18 answers

Gross Pregnancy Anecdotes...

Ok, so I'm bored sick at work. There, I said it.

So I was just looking for some interesting reading... and got to wondering...

What is the grossest thing you experienced during pregnancy? Or the most obnoxious thing you had to deal with during your pregnancy? Please, feel free to include all the gory details. Yes, I'm THAT bored.

~~~

This is mine, hands down.

We all know that constipation is one of the common unpleasantries we pregnant ladies deal with. In my last pregnancy with my son, I had it BAD. I was about 6 months along, and I was deathly constipated. So much so, that as I was trying to push this BM out, I was thinking to myself that I should NOT be pushing like this, lest I wished to birth my child into the toilet. But as it went, I continued to push, until finally, the tip of the BM emerged. I know, this is gross, but hey, that's what this post is all about. So, I continued to push, but alas, it was STUCK. SO, I had to do the unthinkable, and actually 'manually assist' myself in 'birthing' this BM. Yes, I actually had to reach around and pull. I can't believe I'm even typing this. Let me tell you, it was unworldly. I couldn't believe that a BM of this size could fit in my body, nor come out of my body, if you know what I mean. It was AWFUL with a capital AWFUL. Talk about a huge sigh of relief when it was over. LOL

So that's my story. As it goes, my son, at about 2 years old, had some trouble with constipation, and I ended up 'assisting' him in moving his bowels a few times, much in the same way I had to help myself. So if nothing else, my experience was good practice for what was to come!! I guess God works in mysterious ways? :)

Ok, what's your story?

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

@Tracy K. ~ OMG, that's hilarious!!!! This doesn't even compare, but your story made me think of this... my current OB has a GORGEOUS piece of eye candy medical student spending some time with him. So much fun to spread your legs to bear your stuff in front of this 'doc' whilst explaining your terrible internal and external itching from both internal and yep, external yeast infections. Seriously? Not to mention that I had waited so long for them to come in the exam room while I was sitting there nekked from the waist down with the paper draped over my legs (he was at the hospital and just getting back to the office), that when I had to scoot down to the bottom of the table for the exam, my @ss was stuck to the paper from the sweat, and the paper tore, I had it stuck to, well, everything... talk about mortified. I could feel the blood rush to my face... Oh well. C'est la vie! The student was extremely professional, and did joke appropriately at the end of the exam, which did put me at ease, and I thought it spoke to his developing bedside manner. BUT STILL.... Sheesh!

~~

@Rebecca B. ~ OMG on the plug coming out all over 'him'!!!!!!!! Fantastic!!

Featured Answers

My worst was the delivery of my 1st. I was taking a phlebotomy class and the instructor was smokin hot. He was so gorgeous, you could see all the girls eyes glaze over and grin ear to ear when he came in the room. He told me he worked in labor and delivery. I asked what he did specifically. He said "you know, this and that" with a smirk. I had no idea what he meant, until I was in labor pushing and heard my hot teacher yelling at me to push. Apparently he's the guy that delivers the afterbirth (ewwwww) and does the epesiotomy repair. Hot teacher sewed my va-jj up. I was freakin mortified. I had to go back to class and look this guy in the eyes after he had more intimate knowledge of me than my husband!

18 moms found this helpful

my grossest thing was...

At 9 months pregnant sex is tricky in its self. But we managed and when it was all said and done.. he started to freak out. When I looked at what he was freaking out about... my plug had released and it was covering "him".

That was a pretty gross sight and needless to say the last time before the baby came.

14 moms found this helpful

More Answers

My worst was the delivery of my 1st. I was taking a phlebotomy class and the instructor was smokin hot. He was so gorgeous, you could see all the girls eyes glaze over and grin ear to ear when he came in the room. He told me he worked in labor and delivery. I asked what he did specifically. He said "you know, this and that" with a smirk. I had no idea what he meant, until I was in labor pushing and heard my hot teacher yelling at me to push. Apparently he's the guy that delivers the afterbirth (ewwwww) and does the epesiotomy repair. Hot teacher sewed my va-jj up. I was freakin mortified. I had to go back to class and look this guy in the eyes after he had more intimate knowledge of me than my husband!

