E.S. asks from Spring Valley, IL on March 20, 2008
Help!!! Curious Little Boy??
I have a four yr old little boy who has more than one time been caught inappropriatly with another child. Under the covers half dressed etc... Started around 2yrs. old. Went away for bout 1yr and a half or better.. Now just recently he was said to of touched another little boys private on the pre k bus. Any suggestions??? Curiousity or more serious??? Ne one else go through this???? Am i alone??
T.W. answers from Peoria on March 21, 2008
I am a mother of four a 21 y/o, 9y/o, and a boy and girl who are 5 yr old twins. they are also very curious, my son was caught in the girls bathroom with a girl in the stall while she was attempting to pee. also it seems to be funny to talk about private parts. I just tell them that it is not right to see other peoples private parts, i am also a nurse so I know that around this age, they start getting feeling in their private parts. just watch it, he should grow out of it
B.M. answers from Chicago on March 24, 2008
If you've already had the talk about how there are parts of his body that only should be touched by a doctor or a medical person if necessary or when being bathed, etc., you can help him understand that the other child has the same rules, so they can't touch one another. Probably, the less of a big deal that is made, the better, as it is probably normal curiosity and there's always that comparison thing that goes on. He is right at the age where this is common, as I recall. We had some similar things happen when our kids were 4 or 4-1/2. They have all grown up to be well-adjusted adults.
J.W. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
Hey E. S, honey welcome to the world of change. Children have always been curious,if you think back you were once curious about things too. Solution: It is a known fact that the children of today are more conscious to things and about things than the past generation. I would simply sit down with him and talk to him on his level and trust me he will tell you why he does this, maybe, probably someone did him out of curiousity, we as parents will be surprise at the things that our children have done to them and they don't think it is wrong. So talk with him and tell him why is it wrong, why it is a NO! NO! COMMUNICATION is everything and it can start now. I am sharing what i know from experience. Bless you and may God protect your son and your family.
R.M. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
I wouldn't freak out, probably just curiousity. But that wouldn't stop me from having a talk with him about it. Let him know that his hands are to be kept to himself and other people's hands are to be kept to themselves. I think most kids need a lesson in "touching".....for safety reasons too.
M.B. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
My advice is to watch the t.v. shows he might be exposed to and block them because television is a big influence on kids.Try to have a pep talk,ask him why and do you want to act this way because his actions can really effect on the future of his life.You must really put this head first this situatuion can result of a very bad behavior especially during teenage years as of making your son queerish and no you are not the only one catch it now and you should be good.I really hope this helps.
M.Y. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
I wouldn't panic, but I would be concerned...
Do you have the special conversations with him about strangers, body parts, privacy, secrets, etc? If not, this would be a good time. If you're not confortable, ask someone to give you the words to say or to have the conversation with you.
You definitely want to make sure that he's not been taken advantage of instead of it being just a simple curiosity issue gone bad!
S.V. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
It is normal at this age. Just normal childhood curiosity. Just calmly talk to him that private areas are private and we don't show others or touch others what our bathing suit covers. It's important to talk about it with him, but don't make too big a deal of it because you don't want him to think you are mad at him. I have seen people get really mad at their kids, yelling at them (we had a situation like this with another family members child exposing himself to my boys and even found him trying to force my boys to take their pants down!) I really freaked out and it caused some unnecessary hurt to all involved. My pediatrician was a real help in dealing with this issue also. Hope that helps.
S.T. answers from Chicago on March 21, 2008
I had the same situation with my five year old son. He was taking little kids to the corner to see their private parts. We (my husband and I) had to assure him that although he is curious, it is not appropriate and should not do that. It took some time but he finally is over his curiosity and found something new....my computer :-)