Help! Breastmilk or Formula

Just to touch base on the diaper changing:

My son was allergic to WIPES. It was so bad he'd have yeast infection after yeast infection, and his skin would break and bleed. As soon as we tossed the wipes, the yeast infection cream actually cleared up the infection for good, and he was never red again. Even before he was at the broken skin and bleeding, the influx of air blowing over his infection just burned, burned, burned.

Low and behold... there's a really inexpensive and completely allergen free alternative to wipes:

Paper towels + water

(you can even use WARM water;)

You just get them wet under the faucet, wring them out, and wipe.

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Bless your heart! I would stick him back on the breast immediately! Try to get him to latch on again. It might take some work, but don't give up! If you get frustrated just keep trying. If you can, don't give him a bottle at all.

As for the diaper changes...it is what it is. Neither of my kids liked having their diapers changed when they were babies. Just try to make it as quick as possible (I know..easier said than done when your baby is shrieking at the top of their lungs) Try singing a song while you're changing his diaper. That helps to calm me down and sometimes even works on the babies :)

You're right...all the books make it sound so easy. Just do ABC and your baby will be happy! Well, not so easy sometimes!

I would bet you are doing a fantastic job, even if you haven't had any experience. :) Babies just need a few basic things: a clean hiney, food and lots of love.

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Poor H.! You are working so hard! I am so impressed at how intuitive you are about your baby's care.
Here are a few ideas to add to the ideas you have received:
--Good for you for being proactive and making an appointment with an LC. Please make sure she is an IBCLC-certified lactation consultant. This is the highest level of certification and will ensure you do not end up talking to a well-intentioned but untrained nurse who does not have the expertise to really help you. Also, take a notebook and pen to write down her suggestions and *plan out your questions and concerns ahead of time*. Hospital-based LC's are crazy-busy, and after waiting a whole week for an appointment, you don't want to feel like you got the brush-off because she only had 20 minutes (or however long) to spend with you.
--If you want to breastfeed, consider calling your local La Leche League Leader ASAP. She is trained and qualified to help give you current, medically-accurate information and all LLL services are absolutely free. You can find your Leader at www.lllusa.org. There may be a meeting near you very soon, so you could attend and meet with Leaders in person.
--In way of encouragement, let me just say that no artificial feeding method beats the convenience of breastfeeding--nothing extra to clean, nothing extra to fix, no worries about safety (many meds are compatible with breastfeeding) and total confidence your baby is getting the superior infant food every time he is fed. I, too, had never been around babies much before I had my own. Now, three sons later, I am grateful every day I am a nursing mama, for a thousand reasons.The connection we have from nursing continues even as they wean and grow into strong, healthy boys. There are so many health benefits for both mom and baby that simply cannot be replicated with any artificial food--your milk is so perfect for your son! Feeding your baby is not about being "good enough" when you can offer "superior" in every way. It even seals up his intestines against foreign proteins to reduce the risk of allergies! I read a study a couple years ago that said when a baby cries, a mom who is artificially feeding turns away and turns her attention to the sink and bottle, while a breastfeeding mom turns her attention immediately to her child. This was an amazing observcation to me, and confirmed to me that nursing a baby reinforces the attitude of "relationships first," and "People before things."
-You're in the brutal newborn stage. It's not this intense forever. Think of this as your investment stage. You're coping with all kinds of inconvenience and stress NOW so you can have a relaxed, confident and convenient breastfeeding relationship later.
--BTW, it's not about guilt, it's about knowledge. I agree--don't waste energy on guilt, use it on getting accurate information that will help you give your baby the perfect, superior care he deserves--that only you can provide.
--Milk production is all supply and demand. The more milk and more often is removed from your breasts, the more you will produce. Pump for 2-5 minutes after you see the last drop expressed to provide additional stimulation. Keep Baby skin-to-skin and at the breast as often as possible; there's no wasted time at the breast. Even if he is not nursing, his presence against your skin will help boost your prolactin hormone levels.
--Avoid artificial nipples. All Baby's sucking should be at the breast to trigger your hormones and encourage more milk production.
--Remeber, breastfeeding is a confidence game. If you think you can, you CAN. Watch Baby's stool/urine-output patterns for reassurance he is getting enough to eat, and don't worry about ounces and schedules and other mental gymnastics that are not reliable indicators of milk production. He is very young and small--at this age his stomach is the size of a ping-pong ball or smaller, and your milk is so perfect it is digested within 90 minutes. It's OK if he wants to nurse often--this is normal and helps establish your supply.
You are so devoted! I hope you have lots of help available so you can focus your energy on recovering from your birth trauma and learning to mother. Hang in there, and feel reassured others have struggled and overcome, too. You can do it! Best wishes to you and your family!

