Hi T.. I understand what you are going through. My 12yo son also has ADHD and it is tough. We had a small amount of success with the medicine, Aderall-XR, for awhile when he was in the 3rd grade but he said it made him feel like a zombie so we eventually stopped that medicine. Also, right around the same time that the developmental pediatrician was experimenting trying to find the right dosage for him, the school ended up placing him in the special ed class, not because of his ability to learn, but because he just had a hard time learning in a large classroom environment. The developmental pediatrician says that he was probably acting out due to his frustration of not being able to focus in the classroom, not being able to complete his work in time, consistently getting in trouble, etc. I was resistant to having him move to the special ed class at first, but once he switched to the smaller class of around 8 kids, it was like night and day. He learned well and got all of his work done, displayed no behavior problems, and made the honor roll consistently. Because he was doing so well in school, things were also much better at home and he and his dad clashed alot less. He did all of this without medicine. However, now that he is in middle school and is once again in a large classroom setting, he is once again struggling so we are in the process of trying to identify some good options for him so that he can remain in a regular classroom. We also had some success with using a behavior modification sheet. The behavior chart contained a list of five realistic goals set for him in areas that he needed to work on that he could realistically achieve 50% of the time, and as he improved we'd raise his goals. If he accomplished the goal the teacher would mark 'yes', if not she'd mark 'no'. The teacher would then total up the number of yeses that he had for the day, he'd bring it home, and we had a point based system that we used that would determine the privileges that he earned for the day then for that week. He basically had to earn everything that he got to do, like TV, computer time, dessert. Everything. If he didn't earn it, he didn't get it. That was probably about the most successful approach that we used. It just took the right teacher that understood how to develop such a plan and us stepping up at home to develope a system of rewards for him based on what he earned. There's alot more that I can share with you if you want more info on the behavior chart that we used. I could share an example with you if you are interested. Just let me know.