18 moms found this helpful

my grossest thing was...

At 9 months pregnant sex is tricky in its self. But we managed and when it was all said and done.. he started to freak out. When I looked at what he was freaking out about... my plug had released and it was covering "him".

That was a pretty gross sight and needless to say the last time before the baby came.

14 moms found this helpful

About 8th month of pregnancy walking down the main street of our town..wearing a casual dress with sandels...underware elastic was stretched so far...all of a sudden...they dropped to my ankles...behind us walking was about 4 sailors dressed in there cracker jack uniform.. Sister reached down and helped me step out of them and we kept on walking.

14 moms found this helpful

Dear lord, L., your experience sounds too close to home after I had surgery and the pain meds plugged me up. Even the Fleet enema wasn't enough. That's why I urge anyone on here getting ready to have surgery to buy stool softeners and Fleet enemas and eat prunes. All three!!!

I guess my grossest moment was projectile vomiting when I had to pick up the dog's poop and throw it in the toilet. I was right there at the toilet - all I had to do was move my hand and drop it. But my whole stomach turned inside out with absolutely no warning. I didn't even get it IN the toilet! Instead, I threw up all over the bathroom! I had just gotten back from an unusually successful dinner too. The doc had charged me with gaining one pound a week because I was not gaining enough weight, and I lost that dinner.

My poor husband had to clean up the bathroom. He never asked me to clean up the dog's poop during the rest of my pregnancy!

D.

12 moms found this helpful

How about a funny story??

I have to say that one of my funniest stories is of the Anesthesiologist. He was the "trainee" if you will. At first, he was very appropriately located near my head. He wouldn't look, turned around when necessary and stayed away from the bottom of the bed.

I couldn't get numbed up with an epidural. So he was hanging out with me a lot as they stuck me like 20 times but nothing. So when the OBGYN came to give me the final check before saying I needed a c-section, I saw him at the bottom of my bed, totally watching her check me. I didn't think much of it - he's a doctor, a professional - who cares. He's seen it all before. But all of the drugs they gave me (Demerol) had it's affect on me and when I took my bra of for surgery, I whipped it around my head while looking right at him.

And to be more of an idiot (I'm so sarcastic) as I was leaving the hospital and pushing my newborn in the bassinet down the hall, I saw him and he said - oh, you're up and around. I almost didn't recognize you! And I said - of course you didn't, I have my clothes on.

My husband laughed out loud and this poor young doctor just shrunk down and said congratulations!! I'm so ashamed (well, not really).

11 moms found this helpful

I think the absolute worst for me was when I "lost" my mucus plug. it's gross just even the word, but when you go the bathroom and you wipe and that huge nasty glob of slimy snot junk comes out on the toilet paper it's revolting. NOTHING I dealt with (and that was a couple infections and a c-section) were as disgusting to me as that.

I mean pregnancy is beautiful and we all glow or whatever.......

7 moms found this helpful

Well, my first son was born 5 weeks early and we never made it to our lamaze class and I never experienced any signs of labor. So when I was pregnant with my 2nd I wasn't 100% sure what that gross, snotty looking thing was that fell into my underwear so I made my husband look at it :) he still hasn't forgiven me!

7 moms found this helpful

Bwhahahaha!!!!! L. that's so gross ;-)

My favorite pregnancy book is "Our Bodies, Ourselves: Pregnancy and Birth"
http://www.amazon.com/Our-Bodies-Ourselves-Pregnancy-Birt...
One reason I love it is that it has diagrams of what our organs are doing as our fetus grows (check out page 49 of the "Click to look inside"). Most books show a fetus growing inside of a headless, silhouette lady. With these diagrams, it's quite clear WHY pregnancy can be uncomfortable/constipating!!!

I really lucked out with pregnancy in most regards. It was low risk, no morning sickness...easy peasy. EXCEPT that I had intense pain after month three. My sciatic nerves were on fire. I could barely walk by week 30; My husband had to help me roll over or leave bed. I hated it. On the plus hand, it was so consistently painful that by the time my (long) labor rolled around I was ecstatic and just ready to do it.

Good luck getting through the rest of your day (tick tock, tick tock...j/k)!!

6 moms found this helpful

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