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As far as the diaper changes, all newborns scream - they just don't like being laid down with their diaper off. It's startling to them. Just change the diaper as quick as you can. If the skin is a little red, you can put some olive oil on it at every diaper change to head off diaper rash. Don't use baby powder or corn starch - it just feeds the yeast.

Sounds like you really want to breastfeed, so go for it! Just put your baby to the breast as often as you can, and then after he has nursed for a while, top off with formula, gradually reducing the amount of formula you give each day. Since he is only 10 days old, you should be able to relactate pretty easily, as long as you can get him to latch well. Even if he is not getting much milk from you right now, don't worry - at this point, it's about stimulating your nipples frequently, something that baby will do much better than the pump. I wouldn't pump unless the baby won't latch on or isn't feeding frequently. Seriously, if it were me I would take 24-48 hours to just do nothing but lie around in bed with the baby, skin-to-skin, and do nothing but nurse and nap round the clock. Even if he will not latch on and nurse at first, rest and do the skin-to-skin thing anyway while giving him a bottle. Just don't give up, if breastfeeding is what you want to do.

All newborns have immature digestive systems, which is why they have so much gas, burping, crying, etc. It is normal and not a sign that something is wrong. In the long run, you will have fewer digestive problems with breastmilk than with formula. Breastfed babies don't need to burp much. It's not likely that gas and crying would be a reaction to the drugs you were taking - I'm not saying it's impossible, but usually drugs have the same side effects on babies as they do on adults - sleepiness or whatever. BTW, there are very few drugs that you cannot take while nursing a baby - many moms get incorrect advice to wean.

If you want some "emergency" help before your appointment with the lactation consultant, you can always call the La Leche League hotline at 1-877-452-5324. I would really suggest going to a meeting! You can get lots of good help and support from other moms.

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keep pumping it will not just disapear over night. you will fluxuate up/down. relax when you are pumping if you are averaging 1-2 oz at a time you are doing great. as for his little bum dont use wipes use soft warm wash clothes like you did at the hospital. have your hubby go to joann fabrics and buy like two feet of soft fabric and wash it then cut it into squares make sure they are a decent size. also dont be afraid to use diaper cream not the ad ointment with the clothe diapers, it says not to but i never had a prob with it, it just stains them thats all. do both breast and formula it wont hurt him at all. dont beat yourself up over not being exclusive. my lo is almost a year and she did fine on both. gl

You are doing great. Being a first time mom is not easy. It takes a while to really get comfortable. Good luck.

C.

Holly, I would love to chat with you if you have time. Do lots of skin to skin and really let the baby to your breast. Pain killers can make babies belly's hurt, so that could be alot of the trouble. You need to nurse nurse nurse, or pump pump pump and lots of skin time for you and baby to help those nursing hormones pumping. If you really want to breast feed than go for it!! You will do an amazing job. Warm wipes on the bum are so much easier, babies HATE cold and act like the world is coming to an end when they are cold. So keep him warm or half swaddled and put cream on his bottom to help with the redness. I like wadella or Arbonne.

H.,
A bumpy welcome to motherhood!
First of all talk to, sing to or just IGNORE the screams during diaper change. I think some kids just hate it more than others. Make hium feel secure by keeping a hand on him (I know--hard to do while changing a diaper!).
As for the feeding, do what YOU think is best. make your own mommy decisions based on your situation. I had no interest in BFing and gave my son formula exclusively and he is a happy, healthy, brilliant 7 year old. Don't buy into the guilt if you want or need to stop BFing your baby. Just listen to your instinct (it's in there!) and discuss with your pediatrician--call them anytime--that's what they're there for. Congrats and enjoy that little one!

p.s. Problem with books is that the babies haven't read them yet!

