless

My step dtr at age 18 mo had an immunization shot that she had a severe reaction to and left her with permanent brain damage. I didn't know her back then but apparently my hubby and his ex were told that she wouldn't walk, talk, feed herself, take care of herself, etc. My husband fought for her therapies and services from the state (her diagnosis is moderately retarded) and she is now "high functioning". In the 3 years I've known her (she's 14), she has come a long way. She basically has a problem with speech and brain issues, but physically can take care of herself (with reminders) and does wonderfully on her own. So there is always "hope"!!! Be diligent in all therapies and services that they will provide for him. It was too much for my husbands ex and she walked away from him and her daughter. At age 11 (when I came into the picture of course) she decided she wanted to be a mom. That's another story. But be ready for the long haul. I'm sorry you are dealing with this but know that it may turn out and you can still have a wonderful loving child. Blessings to you and your family.

Please don't think it is your or grandfather's mistake - it was a horrible accident. Don't live with the guilt! I will pray for your son and your family for healing. I agree with some of the responses - have hope and faith in your son and talk to him. Work with the therapists in making sure he is developing to his fullest potential. Signs that he is improving is encouraging! Stay strong mama!

Ditto to Andrea. I'm soo sorry that this happened to your beautiful family. I pray and hope that he will. There are miracles out there, but you should keep a realistic head so you wont get disappointed, but at the same time still hope. . . if that is possible.
Keep working with doctors and therapists of all kinds. Maybe a second or third opinion?

I am so very to hear about what you and your beautiful family are going through. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I am so sorry this happened! I can not imagine what you are going through. Try to stay strong and pray, pray, pray. I will pray for you to. I dont know the grandpa, but tripping could happen to anyone. Im sure he feels very bad about what happend. I hope in time you will be able to forgive him. im sure he never meant for this to happen. You or your husband or anyone could trip at anytime and have something happen. He has made it this far, so just keep praying that he will get better and better each day. It will be a long road, and i hope and pray everything turns out ok down the road. Just remember god never gives you more than you can handle.

There have been miracles, and prayer is very powerful. I don't know if you're religious or not, but if not, now would be a good time. Spread the news that your baby needs prayer. I have seen unimaginable things happen (even miracles) when many many people are praying for someone. I wish you good luck and blessings.

I think you should know about one thing-the brain of kids has the unusual ability to recover. Have you ever heard about some animals that after they lost a part of their body they have the new one,the new part of the body can grow up.
Nearly the same can happen to the young brain.It sounds like a fairy tale but it is true.It happened many times.So that is the human brain.
Well,you should believe in it and do the best for your baby.And you should love him more than other moms do it.
God bless you and your baby

Please get counseling!

You did not make a mistake. Women all over this world leave their children with caregivers of all sort - including grandparents.

Accidents happen. They are unfortunate. But it wasn't his fault either. And this is probably tearing him up as well. You need to help each other through this.

The prognosis doesn't sound good. But talk to the doctors. Get a second opinion. Ask them this specific questions.

God bless and good luck!

i am so sorry for wat has happened to ur baby. i dnt have any answers to ur question but i will be praying for ur baby everyday...with god on his side it is possible to prove any dr wrong...keep ur faith in god healing hands

I'm so sorry...I have no experience with that but my heart was breaking reading your story. I just wanted you to know you're in my thoughts and I'll be hoping for a positive outcome for you, your son and your family.

(((((Hugs))))) and prayers to you, your son's father, and your precious son. More for Grandpa, who is likely hurting as badly as you are.

It's hard to say what his outcome will be, sometimes very young children make miraculous recoveries and sometimes they are left with davastating disability. The thing is, no matter how it turns out, he is still your little boy and you will find joy with him in life.

I am a special education teacher and have worked with many different types of disabling conditions; some very severe and others mild. I want to tell you that there is worth and love in every single life. From the middle school aged boy, who was oxygen deprived during an operation, who couldn't talk, but could sit with the band and use his foot to play the bass drum in perfect time, all the while smiling hugely- to the little girl I was told was too retarded to talk, but did, after her and I sat day-after-day in a quiet hall alone, while I held up common things and over-enunciated the words over and over. Or to the boy who the doctors said was going to die from some very rare disease within 2 years, that was 17 years ago, when I saw him in the store a while ago back he took my hand and hugged it, whispering my name. Their families learned to live with what life dealt them, and the children develop special bonds with those who love and care for them.

Contact the agencies that can assist you and him, such as the regional center, the social worker at the children's hospital can help you.

Life isn't the same for everyone. His will be what the Heavenly Father ordains. You will both have lessons for each other and trials to weather as he recovers. Never give up! That's not denial it's hope! Have abundant hope and love for him.

Please please forgive his grandfather (and the cats!).

I will continue to pray for your little guy and hope for one God's special miracles!

I am so very sorry for your baby and your family. I am sure you have all been through so much in recent months. It sounds like you really need for someone who is a clinical educator at a children's hospital to sit down and talk with you to explain things in simple, honest terms. The brain is so complicated, having different areas of the brain that control different things from cognitive thought to temperature regulation and many many more. You need to know what the mri showed about the severity of the damaged areas of the brain as well as what that means long-term for your child. If you are able to arm yourself with honest information, you might be able to find the best therapies that will make the most difference. Until you understand what this all means, it seems it might be even more difficult. I respect you for taking this all on. None of us sign up for an injury like this one to happen to our child. That being said, you as the mom have a magical ability of making the best of a tough situation...be sure to make time for your self to grieve the "loss" of your once healthy baby too. This is a life-changing experience and you need to take care of YOU too!

I am so sorry! I just wanted to wish you all the best with your baby. I just cannot imagine what you are going through with him. Please never give up hope and pray and pray a lot.

I see you've gotten a lot of good advice here. I just wanted to suggest that you look into hyperbaric chamber therapy. For some people with brain injuries, it can be very useful.

Best wishes.

You should absolutely get your son into early intervention ASAP. They will be able to do therapies with him to help his development along.

Hi it is so hard reading of your terrible experience because it makes me think of when our precious baby son ended up in ICU after suffering a Brain Injruy from falling off our bed. Words can barely describe what it feels like, seeing our boy's beautiful brain on the MRI image, flooded with blood and black areas of dead tissue. It was like, where has he gone? is he still there if all that brain has died? We have lost some of who he was, and that is a grief everlasting. But, he is still our son and we have been in awe of him growing and defying the odds by walking, talking and generally just developing into a little 3 year old. There are permanent disabilities. That can get you down if you focus on it. But when we're around him, we feel so filled with love and gratitude that he's alive. A few things to consider as your boy grows - try to feed him things that will nourish his brain, including plenty of fish oils and Omega 3,6,9. I think that may have helped or son.