6 answers

Has Anyone Heard of PMDD or Has It?

I am 39 and work full time. I have a 14 & 6 year old boys and a 17 year old step-son. Every month when it is time for my period, I get really bad PMS. I have been reading about PMDD and I am thinking I have that. I feel like I am going out of my mind when this starts. I think I have a about 1 week out of a month that I am happy and feel good about everything. The rest, I can't stand my self, my husband, or my kids. My 14 year old is only here for the summer but my 6 year old and my 17 year old step-son are with me everyday. I hate lashing out at my little one. Sometimes all he wants is a hug or to sit next to me and I feel like pushing him away. My 17 year old step-son just does things to just irritate me. I can't stand to be around my husband. If he walks the wrong way or says anything to me, I feel like I'm going to blow up. When I try to explain the way I feel to him, he just doesn't get it. He just sees it as me being a nasty person and tells me to go see a doctor to fix it. Anything will make me cry. The day it starts, I can tell as soon as I wake up. I have like this huge weight on my shoulders and I can't knock it off. I am this totally different person. I have this rage inside of me and then I just start crying and cannot stop. I go to work and I am fine for a little bit and then I just can't concentrate. I live in a small town, so the company I work for is small, so it is just me there, which is fine. I am never mean or rude to anyone that may come into my office. I never had it this severe until the last few years. I moved 1500 miles to be with my husband. Away from family and friends so there is really no one to go to. I know being far away from home just adds to it. I live so far away from anything. I takes like an hour and a half just to go to a Walmart or a mall or any nice restaurants. If I had somewhere to go to let this frustration out would be nice. When I go out of town and there are things to do, I love it, but coming back into town, I hate it. There is absolutely nothing to do. I could go for a walk, but when it's like 106 outside, that's not going to happen.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thanks for all the info!! I did go to an ob/gyn and she put me on YAZ.. So I guess I'll see how the next few months go. If it doesn't work, I will for sure be going back.

More Answers

I had PMDD too. I almost lost my marriage because of it. It's was like being a third person. I could hear and see the things that I was doing, but I couldn't control it. I was put on an anti-depressent specificially for PMDD...and it helped. But I also had endometrosis and because my uterus walls were thickening...it played with my hormones. Have you ever been told you have endometrosis...if not, talk to you OB about it. I had severe endometrosis and had a hystertomy (sp? sorry), but since I had that done and am on hormones...I don't have the reply of the earlier years. It is terrible on my family. It's also hard on you because you carry guilt for the way you lash out...my husband didn't get it either which made me even meaner to him. Looking back now, I am surprised he never left. He took a lot of BS from me...I hope this helps.

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Yes. I am 46 and have had it a long time, but recently just realized it. It is PMS that is so bad that it effects all of your relationships. Talk to your gynecologist. I also started having long periods. I was a candidate for an Oblation. This is where they go in and lazor the inside lining of your uterous. You no longer have periods. My doctor would not comment that it would also help with PMDD, but it has! I am never moody anymore. I also take Effexor for depression (a low dose). I was taking the Effexor before I had the oblation and I still had PMDD, so I know the Effexor was not the thing that solved it. It was the Oblation. I feel like my old self again.

J. D.

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I do understand what you are going through. I have PMDD and have aboout one good week a month. Noises really bother me, i am over-sensitive and bitchy and get horrible headaches. This in addition to all of the PMS symptoms. I have recently begun taking Paxil when i begin to feel it start, but i'm not used to it so i don't think i am always catching it soon enough. We'll see how it goes next month.

You also sound depressed and resentful(maybe)that you had to move and it is making you want to lash out at your husband. I would talk to a dr. about it and be sure to tell them just how extreme the symptoms are. Finding a therapist to talk with could also help. I am doing all of these things because i have ppd and then i get the pmdd on top of it and it makes it feel so much worse.

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J., You've received alot of good advise. I encourage you to find a Dr. who will DO SOMETHING to help you. Doing nothing can destroy your marriage, your family. Even if you have a patient husband and your children are able to love past your irritability, they all are suffering as much as you are. Get help. Even if it means going outside your locale for a Dr. who is knowledgable. All my life I had long and horrible periods, and now know the hormonal imbalance was dramatic, but always felt it was just my problem. Even after a hysterectomy I wasn't put on hormones or treated for the issues caused the deficiency. You have to take control and find treatment yourself. You have a wonderful source of education and encouragement here at Mamasource that we didn't have 30 odd years ago. It's most important you get help as soon as possible to neutralize the situation before your husband gives up on you and your children are emotionally hurt by your inability to be the constant loving person you want to be. May God bless you and your family.

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I am sure I have PMDD and don't have a very good three weeks of the month as well. It also sounds like you might also be suffering from depression. You may want to check into that as well. I have had depression also and I feel for you. Best wishes!!

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Hi J., I really feel for you and your situation. You've already received some good advice. I just want to let you know that I have recently had a similar experience and have seen my way through it. My situation is one of wild hormonal fluctuations. Yours may be due to similar or different causes, but no less difficult to live with. There is help and there is hope. May you find both. Good luck and keep your head up.

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