Until you see the LC, try to put him back to the breast as much as possible. If you are not successful at a feeding with getting him on the breast, then make sure you pump every time he feeds...even if you don't get much...pump at least 15 min. Some Moms don't get much out of a pump so don't worry too much about the amount. Drink lots of water and eat well to keep (and rest as much as you can) to get supply up. There are herbs and things you can take but with a baby that young you don't want to really take too much of that. Try to feed breastmilk in the bottle so he doesn't get too used to formula. Make sure you are using the slowest flow nipples possible on the bottles, and when you give him the bottle make sure the whole nipple goes in his mouth so that his lips encircle the wider part of the nipple (oh and the wider nipple you have the better). Don't hold the bottle up and down, makes it too easy to get the milk out fast and once they get used to having it fast they don't want to go back to breastfeeding cause it's more work. Hold it so that just a little is in the nipple at once and try to use bottles that don't have alot of air in them. My personal favs are Playtex with the drop in liners. You can squeeze the air out almost completely and they have nice wide nipples that are shaped more like a breast. If you get the rubber nipples instead of the sillicone (clear) it stretches more like a breast does as well.

To help with latching him on the breast, you want to make sure his lips are wide and flared out on the breast and that he takes as much into his mouth as possible. Also lots of skin on skin will help encourage him to try to nurse......undress yourself and hold him on you directly with only a diaper (you can always put a blanket over him if you worry about him getting cold). There are alot of good videos here http://www.drjacknewman.com/video-clips.asp
Also you can probably get some free help by attending a La Leche League meeting. Don't worry about it being so difficult to get out or baby having to feed during the meeting. They have all been there/done that and only want to help.

It is kind of hard to describe in writing but the videos give you a better idea. And with one so little sometimes it is better/easier to use football hold (http://www.ehow.com/video_###-###-####_breastfeeding-foot...) so you have more control over their head. Then you can bring their head into the breast yourself with your hand while your are cradling their head when their mouth is open fully. A breastfeeding support pillow also does WONDERS as far as helping with proper latch and positioning. My Brest Friend is the best one. A boppy is pretty good too, but doesn't have the cutouts/indentations on it to show you where to properly put baby. Propping up with regular pillows is so frustrating...never enough support and they are always slipping out.

As far as the diapers go, when they are newborns alot of times those changes do involve blood curdling screams. As another poster said, putting something with some weight on his belly can help calm them....just a hand if nothing else, but a bean bag or something like that with a little weight would be best to steady him. If his bottom is really red and has rashes though I would try other things. Vaseline is good if there isn't a rash, just redness, to make a barrier to protect the skin from wetness. If there is a rash, Desitin (regular NOT creamy) is the best. There is a reason it has been around so long. Not sure what PP has a problem with about it, but it has the highest percentage in it of zinc oxide which is what helps heal the rash. Triple Paste and creamy Desitin only have like 12 or 16% where as Desitin has 40% zinc oxide. Try other diapers, cloth is good too, I have used both. I too like Pampers swaddlers for the newborns but Luvs are excellent too, and I have recently started using Costco's Kirkland brand for my older child and they are great as well. For cloth, I like the cotton prefold ...they are a little trickier as far as cloth goes, but it is pure natural cotton on the bum, nothing artificial. You don't have to pin them nowadays they have these things called Snappi's that are like rubber bands with "claws" on them to grab on and fasten the diaper and then you put a waterproof cover over them.
This is a good place to buy them
http://www.nickisdiapers.com/
Or for more info about cloth diapering go here http://www.diaperpin.com/howto.asp

HTH. Taking care of a new baby is definitely an overwhelming learning experience. Take it one hour at a time and try not to stress too much. This time is so precious and I know when I was a brand new Mom I was so stressed about doing everything right I didn't take the time to cherish my little one and now he is 6! Time flies....even though it may seem an eternity that never ends right now. Good luck!

Try useing baby wash cloths and warm water instead of wipes when changing him. I know when my kids get any tipe of rash wipes just seem to make them worse. I'm sure others have told you as well to try and dab as much as possible instead of wipeing. He probably has a bit of fear from the sore changes but that should subside after a while. Try singing or something to distract him until he gets used to it.

Hi H.,
Congrats on the new baby! It's definitely hard, no matter how many kids you have when they are brand new because they are all different! Regarding the hiney rash, I would say that when they get all irritated like that, baby wipes can cause pain because they have alcohol in them. Something I've done with both girls, which isn't easy but does help and eases pain, don't use the wipes. Carry them to the sink, and use a little bit of mild hand soap on his little butt. Then blot it dry with a towel and if you can stand it, give his butt a little air, leave the diaper off for a tiny bit. It will help speed the healing. I also use boudreaux's butt cream too, and it helps with the rash, then after it's healed, use a little aquafor or something that would be a great barrier for keeping moisture off his skin. You're being very diligent keeping up with the pumping too, congrats on that! Keep up with the pumping, and then maybe it still wont be enough, but maybe you can at least combine it with formula when the drugs are out of your system. But good luck with your newborn! It does get easier!

H.:
You've got some great suggestions. One other thing I'd add to the lactation consultant-you should be able to find an IBCLC to help you TODAY. You don't have to wait, and at this point you need help ASAP. Look for another one, or you can contact me and I can put you in touch with some so you don't have to wait until next week!

first of all, i assume that all your meds are OK for breastfeeding mamas? I'm sure you checked with your doctor but just wanted to make sure since all drugs do pass through the milk to the baby.

in terms of the diaper changes, yes they cry but screaming blood-curdling cries don't sound right. if he's red and sore, its probably hurting him when you change his diaper -- don't use wipes until he's not red anymore - just soak some soft gauze, washcloth or viva papertowels (this brand is like cloth) with warm water and wipe him with those instead until the rash disappears. also try to let him air dry as much as possible if the rash is really bad. once the rash is gone you can use desitin to keep it from coming back (it'll hurt if you use it now if his rash is bad). finally, you dont have wipe when its just pee. only poop. excessive wiping irriates his sensitive skin. good luck!

H.,
I am so proud of you--you must be a great mom. After all you've been through, you are still so concerned about your baby! I'm sorry it was a rocky start, but it will get better. Don't worry about never having babysat, etc. before...we all are inexperienced when it comes to our first kid! It is so different with your own child anyway. I just want to encourage you to call your doctor whenever you need to--especially since your birth was rough. Don't feel like you'll be a red flag to them if you call them frequently. On the contrary, they'll know you care. It always helped me to call the doctor when I wasn't sure. Things get better after the first month! :-)
As for diapers, my kids did the same thing with disposables, but not with huggies. I could use huggies and homemade wipes. As for nursing, go ahead and talk to the doc about your concerns. They won't mind a call ahead of your appointment. Good luck with everything and may you feel better soon!!!

PS Books may make it sound easy, but it isn't. Check out Vicki Lovine's books. They are candid. Girlfriend's Guide to the First Year of Motherhood might help!

H., you are going to be a great mom. You've got the "mom's instinct" and that's half the battle!

Diapers: my son had a sensitive tush too. Cheap diapers were out of the question. We alternated between pampers and huggies and I bought the sensitive wipes. We also slathered on the Desitin and I mean THICK. Having that barrier really seemed to help him.

We also watched him like a hawk. The minute his diaper was wet, it came off and sometimes, we would just let him "air" for awhile. He did outgrow this sensitive stage, but all kids are different, so watch your little guy carefully.

Feeding: You've made the perfect first step by contacting a lactation consultant. It's good that you've found a formula that he's compatible with, but bringing in the professional can assess your personal situation and give the advice you need.

All you can do is try your best. If one thing doesn't work, try another, but you will figure it out. Good luck and keep us posted!

Oh I'm so sorry you are having problems.

Diaper issue, if the cloth diapers are working as far as the redness then stick with them. The reason it might be soaking through the other diaper is b/c you have to point his boy business down into the diaper. All little ones cry when they get their diaper changed, it is cold and they dont like that at all. Just try and have everything ready ahead of time and be quick as you dont want to get peed on.

BF or formula issue, I didnt breastfeed but I have heard the more you pump the more you produce it is a supply and demand thing. Keep on pumping and see if he will take it from a bottle, but check with your dr and his ped. about the meds you are on first before feeding it to him. I think your appt with the Lactation Cons is a good idea and good for you for being proactive about that.

Remember to take care of yourself and dont be afraid to ask your family for help especially since you had a few problems with delivery and afterwards.

Hi, H..
I am a mom and IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant). I'd like to offer a few tips before your appointment.
a) I agree--make sure you're seeing an IBCLC for best care, but keep in mind that IBCLCs also have different areas of expertise, so if you feel you still don't have the answers you need, contact another IBCLC.
b) What kind of pump are you using? To bring in a milk supply, and maintain a milk supply when temporarily bottle-feeding, it is imperative that you are using a fully automatic double electric breast pump. This would be like the Medela pump in style, Ameda purely yours, or rental pump. Many pumps available from chain stores are for occasional use and will not sustain (or build) your supply.
c) We watch moms who hemmorage and need transfusions *very* closely. Blood loss can affect milk supply. Weekly weight checks are a good idea. If your supply is not where it should be, your doc can prescribe medication that may help. With your birth history, I'd be inclined to go with medication not herbs (basically, bring out the "big guns").
d) It is also super important that your baby is on a bottle nipple that supports a breastfeeding suck. The website www.breastandbottlefeeding.com has some helpful tips on nipple selection (as well as choosing a breast pump). It also links to the book Balancing Breast and Bottle: Reaching Your Breastfeeding Goals, which has tips for when moms combine breast and bottle feeding.
Hang in there! Feed your baby, and get help. :)

Your baby may have yeast infection on his bum. You may want to have him checked. My second baby, I have used the vaseline mostly for his red bum. It seems to work well. As for breastfeeding, my son never wanted anything to do with my breasts. I went to the lactation specialists a couple of times. I had in my mind that this baby would have the breast milk. So I purchased the Medela backpack style breast pump and started pumping. I kept trying to do the breast feeding but he for some reason could latch on correctly. So I pumped my milk in the beginning every 2 hours, storing the milk along the way. I never took anything to increase the milk supply. I just pumped and it let my body know to produce more milk. I actually pumped my milk for 4 months straight and had enough milk that I froze to last until he was 9 months old. Then I had to start mixing the formula with the breast milk. I think you should try whatever is best for you. If you can get your baby to breastfeed again, then by all means do it. If not, then if you are willing to pump, because it takes a lot of dedication, then try that. I wish you luck with your newborn baby, they are a lot of fun. Enjoy the time you have with your baby and husband.

Some babies just hate being changed, and your little guy may hate it until he is potty trained. I had one that kicked and thrashed and cried every time and he was my good kid. = ) It does sound like he had some sensitivity to the disposables so cloth was a good move. Just stay consistent now. One thing I have learned over the years is babies do not like things changing on them, they love things to be predictable. Another thought is, if he has a lot of gas then that may certainly be attributing to the crying during changing as well.

Now as far as the pumping. You will have to pump more and more and more to keep up your production. You will never be able to produce as much as you would with nursing but you can increase it. Be sure not to be too upset if your baby doesn't take to the nursing again, they just do not always go back once they get a traditional bottle. Don't let it get you down, this is pretty normal. You can choose to keep pumping and bottle feed your breast milk or you can just keep trying to get your baby to nurse, sometimes they will take it back. Usually you have to omit the bottle to avoid more nipple confusion. It really is hard.

Regardless of what happens with your milk production, just remember the most important thing for your baby is you and a healthy you at that. We all know that breast milk is the best but we all also know that babies that are formula fed are healthy and prosper as well. Don't sweat it! = )

Enjoy your little guy, you will not believe how short your time is with him, and you will not believe how hard it is! But all worth it.

Good luck!

i am a new mom. my baby is 9 months old now. Breast feed! you'll loose a lot of weight. stop consuming All caffeine, cut back on cheese, beans, broccoli, gassy veggies, and spicy foods. keep taking prenatals! this will keep your milk less gassy. give him gass drops. my hospitol said it was it was ok to take my pain meds even tho i was breast feeding, it didnt hurt him.Use vaseline on red booty. it seriously works in 2days. change diaper every time u feed. you can have like 15 diapers a day. he cry during diaper maybe because it hurts his irritated skin. use vaseline all the time. after a few months it will get easier and u can change ur diet back.

I nursed both of my bio-kids (and am still nursing one of them), but had to supplement as well. You all ready have lots of suggestions for bringing your milk supply up, so I just wanted to let you know that many Mom's do end up using a combo of formula and breast (no matter how much we let the baby suckle, how much we pump with our fancy Medela pumps*, or how much fenugreek we take). So - if that's how it shakes out for you, try not to feel bad - you aren't alone in that.

* I use Medela "Pump In Style" and like it a lot.

It's still LOVELY every time you get to nurse your baby. If you aren't able to switch to exclusive breastfeeding, it's worth knowing that SOME nursing beats none (assuming YOUR health allows it - baby needs YOU long-term more than he needs breastmilk short-term). Low flow nipples on the bottles while your baby is little will be a must though - I use the ones in the Medela kits. You can get them at Target.

My babies never refused the breast as the result of getting a bottle, but every child is different, so in the end, the main thing is to simply do what works for you and your baby.

As to the diaper changing. Our first son got diaper rash so bad his skin would break open. Burt's Bees diaper ointment was like a magic potion for him. If you haven't all ready tried that, I'd recommend it. It's expensive, but it goes a long way. You can probably get that at Target too.

Oh - I forgot to add, don't use store-bought wipes on your baby's bum. They irritated 2 of our 3 kid's skin terribly! Get some cheap baby washcloths and use one dampened with warm water instead!

Good luck!

You know, if the breastfeeding doesn't work out, IT'S OK! You will live, the baby will live, and everything will be OK! A lot of Le Leche Nazis will chastise me for saying this, but sometimes this part of caring for a little one just doesn't work out the way we had envisioned. At that is OK. I tried everything with my babies, too, and also had problems in the hospital, surgery, medications, the whole nine yards, and no amount of pumping could solve it. I cried and cried, consulted with lactation consultants, took more medication and other natural remedies for milk production, all to no avail. I did what I could for 12 weeks with both of my babies and then resorted to formula. And you know what? Everyone is OK! Alive, healthy, thriving, the whole bit.

If you can read my question history if anything to show you you can do it if you work at it but best help for milk production is pump 5 min past the time milk stops coming out for me it is aprox 17 minutes...also pump every 2-3 hours during the day. I am feeding a 7 week old solely pumped and I make just a tad over 1oz ecery hour. that is .5 oz on each side every hour...you should hopefully make between 24-32oz of milk a day I have spent 3 of 7 weeks of my daughters life in the hospital a lot of which I had to pump and dump.

if you really want to breastfeed, get in touch with your local la leche league right now. They will help you for free.

And for baby diaper rash, I highly recommend Desitin. Our daughter had terrible rash once and the doctor said to get whatever had the highest level of Zinc Oxide, as it keeps the moisture away from the skin. Worked like a charm.

It might help to use a wipes warmer, if you arent already, cold wipes might also make him scream.

ok the other answers are long (as mine probably is) so i'm not reading them and may repeat. diaper changing: if his bum is red he may very likely have a yeast infection. take him to the pediatrician to be sure. if you have been using diaper creams and he's still red, it might not be the diapers. my daughter was allergic to the zinc oxide in diaper creams. it was more painful for her to have diaper cream on. but the doctor told me the most important role of diaper cream was to form a barrier against the wetness and there are other products without the zinc oxide that can be a barrier. so to control yeast infections i tried other things to keep her dry: letting her lay a little while with no diaper, patting her dry after diaper changes, gentle lotion on her bum, when she was older i let her sit in the empty bathtub and play naked.
Breastfeeding: i had low milk production with my first and third babies. i have found herbal supplements, such as fenugreek and More Milk Plus, to be very helpful. i know More Milk Plus is at Good Earth but i have found fenugreek at many pharmacies.
you are doing awesome! keep it up!

I've heard that sometimes feeling so open when getting changed can freak some babies out - they're usually naked and I guess it's like freefall for them. If you have a beanbag or washcloth or something to lay on his chest so he feels the pressure, it might help.

Breastfeeding is NATURAL, but not necessarily easy. Often it's the baby that has the issues (suck, high palate, etc.). Don't beat yourself up, but get some help - See a lactation consultant re. the breastfeeding. My production was way down due to illness and not BFing for a week. I ended up using a tool that was like a formula IV - a 6 oz capsule of formula clipped to my bra, with a VERY thin tube that went from the capsule to my nipple. With a little maneuvering the baby was able to BF with the tube and got my milk as well as the formula. His nursing increased my flow, and he go the extra formula he needed till my production was up. It was very cool. It works better than pumping.

Good luck!